u/Lost_Article_5530

Hello. I am a post grad student wondering how long I should wait before sending an email to professors again. I know everyone is very busy, and it might take some time to respond, but my anxiety skyrockets in the meantime. Normally because some of the professors instantly email back, so when it doesn’t happen I feel like I did something that they did not like, therefore they don’t want to spend time regarding my concerns.

Should I wait one day or two before re-emailing?

You can add yours, and here's some I've learned from exposure to social interactions.

"How are you?"

- The classic. Doesn’t really mean anything or doesn’t really mean they actually want to know how you are. It’s just an opening to a conversation.

"Generic weather statement"

- Just adding onto the opening sentence. I come from a culture where talking about weather isn’t common. So for the first few times, I actually thought people were interested to talk in depth about the weather we were having.

Aside from these, I don’t know what to add. I'm trying to learn human communication despite being a human my entire life.

My whole life has passed without making any meaningful relationships. I tried so hard to be there for my 'friends' who didn’t even consider me as their acquaintances. My loyalty and sincerity means nothing to anyone, yet I always see cunning people gaining that title by doing cunning stuff and using people at their advantages. My resentment has been build up so much that I hate the whole humankind as a whole. I never felt like I belong as a child, I never realised what was so wrong of me that no matter how good I am to people they never consider me as a good person, or even acknowledge me as a person. I felt so invisible even though I tried to make small talk, call them over the weekends to hang out with me, or invited them over to my house, they never thought of me as someone. I don’t feel real, I feel like a soul roaming around invisible. I don’t like humans, I see right through how cunning these people are, but these selfish people get the most out of the good things, the appreciation, the love, everything. I don’t want to hate the humankind, I just want to belong. How do I deal with the decades of built up resentment, because I am beating myself up emotionally every day.

Hello, I hope my question is not a stupid one.

To describe my query briefly, I am trying to write the literature review section for a paper. I have initial papers that helepd me detect gaps, and create my research questions. However those are not enough for a literature review/buildling up hypothesis. When you do a keyword search on google scholar or scoups, hundreds of papers show up. I like scopus in this regard, because you can screen them easily but google scholar doesn’t have that feature/have limited features. But also scopus tend to give me very limited papers, I found some good papers on google scholar that are relevant to my topic. But the problem is, how do I screen 200-300 papers? This will be quite time consuming. I roughly have 12 weeks for this project.

Any practical tips from your experience?

Hi. I couldn’t find a sub for Bangladeshis from abroad, so I'm posting this here.

I am an international student studying in one of the less popular study destinations. The Bangladeshi community here is small, but growing rapidly. When I arrived, I tried to be friendly to my flatmate, who used me when she got no one but quickly she was able to make friends and soon forgotten me when I moved. She doesn’t even recognise me or say hi or call, she only contacts me when she needs something so I cut her off.

But what I find strange is, I try to be nice to any Bangladeshi at my uni but they give me weird look and ignore me completely. I am going crazy because that didn’t happen to me when I was in my uni in Bangladesh. Every other Bangladeshi is talking, laughing, making friend groups with other Bangladeshis but somehow they all are ignoring me, even when I try to talk with them? Outright walk past me, talk over me when I am present, trying to interact? When I give any Bangladeshi a salam, most of them doesn’t respond me back.

I am not sure if it is a 'me' problem but trust me, Bangladeshis in Bangladesh aren’t this arrogant. But all Bangladeshis abroad have this weird narcissist complex. I don’t know why they are not responding to me but they are doing things together with others. This exclusion is really mentally affecting me in the worst possible way. And I don’t know why.

I'm currently doing unpaid duties at some customer service roles to gain experience. I met a very sarcastic/rude customer, I don’t know, the body language and tone was off. My fault was that I'm not a native English speaker and the customer's (native) accent was challenging to comprehend. I was not fast enough for this particular person. Everyone else was kind and appreciative of me, just this one interaction caused me to pass the duty to my coworker and take a washroom break cause I was on the verge of crying.

So how do you deal with scenario like this?

Any alternative jobs that require no human interaction?

Hi, so the title. I'm likely on a neurodivergence spectrum, and it’s super difficult to land a job. I've tried customer service roles, and here you are expected to communicate effectively. When you can't/ask lots of questions in repetition to clear up misconceptions the customers don’t take it lightly. So- any well paying jobs that doesn’t require human interaction? I have degrees in business/accounting.

I'm talking about all kind of jobs, from low-skill jobs to highly specialised ones. From retail cashier to CA/engineer/etc. How many of you did get a job without anyone to interfere (a referee) in the process? I mean, from application > interview call > job offer.

And how many of you took the advantage of other means.

I'm trying to see if I (someone with no links) can stand out in the crowd or not.

Any tips to get a job at McDonalds?

Hii. I'm an international student currently trying to get employment in the major food chains, one of them being McDonalds. Any tips on how to approach them? Is there a right time and situation to try to max out my luck? Most of the time I apply online but no response. I've visited the McDonald branches with my printed cv but the employees there act hostile when I try to ask them about vacancies.

Hi! My apologies in advance for imperfect writing skills.

I woke up from a dream, just an hour ago, it’s almost 6 am now and I am writing this here to have a discussion on this fascinating piece of vision. What I saw was that I was looking at the night sky, a mysterious vibe surrounding it which I couldn’t pinpoint. After a few moments I could see the giant globe floating far away, not the whole thing, but enough to realize it’s round. Just like how you would see the moon in the sky, except it was gigantic.

My feeling? I was moderately afraid, but I took the time to take a few pictures of the view, to show them to my mother. My heart was racing, and I felt like running to someone for shelter, because this unusual sight felt so real to me.

What's weird is, if I wanted I could zoom into the globe and see the maps of places with names on it. Even weirder, I zoomed into a place which was a spacious room and, seemed to contain 5 chairs, 4 white and 1 black colored. I forgot to check the location's name, but apparently in my dream, that room was a famous and important one, everyone knew about it? So weird. It was like some kind of corporate room where important business discussions are held.

The whole dream got me feeling a mixed emotions. Fear, fascination, sadness. Why sadness? I'm not sure, probably have to do with the fact that I am living far away from my parents in a different continent, and looking at the globe somehow triggered that feeling, although in my dreams my parents were in the same place as me.

One interesting fact, this is not the first time I saw gigantic space objects in my dream.

Edit: Please ignore the grammatical error in the title ><

Does anyone feel that way? When I used to be little, I fell behind peers of my same age. The gap was less noticeable.

Now fast forward to my adult life (in my late 20's), I feel like people my age are super-duper adults, whereas psychologically I stopped aging after 18, I'm not saying I'm super immature but I am as emotionally vulnerable as one. I would get along with the younger demographic, relate or have similar interests. After the age of 18 experiences shaped me to learn about the real world. So people my age (and younger) are already settled/have everything together/have clear goals and achieving them with no effort/adulting super efficient way. I feel like a little kid if I compare them with me. I still struggle to form sentences and stumble over words. People look at me weird/suspiciously when I speak.

I am sorry if my post makes no sense or disorganized I just wanted to know if anyone relate or have similar experiences.

Hi. I recently had an interviewer tell me that I have 'weak energy.' I applied for a retail role and was called in to interview twice within the span of a year by the same store manager. Both times, I was told that I have a weak presence and wouldn't be able to handle rude customers. Although I’ve been rejected after many interviews, no one else has ever told me that upfront.

To be honest, I’ve been going through a lot in life for a very long time. Now, with the added pressure of a failing marriage, that mental load shows on my face. Does this mean I will forever face rejection if my energy stays this way? I don't feel like I have control over how I appear to people, it's just who I am right now. How can I literally change my personality to remove this curse of unemployment? I feel so crushed. I was not born with the personality that hirers consider ideal, but I have to be hired if I want a roof over my head.

My (35 M) husband and I (28 F) have been married for 5 years. Our relationship started formally, no dating before marriage - only approval from parents, a few chats about ourselves, and a little bit of familial background check. I basically never dated anyone before and had no idea about what being in a relationship was about to unfold. I ignored what I was about to consider 'reg flags' later into our marriage while we were on the talking stage. This man is a textbook nonchalant man. My emotional needs are terribly ignored and there is no sort of affection from his side of our relationship. First three years I would cry my eyes out and beg him for love and affection. From fourth year onwards I started resenting him, constantly argued with him to grab his attention, because at that point I was craving any sort of reaction from him and arguing got me there. Moving forward to the fifth and current year, I lost the last bit of interest in him. I mean I still crave the attention, but a second later I think about all the disappointment and hurt he caused. I really want to end this, I daydream of the day I'm finally signing that paper. But he doesn’t want to end it. I am not sure what to do at this point. Do I stay patient until I get enough courage and have a clearer view of how things will turn out? Seeing his face brings me all sorts of emotional distress, and I find myself still begging him to even hold my hands affectionately. He is not a bad man just a emotionally distant one. He provides, just not what I value the most. I envy all of the couples around me whose husbands are affectionate and attentive.

Anyone else can feel this way? Constantly in a bad mood from being overstimulated, changing nappies, taking care of someone 24/7, poor sleep, no peaceful personal moment. Our marriage life has been declining ever since our baby was born and it has come to a point that there are lots of verbal insults, criticizing, purposefully degrading one another. Although he started this trend, he used to verbally abuse me and one can have so much patience before doing the same, I'm no saint. Our relationship has come to a point that all of these cannot be undone, I have so much resent built up but at the same time I really don't want to be alone, I just want to be loved and understood by my partner. I know our life has been facing a lot of stress, loneliness, financial hardships and I truly understand my husband, but it also feels unfair that all I ever wanted in my life is a loving relationship despite it all. Does it ever get better? Are we incompetent parents?

Hi everyone, hope you are all having a nice day. I apologise if my English isn’t good and if the flair is not appropriate.

So my partner had a scheduled interview today at KFC. He was all prepared and when he arrived, the staff (possibly senior staff?) told him the manager wasn’t available, and that he should come back next week. He was pretty disappointed because he was looking forward to this day. I'm having my doubts that the staff member didn’t actually tell the truth and she just wanted to send him away. And she will do that the next week as well. Did anyone have similar experience as this one? What was your approach, did you try again or not.

Hi all, hope you are doing well. I am very interested in getting into retail chain like the woolworths but I keep getting rejected on the first screening. I was wondering what redundancy is writing up the 'ethnicity' when applying for a role? Why does it exist? Doesn’t experience or expertise matter anymore?

I need my bills to be paid. I need a job to be able to pay my bills. Searching for a job feels like begging. I just want to work to live. What do I do realistically if I can't even find ways to pay my bills. Start a business? Been there, nothing happens.

Hey. I am really heartbroken today. Sorry I feel like I'm too sensitive but. Can I just vent for a little. I've been searching for part time jobs for months now. Why does every staff or manager or owner act so harshly when I try to drop my cv to their outlet? It’s not that I am trying to beg. They don't have to take my cv but they don't have to be mean about it.

If you don't like reading rants, I'm sorry because this will be a wall of rants.

I moved to abroad (not mentioning which country) with my spouse and kid last year as a student. The study pressure is unexplainable, I was always a below average student but my efforts kept me going. I thought I would be able to push through with my efforts alone, but it’s not enough, my fellow Bangladeshis who moved here are incredibly smart and capable, while I struggle with communication, networking and maintaining community. Long story short I am not a interesting person so people dont get along with me. I am beyond lonely and although I am an introvert I am craving for human communication. People here are 'posh' and I don’t meet the level of their 'poshness', I really miss people who were on my level back in my country. If I hadn’t spent all my life savings on this stupid decision I would've bought a ticket to Bangladesh yesterday.

Second, my spouse is incredibly incapable. Couples around us are smart, good teammates and very knowledgeable. I feel like I am carrying him while doing most of the brain works and it’s driving me insane. He speaks broken English, cant even read one sentence in English, cant apply for jobs without having me to help him. I don’t mind supporting him but I want to depend on him sometimes. I can't depend on him, I am losing my confidence and our relationship has become sour to the point we cannot stand eachother. I would like to know to what extent this relationship dynamic is normal. We used to be a happy couple back in our country but now not an ounce of that happiness is left.

It is my fault moving abroad, and even more my fault that my husband insisted on moving abroad while I tried to tell him this wasn’t a good idea. I am tired of being the main brain behind day to day everything.