u/GamerBhoy89

Cant seem to find it. Or is it just a YouTube video?

Does anyone here ever feel like this?

I own a Switch 2 and also a Retroid Pocket 5, and I do love the idea of sitting on a bus/train/plane, or in a cafe, and minding my own business and chilling with a game.

But there's this invisible brick wall that halts me from doing it. The sheer sense of dread, anxiety and unease at the idea of playing a video game in public for others to see in fear of judgment or unsolicited comments.

Have I actually played my Switch in public before? Yes, I have, but every time I do, I feel like I'm doing something wrong, or shameful, and I get so much irrational embarassment, that I just end up turning it off, putting it back in my bag, and just doomscrolling my phone in order to feel "normal".

My fears are always the same; someone passing by and either looking at me, looking at what I'm doing, or seeing what I'm playing and making an internal judgment into themselves as they walk away.

I'm also anxious of someone who recognised what I'm doing and makes some sort of commentary, or stands and watches me.

I understand this is a - as I said - irrational feeling, but I cannot shake it. Scrolling my phone on the bus is boring to me, listening to music is fine but I much prefer to be playing something. I'm happier that way.

But anyway, does anyone else get this feeling? The feeling that you're participating in some sort of stigmatised, or "wrong" activity? How do you even get to the point of not being bothered by it?

[EDIT] Okay I've seen some comments here that are of some sort of comfort; the ones stating that people often won't pay attention or care - that's a relief to hear. Sounds daft when I say I've never thought of the opposite, but where I live, there are plenty of hooligans that misbehave on public transport and it sort of puts me off, but again if I keep in the mindset of them not caring, it might encourage me more. I guess they'll be too occupied being toe-rags than wondering what I'm doing.

To those that are telling me to get therapy, or grow up and be an adult, or that I made an embarrassing reddit post - you people are fortunate to not share the same feelings I do when it comes to social situations; I envy you. I wish I could say those kind of things to people suffering from chronic anxiety etc. and not feel like an AH afterward.

To the rest of you. Thanks. I thought I was alone in this. I'll try and get into the mindset of reminding myself nobody cares what I do in public but I've had this stupid problem for 20 years and while I am now more confident talking to people who talk to me first, the "doing what you enjoy in public" has always been a challenge. So I'll work on it.