u/stoicwomon

Do you ever want a girl makes the first move? Or is that a no no?

For context, I think I’m getting every hint an INTJ guy is into me? But he hasn’t made a move. Whenever I text or communicates he responds straight away, then finds a way to continue the conversation usually using wit and humour - and he generally asks another question even though there’s plenty of exit moments.
If I need anything he offers help, sends me numbers for house or car repairs. He also gives me legal advice when I needed some recently (he’s a barrister) and when I see him he kinda lingers. I’m INFJ, we have a connection, same page, same humour etc - but he hasn’t hinted or even suggested he likes me. Definitely no questions about a date!

Is he waiting for me to make a move or is this in my imagination and this normal behaviour for INTJ’s cause he’s just a decent guy?

Are there any other creative INFJ’s who are stuck in a cycle of needing to be creative to feel alive - versus not feeling alive enough to create? I’ve had this most of my life, I’m (40f) with a creative job and outwardly my life is put together.

But I know I’m also kinda low key depressed because I haven’t truly gone down the path of creating what my soul craves. But I over think and predict that as something I’ll never succeed in (in my idealistic way), so I just stay here in half hope, half defeat trying to be grateful for the life I do have whilst dreaming and burying the life I know I need.

The worst part, if anyone else said this to me I’d have all the answers for them, but towards myself if you give me the same answers, I wouldn’t believe any of them. So I just continue to be stuck in this uncomfortable mid ground of analysis paralysis and meander on through this debilitating existence of monotony.

Outwardly I look to have my life together, no one would ever think to look at me to this is the daily internal battle I live with but I can’t shake.

If you have any advice or success stories for beautify this mindset (any Mbti infact) please feel free to share 🙏

As an INFJ I’m really interested in seeing how similar the only other dominate Ni type is to us. If you’d humour me - this something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. What are my core values?
These are my top 10 values (in order of most importance). I really thought about each of them.

Ive put down 10 to give some ideas on what some are, but if you want to just share a few that’d be great!

1. Truth

2. Authenticity

3. Depth

4. Loyalty

5. Competence

6. Freedom

7. Connection

8. Growth

9. Beauty

10. Responsibility

My life’s Moto would be ‘Live truthfully, think deeply, build something meaningful, and share life with people who are genuine.’

This is something I’ve been thinking about lately. What are my core values?
This is my top 10 values (in order of most importance). I really thought about each of them.

Ive put down 10 to give some ideas on what some are, but if you want to just share a few that’s great! I’m interested in how similar we INFJ’s actually are and how much mbti factors in it.

1. Truth

2. Authenticity

3. Depth

4. Loyalty

5. Competence

6. Freedom

7. Connection

8. Growth

9. Beauty

10. Responsibility

My life’s Moto would be ‘Live truthfully, think deeply, build something meaningful, and share life with people who are genuine.’

Any other INFJ’s just tired? Like not physically, but deep bone, achingly tired in an ancient sense. Like people are going too fast paced and all the beauty from life, connections, love, romance is just flying past and you can’t keep up with any of it?

I’m 40, a kind of young 40 I guess I could say. I still love art, music, travel, history, culture, philosophy/psychology etc etc. but the more I communicate with others, the more I realise there’s nothing there to connect with. Unless I binge watch tv and follow celebrity news from 3 second TikTok clips then I’m not on the same planet with everyone. It’s like I want to be on earth to explore the beauty of so many things (mostly people) but I’m just rushing. Constantly rushing. Connections are bleak.

I even ended my 10 year relationship because he just came home every night from work, drank beer and buried himself in Netflix for hours - every night. I could never understand how he didn’t want to get some life out of his existence. But the more I watch, the more I chat with others, it seems I’m the one who’s odd for not catching up. I’m just exhausted with this soulless living, and I see the next 20/30 years getting 100 times worse.

Are any of you ENFJ’s happily married? If so to which type?
Or are any of you married or jn happy long term relationships with ENFJ’s? I’d like to know which type seems to work best (and actually worst) with ENFJ’s as this is something I feel I am getting wrong over the years.

From INTJ man maybe? This is boggling my mind a bit if I’m honest! Apologies for the length but I’m trying to give context.

There’s an INTJ guy, we met 17 years ago and have stayed in contact in a professional environment monthly. We’ve bumped into one another out on nights out and got on great, but for nearly a decade he’s been in a relationship with a girl that I know he’s exhaustedly bored with (ESTJ).

I was in a long term relationship and became single recently. Me and this guy have always clicked and had a lot in common but it’s been platonic. I’m ENFJ. Lately he’s been telling me how unhappy he is in this relationship. It’s quite often in-fact. He’s also started to text me, asking me about my trips away, or if I’m out that weekend. He’s also recently helped me out with some legal stuff (he’s a lawyer).

I’m not really sure what’s happening and why he’s even contacting me because he’s so unhappy but he’s still with her? Is this typical that you guys do this? He’s mid 30’s, not married, no kids and he owns the house but they do live together - but nothing is technically tying him to her. This has gone on nearly 12 months and the check in’s are becoming more regular.