u/Inevitable-Ground281

It's becoming increasingly difficult for me, especially as the years go by, to feel well or at least at peace, in general. Looking at the world around me doesn't help, i don't know if it's the fault of my personal "lens" with which I look at things, but trying to be objective, I see more negative things than positive ones. I probably tend to dwell a lot on the injustices of the world, on the inability of human beings to be more understanding towards others, whether they are humans or animals. I don't want to get into the merits of why we tend to do bad or cruel things, because i believe that looking at it from a higher perspective, no one is really responsible for who it is. I can't help but feel sorry for the way the world is now, and I can't help but see it and suffer because of it, feeling helpless. Even when I'm distracted and happy, those moments are very few and last too little. I often think that it would have been better not to have been born, because I am like a helpless ant that doesn't know where to turn. I write all this with a heavy weight on my chest, and I hope that anyone who feels the same way can find some relief.

I hope this is the right sub to write these things in, otherwise i apologize.

I don't know if this sub is correct, if not I apologize.

As a girl who is not very good at picking up on signs of interest, I can't relate well to men for this reason. There have been several occasions where other people have had to tell me that a man was interested in me because I didn't see any signs, and I happened to believe that the other person just wanted to be my friend without any ulterior motive. This thing makes it difficult for me to understand how I should behave with them :/ Do you have any advice on this? Are there any signs that are truly obvious?

I talked about this with my psychologist years ago, but we never got to the bottom of it, so I'm curious to hear your experience with this.

For as long as I can remember, I've always been an emotionally avoidant person, despite my desire to get close to people, especially romantically. It works like this, I get infatuated and we talk until the other person shows that they are romantically interested in me, from that moment on I become detached and I no longer feel anything, except annoyance. It's something that eats away at me inside because I don't feel connected to others and I feel a deep inner loneliness.Have any of you experienced this? Is it fixable?

Do you talk to yourself and reassure yourself? Do you listen to music? Do you watch videos to distract yourself?I'm curious to know how people comfort themselves to feel better :)

Immagino sappiate bene quanto sia frustrante e fastidioso camminare per strada e ricevere commenti inopportuni del solito cafonazzo di turno, voi in che modo reagite? Solitamente li ignoro, ma farlo mi lascia una sensazione di impotenza e frustrazione. Pensate sia meglio reagire in qualche modo o continuare ad ignorarli?

I've been reflecting on all the mental schemas I've become aware of over the years, through a process of conscious self-work. To be clear, mental schemas are the beliefs we passively absorb from society, family, school, and religion from childhood on, presented as obvious truths, never questioned, preventing us from clearly seeing ourselves and the world.

I'll write them here and I'd like to know your opinions.

Man-woman:

Men have more discernment than women.

Women are fickle and capricious.

Women should stay home and take care of the children.

Women aren't suited to take on serious responsibilities.

Women aren't suited for positions of command.

A healthy man is heterosexual. A healthy woman is heterosexual.

Men are more intelligent than women. Women are more intelligent than men.

Children:

Children don't understand anything.

Children don't remember anything.

Children need rules.

Children who misbehave must be punished.

A healthy slap has never hurt any child.

Children must be grateful to their parents for bringing them into the world.

Children must give their grandparents grandchildren if

they want them.

Children must forgive their parents' mistakes.

Children must take care of their parents in old age even if they were mistreated as kids.

Religion:

The world was made by someone.

The God who made the world is male / is female.

Humans aren't just animals, they were created in God's image.

God loves you so much, but if you disobey he'll make you burn for eternity.

God is merciful, but he exterminated men, animals, and plants.

God is good, but he punishes man because he doesn't like how he himself made him.

Parents:

Parents always do their best for their children.

Parents who make mistakes do so because they

themselves weren't loved by their own parents.

Parents who abandon their children, who mistreat or abuse them, must be forgiven.

Whoever doesn't forgive their parents will never find peace.

Family:

It's the only possible foundation of society.

Having a family is a form of protection.

School:

It's right for children to grow up segregated in schools.

Whoever does well in school does well in life.

Work:

It's right that adults, after being segregated in schools, get segregated in the workplace.

It's right for adults to spend eight hours a day working (when things go well).

It's right to convince men that they need to manufacture things that pollute the planet.

Wealth:

It's normal for the rich to exploit the poor.

It's normal for 1.5% of the world's adult population to own 47.5% of global wealth.

Justice:

In the end, on Earth, the wicked pay and the good triumph.

(Sorry for the grammar, but I'm writing with a translator)

I've noticed that some people find dark circles under the eyes attractive. Is there a reason for this?

When it happened, I was 9-10 (it lasted a year) and he was 19-20.

I went through psychological counseling, with the help of professionals, and then I worked on myself on my own.

I've processed what happened and I'm comfortable talking about it. Ask me whatever you want.

Per farvi un esempio, amo la trilogia di Prima dell'alba, i film di Woody Allen, Closer, Will Hunting. Vorrei vedere un film in cui i personaggi sembrano avere delle vere conversazioni profonde. Potreste consigliarmene qualcuno? Grazie!!

Per chi ha mai fatto catcalling : cosa vi ha motivato in quel momento? Per chi non l'ha mai fatto : quale pensate sia la motivazione di chi lo fa?

Pensate esistano dei segnali inequivocabili che possano farvi capire se un amico con cui parlate solo online (per distanza) sia interessato romanticamente a voi? C'è qualcosa che fareste o direste solo ad una persona che vi piace?

L'altro giorno sono uscita insieme con mia sorella e il suo nuovo fidanzato. Eravamo seduti in un tavolo a bere un drink, io arrivata al secondo drink mi rendo conto che non riesco a finirlo tutto, è praticamente pieno e per me è un peccato buttarlo (anche perché aveva pagato lui) A quel punto chiedo al fidanzato di mia sorella se vuole berlo lui, lui accetta e mia sorella si arrabbia tantissimo, fa una scenata davanti a tutti dicendo a lui che non avrebbe dovuto accettare, bere dal bicchiere di un'altra persona (con una cannuccia diversa) è intimo ed è stata una mancanza di rispetto nei suoi confronti.

Credete sia vero? È considerabile una mancanza di rispetto? Per me quel gesto era del tutto innocuo, non c'era assolutamente nessuna malizia

Ho notato che con il passare degli anni sono aumentati sempre di più (mi riferisco ai peli sull'areola) e non li sopporto. Li tolgo con la pinzetta ma mi hanno detto che sarebbe meglio non farlo perché è una zona delicata. Voi li togliete? Se sì, cosa usate per toglierli?

È da un po' di anni che sospetto d'essere autistica, ma vari motivi non sono andata da uno psicologo per poter capire meglio.

Ammetto anche che ho un po' paura di un'ipotetica conferma.

Come dicevo nel titolo, prima della diagnosi, c'erano dei sintomi che vi hanno fatto sospettare di essere autistiche?

Vi è mai capitato di scambiarvi uno sguardo intenso con uno sconosciuto e non dimenticarlo più?

Non ho dettagli da aggiungere

Ho intenzione di togliere il nero che ho adesso, faccio la tinta nera da anni quindi è ben stratificato. Ho una ricrescita di circa 3-4 cm biondo scuro, come potrei fare? Basta decolorare 2-3 volte con ossigeno a 20 volumi senza toccare le radici e poi fare il copper?

Per chi ne ha sofferto o ne soffre, avete trovato la causa della vostra? Se sì, come l'avete affrontato?

Io so qual è stato il mio fattore scatenante, e da quel che so questo è il primo passo per poter elaborare, ma dopo?

Come si fa ad uscire dal tunnel? Come si fa a trovare la voglia di vivere?