u/girlboss1281

I’m posting this because I genuinely want a cultural and spiritual perspective, especially from people who understand beliefs around jinn, black magic, or spiritual interference. I’m not trying to claim anything as fact, I’m just trying to understand how people interpret situations like this.

I come from an Afghan Muslim background but I personally am not religious and I usually approach life in a very rational way. I’ve never believed in things like black magic or spiritual influence.

Recently I went through a very intense breakup. My boyfriend developed severe depression and suddenly ended the relationship and withdrew completely from my life. It was very abrupt and emotionally devastating for me, and I’ve been struggling a lot since then.

Around the same time, there has also been ongoing family pressure around an arranged marriage proposal within my extended family, which I have repeatedly رفضed.

What is making me question things is that in my family environment, these events are being connected in a very different way. Some relatives believe that spiritual interference, jealousy or black magic could be involved, and there have been conversations about possible family conflict and harmful intentions from certain individuals.

There were also mentions of strange symbolic objects and beliefs connected to certain family members, which added to the overall tension and confusion in my family.

I personally do not know how to interpret any of this. Part of me sees it as coincidence, psychological stress and cultural interpretation of unrelated events. Another part of me is struggling because everyone around me is framing it in a spiritual context.

I would really like to understand how people who believe in jinn or spiritual influence would interpret something like this, and how they distinguish between coincidence, mental health issues and actual spiritual interference.

I’m not asking for certainty, just perspective from people who are familiar with these beliefs.

I don’t know if this is the right community, but I try my luck.

I genuinely don’t know what to think anymore and I need outside opinions because this whole situation feels insane.

I’m 24, from an Afghan family, raised Muslim, but I’m personally not religious at all. I’ve always been a very logical person. I stopped believing in religion really young because I just couldn’t connect to it and I’ve always tried to approach life rationally. Stuff like black magic, evil eye, spiritual attacks and all of that always sounded ridiculous to me whenever my family talked about it.

About 2 or 3 weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me completely out of nowhere. We weren’t toxic, we weren’t constantly fighting, nothing like that. He became severely depressed. Like genuinely mentally unwell. He had to start therapy, got put on antidepressants and even moved in with his married sister because he couldn’t function alone anymore.

From one day to the next he completely shut down emotionally. He stopped wanting the relationship, stopped talking to me and basically disappeared from my life entirely.

I’ve been completely broken ever since. And I mean genuinely broken. I’ve had breakups before but this one drained every bit of life out of me. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t get out of bed, couldn’t function. I’ve basically just been lying in bed for weeks trying to survive and watching breakup advice videos trying to cope somehow.

Now this is where things start getting weird.

There’s this woman in my extended family, technically my dad’s cousin, who has a son and has been trying for months to get me to marry him. I know this probably sounds strange to non-Afghans but in Afghan culture this stuff is pretty common. The weird thing is that ever since they started seriously pushing for this marriage, my boyfriend’s mental health started getting worse and worse.

I never connected those things before. Ever.

But today my parents had a massive fight because apparently this family tried AGAIN for the fourth time to come ask for my hand even after I rejected them multiple times.

Then my mom told me things I had literally never heard before.

Apparently months ago my parents were at my uncle’s house and found bizarre stuff hidden in the basement. Skulls, weird symbols in paintings, pictures of demonic-looking things. My mom even said she saw symbols that looked similar to a Star of David which confused her because they’re Muslim too. My dad confronted my uncle and he basically brushed it off and said it belonged to his wife and told him to leave it alone.

The uncle where they found all this stuff is apparently very close to the same cousin whose son wants to marry me.

Then my mom told me something else that completely messed with my head.

A week ago, because she was worried about how broken I’ve become after this breakup, she secretly drove to another city to speak to a religious woman. She asked her what was wrong with me because I suddenly became emotionally lifeless after the breakup.

And according to my mom, the woman immediately told her to stay away from a specific man in our family because he had helped another woman “separate” me and my boyfriend so her son could marry me instead.

I KNOW how insane this sounds. Trust me. If I read this post written by someone else I’d probably think they were losing it too.

But I’m honestly shaken because I’ve never been exposed to this kind of thinking before. I built my life completely differently from my family. I’m not religious, I go to university, I’ve always been independent, I openly had a boyfriend even though that’s considered a huge taboo in my culture. I’ve always rejected this entire worldview.

So now my brain is stuck between thinking this is all just coincidence and grief making everyone irrational or wondering what the hell is actually going on.

I honestly don’t even know what I’m asking for here. Maybe perspective. Maybe someone from a similar cultural background who understands this kind of situation.

I just feel deeply disturbed and emotionally exhausted.

I am severely addicted to weed and I feel like there are so many reasons why. One day I tell myself I’ll quit and the next day I literally cannot stop. It feels impossible. It’s so addictive to me because it genuinely feels like my best friend. It fills a void and makes getting through the day easier.

Sometimes I just sit in my car waiting for the hours to pass because I just want the day to end. I wake up in the morning and genuinely don’t know how to get through another day sober. I’ve also been through a breakup recently and I noticed that when I was in a relationship, I barely felt the need to smoke. So I think loneliness is a huge part of why I’m addicted.

And the weird thing is, I still have friends. But I don’t really enjoy spending time with them that much. Having a partner and having that deep emotional connection honestly resembles weed to me in a strange way. Both make me feel calm. Safe. Present. Like I can finally breathe.

For me, weed was never really about “fun”. It just makes life feel bearable. Without it, I feel this unbearable emptiness. With it, I can just exist and be okay. I can sit in silence, listen to music, eat something, think about life, and hours pass by peacefully. Without it, being alone with my thoughts feels unbearable. I can’t cope with them.

The craziest thing is that weed used to make me lazy, but now I almost need it to function. When I’m high, I become more idealistic, more hopeful, more motivated. I think positively about my future. I’m more motivated to study, work, go to the gym, and actually do something with my life. Without it, I feel insecure, numb, and disconnected from life. Weed gives me confidence, motivation, energy, peace. Without it, life feels pale. Like I’m just surviving the day. But with it, I actually feel alive. Like I’m really living and present in the moment.

And every time I’m high, I think:
“How do I become THIS version of myself without weed?”
Because I want these thoughts and feelings sober. I want to feel connected to life naturally. But no matter what I do, I can’t get there.

I still go to the gym. I still study. I still work. I still try to maintain routines. But then my little friend Mary Jane is there and I think:
“Fuck, man… I need you. You make all of this bearable. You make life have color.”

It’s 9 PM right now and I’m sitting on my bed debating whether I should go smoke or not because staying sober tonight feels empty. If I smoke, suddenly I can enjoy the silence, music, food, my own thoughts. Without it I just sit there feeling restless and trapped in my own mind.

I’m only 24 and I’ve been hiding this for years. My friends don’t know. My parents don’t know. None of my romantic partners knew. I kept it completely secret because I know people’s perception of me would instantly change if they knew I smoke almost every day. Suddenly every flaw or mistake would be blamed on weed.

And honestly I don’t even know anymore if weed is destroying my life or saving me from myself.

Repost from the NevilleGoddard Community because it got deleted.

I don’t even know how to explain this properly but I feel like I completely lost myself. I was in a relationship that felt unreal in the best way, really deep, really intense, the kind where you both keep saying you can’t believe you found each other. We always said that, that we’ve never experienced something like this before, that it actually means something. I’ve always believed in manifesting, especially Neville Goddard, and I was fully living in the end with him. For me he wasn’t just my boyfriend, he was already my husband in my head and heart. I told him that a lot, like it’s already done and the rest will just unfold. And he loved hearing that. He made me feel like I was everything to him. He was so caring, always checking on me, making sure I’m okay, bringing me food, holding me, always close to me. I’ve never felt that kind of love and safety before.

But at the same time he was always scared. He would say things like we don’t know what’s going to happen, we shouldn’t think too much about the future, we have to be careful. I was always the one who believed in us completely, and he was the one who had fear in the background.

Then everything changed because he’s been really struggling mentally lately and feels like he lost himself. He told me he feels like he lost himself, his direction, his future. His job, his studies, everything kind of collapsed for him and he feels like he has to start from zero again. And because of that he said he can’t be in a relationship right now, that he needs to be alone to get back into life. So it wasn’t just a random breakup, it came from him being mentally not okay anymore.

What broke me the most is what he said after. He told me that if it’s meant to be, we will find each other again when he’s healthy. But at the same time he said he doesn’t know who he will be by then, what kind of person he will become, what his life goals will be, and that it could be possible that he would want to meet someone else and that maybe we wouldn’t even match anymore. That completely shattered my reality.

Because how can something feel so real, so deep, so aligned, and then suddenly turn into “maybe”, “I don’t know”, “maybe someone else”? I don’t understand how someone can love you like that and then not be sure about you anymore.

Right now I feel like I can’t even manifest properly anymore. My mind is all over the place, I feel blocked, and honestly it feels like he became the resistance. At the same time I keep questioning everything… was I living too much in the end? Was that too much pressure for him? Was this meant to happen? Or did I somehow create this without realizing?

I’ve never been in this much pain in my life. It literally feels like my whole reality collapsed. I didn’t just lose him, I lost the entire future I already saw and believed in with him.

Has anyone experienced something like this, especially from a Neville perspective? When one person fully believes and the other one is full of fear, and then everything falls apart like this? I just want to understand what this is and how to deal with it, because right now I feel completely lost.

I try to have positive thoughts and meditate, but my heart aches so bad that I can’t focus on anything. It’s been 9 days since then.

I don’t even know how to explain this properly but I feel like I completely lost myself. I was in a relationship that felt unreal in the best way, really deep, really intense, the kind where you both keep saying you can’t believe you found each other. We always said that, that we’ve never experienced something like this before, that it actually means something. I’ve always believed in manifesting, especially Neville Goddard, and I was fully living in the end with him. For me he wasn’t just my boyfriend, he was already my husband in my head and heart. I told him that a lot, like it’s already done and the rest will just unfold. And he loved hearing that. He made me feel like I was everything to him. He was so caring, always checking on me, making sure I’m okay, bringing me food, holding me, always close to me. I’ve never felt that kind of love and safety before.

But at the same time he was always scared. He would say things like we don’t know what’s going to happen, we shouldn’t think too much about the future, we have to be careful. I was always the one who believed in us completely, and he was the one who had fear in the background.

Then everything changed because he’s been really struggling mentally lately and feels like he lost himself. He told me he feels like he lost himself, his direction, his future. His job, his studies, everything kind of collapsed for him and he feels like he has to start from zero again. And because of that he said he can’t be in a relationship right now, that he needs to be alone to get back into life. So it wasn’t just a random breakup, it came from him being mentally not okay anymore.

What broke me the most is what he said after. He told me that if it’s meant to be, we will find each other again when he’s healthy. But at the same time he said he doesn’t know who he will be by then, what kind of person he will become, what his life goals will be, and that it could be possible that he would want to meet someone else and that maybe we wouldn’t even match anymore. That completely shattered my reality.

Because how can something feel so real, so deep, so aligned, and then suddenly turn into “maybe”, “I don’t know”, “maybe someone else”? I don’t understand how someone can love you like that and then not be sure about you anymore.

Right now I feel like I can’t even manifest properly anymore. My mind is all over the place, I feel blocked, and honestly it feels like he became the resistance. At the same time I keep questioning everything… was I living too much in the end? Was that too much pressure for him? Was this meant to happen? Or did I somehow create this without realizing?

I’ve never been in this much pain in my life. It literally feels like my whole reality collapsed. I didn’t just lose him, I lost the entire future I already saw and believed in with him.

Has anyone experienced something like this, especially from a Neville perspective? When one person fully believes and the other one is full of fear, and then everything falls apart like this? I just want to understand what this is and how to deal with it, because right now I feel completely lost.

Hey
I am going through a rough breakup. I have never experienced this kind of pain before, not with my other breakups and not when someone close died. This hits really hard. I love this man with all of my heart. He was the most amazing human being on earth and part of me started to believe in faith because what we had was too beautiful just to be a coincidence. The love was so intense and joyful.

He got really depressed and ended it because he had no capacity to even eat or think about the next day. He doesn’t know when he gets healthy again but he didn’t want me to go through this.
I begged and tried to change his mind, but he believes I deserve better. He told me I don’t have to wait for him, because he doesn’t know what type of person he will become and if he will ever function agains as a human.
He said he still loves me with all of his heart and I am the best thing that has ever happened to him, but he needs to go through this alone.

It is still surreal and I never expected this to happen. I have to be honest that I am a person who sometimes imagines the worst situations when I am dozing off. I recount many times where I was daydreaming about a hurtful breakup between us too and that if it ended I would experience a disturbing pain. Here we are. Part of me believes I also caused this.

I don’t know what to do next. I am scared of getting invested in the Law again and not being able to move on. Part of me can’t just accept that it ended and that I have to do something to be back with him.
I don’t know if it’s something I brought upon myself and need to fix now or if I should try to move on because I am scared of becoming obsessed and desperate.

My boyfriend just left me today. I still don’t believe it. I can’t believe it. I am sitting here for 6 hours now in my car and keep repeating to myself that I don’t believe it.

He has been struggling a lot lately. It started about 2 months ago when he was diagnosed with burn out and had to leave his job and stop writing his thesis for his degree. He felt like a loser and a disappointment. He grew up really strict and put high expectations on him daily. His job was extremely demanding where he had to travel every week to another city (+8 hours away). He had worked hard for the job so quitting wasn’t an option for him. Now he feels like he lost all his opportunities and failed in life because he couldn’t get his degree yet. He did not fail, but he just left everything because he couldn’t handle the stress anymore. He was troubled and tried to ignore his emotions and thoughts until it was too late. One month goes by and he started feeling better because he got away from everything. He was starting therapy and got antidepressants and heavy sleeping pills because his thoughts kept him up at night.

I knew things would change. As soon as I knew that he started medication I knew that he would be more numb.

Today he was so numb. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore even though I was the love of his life and he would probably never find someone like me again. I just couldn’t understand. I told him I don’t need much attention and I just want to be by his side but he told me that he feels terrible because he can’t give me what I deserve. So he left. I was never this much in love with a man. 3 weeks ago we talked about how much better he feels and how happy we are to have each other. 1 1/2 weeks ago he spiraled back into a hole and I didn’t hear much from him. And now this. It feels so hard.

I can’t be mad at him and I have no reason to hate him. We were best friends and sometimes couldn’t believe we found each other. I just can’t believe he just ended it like that. I feel so confused and it is harder to move on when I know that he still loves me and breaks up because of the guilt that he can’t give me what I deserve. I don’t know how to move on because part of me just wishes he comes back and has gotten better. But another part of me feels so abandoned and scared how easily someone just says their goodbyes to me when we were talking about our future kids just 3 weeks ago.

I know I am emotional. I know that I just need to move on and accept. But I am sitting here and I just can’t believe he is gone.