r/AmItheButtface

I (26F) have been trying to figure out if I handled a situation poorly with my boyfriend’s mom (61F) and I’d really appreciate outside perspective.

Recently she stayed over and at one point in time I offered her the bed because she was in pain and I wanted to be helpful. In the moment I didn’t think it through fully and just said yes because I felt bad and wanted to accommodate her.

Afterward I realized I’m actually not comfortable with anyone else using my bed. It’s something I have anxiety/OCD related discomfort around and it’s really my personal safe space. I only share it with my boyfriend.

There was also a separate situation where I felt a bit put on the spot regarding giving her $1000 and I agreed to something I wasn’t fully comfortable with. I didn’t communicate properly at the time and ended up holding everything in which probably contributed to the misunderstanding. However later I communicated all of this to my boyfriend and told him that she asked me for money and he told her himself that I didn’t feel comfortable. She ended up leaving the apartment crying and something to know is that I was not at home at the time. So I didn’t end up giving her any money.

Later on I tried to explain that I’m not comfortable sharing my bed via text and that I also need a bit more personal space in our small apartment as she likes to sleepover twice a week which is something I actually did communicate to my boyfriend that I don’t want happening anymore. I think it may have come across as rejection or like I was backtracking and now things feel a bit tense and she hasn’t responded but read the message.

I feel guilty because I did originally offer her to use our bed a while ago but I also feel like I was just trying to be kind in the moment and then realized my actual boundary afterward.

AITB for changing my mind and setting that boundary after the fact even if it may have hurt her feelings?

For starters I DID NOT actually say this to her.... but I wanted to.. here's the full story.

My nephew is a type 1 diabetic and wears an insulin pump.

We were in a Walmart last night to get a few things for a pool party coming up soon. My nephew needed some new trunks bc the ones from last year were too small and had holes in them. Across from the aisle we were in there was a lady in the shoe dept who was obviously feeding her baby. Nothing wrong with that by itself right? So we just minded our business, and continued shopping for what we were there for.

A few minutes later I started smelling insulin. I look down at my nephew and he had insulin dripping from under his shirt (where his site was) I sat him down on a bench near the shoes and was checking his site and it was halfway out. The cannula wasn't even in his skin anymore and the whole site was drenched. Without really thinking I checked his blood sugar with a finger stick and it was high. Finger stick read 438 dexcom read 384 double arrows up. He told me his tubing got caught on something and didn't realize his site got ripped out. Not sure how much of that I want to believe but anyway. Not knowing how long his site had been leaking for I instantly decided we needed do an emergency site change and he needed an injection. Again I wasn't thinking about it at all. All I was focused on was getting him taken care of.

As I was setting up his pump supplies and getting his pen out and ready to give him a shot I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked up, it was this same lady. She had this dirty look on her face and made the comment "do you really have to do all that right here?" "People don't need to see that" "You should do that in the bathroom"

What I actually told her was to mind her damn business. She scoffed and walked away. What I wanted to say to her was that it was no different than her feeling her baby in the shoe aisle and ask how she'd like it if I told her to feed her kid in the bathroom.

Would I have been out of line? Or nah?

Last year was my 21st birthday and I had been really excited for it. I bought drinking games and stuff because I planned on drinking at home with my best friend. My boyfriend got REALLY upset at the fact that I was planning on buying alcohol and started acting moody about it immediately.

Then he went into the bedroom and locked himself in there. Since I didn’t want him upset on my birthday, I went in to check on him and ask what was wrong. He told me he felt like I was ignoring him all day and only talking to my best friend.

But before we even went home, all 3 of us had been hanging out together all day — driving around town, going to the mall, talking, etc. It’s not like I excluded him. I just wanted to spend time with my best friend too because it was literally my birthday.

What upset me most is that this conversation/drama couldn’t wait until AFTER my birthday. Because of the whole situation, I didn’t even end up drinking or doing the fun stuff I planned.

Then later, for another birthday celebration, I went to a bar with my mom, my mom’s friends, my best friend, and my boyfriend (who agreed to be the DD). But the entire time he was moody and acting like he didn’t want to be there. I was trying to have fun, but I felt guilty the whole night because of his attitude.

I ended up leaving my own birthday celebration early because I knew if I stayed longer it would probably turn into a fight later. He says he hates alcohol and partying, which is fine, but I feel like it’s unfair that I couldn’t even enjoy my 21st birthday because of it.

The other day I brought up how I still feel like he ruined my birthday, and his response was basically that he didn’t care.

Now I still feel really hurt and honestly kind of resentful about it. Am I overreacting for still being upset about this a year later?

Both my wife and I are big NBA fans and have been watching the playoffs every night there's a game. But the other evening we were watching Spurs/Thunder game 1 after coming home late from picking up our kid from an after-school event, and I wanted to tune in live because I had already seen the score on my phone.

My wife usually records the games in case we can't watch one, so she said we should restart and watch from the beginning. I thought it was a waste of time since we already knew the score and it was late. But she said if we were just going to watch half the game, may as well go to bed and check the score in the morning. This is where I may have overreacted, but I said fine and went to bed. I had a long day at work and then we had the event at our kid's school, and I just wanted to unwind for an hour or so, and not be up super late.

She decided to watch the game from the beginning and sleep on the couch so she didn't "disturb me," which I felt was just further salting the wound because she's never had an issue coming into bed late before. I am a HEAVY sleeper. In the end, she got to see a great game that went into double OT, so maybe IATB.

I have trouble sticking up for myself, and also I feel unworthy to because I have been a flawed person. The past year I've been very depressed, often breaking down and feeling alone, unsure if I want to continue which is hard to put my boyfriend through.

However, the more I reflect in therapy, I wonder if I've been tolerating unfair treatment from him. A brief summary of his bad behaviors:

• Chronic liar, to the point he forgets his lies. He told me he grew up in north Canada, but when I asked if he ever built snowmen weeks later, he said he's never been around snow. When I brought up his Canadian childhood, he said he's lived here his whole life, never been out of the US. I've caught similar lies about his family, work, schooling, pets, etc.
• He also told me he didn't want to talk to these guys anymore who were mean to me. I told him he didn't have to stop being their friend for me, because I'd feel bad getting between his friendships. He insisted however, but secretly remained their friend the whole time.
• He often ditched our plans, either last minute saying he was going out with friends instead or completely ghosting for days at a time.
• Instead of communicating when he is upset, he withholds affection. He stops calling me pet names, ignores me on purpose, and insists nothing is wrong when I know something is.
• Sometimes he threatens to leave, saying "I don't need this, I have lots of guys and girls wanting to date me." which makes me uncomfortable he thinks about his other options
• He doesn't take accountability, saying his lies aren't a big deal because we aren't close yet, saying about the second point "I'm not going to stop hanging out with friends for a person I don't love, I don't regret doing that. Still hope I can fall back in love again", saying I'm selfish for being upset he leaves our plans to spend time with his friends + I should be happy for him

Despite this, I still feel it is my fault, and my mental breakdowns are the reason he needs to escape from me. When these hurtful things happen, I try to talk to him but if he ignores me or dismisses me, then I crashout on social media, saying how "no one loves me" and saying I don't want to live anymore, which is very immature of me but it's my way of telling the world I am hurting so deeply that he doesn't care about me. I feel like I am very toxic for this, AITB?

My mother is 46, and I’m 17. My father’s a no-show — financially present, but not enough. In our country, especially in our family, the culture is that children take care of their parents. So I’m expected to take care of her forever, even if I get married, and she insists on living with us.

If I say I want to go abroad, her response is always, “You’re leaving me?” I feel so torn. She’s not a bad mother, not abusive. She works hard and takes care of my needs and wants, but our relationship is kind of messy. There’s always hidden resentment that bubbles up through comments like, “You’re not rich, stop acting like one,” whenever I buy things I want, or “You’re the worst child, I don’t expect anything from you when I get older,” every time we argue. She also gets irritated easily, so one bit of talking back turns into a string of curses thrown at me.

I’m far from being a perfect daughter. I know I have many shortcomings, but honestly, our relationship has been like this ever since I became a teenager. We don’t even apologize to each other — we just let things cool down and move on. I don’t know how to communicate with her without feeling like I’m wrong for what I feel. Our views just don’t align: religion (she’s religious), my father’s incompetence (I resent him, but she doesn’t want me to and says he’s still my father), politics (she’s a fanatic), everything. Seriously, I don’t know what to feel about our relationship. It’s much better than most, but it’s far from perfect. Every conversation about deeper things seems to go sideways because she invalidates everything I feel.

Sometimes I catch myself thinking everything would be better if I died before her, or if she died early so I wouldn’t have as many burdens. But then I realize how insane that sounds, so yeah.

AITA in this situation?

Feel free to give advice, cuz i badly need it.

ps. im not​ going to do anything about these thoughts, js needed a place to say these. Thank yoy!

I was at the grocery store buying flowers for my partner and was standing in line with the bouquet in my cart.

The guy behind me noticed them, struck up a conversation and eventually said something like, “Your partner is really lucky. I’ve actually never gotten flowers before.”

I kind of laughed at first, but he seemed genuinely serious, and it honestly made me kind of sad. So I took one flower out of the bouquet and handed it to him and said, “Well, now you have.”

He looked really surprised and grateful, and for a second I thought it was just a nice little human moment. I had seen him standing with a woman, assumed they were together but didn't really think a flower would be an issue, as we had already established the flowers were for MY partner.

She got upset and asked why I was giving her boyfriend a flower. She seemed to think it was inappropriate/flirty, even though that genuinely was not my intention at all. I tried to explain that I was just trying to make a kind gesture but she kept pushing.

I apologized and said I didn’t mean anything by it, but she still seemed annoyed, and now I’m wondering if I crossed a line without realizing it.

For context, I wasn’t trying to flirt, I don’t know either of them, and I was literally in line buying the flowers for my own partner. I'm not used to public confrontations like that so the whole thing has me a bit confused.

AITBF?

My husband and I have been buying video games our son (10) has showed interest in, and seems to enjoy when playing those games with us.

We buy them on steam and have even set up the account just for him, so when he gets his new computer, He gets to have fun.

We are definitely gonna have limited screen time, and make sure he’s not obsessed over video games, He spends time outside with us, and loves being in the present moment with us, but on our game nights, He’s super excited to boot up the Xbox/PS, He loves getting to be my second player to my player one.

But I made a post about it, and I’m being bashed for it! From I’m a weirdo, to I’m a horrible parent! I don’t know why it’s so wrong to want my son to enjoy being a kid?

AITBF?

I know that's not really what happened but that's what she told people so I might as well address it. Claire and I were together for about eight months. She's not a bad person, I want to be clear about that, this isn't one of those posts. But for a while I'd been feeling like I was just kind of there, like an option she kept around rather than someone she actually wanted to make plans with. Stuff would come up and I'd get rescheduled. She'd agree to something and then quietly change it later. Nothing I could point to and say look at this specific thing, just a general feeling that I wasn't really a priority.

Then last week we started a show together, her idea, and two days later while I'm at work she texts me reacting to episode four. I didn't respond much, just said something like oh cool. But that night I couldn't really let it go. Not because of the show, I don't care about the show. It's just that if you actually want to watch something with someone you wait. It's not complicated. The fact that it didn't even cross her mind said something I'd been ignoring for a while.

I ended it that weekend. She cried and said I was making it about nothing and her friends think I'm being dramatic. Maybe I am. But I'd been pushing that feeling down for months and the show thing just made it impossible to keep pretending it wasn't there. Was I wrong to call it

​

The cast: marry: my best friend who has a terrible habit of picking the most a holes guys to date

Cam: the creep marry is seeing now

Friends: friends

Me: yours truly

I am sorry for the long and probably confusing story english is my second language so i hope i did well.

Story: so marry (age 22) has been my best friend for 8.5 years. Truly through thick and thin. She has had the habit of choosing the absolute most terrible guys to date, im talking the who's who of human trash. A mounth ago she partially moved to a different city for work (a week and a half over there and a few days in here). When she got there she met cam, he is a 38 year old guy who works with her all the time. The work they do is 24/7 so they spend a lot of time together mostly getting high. After a week or two cam started flirting with marry and she started to want him too, she told me she is only looking for something s@xuall and for someone to do dr@gs with. I told her from the beginning that a 38 year old shouldn't be flirting and doing dr@gs with 22 years old, in my opinion it's creepy and predatory, she said that she really likes him and trust him. I kept my silence after that but a week ago she told me that cam offered her to rent an airbnb in a different 3rd city (300 km from our town) to do a dr@g that she had never tried before and to also have s@x. I told her that "going to a city you don't know with a guy you barely know who's 16 years older then you and doing a dr@g you don't know how your body will react to" is the worst idea I've ever heard. She said that i am probably right but she really wants to do it anyway. A week past and they already did their airbnb plans and nothing bad happened thank god but i still Don't trust cam and so i wanted to check him on the internet, to see if he has anything that he did in the past that would put marry in danger.when i asked my friends for cam's full name and told them about my plans they told me that i am overacting and that "its normal for a 38 year old guy to flirt and do dr@gs with a 22 year old women" and that "i should trust that marry has a good judgement about her life". My counter points to that are that a 38 year old guy shouldn't be doing dr@gs and sleeping with 22 year old as he is probably using her for s@x and the moment she decides she doesn't want to have s@x anymore he wouldn't care and do the worst to her. My other counter point is that marry had shown that she has no good judgement about guys in the past (im talking over 15 terrible guys she has dated) and that as friends it is our responsibility to help protect her when she is possibly with life threatening people.

I am legit asking you guys what yall think i should do, leave them alone or double down on my disapproval.

Anyway i would appreciate your opinion a lot. Thanks

I am not talking about cosmetics or optional stuff. I mean a game that literally stops you every few minutes unless you wait for energy or keep paying over and over again just to continue the STORY. And before anyone says “just pay for it,” that is the problem. There is no normal way to pay for it. No reasonable monthly subscription, no “buy full game” option, nothing. If you actually try to play normally, it feels like the game expects constant payments every 20-30 minutes.

At some point it stops feeling like a game and starts feeling like a psychological experiment designed to see how much frustration people will tolerate before opening their wallet.

I normally hate piracy and I do think developers deserve support, but this genuinely feels less like “avoiding payment” and more like removing artificial barriers that should not exist in the first place.

So WIBTB?

I (F 30yo) have been recovering from a severe health issue (a very painful UTI/bladder infection) for the past three weeks. The pain has been excruciating. I had finally been symptom-free for a week while on my 2 round of antibiotics.
However, my boyfriend (M 34yo) complained that it was "hard for him" to go without sex. Because of his pressure, I gave in and we had intercourse. The next morning, my symptoms immediately flared up again. I am back to square one: in severe pain, drinking tons of water, and relying on Ibuprofen.
Right after this happened, his mother had a bicycle accident in a roundabout. A car hit her going about 4-5 km/h, and she fell.
Despite her age, she was able to get up and drive herself home.
She went to get X-rays and all other checks and seems to be fine but pain in her shoulder and hip (bruising, but thankfully nothing broken).
My boyfriend immediately wanted to drive down to see her at the hospital (and she was released immediately because she had nothing besides bruises). It's a 2-hour drive each way. I was upset because his mother lives with her husband, so she was not alone and had immediate support. Meanwhile, I had nobody here to help me, and he was leaving me alone right after pressuring me into a medical relapse. This turned into a massive fight. He got so angry that I wasn't being understanding about his mother's "emergency" that he even threatened to break up with me.
Ultimately, he promised me he would only be gone for about 6 hours total and would come back the same evening.
He lied. He didn't come back.
To make matters worse, it turns out his mother has an incredible amount of support right now. Not only is her husband there, but her daughter at home (his sister) and two of his aunts of his were also there. She literally has four people taking care of her.
He didn't even stay because of a medical emergency. He stayed the day after to act as a personal chauffeur for routine errands driving her to her family doctor for a check-up and going to the police station to file the accident report. Her injuries are confirmed to be minor, and any of the other family members present could have driven her to do this paperwork.
Meanwhile, I am still entirely alone, dealing with pain from an illness he caused. It my pain gets any worse, l am going to have to call my own parents to come rescue me because he abandoned me. This isn't the first time he leaves me hanging because his family needs something, it happened often(also non-medical obviously) and l've always told him that if shit hits the fan ill be second on his priority list. Why do i feel so abandoned? Like I don’t want nothing to to with this man anymore, am I the buttface?

What would you do? What do you think i need some third party opinions…

Edit: Thank you for all the replies and insights into other people’s perspectives (also medical-related comments). I usually am not so miserable with myself, but in the past if I tried to break up with him, he would seem to not let me and start crying and begging while showing up at my house and putting in more effort for some time, but this time it did go too far. I’m in no contact and broke up. I dont want to ever see him again.

This is so embarrassing to even type out.

My ex and i broke up four months ago. Mutual, no drama, we just weren't working. We still follow each other on instagram which seemed fine at the time and i hadn't really thought about it since.

Last week someone mentioned him in conversation and i went on his profile just to see what he'd been up to. Normal thing. I was scrolling and accidentally liked a photo from like 47 weeks ago. Unliked it immediately, maybe two seconds, but the notification already went.

He texted me ten minutes later asking if i wanted to talk. I said it was an accident. He said "sure." That kind of sure.

Then his friend, who knows us both, texted me separately to say my ex has been telling people i've been checking up on him and that i'm probably not over it. Which. no. I looked at his profile once becuase someone brought him up in conversation and my thumb slipped on a photo from a year ago.

I'm not annoyed about the like, that was my fault technically. I'm annoyed that a two second accidental notification has turned into him telling our mutual friends a whole story about me pining for him.

AITBF for being irritated about this or am i actually in the wrong here?

Some context first. I don't drink. Never really have, not for any dramatic reason, just not my thing. Within my friend group this has historically made me the default driver for basically every social event involving alcohol, which I was fine with for a long time because I genuinely didn't mind and it felt like a fair trade for not paying for drinks.

The arrangement started breaking down gradually. The issue was never the driving itself, it was the waiting. Our group has maybe eight people who show up to these things and there is a core of three or four who cannot leave anywhere on time under any circumstances. Last October I waited in a parking lot outside a bar for an hour and forty minutes because two people were "just finishing their drinks" and then got into a conversation with someone they met inside. It was 1:45am. I had work at 8. I texted four times and got back "5 more mins" twice and then nothing.

I told the group chat the next day that I was happy to keep driving but I needed people to be ready when they said they would be or I'd have to start leaving without them. This was treated as a controversial statement somehow. One person said I was being rigid and that the whole point of a night out is that it's unpredictable. Another said I knew what I was signing up for when I became the driver. I did not recall signing anything.

So a few weeks later when the next outing came up I said I wasn't going to drive this time. Not that I wasn't coming, just that I wasn't driving. Two people got noticeably quiet in the chat. Someone asked if everything was okay, which is a fun way to respond to someone declining a logistical role. The night happened, people got rides from each other and an app, everything was fine. But now there's this thing where I get described as "not really being down for the group anymore" which I find interesting becuase I still show up to everything, I just don't want to sit in a parking lot at 2am waiting for people who don't respect a basic timeline .

I'm still coming to stuff. I'm just not the bus anymore. Is that a buttface move or is this just what happens when an arrangement that was never formally agreed to stops working for the person doing all the work.

I (18M) have been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year now, and for context, we share our locations with each other because we both agreed it helped keep things open and transparent.

Recently, I lost my job at Amazon after only being there for about a month. After that happened, he got really upset and started acting like I “can’t hold a job,” even though the job I had before Amazon lasted almost two years. Since then, things have just felt… different.

He told me he needed space and time to himself, and honestly I didn’t really know how to handle that. I tried to respect it by backing off and not messaging him much, but after about three days of barely hearing from him, I started getting really anxious and paranoid, so I reached out. He told me he just needed until the next day.

The next day came around and things seemed okay at first, but after that his behavior completely changed. His responses became super short and emotionless, or he’d just ignore my texts for hours. Whenever I call him, it either goes straight to voicemail or he says, “I’ll call you back later,” and then never actually does unless I call again myself.

Lately, I’ve also noticed he’s been spending a lot of time away from both his house and his friend’s house, which is unusual for him. Today I noticed my messages were being read immediately after I sent them, but he still wouldn’t respond, and then I realized his location sharing had suddenly been turned off.

The thing is, this is the longest relationship I’ve ever had, and I know I have issues with anxiety and attachment. I have a really irrational fear of being abandoned or ending up alone, and a lot of my past relationships ended either because I overreacted emotionally or because I was with people who genuinely just didn’t care about me. Because of that, I genuinely can’t tell if I’m seeing real red flags or if my anxiety is convincing me something is wrong when it isn’t.

What makes this harder is that every time I ask him if we’re okay, he genuinely seems sincere when he tells me everything is fine between us. He reassures me, but his actions lately feel completely different from the way he used to act, and it’s messing with my head badly.

Am I overreacting because of my attachment issues, or do these actually sound like warning signs?

I'll try to be fair. I'm quite a disorganised person. I have a million tabs open right now, across multiple windows. In my own mind, I know what each one is for, why I need it and what to do with them all. And that's a fairly good metaphor for the way I would keep stuff in drawers and in my bedside table when I was single. I'd shove things in, have piles inside of them, and wouldn't mind if there were things visible on top. I know it's not the most tidy, but it works for me.

My partner on the other hand is a self-confessed neat freak. She's also so clean that she washes dishes with a touch of bleach (I don't get it, but don't mind so long as it's washed off thoroughly, which of course she does).

Anyway, she folds socks in a precise way, and gets upset when I roll socks into a ball, or fold my underwear a few times and place them on top of each other. When she does socks, she folds them in very specific places, presses them flat, and makes a clear line of socks in the drawer. Everything has to be done in a highly specific way, and gets angry at me for doing it differently.

I can handle her folding her own clothes and organising her own drawers and bedside table as she wants, even if I think it's totally OCD, but find her insistence on doing my stuff really annoying. She nags me to clear out my drawers and find better places for stuff like random electrical stuff such as hard drives, cables (audio, USB, Type-C, Lightning, HDMI and more), keyboards, chargers, power banks, as well things like my passport and other important documents.

So... is she being harsh and interfering in my personal space too much? Or should I suck it up and do whatever it takes to keep her happy? I feel like I should have a right to organise my own stuff however I want, but recognise that she is clearly better at it, and it's not like she's wrong about needing to reduce and tidy all the clutter.

I (18M) was at the airport with my art portfolio in my open backpack. A bored kid (around 6) snatched it, pulled out a permanent marker, and tried to scribble on it.
I lunged and snatched it back before the marker hit. I didn't touch him, but he cried. His mom went ballistic, screaming to the entire gate that I "attacked" her child and belonged in jail.
Security checked the cameras and confirmed I never touched him. The gate agent asked if I wanted to file a formal report for disturbing the peace. My art was safe, but I was so furious that she tried to ruin my life that I lied and said, "Yes, she threatened me and I don't feel safe flying with her."
Because it's an airport, security went nuclear. They yanked her out of line, revoked her boarding passes, and detained her for questioning. I watched her cry over missing her family vacation as I boarded.
My dad says I'm a massive buttface for abusing airport security rules for petty revenge. AITBF?

This was three days ago and my friend group is still weird about it.

We went to brunch, four of us, not a cheap place. The service was bad from the start. Twenty minutes before anyone came to take our order, two orders came out wrong, server disappeared constantly, i watched him stand at the bar on his phone while our empty plates sat in front of us. My friend asked for water twice. It arrived eventually. Fine.

When the bill came i didn't leave a tip. Not trying to be dramatic about it, the food was okay, kitchen was fine, but the service was genuinely not good and i made a decision.

My friend Sarah clocked it immediately and said loudly enough for the whole table to hear "you're not tipping him?" i said i didn't think the service was good enough. She called it classless. I said i get that servers rely on tips which is exactly why service matters. She said i was being cheap and making it weird. i said she was the one making it weird by announcing it to the table. it went back and forth for a bit and then we just stopped talking about it and left.

One friend texted me later saying i wasn't wrong but could have just left something small to avoid the drama. The other two haven't said anything which probably means they think i'm wrong and don't want to tell me.

I don't think i was wrong about the tip. Maybe wrong about arguing back instead of just dropping it. honestly not sure anymore becuase the Sarah thing is what everyone seems more bothered by than the actual tip.

AITBF?

I (27M) have been with my girfriend (24F) for 3 months and I’m currently on a trip in so we haven’t been able to talk as much. We still spoke through call twice a day and texted in between. Two days ago while talking I could tell she was sad/angry, when I asked her about it she just said she was sad and nothing else. When she finally opened up she told me that I had forgotten about her, didn’t care about her and never called.

I asked why she felt that and she stayed silent, I told her, that I cared about her, missed her every day and loved her with all my heart, still no answer. So I explained why I didn’t feel it that way(that we had talked everyday, twice, etc.) and that I felt we had talked enough she only answered with “ok”, “whatever”, “sure” in sarcastic tone.

I became frustrated and told her I didn’t understand what she expected me to do, how often she walked to talk, to tell me what her expectations were, and once again told her that for me we had been talking

That’s when she said she didn’t give a shit about what I thought, that these past months had been a waste of time. I told her to please don’t say those things because they were hurtful, to which she answered “good” and then said we should end things. At that moment I wanted to talk it out and told her so, but she said she had to leave and to not call her.

I texted her right away saying I wanted to talk it out and fix everything, that she was importan to me and was worth it. After this happened I talked about it with my older sister (30F) and began to wonder if it was worth trying.

24h later she texted that she wanted to talk, that was sorry and wanted to fix things. I still see the great person she is and the good things the relationship had, but she said things to purposefully hurt me, what if this is a glimpse of how things will be in the future?

AITBF for emphasizing why I felt we had been talking and now not knowing if I want to fix things after the first fight?

AITBF for making a fake AI story to get more karma and people actually believed it?
I (27M) know the title sounds bad, but hear me out. I’ve been scrolling through subreddits like r/AmItheButtface and r/AmItheAsshole for months, and honestly, a lot of the drama feels so formulaic that it’s almost mechanical. A few nights ago, I was bored at 2 AM, looking at my stagnant karma count, and decided to run a little experiment.
I opened up an AI chatbot and gave it a prompt to generate the most chaotic, tragic, but weirdly believable relationship drama possible. I told it to include classic Reddit tropes: shared phone locations, an overly suspicious partner, gaslighting, and a cliffhanger ending. The AI spat out this incredibly dramatic story about a guy who suspected his boyfriend of cheating because his location kept glitching at a specific "mystery address" every Tuesday night.
The story was pretty well-written, so I made a throwaway account, threw on a "Romantic" flair, and posted it.
I honestly thought it would get buried or immediately called out as fake. Instead, it absolutely blew up. Within ten hours, it had hundreds of upvotes and the comment section was an absolute warzone. People were writing literal essays analyzing the "boyfriend's" behavior, telling me to pack my bags, calling the boyfriend a master manipulator, and sharing their own deeply personal betrayal stories in solidarity.
I felt a massive rush seeing the notification counter climb, but then the guilt started to creep in. People were investing real emotional energy, empathy, and time into a situation that was completely fabricated by a language model while I sat back collecting internet points.
I ended up deleting the post because I felt like a fraud, but now I’m wondering if I’m actually a massive buttface for manipulating people like that, or if it’s just harmless creative writing on an internet forum where half the stuff is probably fake anyway.
So, Reddit, AITBF?