u/FrighteningCrow

So, my biggest thing was that if I felt the strong urge to drink alcohol, that was Dionysus's energy. I've been working with him very closely for a few years now. But now, im on a medication that is strictly about not drinking alcohol and I've never been much of a drinker, but I'd like a nice glass of wine now and again.... is there a way to get around this? Or am I overthinking it? I still feel when he's trying to speak to me, and unfortunately, I don't have my tarot cards with me. When that urge comes, what's a good alternative?

I lived in a house where medical stuff was basically banned from discussion.

I have HEDS and fibromyalgia, and recently, I've been having MASSIVE issues with eating and keeping food down without the help of nausea medications. Looking it up, it sounds like Gastroparisis. I learned that both fibromyalgia and HEDS can have it as a comorbidity. I've been dropping weight and having issues gaining it back. A lot of the symptoms I've had from a young age. Like constipation, or going weeks to months without having a BM (that has been my norm for years), nausea, and though I don't vomit often, And idk if I have acid reflux, I still have issues eating most things even though I try to eat. It's hard for me to swallow anything that isn't basically soup or liquid, and it's been getting worse over the last few weeks because I have been noticing it more often since I have been pursuing diagnoses.

But the thing is, I don't want to spiral and go into a research rabbithole about it because then if I bring it up to my doctor (or a new one) then I don't want to sound like I'm a hypochondriac. My doctor at the moment hasn't looked into any other things besides treating my fibromyalgia and has refused to order tests for anything else. I got a rhumitologist because he was sure about the fibromyalgia, and that's how I also got the HEDS diagnosis.

How can I stop myself from spiraling out?

And is there a way to bring my symptoms up to a doctor without it sounding like I'm looking for a specific diagnosis or like I'm sure of what's going on?

(Also I am not asking about the symptoms as those are things I have to talk to a doctor about. I have a medical journal that I write everything in.)

I lived in a house where medical stuff was basically banned from discussion.

I have HEDS and fibromyalgia, and recently, I've been having MASSIVE issues with eating and keeping food down without the help of nausea medications. Looking it up, it sounds like Gastroparisis. I learned that both fibromyalgia and HEDS can have it as a comorbidity. I've been dropping weight and having issues gaining it back. A lot of the symptoms I've had from a young age. Like constipation, or going weeks to months without having a BM (that has been my norm for years), nausea, and though I don't vomit often, And idk if I have acid reflux, I still have issues eating most things even though I try to eat. It's hard for me to swallow anything that isn't basically soup or liquid, and it's been getting worse over the last few weeks because I have been noticing it more often since I have been pursuing diagnoses.

But the thing is, I don't want to spiral and go into a research rabbithole about it because then if I bring it up to my doctor (or a new one) then I don't want to sound like I'm a hypochondriac. My doctor at the moment hasn't looked into any other things besides treating my fibromyalgia and has refused to order tests for anything else. I got a rhumitologist because he was sure about the fibromyalgia, and that's how I also got the HEDS diagnosis.

How can I stop myself from spiraling out?

And is there a way to bring my symptoms up to a doctor without it sounding like I'm looking for a specific diagnosis or like I'm sure of what's going on?

(TRIGGER WARNING)

When I was a teen, I had a bad habit of SH. I would write things my adopted mother would say on my body (fat, stupid, slow, etc.) and would do it where they wouldn't find it. It was a way of coping with the onslaught of emotional abuse that had escalated around the time my older adopted brother went to college.

After a few instances, my adopted mother would bring me into her bedroom and lock the door and force me to take my clothes off so she could check and see if I had hurt myself. And I stopped due to the shame I felt from it.

Another time, when I was sixteen, I had gotten a new pair of jeans and she told me I looked like a boy (I had short hair and my clothes were always baggy) and she grabbed at the baggy spot by the zipper.

And she would force me and my sister to kiss her on the mouth when we were younger and never locked the door when she showered. My mind is so muddled that I dont know if this is a type of abuse, but I know it's not "normal" behavior.

I'm an estranged daughter and just need some kind support..

I've been doing really well recently, but I feel like it's prudent to say that I have had countless doctors' appointments and diagnoses. Im feeling really bad and sick today and trying to do a little self care. But I've been having issues with my health. I feel really tired, and I have been doing my best just to get through the week. And I just need a little support or encouragement when I'm feeling down and exhausted.

I don't know how to word everything, but I was told this is the place to go.

I'm feeling really tired today. I'm (26f) an estranged daughter and looking for someone to just tell me they're proud of me.

I have a steady job, and I'm adopting a puppy next month. But I've been going to doctor appointments and am really tired due to some chronic illnesses. And im tired but still try to go to work and keep up with the housework.

I'm not sure how to word everything, but I haven't had a father figure say that they're proud of me for years.

I'm (26f) not fully sure how to say all this.

I'm adopted, and I've basically cut off all forms of parents. Both bio mom and adopted mom and dad. I'll be honest I DID NOT see the good side of the system. I still talk with my adopted siblings from time to time, but I cut off my eldest adopted sister.

I try to explain that the parents that they had was not the same as mine. I was the youngest and experienced a lot of neglect or outrageous abuse (mainly emotional and mental). I was told I wasn't good enough for the family, that I was a burden, and multiple times, my adopted mother would say she wished she didn't take me and only took my sister. Or say that I was lucky that she didn't take me back to the agency. But my siblings still say that I should try talking to my adoptive parents. And the thing is I had tried for years. And every time, it's clear that they haven't changed a thing.

The thing is.... sometimes when it's really hard, or when something hits and I can't deal with it... I still want my mom or dad so I can call them and get love and support. But I know they wouldn't do that. Its been over three years since I last spoke to them (I went to my adopted brother's wedding and only said hi) and sometimes I still find myself wishing that they weren't the way they are. That they'd call and we'd have a good conversation. But I know that wouldn't happen. And those times... I don't know how to react.