u/wunderfulnothing

Two years ago,

my life revolved
around when
I could have
my next drink.

It consumed
my every
thought,

there was
no space left
to think.

I’d wake
in the morning
already
on edge

only eight hours
until
my addiction
could be fed.

I unlock the door
when I get home
from work,

I take
my first shot
and let the vodka
get to work.

I’m five shots deep
before I start
to feel normal,

just give me
a few more
and it’ll make me
immortal.

My needs
have been fed,
but I’m still
not full.

No amount
is ever enough—

Will I ever
feel
whole?

Two years
have passed,

I’m still
not whole.

But my days
no longer revolve
around when
I can have a drink,

my past consumes
my every thought,

now all I do
is think.

I take my thoughts
that used to
drive me to drink,

and I jot
them down
on paper.

My addiction
hasn’t been fed
in two years.

I feel
everything
now.