u/nuwanda_ell

i made a post on no stupic questions asking about why skinny people with body dysmorphia are given more grace than actual fat people struggling, got alot of backlash, one comment said something like how its simple to lose body fat because cals in cals out and all of that. i explained how its different for PMOS (i am a teen girl trying to get diagnosed for it), how cutting calories alone wont always have the same results because the way our bodies store it, and someone just kept talking like i was stupid for saying its not. i said "its about what u eat" as well, because lets face it it is! and that can be expensive! and they kept saying it's not, that eating less calories isn't (because of course they didn't read my comment right!), said PMOS doesn't change thermodynamics or whatever, basically explaining how just eating less is the overall thing to burn body fat. which may be true for many people, but they just flatout ignored when i tried to explain how women with PMOS store it differently, and that cutting calories alone will most liekly not help much! they said to stop making nonsensical defeatist excuses. this person may not have known what PMOS is, but they could've at least actually listened to what i was saying instead of just going on about "eating less is what does everything" and all that bullshit. its tiring.

as a nerdy girl, this lowk happens in real life too. but in any movie i've seen where there is a main or side character who is a nerdy or emo guy (rodrick, scott pilgrim, 10tihay, prolly more i cant think). they always like a girl who is popular, mean, hot, or ditzy. and in the rare case they have a female friend whos similar to them, they never like them! also in real life, with alt guys liking either 'basic' girls or only the stereotypical alt girls i've seen.

and when there is a nerdy girl character, she has to have some major glow up (when shes alr stunning, just has some glasses on or whatever), and when she gets the guy its always a hot, popular guy! i remember when that whole rodrick X regina trend was around and so was all the crosshipping and i noticed almost EVERY ship was a nerdy/emo guy, with a hot/popular/mean girl. and if there was a popular guy, it'd be the same kinda girl character.

justice for the nerdy girls!

as a chubby teen girl, i struggle SO MUCH with my weight and my self esteem due to suspected PMOS and other issues. on my alt acc a whole ago, i made a post about how i hate when skinny girls call themselves fat knowing they aren't around me, and eevryone just immediatley jumped onto "its body dysmorphia u selfish hag" and stuff, and acted like i wasn't allowed to be mad.

and i've noticed SO MUCH that people only care about fat peoples self esteem when its really just a skinny girl saying shes fat rather than an actual fat person venting about it.

edit: so lots of people are saying how its a difference between a physcological problem and a physical problem and its just self esteem issues, but it goes deeper than that. being a bigger person, we are treated differently for something we either cannot change or dont have capacity to change, or even are actively trying to change. society is not fit for us, and the toll that can take on someones mental health is horrible. so hearing someone skinny saying "ugh im so fat" (body dysmorphia or not), and them being given kindness and reassurance, when im over here complaining about ACTUALLY being fat and just told to lose it and other rude things? its pretty fucking hurtful.

https://preview.redd.it/bna320s50yah1.jpg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4cc0e0a7d4e56457385407cd0479983972ab14af

so i went on the 4hr long ghost tour a few days ago, and there was this really cool thing we did where there was a room with a TV and security cameras, and we went alone one by one up some stairs and through the dark hallway while everyone else saw us on the tv. i felt very watched while doing so, and when i came back my phone randomly started playing music. but i just cant remember what ward it was called. infirmary? womens ward? if anyone knows, pls let me know!

https://preview.redd.it/zfvvidn7rjah1.png?width=554&format=png&auto=webp&s=ee15ac4e5b89fa36674fb64abedfa93c83abbd5c

i keep seeing pieces like this all over pinterest but no luck with a pattern, so if anyone has it or anything similar pls let me know! also, could this be done with 874 yards of 8ply yarn?

i cant get to school, i just stay in my room in pain and bored all day. i haven't relaxed a day since 2022 and am constantly anxious and worrying. worrying about how ugly i am (trust me its bad), worrying about past conversations and upcoming things, worrying about the weather (heat intolerance). i love crocheting and movies and music but i can barely do them anymore. sitting up in my bed causes me horrible back pain, but my bedroom is my only safe space ever. i cant crochet for more than 30 minutes without my back hurting. i cant pay attention to ANYTHING without my meds, which i havent had since november because my pediatrician refuses to give back. theres no point anymore. im ugly, neurodivergent, i know i have PMOS which is basically a death sentence for me, annoying, there is no way i'll be able to function in the real world with all my barriers that are impossible (yes impossible, unless i magically change) somehow are lifted, theres the cost of living crisis, i cant even attend school without it tiring me for a week and i dont get any work done there anyway. it's so boring i cant pay attention. i know in life you have to do boring things but i genuinley cant. my mind will wander and i'll just get too tired. i cant leave the house without feeling intense anxiety and discomfort. i have friends but some i sadly cant hang out with much, and the others are starting to really show how much they are annoyed by me. everyone thinks im lazy because i sleep all day, dont help around the house at all (every chore makes me feel sick), and dont go to school. they think im at home relaxing all day, when really im going through so much more just laying on my bed then they are having a full important educational day, tired and in pain and wanting to not exist. i mask it but pretty shitty. and i have moments where my sleep is back to better, im brighter, but i hate it. its boring, there is nothing to do when im awake in the day, its too bright and warm, and i honestly just sabotage myself on purpose so i can go back to sleeping all day so i dont have to deal with anything. and i know that this is all my own fault, that only i can get myself out of this, but i cant and i dont want to. i will be miserable either way. i cant even be fully honset with my psychologist. my parents keep nagging me to take an antidepressant but due to the horrible side effects being things i already struggle with that ruin my life (heat intolerance and sweating, weight gain, etc) i will not, especially not until i get my vyvanse back. i went from being a gifted kid who adults loved to now a burnt out annoying lazy bitch who EVERYONE infantalises but expects me to know everything. my parents are great but no one taught me basic hygeine, so now im anxious about smelling bad especially when i cant even get up to brush my teeth. everyone snaps at me, i cant take critisicm even if its just a tonal shift, im scared to speak sometimes because i know i'll annoy someone. my bitch ass friends who have EVERYTHING complain about being 'ugly' and shit but when i do it they act like im being stupid and annoying and picky, but in a way where they just infantalise me and dont respect me and just want me to shut up because of course people only care if your actually pretty and say your ugly, instead of actually being ugly. i am stuck.

ive probably made numerous posts about this over the past few months, but my samsung phone is genuinley horrible, and i only got it a year ago. it worked great for a month and since then i've had the most horrible lag that wont go away no matter what i do. it takes me WAY longer to just make a simple google search than my friends, due to the keyboard disappearing randomly and taknig minutes to come back, delayed typing, delayed touch (i checked that it was normal tho). tiktok is the worst, many times the app will just shut on me. on spotify, i cannot open any other app or even leave spotify without it stopping and removing everything from my queue. i could be on the best internet and this phone will lag. it has caused many problems, like not being able to reply in time to VERY important things, screen freezing while still playing audio for minutes, when i swipe up to exist an app it doesnt do anything for a bit. i cant recall a time where it ran smoothly. i have tried everything, but im crap at tech. my dad cant help me and just says its my storage. its weird, my mum has im pretty sure same phone for longer, always has like 40 tabs open and a million photos, and it runs really smoothly. theres no way we can afford a new phone for me, but i cant keep using this.

im trying to get diagnosed with pmos, and im so nervous for many things because based on my current lifestyle and neudivergence, this condition will be a death sentence. im alr overweight as is, carrying it ALL in my stomach (no boobs or butt, just look pregnant with a b belly). and as a teenager, this is ruining my life, and due to chronic fatigue im unable to exercise. i am so picky to the point where i know i have ARFID (never got diagnosed bc never lost weight), and any of those PMOS meal swaps or the stuff you should eat? I HATE THEM! and all the stuff to avoid? thats all my safe foods. even if i could stomach it, im a teen in a big family in a cost of living crisis. no way we'd be able to just switch it all up. i've been trying to eat in moderation instead of binge like a normally do (im ALWAYS hungry), but i know that crazy calorie cutting does basically nothing. just wondering if i get better at eating in moderation, will i still be able to lose weight like other people, maye just at a slower rate, or will i HAVE to avoid the 'bad' foods (basically eevry one of my safe foods that i can eat without feeling sick) and stuff? cause if not, im sliming myself out (jk but kinda not jk im desperate to be skinny)

so i have quite a few special interests but most of them are movies, shows or singers/bands. movies are something i absoloutley love, and with the stuff i know you'd expect me to be watching like 2 a day, but to be honest i cant even manage like 2 a week. it doesnt make sense. i love them, i think about then, make scenarios with the characters and make watchlists and rankings, but when it comes to watching a new movie i spend so long not knowing what to watch cause i dont wanna get bored, and im too burnt out and tired to actually sit through one. shows are easier because i mean, watching superstore is a lot easier than having to sit down and pay full attention to a beautiful suspenseful david lynch film. it kinda makes me feel like a larper when i say "oh i love movies" and then i look at my letterboxd and it's been a week. does this happen to anyone else with their interests?

sorry if dumb question, but literally an hour ago i just finished the last few eps of s2 and Fire walk with me and im sobbing so much. Ive seen some people on tiktok saying to wait a little bit to watch the return, some people to start right away, and honestly i dont know which to do because obvs i love twin peaks, but im still very shaken up and obsessed over fire walk with me, and i've heard that the return def has a different style.

imma be honest i am very easy to ragebait and it's been used against me. but i've never seen it that way. by this i mean, standing up when people say racist/homophobic/ weird as fuck things that no one should be saying. and for YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS everyone says "ignore they'll get bored" i dont even know if this is like, a universal autistic thing, to be easy to ragebait and then made to feel dumb, but i have no where else to go.

no one irl cares and just says "ignore it", i usually vent in the subreddit and i did that today and just got told the same thing. this is mostly about my sister, i wont get into the entire thing cause i typed a whole long rant in my vent post, but basically she was laughing her ass off when i got mad at her for joking about child rapists and pedos and racist things, saying "come to a diddy party" and saying its ok to say because people at school say it all the time.

just becsue someone says something for a reaction doesnt mean it's ok. being told "just ignore, they'll get bored" does nothing, they dont get bored and if they do it's not worth the mental torture of waiting. as an autistic girl i physically can NOT ignore it when someone is doing that shit to me, and no one cares enough to help.

ok so this stuff is delicious and amazing just trust me, especially if u like salty/briney stuff!

-tin of sardines, preferably in oil not springwater

-1 small onion

-a few pickles (as many as u like)

-1 tbsp mayo

-1/2 tbsp mustard

-squeeze of lemon juice

-any spices u like (I used salt, pepper, little bit of cumin, and parsley)

-sweet potatos (as many as u want)

1. wash and cut your sweet potatos in half lengthways, rub some oil on them and put some salt and pepper on the face, before putting facedown in your airfryer. airfry on 200c for about 25-40 minutes depending on how crispy you want the skin.

2. while thats cooking, dice the onion REALLY well, and your pickles, and mash up the sardines in a bowl. add the onion and pickles, mayo, mustard, lemon juice and seasonings and just mix that up. kinda like tuna salad for a tuna melt.

and all done! trust these go so well toegther, just make it!

https://preview.redd.it/jbyvtndlhc6h1.jpg?width=735&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7516b43d8771f743a5575d180b3725d5e561c4d1

and the chorus too, basically the whole song (and the rock cover)

i loveeee movies and music, especially psychosexual, campy, horrors, and i love 90s sad girl or grunge music!

so yeah basically the title, tell me ur fave singer/band or fave song, and i'll give u a movie to watch!

edit: woah ok i got a lot more comments than i was expecting ill try and get to everyone! btw im matching by vibes, and whatever comes to my head sorry if its not good

im a teenager and most of my time is spent at home, and my mum is a tired mother of 4, with a job and many pets, and is stuck doing all the chores. i have audhd i think level 1-2 and PDA, my sister also has autism level 2 and DEFINITLEY has PDA, my other sister has lots of extracurriculars and my brother is just an annoying little boy who loves his ipad and youtube.

the thing is, i cant stand doing chores. i know everyone says that, but i just feel weird doing them, and when i explain it just sounds like im making up excuses. firstly, the demand of it. i can follow instruction fine, but demands? no way. and everything grosses me out. load the dishwasher? i cannot touch other peoples disgusting dirty food plates. unload it? SOMETIMES managable but the smell makes me sick. fold washing? i cant focus on that task. hang it up/take it down? i just cant stand doing it. i even tried ironing cause i can at least distract myself with TV, but i hated every second cause i couldn't do it right and im the kind of person wehre if i cant do it right the first time ill never do it again.

i do feed the cats and budgies, babysit my brother, but really thats it. i wish i could just be 'normal' about it and help around the house but i physically can't without feeling sick. does anyone have any tips on how to overcome this?

ok kinda niche but all over my tiktok ive seen people crochet eraserhead baby from eraserhead, and as a massive david lynch fan i wanna make one so bad!! but the only one with a pattern was for a tiny one, and i'd like to make a regular size one if that makes sense.

i could freehand but im lowk terrible at it and always screw up, so if anyone somehow perchance has a pattern to crochet erasherhead baby, i would love it.

IM LOWK DESPERATE FOR ADVICE CHAT

My friend and I recently got back into contact over snap w an old friend. I went to primary with him, wr were all in a good in yr7 where he was kinda mean to me, and now we've started talking and all playing roblox together. He's nice to me, and I cant help but like him. We have similar interests, he's nicer, and I js like him. Today my friend came over and mentioned she had a crush on him. I js had to say oh cool and promise not to tell anyone. I cant say anything about liking him now. It's over. If he likes her and they date, I'll have to see it all go down. In the very small chance he likes me, I cant do anything that would hurt her so bad. She's had similar stuff happen w other friends. But I'm so desperate for someone to love me. I'm an ugly fat teen girl, I'm annoying and talk too much, I've tried everything but guys don't like me. My friend is the beauty standard, skinny, has had guys like her. Idk what to do, I cannot be honest with her she's not the kind of person to be nice ab that. It would devastate her. But I rlly like him.

Also, he added one of his guy friend tk the group I and she and our other friend acted like it was the end of the world and we can't use the gc anymoew. Idk if that has anything to do with it.

ok so i never really appreciated the beautiful song that is Mother until my holiday where i was in a very sad girl lana del rey mood the whole time, but then Mother came on my playlist and i had to try so hard not to cry in the car ride from the beach. What other songs, from Tori and other similar artists, are similar?

im an autistic teen girl and also have a myriad of other issues going in my life, such as depression and anxiety, insane heat intolerance and fatigue, the burden of being unattractive in a society where that is seen as basically a crime, and intense lonliness. i do have friends, some are my best friends for years who go to other school (i have 2 trios, primary school and a high school) and then my other friends from school who those i dont see often.

even being with friends i feel lonely, and every week the thought of leaving my house and going out makes me so anxious. i cant get to school for many reasons but this is only making it worse. for example, its a normal temp day but my school always has the heating up even though they know my intolerance. i know i will be uncomfortable and sweaty, so i dont go.

im nervous to go to the shops, and my 'safe places' are only really family/friends houses. i'll go to the shops if i REALLY want something but even then its more just me thinking about going and then not going. it started out as "ugh im tired and not up for going out" but its getting worse and so is my mental health.

i have taken some online tests (yes i know those arent always proper, im not self diagnosing im just thinking based on my experiences), that have said i liekly am developing it, and im lowk scared.