r/whatsbotheringyou

I think this is an issue I have struggled with my entire life, but truly I feel like I have struggled with this more so in my older age.

I’m in a very long-term relationship, but I moved away from my hometown years ago and have never been able to establish any solid friendships. At work, I am excellent at my job. But I also feel like this makes it easier for others to be annoyed by me. I just do my job, advocate for myself when I need to and go home.

I often feel like people pretend to like me, but no one actually wants to spend time with me or have me around. I feel like I don’t mean much to most people and that I am empty space to them except a relatively nice person and a good worker.

I think I have struggled with people not connecting with me more than surface level my whole life my family even calls me out on it. And honestly, it’s not like I don’t try.

I am not really religious and don’t participate in religious communities. I don’t have kids. I have a ton of hobbies and interests but not really anything that occupies me to the point where I can develop community with people.

I used to have a lot of friends in college and was relatively well-liked then. But maybe, generally, I’m not a likable person and I struggle with what to honestly do about that except be sad.

Does anyone else feel that way? What would you do? I have tried everything to put myself out there and I am just not important or interesting to most people. I’m afraid most people are annoyed by me or hate me.

Thanks for thinking about this and thanks for listening. I’m just really sad right now.

Long story short this women is a TERRIBLE mom.
Shes currently 8 months pregnant still drinking and smoking. Yells at her children nonstop. Threatens them. Let’s them run out in the middle of the road when cars are coming. Won’t let any of the baby daddy’s(3 all together) see their kids.

What is the breaking point in calling dcfs?
If I do it will I just hurt the kids more than what they are going through now??

me and my bf had an argument and he said something that made me feel like his love was conditional, and after arguing more he realized and apologized and said "not unconditionally but i'd give my life for you" and then proceeded to say "not unconditionally = if there's comes a point where you and my mom/ sista are taken at a gun point and i had to choose one. I'd choose them" guys am i going insane im spiraling over this

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My whole life, I've been single, and I'm in an impossible position to change that right now, which sucks, so save the bull crap. I need to put my circumstances in there because I'm 21 and can't drive. My parents refuse to teach me unless it's an absolute must. I'm a college student and a Starbucks barista working on my phlebotomy certification, and while my parents won't teach me unless it's necessary, they will help me get a car once I can afford it. It's crap, honestly, because so much of my lifeline revolves around them.

I don't have many friends in the States because some have treated me badly, while others live in a different state or country. With my job being as social as it is, I truly do try. I get to know my customers, and I talk to them. I've been there for three years, but I've never been flirted with, and it sucks.

I have sisters who have a very normal experience when it comes to men being attracted to them. My older sister is even getting married, and I'm happy for her. I really am. I always wonder, though, whether that will happen to me. I feel like I'm slowly losing my humanity, or at least my ability to care. My younger sister talks about all the creepy guys who hit on her, and all I can think about is telling her to consider herself lucky because at least she knows guys find her attractive and that she's wanted. That's something I've never been sure of myself.

I'll post a picture of myself, deadass. I don't think I'm ugly, but it's easy to get into that mindset when you've never experienced romantic attention.

I try to stay social through social media with my friends. I even tried Hinge, but I got ghosted after talking to someone for three or four months when I was 19. Now, at my grown age of 21, I feel like I'm losing my mind over my Japanese teacher. I don't even know why I picked that language in the first place. It's hard as hell!

I'm falling for my Japanese teacher. He's around my age, and I try to stay realistic about it. He's my teacher, so I tell myself he's doing his job, to let him do his job and let myself be a student, which I do. But then he does things that make me wonder. He showed me the message his friends had written on his bedroom wall that said, "Don't forget her." He was lying in bed with the wall in front of him while I was on the computer, so he turned the computer around to show me. He even told me he wanted me to see it.

He also told me during our last session that he wanted a girlfriend. He said Starbucks workers in Japan were cute. I'm a Starbucks worker. Sure, I'm not in Japan, but I'm still a Starbucks worker. We also talked about cute people, and he was pointing at himself while I was talking about my perspective on attractiveness.

And yeah, I know I sound crazy. Sometimes I wonder if he sounds like a bad teacher because of how he's acting, but he actually has good ratings, and his bio says he wants people to learn Japanese like they're learning with a friend. I tell myself he just doesn't realize how he's acting and that he's doing it unconsciously. He's Japanese, so I sometimes wonder if he even realizes that the way he's acting can be considered flirting. I know I can't assume that just because he's Japanese, but I do wonder if he knows how his behavior comes across. He could also just be playful, which might explain why he's acting like this.

But the way he's acting feels like it could at least be taken as flirting. These are the things I tell myself to calm down and be more realistic, but outside of that, I wonder if this is limerence. I feel like it is, and I know I'm going crazy. I feel crazy, in fact.

I just don't know how long these feelings will last, how deep they'll go, or whether I'm seeing this logically or denying myself the possibility that he might actually be interested in me. I don't want to get my hopes up over something that isn't there, but I also don't know if I'm convincing myself that I'm imagining everything because I've never experienced this before.

So i have this close friend me (im a dude) and shes someone that i deeply value and care for. no joke if she asked me to get a tattoo id probably do it. but few weeks ago i confessed to her abt two lies that i told. we discussed our differences and she accepted me and we continued being close friends. up until few days ago and i realised that i lied about something else back in the day (maybe 3 months ago was when i lied it. one was a dumb story abt someone which didnt happen i wanted to make them laugh but i just made up a story ) and another thing is that in groupchats i kind of misrepresentated my past, im worried if she thinks abt this. and the thing is im just scared of hurting her. because that lie was told before we got close. but man last time when i confessed and she told me abt how it made her feel just made me so fucken shitty. its not that i won't confess again i will. but the thing is. i just cant do this anymore, shes far too kind and the fact that ive done this just makes me hate myself more than i already do. and another part of me thinks that im draining her. which absolutely sucks. i had a panic attack a week ago. which is embarrassing to admit. and had one today about this. ive never experienced them before but it was challanging. another thing is that me and her are pretty close. i just dont know what to do anymore. i feel like i constantly fuck things up, i am open to advice let me know!