u/GenoveveSimmons15

TW: Mentions of hate crimes, murder, rape & pedo stuff.

Before I start, I wanna emphasise that I'm obviously not saying this about everyone in the community, but there's a portion of it that I'm just beyond disappointed with as a bi woman.

We always talk about "protecting our own", especially when it comes to hate crimes & laws around the world that actively seek to threaten our peace, but yet we still allow stuff like this to happen. So many gay men & trans women have been brutally attacked & murdered because of these DL predators & I've truly fucking had it with people in this community still seeking them out when we need to keep as far away from them as possible.

Why is this still a thing? Why are so many of us allowing desire to cloud our judgement? Why are so many of us so willing to sacrifice morality for the sake of some cheap thrill that'll ultimately prove to be meaningless & will cause nothing but harm? I just don't get it. We all hear horror stories about DL men who are so scared of being found out that they senselessly murder the people they hook up with yet we continue to have these fantasies about getting with these people & "turning them".

Don't even get me started on porn that focuses on this "fetish". No, this isn't me shaming anyone for watching porn because I'd be a massive hypocrite, but man, some of these categories do way too much & imo, shouldn't be allowed to be a thing. Like, the amount of abusers, murderers, child predators & rapists who've been exposed for being huge porn addicts is crazy. These people will stop at nothing to find the most extreme content, even going to the fucking dark web where the illegal stuff resides. Hell, these men would rather be all these horrific things than be outed. That's how deep their bigotry goes. Hell, I'll go even further. Most of these lawmakers who actively target queer people are more empathetic to abusers, murderers, child predators & rapists than queer people. The same can be said for a lot of religious people? Why? Because they themselves are likely just as guilty of these crimes. That's how deep this goes.

I know the phrase "we need to do better" has become quite the cliche, especially online, but man, it definitely applies here. Regardless of how badly some of you wanna realise this fantasy, endangering your life & disregarding the very real dangers for the sake of cheap thrills isn't worth it in the slightest. You deserve to be loved by someone who won't treat you as less than human, their "dirty little secret", their sexual outlet. You deserve love. Real, genuine love.

I really wanna vent about this because I know a lot of WOCs, especially black women, are just as over it as I am.

So, let me provide you some context behind this rant:

I, a mixed white / black Caribbean woman who's been working in hospitality for a while, recently had a customer who thought it was cute to be microaggressive towards my attitude & I was so perplexed by it because not only did it seemingly come from out of nowhere, it was completely unnecessary. I wasn't even addressing him to begin with rather, it was a friend regarding bill stuff. I tried keeping my rantings & ravings to myself whilst doing other things & when I later had to explain to the person who was micro aggressive to me why that wasn’t OK, I was quite literally screaming on the inside because it’s a sensitive subject for me & it just seemed like he didn't truly understand, which made it even more frustrating. Mind you, both of them were white guys. What did touch my heart though was how empathetic the other guy was towards me because even he agreed with me that what happened was way too far & unacceptable. He was way more willing to listen to why what happened hurt so much & appeared to be way more educated on the deep rooted issues of the matter than the other guy.

Now that I've explained what happened, I wanna talk more about my frustrations when it comes to how the “angry black woman” label has hurt me a lot, especially when it's not at all warranted. The exhaustion I experience when I'm met with certain kinds of disrespect by either non-black people or those who try to call from within the house has been reaching a boiling point. There's only so much you can do when it comes to using the ignorance card. People's reputations get damaged by things like this. People's friend circles get broken by things like this. People's lives are ruined by things like this. This isn't or has ever been something to make light of & I refuse to take it.

"Raising a kid & raising an animal are different things."

No shit, Sherlock, but you know what? I'm glad they are.

One thing takes a huge toll on you physically & mentally when you give birth to it & is more stressful to raise while the other doesn't do anything to your body & has actually been proven to help improve a lot of people's mental health. One thing is forced onto billions of women & girls while the other isn't.

I'm also not the kind of person who's selfish enough to bring another life into an environment that could potentially be harmful to them whether it's to do with lack of habitability or abuse of any kind because of shit like generational cycles, God or desperation to keep a relationship in tact. I'm also not the kind of person who's evil enough to shame other women for not having kids due to things like health complications, trauma or financial issues.

It's our right to not want to put ourselves through life-changing things like birth & raising children. It's our right to opt for other options. It's our right to want to treat our animals like our babies & not like objects like so many of you so-called "pro-life" fuckwads do to both your animals & kids. It's our right to grieve the loss of a pet the same way as how a mother grieves over the loss of her kid. Yes, the circumstances are different because we as humans can't give birth to other species, but so what? Who fucking cares? Who are you to be mad at that? I thought you so-called champions for life actually cared about life. Oh, wait, I forgot you make things all about yourselves.

Now, unless you see us mistreating our pets or saying nasty things about your kids, I suggest staying out of pet parents' business. Sincerely, a proud childless cat lady.

I’m a deeply self-critical person who tends to get in my head often & the place I'm at can be kinda hectic sometimes.

One mistake after another doesn't help. Don't get me wrong, I'm not always flopping. There are times where I'm just straight up vibing & thriving, but lately, there's been a pattern where it's due to either misunderstandings / miscommunications or my own dumbness clowning me & it's been really making me frustrated at myself. I know I've been reassured by people who do care about me, but even that's not enough because I'm so annoyed at myself.

I also wish I didn’t any of my stupid fucking personality flaws screw me over & isolate me from people. I know it’s obviously not from everyone because I like to think I get on with a lot of people, but fuck, man… I could only wish I was able to be as social as I wanna be with certain groups of people because while yes, I can be quiet sometimes & be in my own headspace, I also like being social. At the same time though, when I do get into conflict with someone, I distance myself to avoid getting too angry.

Idk, man. Maybe it's just me overthinking a lot. I'm just in a weird place atm.

Imagine being so much of a controlling, abusive narc that you have to trap your victim in a relationship with you via a child. Could you imagine finding out that's how you were born? I wouldn't be able to live with myself. This is also in relation to the term 'bandaid baby', which in itself makes me ill because WTF d'you mean that your relationship is in such a bad place that you think having a kid will resole things? Also, nobody in their right mind would think to do this unless it's to, again, trap someone. Also, how come you hear a lot of popular stories of women doing this to men, but when it comes to men doing it to women, it's not as popular? Like, it's terrible either way. Nobody should be doing that to anyone. It's so dehumanising.

Notice how these sick pro-lifers are either quick to turn a blind eye to this or try to outright justify this kind of abuse. I know, right? Shocking. I'm so surprised. Never would've expected it... Lol. This is just yet another reason why these people aren't to be taken seriously at all because let's be real. They don't actually give a fuck about human life. They're just objects for their shitty little idea of a "family". Believe it or not, you don't need kids to be happy. Not everybody is fit enough to raise kids. We've seen so many examples of this & every time I hear about it, it makes me see red because no kid deserves to be born into a dangerous environment, especially one that makes them feel less human.

I know in some spaces, this is considered a "hot take" / "unpopular opinion", but tbh, idk why. Like, we have the ability to be with both men & women, cis or trans, whereas those who are gay / lesbian become huge targets because of the fact that they're attracted to the same gender. They're either forced to undergo conversion therapy or be put into lavender marriages, both of which suppress one's true sexuality (not saying bi people have never endured this, but historically, this has mostly affected gay men & lesbians). Idk about you, but that all sounds like privilege to me.

Seeing so many people call it a "myth" / "not real" is so ridiculous to me because even if we chose to be with someone of the opposite gender & we don't get any crap from anyone, so what? That's our decision, not yours. Yes, it's true that we are able to pass & blend in with the rest of hetero society worldwide because of the aforementioned fact in the first paragraph, but that doesn't mean we're immune to discrimination or hate crimes. None of us are blind to what's happening to our queer siblings. We just so happen to be a group of people that are seen as slightly more "socially acceptable" by said society in comparison, which yes, is deeply unfortunate, but that's just how things are.

Let's also not forget about people within the queer community openly expressing biphobia & how it seems to not be as called out as homophobia or transphobia is. How on Earth does that make any sense? We're literally part of the same community & you're openly disrespecting us. Could you imagine if a bi person said nasty things about gay & trans people, they'd be rightfully ripped to shreds. It all just reeks of jealousy imo.

Again, I don't see much of an issue in acknowledging the realities of how many of us bi people are seen by those outside our community. It's not like doing so erases what we have to deal with because it doesn't.

I'm a Brit who's partially of Spanish descent (I'm of Spanish, Irish, Italian, Polish & Jamaican descent to be exact) & I also just so happen to not be a fan of football. That being said, hearing the news that Spain was able to beat Argentina & avenge England brought such a huge smile to my face.

Not only was it exhausting to witness Argentina's toxicity throughout this year's game both from the players & their fans, countries around the world were coming together to call them out as well as FIFA themselves for overseeing & enabling their disgusting behaviour. Karma was more than overdue & Spain being the one to wield the power of international unity was awesome. I just know Argentina will have an extremely hard time showing its face again after all that transpired & given Messi's retirement, it's all just gonna be downhill from here. Once the whole world despises you, you might as well hang it up & bow out while you still have a shred of dignity left.

Spain, congratulations on your win. You've more than earned it. You've done the world proud.

EDIT: LMAO these Argentina fans are mass-downvoting my post. Keep going, guys. You're just proving my point about how embarrassing you are.

So, I've seen conversations about her rekindling things with a previous lover (Ricky Alvarez) & how certain songs on Petal sound similar to ones from her previous eras, most notably "Thank U, Next" & I'm starting to notice what she's doing here.

All this & how the way she's been flaunting her ED on social media feels like a callback to her partaking in Tumblr's ED culture seems like it's all part of some goal to go back to the past & relive parts of it. Why exactly? I guess the comfort of familiarity is calling to her & she's taking extreme lengths to achieve it even if it involves taking others down with her. Just look at her refusal to acknowledge the people including her own fans that are getting triggered by her ED or any of the stars that've passed away due to anorexia.

People can talk about her trauma & her apparent want to go back to her earlier days due to said trauma all they want, but let's get one thing crystal clear. This is a woman who's more than capable of affording the best therapists in the world, but chooses not to. This is a woman who's almost completely incapable of recognising her negative impact on those around her with her actions. Her want to go back to moments in her life that feel "comfortable" to her are actively harming people & her blind selfishness refuses to let her see that. Sure, we all have moments where we feel sentimental & wanna relive moments of our lives that makes us happy, but this? This isn't it.

For all we know, this upcoming era will feel more like a rehash of previous eras, one that'll remind me of when Ari played the character of Peaches in the 'We Can't Be Friends (Wait For Your Love)' music video, specifically when she was revisiting memories, which is really sad to watch now because given what Ari's doing to herself, she likely won't make it to her 40s if she continues down this path. It's like she wants to go back before she, well... You know. I know that's a really morbid way of looking at things, but that's genuinely how I feel.

Idk nor do I care who's responsible. This girl can't keep doing this to herself. She can barely move compared to how she used to & it's become near impossible to watch. Like, I'm not even a fan of hers like that, but even I wouldn't wish something this bleak on anyone. Like, my heart genuinely hurts for the fans who hate what she's doing to herself & have had to stop following her due to how triggering it all is.

As for the delulu stans who wanna pull out the mental gymnastics as to why she isn't performing like how she used to, no, it has absolutely nothing to do with aging or anything like that. It's the ED that's been flaunted around. Plain & simple. Believe it or not, there are older stars that can still move like how they did years ago because they actually take care of themselves. There's no excuse for her to do this to herself & again, for the delulu freaks in the back, trauma's an explanation, not an excuse. She has more than enough money & resources to go to therapy & start her journey to recovery yet she's not using it for those reasons, which is why this is so infuriating.

She knows how many young & impressionable people are in her audiences & yet she & her enablers don't care about them. Mind you, these same enablers still have the audacity to complain about how people talk about the bodies of public figures. It's because of shit like this. Y'all are part of the problem. Take some damn responsibility ffs. Ari's not a friggin child. This is a woman in her 30s. She knows exactly what she's doing & why it's harmful. Stop defending & infantilising her.

I was just walking to the local shops when some kid spray something from their parents’ car. Of course, I was completely taken aback by this because who wouldn’t be? To make it worse, when I trying signalling to the parents (they lowkey looked miserable ngl) about what happened, rather than apologising on their kid’s behalf, they honked their stupid horn at me & sped off, encouraging the kid’s behaviour even more. I’m probably not the only person they did this to, but the fact that parents would actively enable this kind of behaviour is just pathetic. Like, believe it or not, not everyone’s gonna find that kind of stuff funny & when you get the wrong person, it often gets ugly & while I’m obviously not wishing that on them, allowing a kid’s behaviour to get worse will only backfire. There’s a reason why the phrase “fuck around & find out” exists. Yet again, encountering unprovoked disrespect from children isn’t anything new to me. Even back then, I knew they were failed by their parents. Still, I absolutely despise this practice of so-called “parents” who think they can allow their kids to do whatever they want without any repercussions including going after strangers. There’s a reason why people say a child’s behaviour is a reflection of how they were raised. Like, whenever my mind goes to people who are unable to have them for whatever reason, I get angry because most of the time, they’re way more likely to be better parents than the people who choose to have kids & treat them like commodity. Sure, I myself wasn’t a saint growing up, but at least my parents actually gave a shit about discipline.

Imagine actively becoming one of the most hated people in the online pop culture space due to being extremely toxic, misogynistic, hypocritical & bad faith, openly victim-shaming & using legal threats towards people while still having the audacity to virtue signal for other figures for clout & pose as a “journalist” when you’re just some random guy on the internet.

One word: EMBARRASSING.

Even if you’re not a staunch feminist, it doesn’t take rocket science to see that this sad, little man's especially hateful towards female singers & his selective defences are as fake as he is. He’s a vulture who’s bitter & jealous of everyone who gets more views than him. He genuinely believes that being a social climbing suck up to the "right" people will get him in the Hollywood network. It’s some of the cringiest shit I’ve ever seen in my life.

With Ari, he's taking out the playbook of the people pissing & moaning about everyone who's rightfully concerned about what Ari's doing to herself & how it's affecting others. I'm pretty sure he knows damn well how EDs majorly affect women & girls (obviously not disregarding the males who deal with this because they do), but just when you thought he could go any lower from his scandal involving Adam McIntyre where he openly accused him of lying about his grooming story involving Colleen Ballinger, he's willing to throw ED survivors under the bus for the sake of a woman who doesn't even know him. He truly is a parasocial parasite. He even has his own set of pathetic minions (there's one in particular who's a ginger woman who's been appearing a lot on his channel lately & good lord, she's just as insufferable as he is).

They either keep using those poor girls as mouthpieces whenever they get asked about Manon & punish them if they ever "spoke out of line" or they (allegedly) tell interviewers to not accept any questions about her. Idk how or when this pattern will come to an end, but I'm glad everyone's keeping tabs on this because it's especially telling. I guess after the whole situation with NewJeans & Min Hee Jin on top of Bang Si-Hyuk's legal downfall, HYBE in particular got shit scared of getting into more legal messiness. As for Geffen, you only have to look at Scooter Braun's history of scummy behaviour towards numerous celebrities, particularly when it came to the ownership of masters, to know that they're a shitshow company.

The pro-ana community‘s known to be one of the most dangerous communities to ever exist due to how it targets extremely vulnerable & impressionable people into harming themselves via restrictive eating & drinking, vomiting or weight loss drug abuse.

Whether these people realise it or not, those who are actively trying to stop the very important conversation about Ariana‘s anorexia are enabling the pro-ana community & are allowing them to keep killing women & girls. Mind you, a lot of these people have daughters, sisters, nieces, cousins & friends that look up to Ariana in more ways than one & yet for whatever reason, they don’t take this into account. All of a sudden, the potential impression left on them doesn’t exist. All that matters to these crazy stans / apologists is defending their “queen”, which is beyond sick because most of them are obsessed with seeing their own disorders in her & they grow defensive; to them, criticising her is like criticising them. It’s the epitome of a parasocial relationship.

As for those who aren’t backing down & continuing to sound the alarm about what Ariana’s doing, good on you. I’m with you guys. This isn’t some private matter that can be dealt with behind the scenes. It‘s unfolding in front of the world’s eyes & nothing’s being done about it. Not even anyone in her close circle‘s willing to step in & get this girl the help she clearly needs & before anyone says: “tHeY tRiEd!” or “tHeY’rE tRyInG!”, if that’s the case, it’s clearly not working.

TW: Sexual harassment & rape threats

You don’t have to be a fan of an idol / group to know that any form of depravity towards them is wrong. This case for example is one of the most repulsive I’ve heard about in a while.

Idk how these people go by their lives being this vile towards idols. Like, this isn’t flattering or flirtatious. It’s the type of shit that makes you wanna become a born again virgin. Who in their right mind would say to an idol that they wanna rape them & talk about their genitals? That’s beyond sick. These people need to be deplatformed & go to prison or be placed in a psych ward at the very least.

Shame on the parents too for their neglectful asses being enablers to this garbage on top of other sasaeng behaviours & before anyone tries it with the whole “BuT tHeY mIgHt NoT hAvE kNoWn AbOuT wHaT tHeIr KiD wAs DoInG!”, this isn’t about that. I’m talking about those who DGAF when it comes to raising their kids properly & the only way they “step in” is either making up garbage excuses or covering up the mess their hell spawn made, so they don’t have to deal with humiliation.