u/PrimalSaturn

I was walking with a mate, and then he bumped into his friend, they were talking, and so I pretended I got a call and full just made up a convo nearby to avoid just standing there with them.

I (m) met my LO a few months ago at uni, I felt a spark between us. 2 months in, he informs me has a gf, which I found weird because after talking for so long, why didn’t he bring her up before?

Even after my LO telling me he had a girlfriend and they have been dating for a year, my stupid ass brain convinced myself that he was lying and made her up to play hard to get with me LMAO.

My LO isn’t active on social media so there was no way for me to verify or check. But then last night at dinner he eventually showed me pictures of her and them together, I told myself “oh he probably just used ai to make them” 💀💀💀💀

Like my brain genuinely came up with every plausible scenario that she’s not real and that he made her up because he was testing me or didn’t want to seem available because he secretly liked me and wanted to keep the illusion that he was unavailable…

But then my LO and I went to networking event together and he was talking about her a lot and then it finally clicked that maybe she’s actually real and he actually does have a girlfriend.

My fantasy has been shattered.

I am genuinely fucked in the head. Even after concrete proof, my brain still doesn’t want to accept that he has a girlfriend and that he doesn’t actually have “secret” feelings for me…

Aquarians reminds us to focus and develop ourselves… that’s how they are humanitarian.

They remind us to love ourselves when they are absent and miss them.

I’m friends with an Aquarius guy who I have feelings for and I’ve told him and he said it’s cool and we should keep being friends.

But his actions have been a lot more engaging with me, we’re calling more, hanging out more, etc. but he will have periods of silence for days then comes back and the cycle continues…

So my question is, they dont really think or are aware of how their actions affects the other person? Because a “normal” person would be more considerate and be more mindful of their actions, right?

My Aquarius is taking time and space away from me, which I understand… but when they decide to come back, how long should I wait or give them more space before I reply to their message?

I don’t want to reply straight away but I also don’t want to wait a whole week… any advice?

Our friendship stresses me out, because I’m catching feelings for you.

I feel so peaceful when I’m not thinking about you.

I missed this peace.

Every hour was just thinking about you. How you looked, what you said, the electricity in our eyes. I always think of that.

The intensity when you got close to look at my computer screen.

The out of body experience when I bumped into you, you didn’t move like a rock.

Our physical touch. Or what’s little of it. Every millisecond analysed. Seared into my brain.

I could talk to you for hours. I want to talk to you for hours.

I’m a gay male who has gone NC (it’s been a few days now) on my LO (uni classmate) and I have resorted to masturbation and porn a lot more than I’d like to cope.

I feel like I’m treating one addiction with another and I know it’s not good for me in the long run.

I’d like to know if anyone has resorted to this to feel relief from their obsession, and if anyone has any advice for me. Please and thank you.

I (gemini) only have 2 weeks left of uni classes with him, and my infatuation with him was getting to a point where my mental health was severely being affected. He was doing intermittent reinforcement on me, using his problems as a way to keep me feeling obligated to support him and be there for him, and he was breadcrumbing me (giving me bits of attention, followed by large gaps of silence, and repeat).

I have decided I have had enough of this mental stress, and I just ghosted him and didn't show up to class, to which he messaged me 4 times, each asking where am I, are you okay, what happened, but I just did not respond.

I know if I respond, then the cycle will continue.

I am allowed to do what is best for me and my mental health, right?

What do you guys think of this?

I’ve started being friends with an Aquarius (I’m Gemini) and I can’t tell if his intelligence is “lower” than mine or if he’s playing at a high level where he’s playing dumb/acting less intelligent to gauge and see my reaction to things?

Like overall I think he’s a smart person but I feel sometimes he’s downplaying certain things or topics to see what I would say first?

Also another thing is grammar, sometimes his grammar is questionable which isn’t a big deal but he will say “loose” instead of lose, or he will say “where” instead of were? I’m wondering if this is intentional or?

well, i want to be his friend, i am being myself, this is how i am, i am going to do what feels authentic to me, and if this causes him to have a meltdown then so be it lmao (as a gemini person who has a crush on my Aquarius uni classmate) - this is in regards to msging him and asking him if he wants to hang out and study tomorrow

Or should I just hope and pray that it happens and I should text him when it’s closer?

We do text but I’m trying to keep our contact mainly in person as I find that we vibe so much more authentically in person as opposed when we text.

When I find myself deeply spiralling in thought of them, I ask myself “am I trying to fill in blanks that don’t actually need filling?”

For example, my LO is my uni classmate and we have class every Thursday.

So what I know for sure is that I will see him in class and have a good time because we really get along and he makes my class so much more enjoyable.

When I start spiralling and thinking about his life, what he does, who he’s with, reasons why we’re in love, our life together, etc. I think to myself “all I know for certain is that we will have class on Thursday” and every other thought beyond that is me filling in blanks that don’t need filling.

It really helps ground me and focus on what is actually concrete.

Is that what this all is at the core of it? Spending hours noticing the little details and analysing it as “proof” or “evidence” that they do like us back but reflecting on it now, it’s just so unproductive creating imaginary scenarios and eating it up for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Sure it MIGHT be true, and we wish it was true, but maybe that’s the allure of it? The possibility?

Ugh I need help.

The emotional stress and distress that I can get from my crush is helping me slowly lose the limerence and infatuation.

I am just exhausted overanalysing and overthinking about every little detail that I use to help build the narrative that they are secretly in love with me. When they clearly have a girlfriend (I’m a guy who has a man crush on my male friend and we’re both in the same uni class)

Just last night he randomly tells me he’s thinking of moving to another country with his girl and it was just random and hurtful.

I’m sure there’s a lot to the story that I’m leaving out so please let me know if you have any questions but this situation is really emotionally taxing and I want it to stop.

The emotional stress and distress that I can get from my crush is helping me slowly lose the limerence and infatuation.

I am just exhausted overanalysing and overthinking about every little detail that I use to help build the narrative that they are secretly in love with me. When they clearly have a girlfriend (I’m a guy who has a man crush on my male friend and we’re both in the same uni class)

Just last night he randomly tells me he’s thinking of moving to another country with his girl and it was just random and hurtful.

I’m sure there’s a lot to the story that I’m leaving out so please let me know if you have any questions but this situation is really emotionally taxing and I want it to stop.

I was infatuated with my crush for a month, we’re in the same class for uni, we’ve hung out on discord in a call a few times talking about project work and time always flew by, but I found out recently he has a gf which kills me.

I feel like I’m waking up to reality after being asleep and dreaming and fantasising about my crush so much. And the world is less colourful and joyful now.

I really enjoyed the “high” I got from having a crush, and now it’s like im sober and remembering how ugly the world can be again.

I was infatuated with my crush for a month, we’re in the same class for uni, we’ve hung out on discord in a call a few times talking about project work and time always flew by, but I found out recently he has a gf which kills me.

I feel like I’m waking up to reality after being asleep and dreaming and fantasising about my crush so much. And the world is less colourful and joyful now.

I really enjoyed the “high” I got from having a crush, and now it’s like im sober and remembering how ugly the world can be again.

It says that the orb can be controlled with her direction? What does this mean?