r/ChildfreeIndia

Does anyone know where I can find someone who can give me a vasectomy? I am 26 from Hyderabad and would like to get a permanent form of birth control so I don't have to worry about it again. Most places require either parent's or wife's consent 😭

How exactly does someone become 'circumstantially childfree'? I always thought that if you want children but can't have them due to external factors, you are considered 'childless.' To me, 'childfree' meant knowing from the start that you simply do not want kids. I've always wanted nothing to do with kids, be it as a father (I can be an excellent deadbeat father though), or a mother (a good one but a super unhappy one).

I have a friend whose situation sits right on that line: She says she would be indifferent to having a child if she could experience parenthood as a father, but since she's a woman, that specific dynamic isn't possible for her. Because of that reality, she says she has decided not to have children. Does this put her in the traditional 'childfree' category, or does it make her 'circumstantially childfree'?

What legacy? Most of these can't communicate, they have no intelligent brain. Most of them have constantly been praised for their basic tasks being done (like leaving dishes in the sink). They don't know what life is and have a mom encouraging such behaviour.

Any woman with a thought process is shunned. But you know, your mom (dear men) went through the same producing you and your sister. And your wife. And any other.

No one understands being a mother. I know more by seeing that it's been so scary to give birth to someone who will insult you for being able to birth you, that I don't want one.

Do men understand logic? Is it women who have always been more logical? Men seem more touchy feely than most women i meet. What war would they survive? What do they protect us from? Their own di**s?

Long post. But they all want to leave their nonsense legacy. 'Where are the real men please find me ' was my motto then. 'Now I just say stay away from me' to everyone and I sure seem happier.

As. 35F, seeing how the world works, I'm traumatized and frustrated. No legacy will happen even if you are a genius. I'm child free . I will be (human kids specific, always and forever)

Hinge(other dating apps too) clearly monetising relationships by designing such algorithm which doesnt show what you want! If not dating apps then how to meet CF women?

I am heavily debating whether or not to be childfree.

Background - 24F will be marrying my long term partner 23M within the next two years. I was always scared of having a child but I did imagine becoming a mother mostly because I had always thought that was the default path. The same goes for my partner.

My bhabhi recently had a child and now I am super conflicted and cannot stop thinking about it. I see her struggling postpartum, breastfeeding, no sleep, poopy diapers, baby crying all day due to teething or vaccinations etc and I cannot imagine the same life for myself. At the same time my 9 month old nephew gives me the biggest smile whenever he sees me and it's a joy to even look at him.

I am leaning towards being CF because of a lot of reasons. I am extremely scared of losing my sense of self and my identity to motherhood. I don't want to go through pregnancy and childbirth, I have always had body image issues and I fear that the irreversible bodily changes that come with birthing a child will make me extremely depressed and resentful. I already struggle with depression and anxiety, I had been abused as a child. I don't know if I am cut out to be a nurturing mother due to my own issues. The idea of losing my best years, my body, my hard earned career is scary.

At the same time I am also thinking, what is 24 year old me doesn't want a child but 45 year old me does, and I regret not choosing that path. Because freedom and flexibility would have become normal, there is only so much you can travel and only so many things you can buy, friends will be busy with their families, like what if life starts feeling unfulfilled and empty in my older days?

I know there is no perfect choice, but I am scared to make an irreversible decision. I also worry that maybe societal pressure and FOMO will change my mind and I will make a decision I regret later.

Whosoever I talk to in my friends and family tells me not having a child feels great in your 30s but you will feel the weight of your decision in your late 40s or so.

My partner is just as conflicted as I am, but he says that it should eventually be my decision since I will be the one going through pregnancy and childbirth.

We come from a very small town in eastern UP. People cannot even fathom the idea of CF couples here. So the pressure from family and society will be immense. Especially from my to-be MIL who is extremely traditional, patriarchal and misogynistic. I want to feel confident in my decision. Idk what to do.

Anyone else here who feels/felt conflicted? What do/did you tell yourself?

TL;DR confused about whether or not to be childfree. What did you tell yourself when you felt conflicted?

I have many friends in healthcare (doctors, nurses, etc.) who have told me that they have chosen to be childfree because they spend many hours with pregnant women, observing and performing deliveries. They say it is very painful, which is why they have decided to refrain from having kids altogether.

I also know teachers who have said that they don’t want to have kids because they see children going through pressure and soul-crushing competition that feels inhumane and very sad to witness.

Is there anyone else who has decided to become childfree because of the nature of their work?

Hey, lovely folk, hope you're having a good time.

So, I've decided to gift myself the gift of snip in August (on my 29th birthday), and I'm wondering if I can get it done at a reliable place in Bengaluru? My only concern is that I'm single at the moment, and can't go through the brain-numbing procedure of pretending to have a girlfriend/wife as part of the legal requirement.

I've wanted to do this since I was in my early 20s, and my last relationship convinced me! I was with a beautiful woman (originally Polish, 14 years older than me) who had an implant (one of the most effective forms of contraception). We never had to worry about an unwanted pregnancy, and enjoyed our intimacy through and through.

That changed my life, and honestly, I don't think I can ever go back to condoms or have my partner go through a pregnancy risk/scare. I'd rather get a vasectomy now and thank myself years later.

So, if anyone has good recommendations, please leave a comment.

hi im 22f and im going to finish my law degree in like coming 6-7 months so i told my mum i wanna pursue LLM but i'll do it after 2 years of work so i can save up some fund and then fund my studies on my own to which my mum responded "itna padhkar kya karegi , tu karle waise lekin tujhe shaanti nai milegi kyuki wo ek bhookh reh jaati hai upar se ek time k baad sirf family chaiye hoti hai apne baccho pe dhyaan dena aur family sambhalna" (why do u want to astudy sm, you'll never be satisfied, once u have kids and family all these things will look less significant to u) what pmo is you say that theres time for my LLM which is like 2 years from today and i should think about my kids? thats like 10-11 years away from now plus i dont even want a kid, i dont bring it up bec my mum says 2 thins, i say 4 and its js pmo even more so i js nod and agree but i feel so fucking disguting, im not allowed to move out so marrying a man js to move out from my house is the only option i have

Tired of rushed flaky conversations over Reddit and other socials that either fizzle out due to loss of momentum or dearth of topics, has anyone here tried penpals for something slower and more consistent?

I am 22 F, and I have recently disclosed to my parents at the dinner table about my preference for not wanting children in the future . I do want to get married tho. To this my parents reacted in a harsh way indeed, but I understand why , they are from a generation where having a child after marriage was the norm.

My dad especially got enraged, and told me that any guy who doesn't want children, doesn't have a sense of responsibility and would use you only physically, (this stuck with me) so if you go by this mentality you won't get anybody suitable to marry. I didn't say anything back because I knew he is speaking from a viewpoint that he was taught and made to believe it was the normal thing.

And on top of that there are other preferences, caste , language and that makes it even more difficult.

I am scared that I won't find anybody to come home to and if I do I would be manipulated into having one. Even if I am a very stubborn person , I would say no ,but at what cost ; I don't want to ruin any guy's life like that. What to do, what sort of mental preparation should I do for this ?