u/chihiro_itou

You have been venting to me about your problems since I was 10. Telling me about all your miseries, all the problems in your marriage. Never once cared about my feelings, always treated me like your therapist. So I grew up to be an avoidant who doesn't share her own feelings. Too afraid to be vulnerable with anyone.

When I was an angry 13 year old who couldn't coddle you, you convinced me that I was a psychopath. It gave me the worst identity crisis.

But I forgave everything, because I felt pity for you. I always thought you have a shitty doomed life, a bad marriage and no access to therapy, so you had no other choice.

But recently when I was saying that I would never marry a guy like my dad .. you said "he's a decent husband. You don't know about the love he's given me. I've only told you about the bad times"

Are you f*cking shitting me mom? All this time you could've been telling me good stories about love and care, but you chose to just use me for venting. You could've taught me what love is, but you only chose to teach me resentment and despair?

And you know what's the worst part? I can't even hate you bitch. Because you didn't do it out of malice, you're just too f*cking immature.

I'm 21 and I compulsively, uncontrollably talk to imaginary people because I can't be vulnerable around real ones. Everyone keeps asking me why I'm so quiet. Trying to stop this compulsion is driving me crazy.

And now you're telling me you caused all this damage for no reason? And that your life wasn't all that bad?

Should I prep@re for Mtech cybersec IIT Delhi, or try to break in on my own?

I have 3 years of undergrad left. Doing 5-year Integrated MSc maths at one of the NIT.

But f₹eshers aren't taken for cybersec r0les right?

Pls lemme know

Slightly long post. Thanks for the patience

My ex / best friend (21M) is depressed and sui*ical. Let's call him S. His dad always used to beat him up as kid. And S always felt like his mom loved his cousin more. She always compared him to his cousin, and S used to work hard in school to get his mom's validation.

But depression started when he was 18. It was his gap year for college entrance exam.

For context: We're from India and these college exams are not just for ambitious but for survival. They're too competitive, and taking a gap year means the pressure is insanely high. Every year many students unalive themselves due to these. 1.2 million participate and only top 30K get good colleges. You HAVE to study 7-10 hours daily in gap year to make it.

S has this habit of making goals and becoming insanely devoted to them. Complete tunnel-vision. He says if he is able to achieve his goal, it'll show him that his life is worth living, that God cares about him. He made getting into the top colleges his dream.

But his mom didn't take his dearer-than-life dream seriously. She always used to do things that disturbed his studies when the stakes were already too high. S used to cry and beg her to stop and let him study but she ignored his requests.

He says he felt abandoned by his parents and God. They never listened to him and he felt like he was shouting into a void. But despite all this, he had to stay strong and study constantly. He used to watch them enjoy festivals without even asking him to join, because they thought he was just a sourpuss. He felt unloved and isolated.

He eventually failed the exam, and ended up at a college he hates. Every single day he wakes up and wants to kill himself. Every morning , when he has to go his shitty college, he is reminded that his parents ruined his gap year and fights with them every morning. His parents have also agreed to go no contact with him after his graduation.

Apart from this, he is suffering from early onset of Male Pattern Baldness. His hairline has receded and he's extremely insecure. He always wears a cap 24/7 outside. He never goes outside other than college due to this insecurity. When I video call him, he is constantly trying to fix his hair. CONSTANTLY for hours.

Because God is so important to him, he made getting his hair back his new "reason to live." He started finasteride and minoxidil and believes that if his hair improves, it will prove to him that God still cares about him and that his life can get better.

He's facing side effects of this medicine like lower libido, weaker erection etc. But he says hair is more important.

But it's been a few months and he doesn't see much improvement. And that's making him more s*icidal. He couldn't achieve another aim, and now he doesn't find life worth living.

I've tried a lot to make him go to therapy but he's too stubborn. He says he doesn't have enough energy left to go to therapy / try to make his life better. He will only feel energetic if his goal (of getting hair back) is achieved.

He says the only reason he hasn't unalived himself yet is because it takes too much dedication and energy.

What should I do?? I'm really concerned :(

Pls excuse my English, it's my second language

Slightly long post. Thanks for the patience

My best friend (21M) is depressed and sui*ical. Let's call him S. His dad always used to beat him up as kid. And S always felt like his mom loved his cousin more. She always compared him to his cousin, and S used to work hard in school to get his mom's validation.

But depression started when he was 18. It was his gap year for college entrance exam.

For context: We're from India and these college exams are not just for ambitious but for survival. They're too competitive, and taking a gap year means the pressure is insanely high. Every year many students unalive themselves due to these. 1.2 million participate and only top 30K get good colleges. You HAVE to study 7-10 hours daily in gap year to make it.

S has this habit of making goals and becoming insanely devoted to them. Complete tunnel-vision. He says if he is able to achieve his goal, it'll show him that his life is worth living, that God cares about him. He made getting into the top colleges his dream.

But his mom didn't take his dearer-than-life dream seriously. She always used to do things that disturbed his studies when the stakes were already too high. S used to cry and beg her to stop and let him study but she ignored his requests.

He says he felt abandoned by his parents and God. They never listened to him and he felt like he was shouting into a void. But despite all this, he had to stay strong and study constantly. He used to watch them enjoy festivals without even asking him to join, because they thought he was just a sourpuss. He felt unloved and isolated.

He eventually failed the exam, and ended up at a college he hates. Every single day he wakes up and wants to kill himself. Every morning , when he has to go his shitty college, he is reminded that his parents ruined his gap year and fights with them every morning. His parents have also agreed to go no contact with him after his graduation.

Apart from this, he is suffering from early onset of Male Pattern Baldness. His hairline has receded and he's extremely insecure. He always wears a cap 24/7 outside. He never goes outside other than college due to this insecurity. When I video call him, he is constantly trying to fix his hair. CONSTANTLY for hours.

Because God is so important to him, he made getting his hair back his new "reason to live." He started finasteride and minoxidil and believes that if his hair improves, it will prove to him that God still cares about him and that his life can get better.

He's facing side effects of this medicine like lower libido, weaker erection etc. But he says hair is more important.

But it's been a few months and he doesn't see much improvement. And that's making him more s*icidal. He couldn't achieve another aim, and now he doesn't find life worth living.

I've tried a lot to make him go to therapy but he's too stubborn. He says he doesn't have enough energy left to go to therapy / try to make his life better. He will only feel energetic if his goal (of getting hair back) is achieved.

He says the only reason he hasn't unalived himself yet is because it takes too much dedication and energy.

What should I do?? I'm really concerned :(

Pls excuse my English, it's my second language

Slightly long post. Thanks for the patience

My best friend (21M) is depressed and sui*ical. Let's call him S. His dad always used to beat him up as kid. And S always felt like his mom loved his cousin more. She always compared him to his cousin, and S used to work hard in school to get his mom's validation.

But depression started when he was 18. It was his gap year for college entrance exam.

For context: We're from India and these college exams are not just for ambitious but for survival. They're too competitive, and taking a gap year means the pressure is insanely high. Every year many students unalive themselves due to these. 1.2 million participate and only top 30K get good colleges. You HAVE to study 7-10 hours daily in gap year to make it.

S has this habit of making goals and becoming insanely devoted to them. Complete tunnel-vision. He says if he is able to achieve his goal, it'll show him that his life is worth living, that God cares about him. He made getting into the top colleges his dream.

But his mom didn't take his dearer-than-life dream seriously. She always used to do things that disturbed his studies when the stakes were already too high. S used to cry and beg her to stop and let him study but she ignored his requests.

He says he felt abandoned by his parents and God. They never listened to him and he felt like he was shouting into a void. But despite all this, he had to stay strong and study constantly. He used to watch them enjoy festivals without even asking him to join, because they thought he was just a sourpuss. He felt unloved and isolated.

He eventually failed the exam, and ended up at a college he hates. Every single day he wakes up and wants to kill himself. Every morning , when he has to go his shitty college, he is reminded that his parents ruined his gap year and fights with them every morning. His parents have also agreed to go no contact with him after his graduation.

Apart from this, he is suffering from early onset of Male Pattern Baldness. His hairline has receded and he's extremely insecure. He always wears a cap 24/7 outside. He never goes outside other than college due to this insecurity. When I video call him, he is constantly trying to fix his hair. CONSTANTLY for hours.

Because God is so important to him, he made getting his hair back his new "reason to live." He started finasteride and minoxidil and believes that if his hair improves, it will prove to him that God still cares about him and that his life can get better.

He's facing side effects of this medicine like lower libido, weaker erection etc. But he says hair is more important.

But it's been a few months and he doesn't see much improvement. And that's making him more s*icidal. He couldn't achieve another aim, and now he doesn't find life worth living.

I've tried a lot to make him go to therapy but he's too stubborn. He says he doesn't have enough energy left to go to therapy / try to make his life better. He will only feel energetic if his goal (of getting hair back) is achieved.

He says the only reason he hasn't unalived himself yet is because it takes too much dedication and energy.

What should I do?? I'm really concerned :(

Pls excuse my English, it's my second language

If you really want to help, you'll have to read the whole post. Thanks for the patience

My best friend (21M) is depressed and sui*ical. Let's call him S. His dad always used to beat him up as kid. And S always felt like his mom loved his cousin more. She always compared him to his cousin, and S used to work hard in school to get his mom's validation.

But depression started when he was 18. It was his gap year for college entrance exam.

For context: We're from India and these college exams are not just for ambitious but for survival. They're too competitive, and taking a gap year means the pressure is insanely high. Every year many students unalive themselves due to these. 1.2 million participate and only top 30K get good colleges. You HAVE to study 7-10 hours daily in gap year to make it.

S has this habit of making goals and becoming insanely devoted to them. Complete tunnel-vision. He says if he is able to achieve his goal, it'll show him that his life is worth living, that God cares about him. He made getting into the top colleges his dream.

But his mom didn't take his dearer-than-life dream seriously. She always used to do things that disturbed his studies when the stakes were already too high. S used to cry and beg her to stop and let him study but she ignored his requests.

He says he felt abandoned by his parents and God. They never listened to him and he felt like he was shouting into a void. But despite all this, he had to stay strong and study constantly. He used to watch them enjoy festivals without even asking him to join, because they thought he was just a sourpuss. He felt unloved and isolated.

He eventually failed the exam, and ended up at a college he hates. Every single day he wakes up and wants to kill himself. Every morning , when he has to go his shitty college, he is reminded that his parents ruined his gap year and fights with them every morning. His parents have also agreed to go no contact with him after his graduation.

Apart from this, he is suffering from early onset of Male Pattern Baldness. His hairline has receded and he's extremely insecure. He always wears a cap 24/7 outside. He never goes outside other than college due to this insecurity. When I video call him, he is constantly trying to fix his hair. CONSTANTLY for hours.

Because God is so important to him, he made getting his hair back his new "reason to live." He started finasteride and minoxidil and believes that if his hair improves, it will prove to him that God still cares about him and that his life can get better.

He's facing side effects of this medicine like lower libido, weaker erection etc. But he says hair is more important.

But it's been a few months and he doesn't see much improvement. And that's making him more s*icidal. He couldn't achieve another aim, and now he doesn't find life worth living.

I've tried a lot to make him go to therapy but he's too stubborn. He says he doesn't have enough energy left to go to therapy / try to make his life better. He will only feel energetic if his goal (of getting hair back) is achieved.

He says the only reason he hasn't unalived himself yet is because it takes too much dedication and energy.

What should I do?? I'm really concerned :(

Pls excuse my English, it's my second language

So suppose you got your desired college in Round 1, and freeze it.

You have to report physically to college within 48 hours of freezing, right? Do we have to pay tuition fee when we visit physically? When exactly do we have to pay tuition fee?

And if, after freezing and paying tuition fee, you want to cancel your admission. Will you get refund?

I hate Andy at all points of the show, but you know what, at least he was realistic in the beginning. There's always an Andy-like kiss up in every office, so even tho he was annoying, I found him really relatable and funny.

The episode where Michael hides from Andy and misses Dwight is one of my favourite. Andy was great as an annoying side character who represented a lot of real people.

But then they started give him a lot more screentime and tried to make him likeable. And his character was SOOO inconsistent. I mean, Stamford Andy, manager Andy, post boat trip Andy are COMPLETELY different people.

I hate how much screentime was given to the Andy and Erin romance, it felt like they tried to make it another Jim and Pam. They looked so forced together.

I just wish Andy had stayed a small annoying side character, instead of becoming such a big major character, with so much screentime. I can't bear watching a second of him.

Erin is a brilliant character, but she was dulled by Andy. How relieved I felt when they paired Erin with Plop. They make so much more sense together.

A friend asked me to look for him. He's 21, in Delhi, and wants therapy for severe Depression.

Offline is preferred, but online is also fine. If you're a student doing Masters, you have some reviews , then you can also help.

Want under ₹400 per session.

Suffering from severe depression . Need under ₹500 therapy, can't afford more than that.

Offline online both are fine

How is MyRafiky platform? Any other websites you know about? Any pro bono services??

It's urgent

My ex made me realize that I'm an incel.

Depression at the age of 12 made me extremely isolated with lots of social anxiety and a deep deep fear of vulnerability.

I want to be friendly, but my lack of confidence to approach men stops me.

So instead, when I see other women easily being friendly with men, I get jealous and start seeing them as wh0res.

My ex was a lonely guy (and we were in a long distance relationship) and whenever girls of his class tried to approach him to make him feel included, I got extremely jealous and always said that those girls were trying to date him, and that they only approached him because he looked good, that they would never approach a less attractive guy.

I was jealous because I don't have the confidence to approach any guy and be friendly and make him feel included.

Everyone around sees me as an antisocial weirdo, but I'm a very sensitive person who wants to be kind.

I need help with this, I want to change. I hate who I am right now. I've tried writing things down to understand my patterns

I'm willing to try conversations on text but IRL still can't approach any men without thinking of myself as a vamp/coquette for just being friendly with them. I'm afraid others will see me as characterless if I become friendly with men. (IK this is false, but it's hardcoded into my brain)

I (21F) don't know if this belongs here. But my ex made me realize that I'm an incel.

Depression at the age of 12 made me extremely isolated with lots of social anxiety and a deep deep fear of vulnerability.

I want to be friendly, but my lack of confidence to approach men stops me.

So instead, when I see other women easily being friendly with men, I get jealous and start seeing them as wh0res.

My ex was a lonely guy (and we were in a long distance relationship) and whenever girls of his class tried to approach him to make him feel included, I got extremely jealous and always said that those girls were trying to date him, and that they only approached him because he looked good, that they would never approach a less attractive guy.

I was jealous because I don't have the confidence to approach any guy and be friendly and make him feel included.

Everyone around sees me as an antisocial weirdo, but I'm a very sensitive person who wants to be kind.

Please help, I want to change. I hate who I am right now