u/manthrk

I'm 7 weeks 5 days pregnant with baby #2. With my first, I was so sick during my first trimester and I lost 5 pounds. Then I gained 65 over the next 2 😳. Lost 40 in 2 weeks postpartum and then another 10 by my 6 week appointment. The last 10 I lost very slowly lost right up until I conceived this little bean.

Well now I'm in the first trimester trenches again, but somehow I'm rapidly gaining weight. I have gained 8 pounds in the less than 5 weeks since my positive test. I'm eating so many carbs because it's all that helps with the nausea. At this rate I'm going to be up at least 15 pounds by the end of the first trimester. I'm hoping if that's the case that I maybe somehow don't gain another 65 like the first time around.

Like I didn't have gestational diabetes or anything but I still had a nearly 10 pound baby and that was not ideal. And I was so physically uncomfortable being that large during most of my 3rd trimester. I'm scared I'm going to be even bigger this time. Just looking for any hopeful anecdotes you might have.

Edit: I am now permanently banned from the sleep training sub. That's probably for the best.

Idk if this is allowed and I'm sorry if it's not. You can just delete it if I'm breaking rules.

I am a member of both this sub and the sleep training sub. I'm not passionately against gentle sleep training or even Ferber type methods if the parent's mental health is in such a poor place that it's that or something much worse. I'm just a more middle ground person. I have done crib soothing, pick up put down, and cosleeping with my daughter. Really just whatever seems right in the moment while responding to her needs. I don't think I messed up her attachment nor did I cause her sleep issues. She is a toddler who sleeps fine now and is confident and very securely attached.

Anyway, any time at all that I say something in that sub that isn't passionately pro-CIO, a mod will reply something snarky that can be easily refuted. But when I go to reply to them, the post is locked. There's just zero space for a respectful discussion in that sub. I don't go posting horrible things about sleep training. I'm making very reasonable posts and comments but I have never once been able to reply to a mod. It's always immediately locked. It's so bizarre and insecure.

20 months old. 3 independent pees on the potty - one first thing in AM, one right after nap, and one right after her bedtime bath. 2 mid-stream transfers, and 1 mid-poop transfer (though the poop landed outside the potty...we still gave her credit though). I feel like overall it was honestly a fantastic first day, but there have been a few struggles...

• She is obsessed with washing her hands. She keeps going into the bathroom and climbing her step stool and throwing tantrums because she can't wash her hands (we are only doing it after she potties in the potty even a little bit and then dumps it into the toilet). She also has been sitting on the potty for 2 seconds and then singing the Daniel Tiger jingle and asking to "flush and wash" even though there's nothing in the potty. She's just very onto that part of the potty training routine.

• She has been getting freaked out by the mid-stream transfers. Most of my attempts have led to her kind of freaking out and refusing to sit on the potty and finish. I'm tempted to pivot in the direction of just not doing it unless she is literally inches from the potty. I don't want to create an aversion. And I feel like she understands the goal. She's done the 3 unprompted pees and also she said "oh no pee pee on floor" and once when I reminded her where her potty was to go pee or poo she said "potty. not on floor". So I feel like she already has that connection. I don't want to do overkill and traumatize her. Thoughts?

I lost about 20 pounds this year. I would like to lose 5-10 more. In the past 2-3 weeks I feel like I have lost control and I'm overeating most days. I'm occasionally binge eating but mostly just overeating at least slightly more days than not. I am certain I am eating above maintenance calories most days and I'm not far below maintenance on my "good" days. Yet by some miracle I have not gained any weight. I don't understand it.

Daughter is 20 months old. I don't really have strong feelings about getting her out of diapers yet. However she has excellent verbal skills. She often tells me when she has to potty, we own a little potty, and she sits on it often (usually with clothes) especially when I'm using the toilet. She has peed in it once and pooped in it once. She can help pull her pants up. She's still in diapers though so IDK how pull ups or underwear would work. And she's still a pretty chill and eager to please kid. Not an overly stubborn like "terrible twos" toddler yet by any means. I don't want to pressure her to potty train before she is ready and like stress her out and cause some sort of complex. I genuinely don't mind diapers. I could do it for another year or 2 genuinely. But if this is some magical perfect window to get it done, I also don't want to miss out on the opportunity and have it be way harder later potentially. I have an upcoming very long stretch off work (14 days) a little before she turns 21 months. A low key cabin trip and a couple little family parties are thrown in the mix but I don't think any of that would hinder potty training. Like the cabin trip we could keep her without her diaper and have the potty nearby or whatever. And the family parties she would wear a diaper for 2-3 hours on 2 different days so hopefully that wouldn't be detrimental. Overall it'll primarily be a staycation. I was thinking we could try? But I'm just not sure if she's way too little.

Daughter is 20 months old. I don't really have strong feelings about getting her out of diapers yet. However she has excellent verbal skills. She often tells me when she has to potty, we own a little potty, and she sits on it often (usually with clothes) especially when I'm using the toilet. She has peed in it once and pooped in it once. She can help pull her pants up. She's still in diapers though so IDK how pull ups or underwear would work. And she's still a pretty chill and eager to please kid. Not an overly stubborn like "terrible twos" toddler yet by any means. I don't want to pressure her to potty train before she is ready and like stress her out and cause some sort of complex. I genuinely don't mind diapers. I could do it for another year or 2 genuinely. But if this is some magical perfect window to get it done, I also don't want to miss out on the opportunity and have it be way harder later potentially. I have an upcoming very long stretch off work (14 days) a little before she turns 21 months. A low key cabin trip and a couple little family parties are thrown in the mix but I don't think any of that would hinder potty training. Like the cabin trip we could keep her without her diaper and have the potty nearby or whatever. And the family parties she would wear a diaper for 2-3 hours on 2 different days so hopefully that wouldn't be detrimental. Overall it'll primarily be a staycation. I was thinking we could try? But I'm just not sure if she's way too little.

She ate a pint of strawberries and some Cheerios today. Nothing else. When she refused dinner and I asked if there was anything she would like to eat, she requested more strawberries and some ketchup. I declined to give her the ketchup.

That's it. That's the question.

I'm sure I'm not alone in experiencing this scenario.. I go all day following my (reasonable, healthy, small calorie deficit) diet. I'm not starving or completely deprived, but at the end of the day I have a little craving. I think "oh future me wouldn't mind if I ate a small bowl of ice cream or chips or whatever. It's truly no big deal." Then one of the following scenarios occurs:

A. I eat the small snack and my calorie deficit for the day is basically gone. I want to eat more but I show restraint. Future me is not pleased but at least it isn't a binge.

B. I eat the small snack and the deficit is nearly gone. Then I think I've blown it. Then I binge because why not? What's 2,000 extra calories when I've already eaten 200 extra? The logic just doesn't logic. Future me is so angry and confused about why I would do such a thing. Option B happens way more frequently than option A I'm afraid.

C. I decide to skip the extra snack and just go to bed. The craving is gone by the time I've brushed my teeth. Future me is happy but still confused about why I ever thought it was a good idea to even think about extra snacks. I have a plan. It is nutritionally adequate and includes some more indulgent foods. I should be satisfied. I don't understand why I'm never satisfied.

Anyways option C played out today and I'm laying in bed and I don't understand how I was so close to a binge but I'm pleased to spend another day in a calorie deficit. I have lost 30 pounds so far and I have literally 9 left to go until I'm at my ideal goal weight. Now is not the time for self sabotage.

I'm 32 years old. I have 1 child and we would like to have one more. I just stopped the mini pill a few days ago after being on it for 1.5 years after having my daughter. Prior to having her, I was on a combination pill for about a decade before experimenting with the Natural Cycles app for a bit over a year before ultimately (intentionally) getting pregnant with her our first month trying. Now I'm using that app again to track my cycles and ideally get pregnant with #2 in the Fall, but if it happens a little sooner that's fine too.

I feel absolutely incredible already being off hormonal birth control. I feel like a fog is lifted. I have energy. A libido. Right now we're using condoms as well as tracking my cycles because we don't have enough data so all my days are currently "red" days. But this isn't ideal long term.

I'm trying to figure out what to do long term. I don't want to go back on the pill ever again. I'm getting older and I worry about long term health effects. Plus I just don't want to go back to feeling the way I did on it. Eventually my husband will get a vasectomy, but we're hesitant to do something so permanent so soon. Anything can happen, you know?

So I've narrowed it down to 3 options for the few years after I have this hypothetical future second child, but I don't love any of them. Maybe there's a 4th option? Idk

1. Vasectomy. This is ultimately our plan, but I'm scared one of our children will die tragically and we will end up wanting more. But also I realize the chances of that happening are incredibly unlikely and also with how traumatized we would be, we probably won't want any more children to be honest. But closing that door permanently is terrifying.

2. IUD. Copper IUD sounds fantastic until you read anything about the side effects. I don't want miserable 10 day periods where I lose half my blood volume. Mirena IUD sounds interesting but it's still hormonal and what if I do still feel the effects? Also the horror stories of perforation or migration scare me. I'm not worried about insertion because that's one and done. I can handle that

3. Cycle tracking with Natural Cycles App. It is technically FDA approved birth control, and it did successfully prevent pregnancy for me for a little over a year before we shifted to trying to get pregnant, but I never fully trusted it. Also I don't see how it will be effective at all before my cycles regulate postpartum. I breastfed my first and plan to do the same for my second. I didn't even get a period until 9 months postpartum. But I also know breastfeeding isn't an effective form of birth control which is why I was on the minipill.

So yeah that's my story. Thank you for reading this far along. Would love any input or suggestions or personal experiences!

I'm not even pregnant with baby #2 yet but I like to plan lol. Stretchy wraps were not really for us, but I loved, and still love, my Tula Explore for babywearing my now 18 month old. Thankfully since she was quite large (nearly 10 lbs at birth) I had a good fit by 1 month old. I'd like to babywear my next baby right out of the hospital though and I'm also hoping for a more reasonably sized newborn this time around. So I was thinking a structured newborn carrier could be worth it. Has anyone tried both of these carriers? Which would you recommend?

I used natural cycles to prevent pregnancy for about a year and then to get pregnant. And I then went in the minipill for a year and a half after I had my daughter. I am going off the pill now, hoping to prevent pregnancy for a couple months, and then ideally get pregnant again this fall. I was on the minipill which is just a progesterone pill for 28 days per pack - no sugar pills. I got my period last week and it only ended 2 days ago. I don't anticipate any "withdrawal bleeding" anytime soon. I expect my period to come in probably like 3ish weeks. When it comes, is that still technically withdrawal bleeding? Or should I log it as a period? I didn't get the same questionnaire I did when I first signed up for natural cycles a few years ago.

I used natural cycles to prevent pregnancy for about a year and then to get pregnant. And I then went in the minipill for a year and a half after I had my daughter. I am going off the pill now, hoping to prevent pregnancy for a couple months, and then ideally get pregnant again this fall. I was on the minipill which is just a progesterone pill for 28 days per pack - no sugar pills. I got my period last week and it only ended 2 days ago. I don't anticipate any "withdrawal bleeding" anytime soon. I expect my period to come in probably like 3ish weeks. When it comes, is that still technically withdrawal bleeding? Or should I log it as a period? I didn't get the same questionnaire I did when I first signed up for natural cycles a few years ago.

My daughter is only 18 months old and I wasn't planning to think about potty training until she hit 2. But at her 18 month well visit her discharge instructions mentioned potty training. It said that kids are ready once they show interest in the potty, stay dry for a few hours, tell you when they have to potty, and can pull their pants up. My daughter is very verbal and she often says "I pee pee" before or after she either pees or poos. She has always followed me into the bathroom and watches me go and she does comment on it. Sometimes she is dry for a stretch. And she loves the one book we have about pooping and the potty. She helps a little bit with putting her pants on, but she's still in diapers so idk how she would do with putting on a pull up. I don't want to pressure her before she's ready. And I don't think given her sensitive nature that she would take well to any of those 3 day naked potty training methods - also I feel like she is just WAY too young for that regardless. But I'm curious if I should get her a potty and just let her try when she is in the mood? If I should switch to pull ups the next time I buy her diapers? The only reason I really don't want to do pull ups is because I imagine changing a poopy diaper will be a nightmare in pull ups.

So I know there are a lot of complaints because the toddler seat can only be in the upper position which makes people say that their toddler has to be closer to them while infant in bassinet is down low. But the bassinet can be in either the upper or lower position (as evidenced by the 2 bassinet configuration). So I'm wondering if you could put the bassinet in the upper position and put a <40 pound toddler in the rumble seat in the lower position? I don't see that demonstrated in any of uppababy's visuals so I'm thinking maybe it's not advised? But I don't understand why.

I got a very cheap secondhand Moby ring sling when my daughter was like 13 months old. The material just felt so stiff and it was impossible to tighten it without dragging the rings further in front of my body than they were meant to be. I'm wondering if that's just how ring slings are? Or if one of the fancier ones like maybe from Hope & Plum or something would be nicer. I can afford it, but I don't particularly love wasting money either.

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When my daughter was a newborn I wasn't a huge fan of stretchy wraps. Thankfully she was a massive baby and actually fit (safely) in the Tula explore by the time she was 1 month old so that has been and continues to be our go to carrier. I'm trying to think of what I would like to get for when we do eventually have a baby #2. Ideally I won't have another 10 pound newborn so I'm just curious what are some good options to consider if the next one doesn't fit in the Tula immediately.

When she was a newborn until she was probably about 1, transferring her from my arms to her crib/bassinet was impossible. I would wait specific amounts of time, move in slow motion like I was handling a bomb, pre -warm the sleeping surface with a heating pad, etc. I did all the tricks and I had at best a 50% success rate. Often way lower. Now that she's 18 months old for the past several months it's been quite simple. She falls asleep in my arms, I wait maybe a minute or 2, and then I just kind of gently plop her in her crib. Then I walk away.

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Does it get easier with older kids? Or was I just really bad at it and I've refined the skill? I'm mostly just curious if it'll be easier for baby #2 in a year or so.