u/Mundane-Beyond7644

im worried about this happening tbh and have already had one instance where it was almost an issue.

also is there anything i can do/say about security checking my bags even when bags are not banned…? can telling them its medical mean they wont look? should i tell them its medical even if they look, so they wont wonder why i have a ton of diapers and baby wipes?

would having a doctors note about my incontinence be helpful in these situations because i am thinking of getting one to carry in my bag

i have a few issues that i experience personally when changing diapers and pull ups in public, and i think pretty much all of them would be solved by having an adult changing table and a trash can available in every bathroom

the big problem is that not all places have hooks, which are necessary to put my bag on and get things out of it, but also even once i have a hook, i have to balance things like wipes and powder on toilet paper dispensers and other surfaces

in porta potties it’s especially bad. i am thankful that they at least provide accessible porta potties but basically… unless i want to leave my bag on the ground outside the potty or put it on the gross floor, i have to find someone to hold it and then carry my supplies in my hands. or just forego the wipes and powder because it would go on the floor anyway.

the other issue is having to lean against some mysterious public toilet stall or door to get a new diaper on. i am sure it won’t kill me but it still feels icky to me and it’s quite difficult still for me to change without something to brace myself on

then of course one always needs to have a trashcan to throw away used products

do you all have similar complaints?

and do you think that fixing these issues would be a reasonable accommodation to expect public venues to provide us? part of me feels i am being a little whiny since it’s not like anybody *likes* using public bathrooms

the title is basically the post. my bladder capacity is pretty small a lot of the time and often i can’t hold it long once i feel the urge. how am i supposed to do this test

hi it’s ru you may know me from my posts about how i’m refusing to let diapers define me.

i still stand by that but lately i feel ashamed of them. despite how much i try to feel confident and worthy and capable, i still feel that way sometimes. i want to be able to wear what i want without making a whole statement. i want to put on tight clothes without it being obvious what’s underneath.

i just feel pathetic and like a loser for not being able to do something so basic even tho i know that’s not how it works. i hope i stop feeling this way soon

i am starting college again with just one class in the afternoon after dropping out in freshman year and this will be the first time i am around my friends and other ppl my age while wearing protection. i know its not a big deal its just embarrassing

hi it’s ru you may know me from my posts about how i’m refusing to let diapers define me.

i still stand by that but lately i feel ashamed of them. despite how much i try to feel confident and worthy and capable, i still feel that way sometimes. i want to be able to wear what i want without making a whole statement. i want to put on tight clothes without it being obvious what’s underneath.

i just feel pathetic and like a loser for not being able to do something so basic even tho i know that’s not how it works. i hope i stop feeling this way soon

i am starting college again with just one class in the afternoon after dropping out in freshman year and this will be the first time i am around my friends and other ppl my age while wearing protection. i know its not a big deal its just embarrassing

how to decide if it’s a diaper day or pull up day?

basically what it says on the tin… i have no idea how to tell. like i know diapers should be for bad days and pull ups for good days, but HOW am i meant to know what it’s gonna be in advance…?

my bladder has been improving some since starting gemtesa, enough that im pretty sure i could handle pull ups on good days, but the problem is that it changes on a dime. i’ll have three accidents in three hours and then turn around and hold it for an entire shift at work (yes, while drinking water) right after that. had so many accidents this morning in pull ups and finally got fed up and switched to a diaper just in time for it to calm down and start acting right

having a hybrid approach to protection is supposed to both save my sanity AND save some money but it can’t do either of those things if i can’t decide when it’s gonna be more effective to use a diaper vs a pull up 🫠

(also for context for why it might save money: if i am in diapers, with my body shape there’s no way for me to pull it down or get out of it without untaping it entirely, and that’s really annoying when i have to pee as much as i do. so if im in diapers i just pee in them exclusively and only use the toilet for number two. so in pull ups, if i only have 1-2 accidents in a day, thats cheaper than peeing in diapers all day long)

basically what it says on the tin… i have no idea how to tell. like i know diapers should be for bad days and pull ups for good days, but HOW am i meant to know what it’s gonna be in advance…?

my bladder has been improving some since starting gemtesa, enough that im pretty sure i could handle pull ups on good days, but the problem is that it changes on a dime. i’ll have three accidents in three hours and then turn around and hold it for an entire shift at work (yes, while drinking water) right after that. had so many accidents this morning in pull ups and finally got fed up and switched to a diaper just in time for it to calm down and start acting right

having a hybrid approach to protection is supposed to both save my sanity AND save some money but it can’t do either of those things if i can’t decide when it’s gonna be more effective to use a diaper vs a pull up 🫠

(also for context for why it might save money: if i am in diapers, with my body shape there’s no way for me to pull it down or get out of it without untaping it entirely, and that’s really annoying when i have to pee as much as i do. so if im in diapers i just pee in them exclusively and only use the toilet for number two. so in pull ups, if i only have 1-2 accidents in a day, thats cheaper than peeing in diapers all day long)

i just bought baby powder for the first time and got the blue bottle of caldesene baby protecting powder from walmart. is this okay to prevent itching+rashes if i am only peeing in the diapers or do i specifically need the pink one bc it is “medicated” whatever that means?

ru again. this is the worst feeling and oh my gosh i hate it so much. how are u supposed to scratch an itch down there with thick padding over it ESPECIALLY in public 😭 this is why i need to be able to toggle my diaper on and off

View Poll

hello! this is ru again. i am 20F and got my first UTI about a year ago. ever since, my bladder has never been the same. it’s deteriorated a lot since it started and now i need diapers.

has anyone else had similar experiences and if so could you share your story and any advice? especially how did the incontinence progress with time

oh yes, btw, i dont currently have a UTI afaik. my culture comes back clear, and i am over a month into a two month course of antibiotics which are doing nothing. the antibiotic is cephalexin

hello! i am 20F and got my first UTI about a year ago. ever since, my bladder has never been the same. it’s deteriorated a lot since it started and now i need diapers.

has anyone else had similar experiences and if so could you share your story and any advice? especially how did the incontinence progress with time

oh yes, btw, i dont currently have a UTI afaik. my culture comes back clear, and i am over a month into a two month course of antibiotics which are doing nothing. the antibiotic is cephalexin

hello! i am 20F and got my first UTI about a year ago. ever since, my bladder has never been the same. it’s deteriorated a lot since it started and now i need diapers.

has anyone else had similar experiences and if so could you share your story and any advice? especially how did the incontinence progress with time

oh yes, btw, i dont currently have a UTI afaik. my culture comes back clear, and i am over a month into a two month course of antibiotics which are doing nothing.

this is just a vent and frustration about how diapers are viewed by society tbh. it’s fucked

i posted a series of recent outfits on a fashion subreddit with the waistband of my diaper peeking slightly out of my pants in several of them

i’m 20F and i like to dress in crop tops and shorts/skirts especially because it’s summer right now and hot. i have been trying to retain my fashion sense and confidence despite being in diapers now, and have been having fun experimenting with my clothes lately so i wanted to show off

i knew that the waistband would likely draw a couple “wtf… are those diapers?” which i was prepared for, but the reactions were nastier than i was anticipating

a couple people just ask me plainly and i told them i am incontinent, but then others in the comments started accusing me of lying about my medical condition and of being a fetishist who gets off on exposing others to my kinks and showing my diapers off on purpose.

one person pointed out how young i was and how rare it would be… 😐 yea thank u for reminding me lol. also it really isn’t that rare. told me “not to even try the ‘how can you tell from a few pics’”

another person even argued repeatedly about it on others comments and looked thru my post history, PLUS managed to correctly identify what brand and print of ABDL diaper i am wearing from just a blurry waistband photo and used that as proof i am faking (i do wear abdl diapers because they’re typically high quality and the prints make me feel cuter than medical brands)

honestly i know it is not the biggest deal and they’re just chronically online losers, but it still stings.

all im trying to do is express myself like anyone else my age is allowed to do. but because i’m my specific disability means i need diapers, and adult diapers are associated with old people or kink, people feel they are entitled to my personal details and to making comments about my body/my medical aids.

the stigma against diapers is honestly so disgusting and ridiculously overblown. they are not any bigger of a deal than a period pad (which the stigma on periods is also overblown tbh).

it is completely fucking inappropriate to act this way towards *anyone*, especially about a medical device. im not saying that there is not rampant ableism towards wheelchair users, but generally when someone is in public in a wheelchair, people do not constantly come up and act as if there is no discernible reason they could be using it other than kink. so why do diapers and incontinence get this horrible, toxic stigma around them???

we are human beings. we are full, interesting, developed people outside of our incontinence. we deserve to have the same freedoms, opportunities, and dignity/basic respect given to continent people. i should be able to post a photo of myself in a cute outfit and not have people trying to turn it into a debate about my private sexual life which is none of their business in the first place. incontinent people should be able to go out without dressing themselves in baggy clothes and constantly checking over their shoulders to make sure that nobody can tell

none of us should EVER feel pressured to fucking perform being ablebodied for others comfort and convenience.

what about us, who have to live with this 24/7? people act as if it is a switch we can flick when it’s convenient, as if diapers with my outfits are a strange fashion choice i’m making and not a necessity. this is my life, my reality, my all the fucking time. for people seeing the waistband, it is a brief, often forgettable moment.

i think that when people ask us to hide, to give things up for this disability, they forget what we’ve already given up. they forget this isn’t just one moment where we have to pass on opportunities because of this but just one more indignity in a long string of injustice. i’m not just being weird by not choosing a longer shirt, i’m choosing to not let incontinence take anything more from me in the ways that i’m able

and when they ask me to cover up, it feels like i’m being told to cover up not just my skin but who i am, in so many ways. i just want to feel cute and free to be myself. i want others to accept me for that, even if i know that not everyone will.

anyway all this to say that it really is just so baffling how diapers have ended up as the worst possible indignity a person could suffer. no, the real indignity of incontinence is not that we have to wear diapers. it is constant laundry, living in the bathroom, and refusing to go out for fear of incon acting up. it is having doctors push unhelpful medications and invasive procedures to ‘save’ incon ppl from resorting to diapers as a solution.

indignity is the fact that i cannot just wear what helps me and have it remain what it should be: a private, unimportant medical decision that is one of the least interesting things about me.

thanks for reading if you got this far, and hope this resonates with you if youre struggling with shame over your diapers or other products.

to end on a positive note, i just wanna encourage people to remember how many decent folks there are who do see diapers the way they should be seen: just medical devices. my friends, my family, my coworkers all reacted easily and with kindness to me telling them, and for every rude comment on my posts there was another complimenting my style. there are some nasty people out there, but there couldnt be darkness if there wasn’t light to compare it to.

this has been ru, and im going to start signing off my posts in this sub with my name so people who are here a lot will recognize me haha.

cya =^•w•^=