u/hellvpr

The topic came up when I was walking to the convenience store with my friend when I smelled something dead. Both of us smelled it and I said, "It's probably just a dead animal right?" He said it definitely was because dead humans smell much worse. He said it was the worst thing he's ever smelled, saying it was like a mix of sulphur, rotting flesh, and excrement.

My friend is ex-military so he knows about that sort of thing. I trust his what he says on that. That being said, why do dead humans smell worse than dead animals? Is it because of our diet or something else?

It doesn't. As a matter of fact it gets fucking worse. I hate it here, it's just like High School: Extended Edition, but make it worse.

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The sorority girls in my college are especially awful. I am sick and tired of being bullied and judged by these girls just for fucking existing.

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I was riding my bike when I realized the reason I was having more trouble with it than usual was because my tires were deflating. Luckily I was already pretty close to my apartment so I walked it up to one of the benches out front and sat down because I was tired. Then I saw my neighbor come out with his roommates and a couple sorority girls. He walked over to me and asked if I was alright. I said I was good, but I had a flat tire.

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Then one of the girls who had been looking at me like I was a fucking space alien the whole time asked, "uuuhm are you stranded here? You don't look like you belong here." I get that a lot. I don't know what the hell it is with people from this town but people constantly tell me I don't look like I'm from here. I told her that truth. "No, I live here. Then she started whispering to her girl friend. I heard them giggling like I just said something really weird or stupid.

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My neighbor asked if there was anything he could do to help out and I figured I'd ask if he had a bike pump. That might seem weird but we know each other pretty well. I lent him my broom when he first moved in, and he's helped me get into my place when I accidentally locked myself out. Just typical neighbor shit.

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One of the girls looked at me like I'd just spoken a foreign language and said, "Bike...pump? What's she talking about?" And she and her friend went back to whispering to each other and laughing.

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Unfortunately he didn't have one but said there was a drug store down the street that might have one. They left but the girls were laughing and pointing at me until they got in their car.

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I have to deal with shit like this every fucking day on campus. It's been like this ever since I came here my first year back in 2024. It's always the sorority girls from California. We have a lot of transplants here from California. There are some people in this city who are pretty chill but not many of them go to my college. I mostly hang out with the city natives who have lived here their whole lives and don't have sticks up their ass, or college graduates like my neighbor who've chosen to stay in the area.

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Personally I can't wait until I graduate in '27 so I can blow this joint for good.

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Are pools and other swimming areas mostly just for show or something that only men like to use? I've started to wonder if I'm violating some unspoken social norm because when I go to the pool its mostly only guys who get in the water. The girls might stick their feet in occasionally but it seems like they almost never actually go in. Most of them just sit by the poolside (or beach, lake, whatever) and tan. I am starting to feel like a weirdo for just jumping in the water like a dude. I presented male most of my life. Due to my naturally more masculine appearance despite being afab I was kind of socialized as such. Now that I've started exploring my feminine side it seems like there's all these weird unspoken social rules girls have that guys don't and I'm starting to wonder if I'm breaking one because whenever I go in the water people, usually girls, give me a lot of funny looks like I'm doing something weird.

Ive been seeing this guy since the end of February and something odd happened while we were doing stuff. I was straddling him, trying to get him inside and when I sat down I felt this weird pop. Usually when we have sex he has trouble getting it in all the way even though I'm turned on. Penetration is easiest for me when we do cowgirl. When the pop happened he was suddenly all the way in. It didn't hurt or anything, but it was a bit odd and took a minute to get used to.

Afterwards he asked me if I was actually a virgin. I'm not, I've been with a couple other people (one male, one female) before but always had issues with penetration and it's only now that someone's been able to get it all the way in.

I asked him what it felt like on his end. He told me that Usually when we have sex he feels like he "hits a wall" when he's halfway in and can't go in any further but that this time he said it felt like some kind of valve opened up. What exactly happened here?

My period started last Monday and shows no signs of stopping. An eight day period might be normal for some people but not for me! Mine only lasts 3-4 days.

Its not just the length of it though. The thing that really freaks me out is just how much blood I'm losing. Mine are relatively light except for the second day. Evey day of this has been like the second day of my period on fucking steroids.I am quickly running out of supplies because I bleed through tampons in under an hour. I went through three maxi pads yesterday during my second class (which is two and a half hours long btw). I actually had to ask the girl in the stall next to me if she had anything and thank god she did because I brought extra but normally I don't need this many.

The other weird thing is how thin the blood is. Its thin and runny, and has a thinner consistency than blood from a vein. When I was in the shower last night I thought I cut myself shaving because of all the blood running down my legs but it wasn't a cut, it was period blood. I don't think I've ever seen so much blood come out of me. It's kind of scary.

The guy I'm seeing is worried it might be a miscarriage. Ive been talking to him about it and the last time we saw each other (about a day before the bloodbath started) , he said I felt really feverish when he was cuddling me and had me take a lukewarm shower to cool me down. I remember feeling pretty weak and out of it a few days before, way worse than the typical fatigue and cramps I'm used to. I'm talking about being so weak and dizzy this guy had to basically hold me up in the shower so I didn't fall over. I'm having even worse bouts of dizziness now, possibly due to iron deficiency, which I've had before.

The cramps are much worse than normal too. Im used to lethargy and moderate cramping, as well as the infamous period shits but this is a completely different thing. Normally all I have to do is take it easy for a few days, pop an ibuprofen or two and I'm able to go about my day pretty normally. This time though the cramps feel like im being stabbed. They radiate down from my abdomen to my thighs. It was so bad I almost puked in class last week the day it started. It worried my professor, who advised me to go home because apparently I was sweating and had gone pale.

I have been to a doctor. I went last week and told her about my symptoms during the followup for my pap. They said everything looked normal and that everything I was experiencing was normal. But this is not normal for me! Ive never seen anything like this and the sheer amount of blood im losing is freaking me out.

If so, could you tell me about your experience and if it would be possible for me to be approved for that? I had an unsuccessful spinal fusion surgery when I was 12. Normally they wait longer to do this sort of thing or so I was told but they were convinced I would never grow any taller than 4 ft 8, even though at that age I hadn't even started puberty yet. I'm currently 5 ft tall and if my spine was straight I would be 5'6. I grew almost a foot which is probably why the rods aren't working.

I also changed after the operation and sometimes I wonder if it was really necessary. There was no visible asymmetry in my body before the operation. I was on the swim team and in those pictures I look completely normal. After the operation the asymmetry was very noticeable. My hips and shoulders are noticeably uneven even with clothes on. Also, I had no pain or issues with mobility at all before the operation. I was very energetic, athletic and bright, with an eidetic memory. Post-op all of that disappeared.

I know that it's natural to be sluggish after the operation but I still feel like that years later. I used to be a morning person, now I have almost no energy at all. Even though I only weigh a hundred pounds, I tire easily because ever since the operation my limbs had this weird heavy feeling in them that never goes away.

I also developed chronic stomach issues afterwards. I know it's normal to throw up post off but I never stopped! I was in the hospital for 2 weeks due to complications with the catheter and having difficulty walking afterwards. Weeks after they finally let me go home I was still throwing up yellow stuff. My stomach constantly felt queasy. While I'm no longer vomiting yellow stuff, I still feel nauseous at least once a day, have to deal with stomach upsets at least once a week if not more, and that didn't used to happen. I don't necessarily know if the two are related but I did start having problems around the same time.

The pain never went away after my operation. They told me that I would deal with some pain now and again but this is on a whole other level. It's legitimately difficult for me to function. I have to really conserve my energy. Something as simple as going out to buy groceries really takes it out of me. I won't have any energy to do anything for the rest of the day. I find it difficult to work and attend college at the same time, because I am in constant pain and discomfort and it just wears me down. I should be working and studying after I get home from classes and instead I'm so tired by the time I finally get home I just pass out

Last time I went to a doctor for this they mentioned there's a lot of inflammation around where the rods are. Sometimes I wonder if my body is rejecting them but when I brought this up they said that's impossible because the rods are Harrington rods of titanium alloy and they say that you can't be allergic to that sort of metal.

However, it has been confirmed that I've outgrown them. I've met a few other people who had spinal fusion as young as me and most of those people had the rods replaced as they got older. If I can't have them removed, my definitely need replacing. That was what my first doctor said. However, I had to move and every doctor I've been to since has said that replacing them is too risky. I've been to three or four different ones.

Could those who have had the rods removed or replaced tell me a little bit about their experiences and if it would be possible for me to do something like that? My quality of life is terrible. I need to do something about this but I don't know what or how considering I've been to multiple doctors and they tell me that I just need to accept this as my new normal even though I can barely function at all.

I am losing my goddamn mind. It has been raining for 2 months straight. It's not ordinary rain I'm talking about buckets from the goddamn sky and winds so strong that an umbrella is useless because it'll get torn to shreds the second you step outside. All this in an area that doesn't normally get rain at all.

I have never been more bored in my entire life. I fucking hate being indoors. Weekends have gone from a chance to actually go out and do something to being the most depressing part of my life because all I get to do is sit inside in this stupid studio apartment that is starting to feel like a prison cell. I've come to really fucking hate this place.

I could go to the club, but then I risk running into a former friend of mine I can't talk to anymore because he's in a relationship. He still seems to want to be friends with me, because he does still talk to me but his boyfriend doesn't seem to happy about that.

The last time I was there was an incredibly awkward experience because every time I went to the bathroom his boyfriend was in the bathroom too. The last time I tried to talk to him face to face the guy was just staring me down like I shouldn't even be there so I've avoided him ever since.

Most of the other places I like to go in this city or outside and right now they're completely inaccessible to me. I want to dance, go swimming, hang out on the top of that great big hill, hike around town or do something! But I can't because of the goddamn rain. At this point I don't think it's ever going to stop. I don't think winter is ever going to turn into summer at this point because I am in Texas, it's flooding, and it's 40 fucking degrees outside on the 1st of May!

All I can do is hang out in my cramped studio apartment thats feeling more like a prison cell by the minute. All my friends are busy, the guy I've been seeing is at work. I worry that I've already sabotaged the relationship by looking needy because I actually reached out and called him today hoping he'd be able to hang out.

Because if I'm going to be stuck in this cramped hellhole for the foreseeable future, it would be somewhat more tolerable if I had somebody to spend some time with. Now I'm regretting that I ever called. He's still talking to me but I'm just afraid that I came off as desperate or clingy by reaching out at all.

My mom doesn't understand why I am so utterly miserable living like this. Unlike me she's a good proper Christian who doesn't like going outside or socializing. She's kind of a recluse who lives out in the middle of butt fuck nowhere and never goes outside and she's perfectly happy like that. She tried to force a similar lifestyle on me while I lived with her and never could understand why after months of being socially isolated, unable to leave the house, with nothing to do but read when I already read every book in the house at least five times over drove me fucking bonkers.

I'm a very active person. I'm not supposed to be cooped up inside. I don't know how other people fucking stand it. Shit, if it weren't for the fact that my respiratory system is so weak I go outside for a run right now at almost 10:00 at night but I don't want to get pneumonia again so I'm stuck here bored out of my fucking mind and unable to even watch TV because it hasn't turned on since there was a power outage a few days ago.

I am somebody who is used to being lusted after but never loved. I am 26 years old and I've never had a boyfriend. The closest I came to having that was somebody who wasted 2 years of my life and taught me everything about how men work. He was somebody who played himself off as this harmless nerdy sad boy type. Someone I never would have expected to be the biggest player I'd ever met.

He would talk to me at length about how he felt like he couldn't get a girlfriend, girls that didn't like him, yada yada. And I felt bad for him. I liked him too. We went to school together and knew each other for 7 years. Eventually he told me that he had a huge crush on me the whole time. We got together, that time long distance and we were long distance for about a year.

This guy essentially threw himself at me, talking about how he wanted to build a life with me, he thought I was his soulmate, kids, marriage, so on so forth. I thought he was actually serious about me.

Our whole relationship was fake. I am a trans guy and after I came out I had no one. All my friends and family were against that sort of thing for religious reasons. He was all I had left. I finally moved to his City and we were very happy for a few months. Then he started acting strangely. Pretending not to know me in front of his friends, disappearing in the middle of the night and not coming back until 6:00 in the morning reeking of alcohol, giving me the silent treatment for days on end, refusing to touch me at all and just acting like every room I was in with somehow contaminated. I don't think I've ever seen anybody look at me with so much hatred and disgust in my entire life.

I wondered if there was something going on but if I brought it up I got told I was delusional. Crazy. Controlling for asking why he kept disappearing in the middle of the night. He later told me that he lost all interest in me the moment I moved down there because the chase was over. I also found out he'd been sending naked pictures of himself to strangers online and sexting them and had a couple of one night stands while he was with me. And that was when it dawned on me: this is just how they work.

Because around that time I was dealing with a stalker. Some guy who had made my life hell all throughout high school and college by bullying me, spreading rumors about me, would sometimes push me off my bike into the goddamn road on my way to class, and vandalizing my shit, such as the time that sick fuck ejaculated on the handles of my bicycle. He had chased me across three different states. I hated him. I wanted nothing to do with him. I went out of my way to avoid him.

He later confronted me and told me that the entire reason he was such an asshole to me was because he was in love with me. He told me that the harder I tried to avoid him, the more I pushed him away, the more it made him fall for me. He told me he liked that I hated him and it only made him want to work harder to earn my interest.

I was dealing with this crap shortly before I got together with my ex. It didn't click in my brain then, but two years later in 2024 when my ex told me he lost interest in me because the chase was over, that was when I understood how relationships work.

After we broke up all this stuff started flooding my algorithm. Dating advice. Don't be honest about your intentions. Don't tell him you want a relationship. Lie and say you just want something casual because that'll make him pursue you. Ignore him, leave him on read for days on end, talk to other guys, act like he is the last person you want to be around.

That was when I realized why my relationship with my ex didn't work out. Because I wasn't like that. I treated him with the same warmth I did when we were friends instead of turning into a bitchy little ice queen. Of course you took me for granted. Of course he lost interest. Of course he lost respect for me. Of course he got bored when he knew that I liked him back and I now live 20 minutes away instead of 10 hours because there were no obstacles left for him to overcome.

I was stable, I was safe, direct, I didn't play any games with him His nervous system calmed down around me which kills passion faster than anything for men according to these dating gurus. No more vasopressin being released into his system, thus killing his attraction to me. With my disposition our relationship was doomed the moment my plane landed in fuck ass Austin.

And that is why men will always put me in the hookup zone rather than the relationship zone. I have been single for 2 years. I get approached constantly despite not being conventionally attractive. I thought I was ready to put myself out there again so instead of turning down the guys who approached me I started talking to them, trying to figure out just what it is they wanted. The answer is always the same: "I'm just looking for something casual" or "I don't want a relationship right now but we can fuck though". I'm just a lust object, nothing else.

Or sometimes I will run on to someone who seems genuinely interested and we spend a little time together. However I fall into the same trap. I'm not somebody who wants to sleep with someone right away when I start going out with them, but I'm not an ice queen either. I won't leave you on read for days or act like you're very existence gets on my nerves.

Then the person I'm seeing inevitably turns out to just want something casual and I'm pretty sure it's because when I actually like being around someone I act like it! If I like someone, I want to talk to them, I want to be around them. I don't stare at my phone all day waiting for them to reply but if I happen to have my phone in my hand and a message from them comes in, I'll reply probably in 1 to 5 minutes instead of making them wait for 6 hours or some bullshit like that like I'm supposed to. If they call and I hear my phone ring, I pick up instead of ignoring them.

If they bring up wanting to see each other and I don't have anything planned on that day, I go ahead with the plans instead of making up some excuse not to see them. When they talk to me, I'm genuinely interested in the conversation instead of staring at my phone , being bored out of my mind wishing I was literally anywhere else.

There isn't any uncertainty with me, which means there's no tension. How on Earth could a man stay interested in somebody he knows reciprocates his feelings? There are no obstacles for him to overcome other than me not wanting to sleep with him right away.

My problem is that I'm very direct with people. If I like being around someone, I will show visible signs of enjoying their company like some kind of pathetic moron with no social skills. If I don't like someone, I avoid them at all costs. I should be doing the opposite. For whatever reason, in order for somebody to love you, you must act like you don't like them at all.

For whatever reason, you pushing somebody away makes you irresistible, much like all the dating advice that was all over my feed. Apparently that's how this stuff works and I just don't have the patience or the intelligence for it. So it looks like I'm going to stay single for the rest of my life

I found out far too late into the relationship that my ex-boyfriend really looked down on me. He was sort of upper middle class. His parents paid for his college and everything. Meanwhile I was unable to attend college until I was older than most people are when they graduate because my parents would only pay my brother's tuition because in my family if you're not the eldest male child you're treated like a second class citizen. I had to go to a community college later in life and he thought I was a bum because of that.

When I first moves to the city I had a little trouble getting a job. None of the stores or restaurants in my area seemed to have any positions that needed filling. They were all fully staffed, none of them were hiring. Then I finally managed to get a job at a drug store and on my first day there I found out somebody stole my identity. I had to leave because this asshole was using my information to go on a whole ass shopping spree and my balance was going down by the minute despite me purchasing nothing more than a small coffee that day. I had to get it straightened out as soon as possible with the bank. They later fired me.

I can understand why. Having to leave early like that on the first day looks pretty bad. They also told me that they'd had employees steal from them in the past and they couldn't afford to take any risks. I get it.

This led to my ex boyfriend seeing me as a deadbeat loser even though I managed to get a job in another store less than a month later and managed to keep that position just fine.

This guy is miserable. Apparently he's been fired from multiple jobs since we split. And yet he thought I was the lazy one. It keeps happening over and over again and you think that with that going on he would look in the damn mirror. He treated his job just like he treated me: he would say one thing and do another, he made promises he couldn't keep, he would promise to show up and then simply not do that time after time.

Am I a top notch employee? No. I have a lot of health issues. I was out for 3 days this year because I had the flu and a stubborn 103° fever that just wouldn't go down. However, I did my best to make up for it and keep my boss in the loop. However, I've been working at this place for 2 years now and I haven't been fired. I know I'm going to sound like a complete tool saying this, but he calls me lazy, yet I've been here longer than he's been at any of his jobs. So he should think twice before blabbing to everybody I know about how lazy and useless I am.

I had a copper one put in two and a half weeks ago. Right after they put it in I broke out in a cold sweat then I felt okay for a few minutes while I was getting dressed but as soon as I finished I felt like I really had to go to the bathroom. I ran to the bathroom and ended up vomiting in the trash can while experiencing what can only be described as the worst period cramps of my life on steroids.

I threw up three times while waiting for my Uber and continued to vomit a few more times once I got home. They told me there would be some bleeding afterwards, but the bleeding I experienced was just as heavy as my period and lasted for nearly three days. It was so bad I had to do a rain check on an event I was supposed to go to with some friends that weekend.

I contacted my doctor and told her about my symptoms and they said this was normal. After day three I did feel pretty normal so I went about my normal routine. They said my pap smear which was done the same day came back completely normal so I know it doesn't have anything to do with that.

Then today when I was in the middle of one of my college classes I started having cramps so severe it was almost as bad is the day they put it in. When I was discussing my project one-on-one with the professor I was in so much pain I doubled over and almost had to leave early. I do experience some cramping during my actual period, but it's nowhere near this bad. This shit is on a whole other level and it took every last ounce of self-restraint I had to not fall out if my seat on the bus ride home because of the pain I was in.

I've been home for a couple hours now and the pain comes and goes but when it's here it's always really bad. It was so bad that when a couple of my friends stopped by this afternoon to hang out that I spent the whole time lying in bed hyperventilating because of how much pain I was in. I took two Ibuprofen and it's helping but only a little bit.

Does this mean that something's gone wrong with the IUD? My doctor said there would be pain and cramping for up to 6 weeks after installation but this is much worse than I was expecting.

I lived as a man for almost 10 years before I realized I was actually more non-binary. For the last year and a half I've been experimenting with more feminine presentation. I've also grown my hair out quite a bit. I enjoy presenting feminine but sometimes I want to look a bit more masculine. I still have a full wardrobe of men's clothes, but I don't know what to do with my hair. I kept it short for years but decided to let it grow out and now it's past my shoulder blades. I got a wolf cut back in November, which has grown out quite a bit. It looked pretty androgynous until I impulsively gave myself bangs a few months ago, a decision I'm kind of regretting. With the bangs, it looks pretty feminine. What can I do to make my hair look a bit more masculine or at least androgynous without cutting it?

I've been having a very difficult time lately because of some weird shit that's been going on. I am somewhat skeptical of things but in the past year I've experienced some really weird stuff that has shaken my understanding of reality.

In 2017, a person I had never met or seen before in my life started appearing in my dreams. I am leaving his physical description out of this in case his real-world equivalent finds this account.

He might have showed up in a few of them as early as 2011, but did not start appearing in them regularly until summer 2017. I really need to write down all of these dreams. In many of them, he was injured and I had to protect him or something. In others I saw the dream from his perspective and it was basically events from his life. In others we just spent time together talking and other things I would prefer not to mention here.

For years I dismissed this as possibly some sort of subconscious form of wish fulfillment. In the dreams he often insisted that he was real. Sometimes in the dreams we argued about it. At one point when I told him he wasn't a real person he said that once I moved out of my mom's house we'd meet in real life but that he might not remember me at first.

I dismissed all of this until I met somebody who is almost completely identical to him a few months ago. In the dreams, he mentioned there would be small physical differences but that he would otherwise be completely identical to how he showed up in the dreams. This person I met has his face. Every single facial feature is exactly the same. The only difference is the color of his eyes. I also expected him to be a bit shorter, but other than that he's a 99% visual match.

It is very difficult for me to interact with this man because the whole situation trips me out. Shit, I had a dream that predicted the exact circumstances of our meeting roughly a year before. This whole thing is a lot for me to process.

I first met him there was so much going on I didn't really get a good look at his face. It was easier to interact with him back then. I thought he was interesting so we exchanged contact information and met up sometimes. The second time I saw him though I got a better look at him and that was when I realize that aside from the color of his eyes he looked identical. I just can't get over the fact that he's an actual real person and not some figment of my imagination.

I won't go into detail, but his past has a few similarities as well. Such as places he's lived, certain events that happened in his life, certain personality traits, how he dresses, family circumstances and so on.

I don't think this guy enjoys being around me at all. The reason I think that is because a lot of the time I'm the one who initiates the conversation. Sometimes he does it but it's not often. When we do, we usually have a pretty good talk but I really don't like having to reach out to other people because it makes me feel pathetic.

It's even more difficult to be around him because ever since I met him the dreams have been happening more. I've been trying to distance myself from him because I don't know how to deal with it and it seems like the more I distance myself from this guy the more he shows up in my life. I don't know what's going on here but it's really weird and I don't know how to deal with it. Can someone please talk to me about this?

Female toplessness is legal in my city. It's not something I've ever done until recently because I have severe scoliosis and it's sort of ruined the upper half of my body. I know no one wants to see that.

I did it yesterday though just because it got so bloody hot! I was hanging out in the woods with a friend in the park and found out my midwestern ass doesn't tolerate the heat very well. A few others had removed their tops as well. My shirt was already drenched in sweat which made the entire experience even more unpleasant, so I took mine off too. I was sort of nervous but it was far too hot for me to care that much. I felt much better after it was off.

Then I had to leave our spot to go get something and these two old guys laughed at me. On my way back I overheard a couple women whispering about women sexualizing themselves.

I didn't do this to show off my body or to be sexual. It was just really hot outside. I'm prone enough to heat exhaustion already. Most of the time I wear an undershirt or a back brace under my clothes but I just couldn't do it that day man.

Maybe it's just because I'm only attracted to women once in a blue moon but I don't really see breasts as inherently sexual. It's just another part of the body to me. But whatever.