u/ChrysalisTarot

I have switched two careers so far, and this is my third time trying. I have only ever had so-called "white collar" jobs! This third time is honestly spurred by mostly exhaustion and mental health issues from trying to get a new job, and it's been over a year now. I have developed anxiety and depression, and I just started getting medicated, so maybe that will help. However, I am also now in my mid-thirties, and I can definitely feel my previous career being very stressful even though I do love it.

So anyway, I am looking into further education, and I am doing some certificates, but meanwhile I still need a job! Any job. The trouble is, living wage roles seem very, very few and far between. Most of the jobs I see pay like $17.60-18.50 (these are factory or warehouse jobs frequently).

I am looking at these as again, I have developed quite a bit of social anxiety over the last year, and I can't seem to find work related to my previous career.

My problem with the pay is not so much the concept or pride or even lifestlye per se, it's more so that the basics of life cannot be afforded on these salaries working 40 hours per week. I was paid 3-4 times these numbers annually for computer work, and I understand that a lower barrier to entry and less skilled work might mean less money, but I would still expect a production line or warehouse job to pay at least ~ $30 /hour...

Prices being this high and so much of the public making absolute crap money really just tells me Canada has a scarcity/production problem... What I mean is, if pay is low for so many jobs and the economy is getting squeezed, then at least stuff should be cheap. It's not!

I took my first 0.25 shot for weight loss on Thursday night, and I think I have been feeling some more fullness and less food noise. That part is great, and I also feel like my sense of taste is heightened (which I looked up and this is something Ozempic does for some people!).

All of this is great because I enjoy food even more than before but I comfortably stop when I am satisfied and not when I am overfull. Friday and today have been great in that regard!

However, I am also on Wellbutrin, which is an antidepressant known to also cause constipation. That was managed with Miralax, and I have continued the Miralax, Coq10 (supposedly helps with muscle contractions?), Calm magnesium powder, the Miralax fiber gummies, and docusate sodium stool softeners all three days. The Miralax and Coq10 and magnesium I have been taking from before the Ozempic!

Well, today, I felt the urge to go to the bathroom but it was too painful, so I used a mineral oil enema and then a glycerin suppository to try to soften my stool and it worked, but it was still very painful and there was blood on the toilet paper.

I got a water bottle when I started Wellbutrin because it also dehydrates you and I am drinking tons of water (3+ L) and getting enough electrolytes (have a powder I take) so I know it's not that... I also do an hour of cardio every couple of days so I am moving.

I don't know what else I can do, but I am too scared to take my second shot! I guess I have till Thursday to see if I can increase movement. I am going on the low fodmap diet again because that really, really helped me in the past (before meds), it's just restrictive, but it would be worth it to me.

I had such high hopes for Ozempic, and to make things even sadder, the first thing I actually noticed practically immediately is that it lowered my jitteriness and anxiety that I get from the Wellbutrin (taking it for depression and psychomotor retardation from depression)... So on Thursday night, I remember thinking, even if this doesn't help with weight loss, if it keeps helping my mood/mind, maybe I can stay on it.

But if it stays like this it's not workable. Might just take a week off to make some changes to my diet, but I don't know...

In a few days it will be three years since we lost our first ever dog. I think of him almost every day (have photos and his urn around so it's hard not to, and I wouldn't want it any other way), but some days, I'll miss him so much and for a breath or two it'll be hard to suck in enough air. Sometimes I still cry, even though remembering him now mostly just makes me happy... I'm happy he was our dog, that we had 15 great years.

We lost him unexpectedly, but he was old and sick, and that day we lost him, he was in pain. I am happy he is not in pain. I hope he's someplace very nice! I wish I had taken him to the dog park more, to nicer walks instead of just around the neighbourhood, etc. But I know he loved us so much.

I've been going through it for the last week because of yet another interview process, and I am SO TIRED of wasting my life on this. Getting a job feels like such a stupid obstacle course... And some of the obstacles aren't even from the interview process (though let's be honest, 90% are).

I had booked a hair cut for today because I have a big "final interview" later this week, and when I called to see if they could accommodate an additional service on top of my hair cut, they pretended my appointment had not been scheduled (it was the hairdresser speaking to me, and i booked the app with HER). I know she did this probably because she had a walk-in and she asked me to come in later in the day. I ended up cancelling because I hate showing up to get a service and feeling like they're rushing me. Now I feel like my hair is longer than a professional length (I'm a woman, but my hair is approaching my waist, it grows very fast).

I hate everything I put myself through (getting my nails done, steaming clothes, buying new clothes to match the season, getting a tan so my weight gain shows less, hair cuts, etc.) which I am doing just for these interviews. I have been through half a dozen final stage interviews with zero results, and I have been through two dozen interviews getting into first and second stage.

I have hired professional resume help (someone with 20+ years of HR experience) and I have also gotten interviewing support. I customize every resume with AI (and I review it to make any other changes). I am paying for LI premium (what a racket!). And all this to get at the very least a 15-20% base salary pay cut though I've ponied up for even a 45% cut and still nothing.

It's been almost a year, and I am SO exhausted.

I hate that I have to give a 30 minute presentation at my final interview, I am so anxious about it. I hate the rude and dismissive way I am treated at some of these panels; they make the interaction personal when it isn't and shouldn't be. Like, don't want to hire me? Perfect, that's fine, it happens. But don't smirk at me in my perfectly pressed clothes, perfectly coiffed hair, professionally manicured nails, and the folders I have carefully printed on that include my resume and the assignment you forced me to complete that took 12 hours of time. And it's always crusty a** older (50+) people who behave like this!

I am shocked by the entitlement to my time that some of these companies demonstrate...

Every single time, by the time I reach the final interview and then after they don't hire me, I am ashamed to say but I am relieved. Like this job I have the interview for was my dream job, but there have been so many hickups in the interview process, and now this huge presentation that is eating up my time... I just don't feel good about it anymore.

I have applied to more blue-collar (warehouse packing) and retail jobs and have gotten zero interest or feedback! I was thinking that maybe I could do a side job and just heal from the last year of trying so hard to prostitute myself out to these disgusting corporations, and then maybe get something of my own off the ground. But that doesn't seem like an option.

I am just exhausted and speechless and I don't even know what to say to people who are just starting out. I guess my recommendation would be to take whatever job you can, or if you have your parents support, to use that as the foundation/springboard of security to get your own business going.

Getting a job used to be SO much easier. And I 100% feel gaslit by the statistics saying there's only 8-9% unemployment in my area (Canada). It's got to be higher.

I am paying $60 to Bell/TSN as it is (very reluctantly) for their world cup special because they have bought exclusive rights to broadcasting the world cup in the country. So fine, that's that, and yes, the TV app does crash every so often! But then with every single commercial break, I have to be bombarded with FanDuel ads?

There are teens and families watching the world cup, it's a family activity, and to normalize betting and gambling as if it's just a healthy, fun hobby? The last ad was like you can bet in real time every time your team scores. Why would you do that unless you are some sort of gambling addict?! Where are the disclaimers? Advertising is supposedly so strict in Canada that broadcasters can't run ads for medications, alcohol, etc., but when it comes to gambling it's okay?

To frame it as if it's some healthy, casual fun, and when we are already paying to watch the broadcast is really disappointing. Can't expect any better from Bell though.

So I've been very fortunate that I have been given three interviews over the last week for jobs I would like. In all three, I have been told "I will pass your information on to the hiring manager" by the recruiter at the end of the screening call. Keep in mind, these are all internal recruiters, so they work for the company they're hiring for. I feel like I haven't heard that as often before, and I wonder if this is normal or code for you're not moving forward?

I don't have a specific case in mind, but I'm pretty sure there were instances where recruiters decided I would move forward right then and there--during the interview.

I have heard back from one of the places that I am in fact not going to be getting an interview with a hiring manager. It's been about a week since interview #2, and honestly, it would be a very pleasant/welcome surprise if they DO give me a second interview. And finally, today's interview was the one I was most excited about, and I feel it didn't go too well, and again, the recruiter said she'd pass on my info and would let me know.

Is this a well-known thing or am I in the stage of job searching where I start seeing signs and assigning meaning to everything...

Is it the challenge (valid) of taking a "beyond the man" approach? Is it that few people know what it is and when/if they've tried a session on Youtube, it perhaps doesn't immediately resonate or feel good? Is it that it seems implausible and too out there? Is it, going back to the second question, the discipline and focus it requires?

This is the only miracle I have ever experienced. I love vinyasa and do it often, both flows and also yin and restorative sessions. Sometimes I like a power session, I feel strong. And those are nice, and I will feel a glow, a small bit of bliss. Some teachers will ground in more limbs, like pranayam, dharana, etc., and those were my favourite. They offer a shadow of Kundalini Yoga...

But a Kundalini sadhana is on a different level. It can take different amounts of time to feel the benefits of the kriya, and I have had sadhanas (looking at you, Sat Kriya!) that were almost entirely challenging, but the elevation was still there. I have been doing KY for a year now, and the only time it has stopped working is when I stopped doing it (thankfully not long).

Today is Day 4 of Subagh Kriya for me, which I am also doing alongside about 6 minutes of the Har meditation for prosperity. I didn't feel like doing it in the morning, so I did it just now, before bed. I have been having a challenging time, it's been a hard day. And now, it's as if all my worries have been taken from me, everything is going to be okay, everything is okay. It is peace and prosperity already... It is a little feel-good in every limb and extremity. It is divine.

I will have to evangelize this for the rest of my days, and I will say it again... This is the only miracle I have ever experienced. There is so much love to unlock from within ourselves.

I guess another question is, where are the people shouting about this from the rooftops?

As a woman, I've always heard the saying "a man is not a plan." It turns out a job is not a plan, either, and your support system is not a plan either. I am someplace in life I never thought I would be... I don't know what to do, but sometimes I am just taking deep breaths and resisting the urge to stop living. I will continue looking for a job, but now I realize how naive I have been to think that if I just applied over and over, I would get a job. Now it feels like I am staring down the barrel of homelessness, and I need a job now. I need anything, I will do anything.

The support system I imagined is not there. There's a lot of change about to occur in my life, and it's unexpected because I never expected any of this would happen...

I lost my job 10-11 months ago. Since then, my family has not helped me with anything... Fine, I'm an adult in my 30s why should they? Even for my birthday or Christmas, I got nothing from my dad. I bought him a small gift (a mug) for his birthday and got him a nice Christmas gift. I got nothing from him which was kind of hurtful especially since I've been going through such a hard time.... He promised he was planning to get me something, but nothing came.

Now I am giving up my place to lower expenses as I STILL look for a job. Through all this time, I looked only at jobs in my super overpopulateed area because my parents kept pressuring me to stay near them...

Now that I am looking in the rest of the country, they're acting like I jilted them but I have two interviews lined up for tomorrow in just one week of looking. This is just some background.

Last year before losing my job, I got extremely sick for a few months, and my parents acted like I was making it up. They wouldn't even bother looking at what I had, it was one of my uncles who called my dad and explained his friend had almost died from the same condition. My dad had been mocking me beforehand....

So today I asked my dad today if I could stay at his place for a few weeks until I could figure out what to do. It was extremely hard for me to ask... But honestly even so, I thought he would just say yes! When my dad had surgery a couple of years ago, I took a week off work to take care of him. Before that week and for weeks after, I cooked his meals and stayed with him at his place even though I had to do my own job, so it was chaotic and hard.

But he goes, well, yes but I don't want your pets to stay here. Well where should my pets stay? My pets are clean, vaccinated, do not destroy furniture, they don't do anything. Mind you, he's had his own pets and he's an animal lover, so this isn't some hard line. So then I ask if that's a red line and he reluctantly says if there's absolutely nowhere else to take them, sure, they can stay here. Then he thinks some more and says well and your brother might stop coming around if you stay here (he's had a grudge against me for years), and I was speechless... He said, maybe you could go stay someplace else on weekends so he can come around.

Now I am looking for cheaper short-term basement rentals (cheaper than my place). I can find something about $1,000-1,200 a month lower than my own rent and I can afford it for now, but I am just heartbroken because my Middle Eastern parents have always wanted the benefits of acting super caring, but then when push comes to shove they are complete POS... I can see how people with families end up homeless.

I am heartbroken, and I feel so effing betrayed... Like here I am taking on the responsibility of being close to my parents, so I can be there for them if they need me, and in my times of need, I cannot expect anything from them, they're empty handed even when they could easily give me what I need.

Here I was limiting my job search so I could be near them in case they needed me, and my father who lives alone in a four-bedroom house and for whom I've done so much, and whom I have forgiven for so much, acts like a nasty POS instead of welcoming me and making me feel comfortable. IDK, maybe my expectations were too high, but if this is our relationship, I'm happy to F off and go live 1,400 miles away where the jobs are, I guess.

I feel so stupid because I only have under a couple of weeks to find a new place because I stupidly assumed moving back with my family would be okay.

I am moving out at the end of the month but currently recovering from a surgery, so cleaning and "presenting" is difficult, but I also don't feel comfortable having strangers see my place, while I'm here, without putting hings in some sort of order.

Today, I received viewing notices for June 21, 22, and 23 in a range of hours. Two days ago, I had two viewings, one in the morning, one in the evening. In the month and a half prior, I've received more than a dozen viewing notices and two unannounced viewings.

I feel like it's way too much and has really reduced my enjoyment of my own unit. There's an element of stress every time I receive one of these notices. They come on weekdays and weekends, at 9 am or 5:30 pm, etc.

I actually have a job interview in one of the 4-5 hour time windows I have been provided next week...

Rents are down but my landlord won't lower the rent on this one, and when people see the place, it's super small, so no one wants to actually lease it. I tried to negotiate taking the place myself for a higher price than it's on now (which is still too high for the market, I guess) but they said no.

So here they are not only making me suffer but unwilling to lower rent to accommodate what the market will bear.

I have been unemployed for about a year, and through a series of unfortunate events I remain so. I am currently in the process of moving back in with family which will reduce my base expenses from about $4K to $2K with rent, food, pets, etc.

Before anyone tells me to get a real job, I have applied to thousands of roles. Ones that are exactly like the one I did before and ones that are one or two positions lower. I've tried tailoring resumes, have been through dozens of interviews, and I don't have a job. Now the unemployment rate in my area is 9-10% but I think it's actually higher because I'm sure there are lots of people who simply stop being counted.

I am thinking of updating my car (very, very old) to qualify for gig work as my current car does not qualify me to do either of Uber Eats or Amazon Flex, and since I need to switch out my car within the next ~12 months anyway, this will allow me to make a bit of income to cover my expenses.

My business is something that I launched a couple of years ago but never worked on seriously. But the positive is that I have an email list, a website, a niche, and the basic framework I need to grow and keep going. It's something I am passionate about, and I'm in a niche where it will be realistic to make $4-7K monthly income within 12-18 months...

Do you think doing gig work makes sense? You might ask as opposed to what, and I don't have a clear answer to that. I suppose as opposed to applying to another 2,000 jobs and hoping for the best. I really think entrepreneurship would suit me better, and even if it doesn't work out, at least I'll have the company to put on my resume instead of nothing.

Unusual post, you've been warned. I was honestly gonna post this in the hemorrhoid sub, but I feel like this might be a sub result?! So I've been listening to subs for a week or so (unrelated to this event/issue). A couple of days ago, I had a consult with a colorectal surgeon to remove an anal skin tag. I thought it would be just a consult, and I honestly didn't even know what the issue was so I never had the language to like look it up and see other people's experiences. But then I show up and they take me straight to the OR and they do the procedure THAT day!

So here I am with an open wound and my doctor and nurse say for the next two weeks, defecation is going to feel like passing glass. So I was really scared. Then I come home and look up stories and there are people, lots of them, saying defecating after this procedure was the worst pain of their lives. And this includes some lady saying it was worse than giving birth... Others are saying it was "tolerable" but still painful to defecate.

So I am so freaking nervous and anxious especially because I had been suffering from some moderate constipation, had been straining with every BM pretty much and I had not had a complete BM in a few days, so I was backed up when I had the procedure. At first I was so upset because if they'd told me this would be the procedure day, I would have actually prepared, but sometimes you gotta roll with what happens...

Anyway, I get home and I take a laxative, but I'm still nervous because laxatives usually don't help me with my "immediate next bowel movement." Like usually, the next bowel movement will still be painful/hard and then the one after that will be the one the laxative will have worked on. It's hard to explain... And my doc had told me taking laxatives would not help with the pain ( I still think he's wrong though, obv a softer BM is better than hard when you're literally wounded).

And these people posting horror stories were not constipated. It's apparently just the passing of the stool that is supposed to be painful, and with the location of my wound, that made sense.

(Also a bit of background: my PCP who referred me to the surgeon said this would be extremely painful and that it was more painful than having many other surgeries. That was months before my appointment with the surgeon.)

Since I had nothing to lose, I also made a playlist, and I had these subs and was listening for several hours over the last two days. I still hadn't had my first BM after the procedure, and I was really scared...

Today I felt the intuition to go (it wasn't even an urge, it was just like... I'ma see what happens), and I literally took a side table into the bathroom and set up Youtube on my tablet, assuming this would take hours based on the stories. I had accepted my fate at this point.

Well, I sat on the toilet and immediately got the urge. I was like about to start sending up a prayer but 10 seconds later I had passed the EASIEST BM of my life?!

Like this was completely painless, no straining, super quick, complete. No bearing down, like unheard of for me. I had no bleeding or discharge from my open wound (no sutures). No burning, stinging, nothing! I was not on any painkillers, I was not prescribed any. I took some OTC painkillers the first 24 hours but then I stopped because I was scared my BM would make me bleed and because my painkiller was ibuprofen, I was scared that it would make me bleed uncontrollably since it's a blood thinner....lol.

I did use a zinc oxide balm like Claude told me, and did sitz baths. But nothing that would in my experience explain what happened.

I am shook you guys. With my history, I feel like the subs had some effect here! This is a major result in my books.

I have been practicing daily for almost a year. All types of styles, and I am absolutely in love. Lately, I have started doing something I NEVER thought I would do, and that is pose studies. Before or after my main sadhana, I will focus on preparatory or strength movements for a specific pose. I feel very motivated by it and I love to then be able to include the poses in my practice...

I know that if I just continued my practice, the poses might naturally open up to me, but it takes longer. For example, I could absolutely NOT do wheel pose when I started. I stopped trying and just modified with bridge, but a few weeks ago, I just intuitively pushed off into wheel when my instructor called for it, and guess what, I have a perfect, strong and flexible wheel now that actually feels easy. I never had to try, one day I was just ready.

What is your approach? I feel like the latter is nicer, but I am very impatient.

It needs to change to stop allowing fixed term leases that the tenant cannot terminate. The updated RRA (British equivalent) went into effect last month and now all British tenants can end their tenancies with just two months' notice, even those who've signed a 12-month tenancy contract (still the standard term and very common as I look in the UK). The difference is that should you need to, you can just give two months' notice and leave.

This would really change a lot, especially the dynamic where many landlords are predatory and lie about the unit's cleanliness or condition to get a tenant to sign, at which point the tenant has few recourses.

This has personally happened to me...

Spoiler Alert.

I'm on episode four and getting very weird vibes! It feels like an "epic grift" to me; there's a glaring issue right off the bat, which is that Jodi and Edd seem to not at all discuss which parts of the standup routine are true and which aren't?

Like, the show's flow so far implies that the story Edd tells on stage is completely true, and only the names are changed. Um? Comedy is not a documentary type of genre, there is no journalistic standard for comedians. So why isn't this discussed?

Like, right off the bat, I assume the part about Brett banging on Edd's door didn't actually happen, and he inserted himself into this tragedy so he could talk about it in his show. I assume that because he claimed his house was on Sky News wrapped in police tape the next day--but his brother who lived outside the village had no idea this happened for years? And no news stories about the crime mention the attempted attack on the neighbours? That bit of info would be extremely newsworthy, as it presumably was to Sky News on the morning after.

He also wasn't charged for breaking the door/window and Edd's family weren't witnesses at Brett's trial? How does that work if they could tell the horrifying story of how he almost attacked them too after just murdering his mom and her friend, which is extremely probative to showing the state he was in? It only works if it didn't actually happen.

Finally, there were supposedly posters in his hometown for this charity show, but Edd is firm that Brett could not have known he was back in town? Of course he would have known... Did he mention Brett in the show? Did Brett see the show?

Anyway... I am pretty disappointed this was a number one on a recommended list.

I rent in Ontario, I gave my notice to vacate my unit. There have been a half dozen notices for viewings, with only one occurring after I received notice. There have also been two other viewings with zero notice (one attempted and one completed, where all I received was a knock on the door at the time of entry).

During one of these no-notice showings, I was literally naked because I was still in bed (morning) when they knocked and the agent of the landlord had already unlocked the door after knocking even though I answered immediately, and I yelled out that I needed ten minutes to change and that I had received zero notice. At that point, I was rudely informed (through the closed door, mind you) that they didn't need to provide me with any notice.

After that incident, the people who were there for the viewing decided to leave instead of waiting the 10 minutes I needed to change because (I assume) nobody wants to rent with someone who speaks so rudely to their tenant, I assume... So the viewing never happened.

Today, there was another viewing where another rep of the landlord showed up completely unannounced, knocked on the door and said they were there to show the unit! This showing happened as I did open the door. But I do feel very upset that I was given zero notice.

Is this normal behaviour? I am with a large corporate landlord, even TEN minutes would really help me, heck even five minutes would be nice. I know they don't owe me 24 hours, but the RTA does say they need to make a reasonable effort, and if I take them to the LTB, will they have to show proof of their reasonable effort?

I can't not shower or take a shit or take a nap or take my clothes off from 8 am to 8 pm every single day.

I have sent an email advising that I will make a claim with the LTB if they keep going like this, and this whole experience has been nerve-racking (I did not write that but it has been). Home office has been completely delusional so I wouldn't be surprised if they respond really rudely...

I am not from London, but have visited before, and wouldn't mind living in Zone 2-3... But not sure if it's realistic, even with a good look around. I am looking for a place that won't be a headache and won't cost an arm and a foot to heat in winter, won't be infested, etc.

But at the same time, hoping to keep it at 1500-1600 all in, otherwise moving might not be a great idea for me!

• Your max per calendar weekly (PCW) budget or your max per calendar monthly (PCM) budget - PCM 1,500
• Your preferred letting (rent) length (12 months, 30 days, etc.). - probably 6 months and then month-to-month but can do the full year
• Space/Size requirements (1 bed, Studio, house, flat etc.) - honestly at least 55 Sqm as I have two cats, as well
• Tenancy prefs (flatshare, solo, family with kids etc.). Solo with pets
• Occupation (Employed, Student etc.) - Employed
• Your Income/Wage Details - Want to keep private as am not applying here, but enough to cover rent comfortably

Sometimes you're in some type of mood, and it's hard to see the good vibes and good things. But even now, I can see the lessons. This time in my life has taught me to practice humility and patience. It has allowed me to realize (not just imagine or think, but truly realize) that my identity and my character are not defined by how much money I have or how much success I have or whether I was promoted; instead, my character is defined by the virtues I have cultivated in times exactly like these, times of challenge.

This time has taught me the value of continuing to put one step in front of the other even when I can barely see the next step ahead, and when often what looks like it might be solid ground has turned out to be quicksand. This time has also shown me my shortcomings: that in life, I have chosen to be strong enough to survive the difficulties of my circumstances, one setback after another for so many years, but always believed I was not strong enough to actually climb high enough to overcome them, that instead my way out of struggle was good luck. (I have decided to change this belief, and to suffer a little more now to finally free myself.)

This time has stripped me of what's not real and true, and at the same time, it has shown me the power others hold to inflict pain on me--how interdependent society is. And these two together have made me brave, because I am finally standing in my truth even as I am vulnerable.

I would prefer ease, but if this is what I'm getting, I'll take this too...

Tomorrow morning, I might focus on the sunshine and the blue sky, delicious food, the dream of new opportunities, but tonight I can't connect with those things. I have so much in my life. I still have my home. I am on my bed right now. But even when I lose that connection, I can't deny there are lessons.

I have IBS with chronic C but experienced some D recently so I had to stop my "arsenal" of kiwi fruit, Miralax, and magnesium to get better from that. It's always tricky timing on when to restart, so what happened is that once I got better, I had C again and despite urgency, the stool was so hardened I didn't want to strain to pass it (yes, this happens within a day or two for me, yes it sucks). I was really nervous because I have a healing abscess that has opened up a few times, so I didn't want to open that back up.

So I got to planning with my best master plan. Picked up some glycerin suppositories thinking I'd pop a couple and follow with a warmed fleet oil enema, use a heated blanket on my lower belly to marinate it, then pass the oil and do a Fleet salt enema, to go without damage. I figured, it's gotta work if I do this and stay hydrated!

Bit of background, I also was using Anusol suppositories for the last two days to help repair my skin barrier and make this event less damaging, so maybe this helped too, and I think it did because I felt zero sensitivity.

Anyway, I started with the two Colace Glycerin suppositories and within an hour, I literally, um, sh*t my pants, ran to the bathroom, and it was completely painless and NO BLOOD. Yay!

I have used glycerin suppositories before but the Walmart Equate brand, and they never melted tbh, so this was a bit of a new experience for me. They completely melted and I feel like they must have drawn some liquid into the colon 'cause not just the cap but everything was smooth.

Good $5 spent and wanted to give credit where credit is due!

Any tips for limiting anxiety before a trip (solo)? I know mixing substances on the day of is a no-no and can create unpredictable effects. But what about in the days leading up to the trip. I have one coming up in the next 7-10 days, and I am journaling my intentions and preparing, but I feel anxiety already.

I always do a lot of set and setting work prior to a shroom trip, so there's really not much more I can do with that. I am in a very clean, safe space, I perform rituals prior to, have a playlist, I meditate and do yoga on the day of, I have a sugary drink, electrolytes water and snacks to support me, a heavy blanket to keep me warm. I do not consume caffeine on the day of.

I plan to take a very manageable dose (a little under a gram of PE), in part because I struggle to give into the trip when I don't feel safe (fear of a bad trip happening--which has never happened even at higher doses, but could). Even at this dose, the days leading up to the trip, and the first 60-90 minutes kinda suck because there is fear and anticipatory anxiety. I've had transformative experiences once the trip is in full swing, but getting there is unpleasant and fraught with anxiety...

If I had a way of pre-emptively dampening anxiety during a trip, or if there was a safe trip killer that I could know would back me up if need be, I would feel a lot better (I have lorazepam but read this can actually create unpredictable interactions and it's best administered in a monitored clinical setting). My anticipatory anxiety comes from the fear that I will have a fear-inducing or traumatizing trip. If there was a way to further reduce that possibility, it would help me feel more at ease.

AI is no help; says there's nothing to take before OR during to prevent or stop a negative experience.