u/Successful_Shop4082

Ever since I was in middle school, I wanted to have a bulge. Like I would stuff my jeans with socks kind of thing. Now at 24 I still do want to have a dick.

Sometimes I sit behind my bf and pretend his dick is mine then play with it. I can kinda feel it mentally so this works quite nicely.

Of course I’m realistic. There’s no way I can grow a dick naturally. I WIISHSHHHH magic is real lol.

In middle school I used to wish I was a boy too, but yeah I repressed that side of me and go the opposite way and become very fem and slutty sometimes. I feel like if I’m tall I would start T but since I’m 5’1 I don’t think I’d make a very convincing man :(

Also my bf stated he won’t be attracted to me if I transition, which is understandable cuz he’s straight.

I dunno… now I don’t want to be a man tbh. I just wanna be a girl with a dick. Anyone ever felt the same?

Would love to hear your advice on marriage, kids, the ups and downs, prenups, finances, etc.!

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Context just in case its needed: I will be married in less than 3 months. Already living together with my fiance for almost a year now.

(Lots of generalization coming, so FYI this is based on my experience with 1 singular ENFJ)

Now I know why you guys are called “The Protagonist” lol. People love you, and you love people. It’s amazing how you make people feel special so naturally.

As an ENTP I have Fe too but it’s tertiary so it doesn’t come as naturally to me. It’s just amazing to see how Fe works for you.

Also your tertiary Se is so FUN when it’s channelled. You really know how to live life.

From what I gather, instead of knowing our authentic feeling, ENTPs process emotional situations through Ti logic and others’ moral/value (Fe).

Does it ever bother/frustrate you that you can’t know what you truly feel?

Maybe this is my Ti speaking, because I’m analyzing an emotional situation and I need this “authentic feeling” data but I don’t know how to access it so I’m kinda frustrated.

tw: nsfw? 18+ topics

F24 beberapa bulan lagi mau nikah. cowoku M31 dulu sering selingkuh online. dia sih ga ngakuin itu selingkuh ya krn dia anggepnya itu dia bayar orang dan gaada ikatan emosi.

dia ada fetish jd submissive jadi dia sukanya cewe” dominant. padahal aku pun bisa switch (walaupun submissive leaning). tapi dia masih cari” cewe di online.

ini udah lama aku tahu. tapi kita udah ke psikolog buat couples counseling. dan skrg dia udh bs blg dia 100% bakal udahan chat dan/atau beli konten cewe lain. intinya ada perkembangan lah makanya aku masih mau lanjut sama dia.

td ku lg liat2 email dia krn kerjaan, dan ngeliat notif twitter via email jaman 2023-2024 (ya emang jaman” dia lg rajin selingkuh). aku tahu itu chat bakalan dirty chat. tapi SAKIT banget waktu tau mereka ngomongin aku sebagai gf nya. dia disuruh kirim foto selfi aku lah, suruh foto pas lg melakukan seks sama aku lah, aku dikatain whore, dll. dari percakapannya sih kynya dia ga kirim ya (aku cuma bisa liat chat dari cewenya krn ini via notif email, akun twitter dia udh dihapus). cuma tetep aja aku baru tau ky gini ternyata chat nya :”)

intinya lg sakit hati banget. walaupun skrg dia udh ga chat” lg. rasanya kalo ngikutin kata hati aja aku mau packing baju, pindah ke bali deh idup baru aja. tp sayangnya superego ku masih cukup kuat ya, ga bs seimpulsif itu.

sumpah gamau nikah. tapi gamau batal nikah juga. dia bangsat. tapi dia udah berubah juga. tapi bisa aja berubah lagi jadi bangsat. gatau lah semua ini gambling. hidup gaada yg pasti. semuanya tolol termasuk saya

I (24F) work remotely for an overseas company. The working hour is 9-5 local time, BUT a lot of times I still think about work outside of my working time. It’s not out of necessity, but my mind just can’t seem to shut up. It’s like I don’t have a life outside of work.

My friends all told me I need a hobby. Tapi hobi apa 😭😭 I’m not sporty. Sebenernya seru sih kynya pilates, lari gtu biar kalcer dan gaya tapi I think personally I won’t enjoy it. Terus artsy things juga.. I don’t have the patience to finish my projects.

Tbh now I just spend my time scrolling Reddit/Tiktok or watching Youtube. If there’s an interesting series I’ll watch it but then again it’s finite and doesn’t really bring me.. any sense satisfaction(?)

Like I just want to move to a rural area (non racist ones are preferred), own a cow and a garden, live my life naturally as the universe intended without being stuck in this corporate hell (sry boss, thanks for paying me though).

Anyone have any advice.. or maybe pls let me know if you’ve went through a similar situation

TW: some 18+ things mentioned (nsfw, not for minors)

I’m 24 F.

I’ve known I’m attracted to women sexually since I hit puberty, like 10 years ago more or less. It was a source of shame for me for years.

Then when I was in college, I moved to another town. My uni friends were all open minded, so I felt really comfortable in my sexuality and don’t mind letting people know. I was actually confident in being bisexual for the first time in my life. I had a wild phase too where I really explored my sexuality with both women and men freely (mostly women tho). Previously in my hometown I’ve also slept with women but it was not that fun bcs I needed to lie to my parents about why I didn’t come home etc.

My wild phase ended when I met with my current fiance (he’s a he). I love him very much, and he’s actually really accepting of my sexuality. He allows me to have sexual relationships with women so yeah I guess I still explore here and there early on our relationship. But now after 3 years being with him, not so much. Especially after I realize this relationship is going to become more serious (a.k.a going to get married).

Our marriage will happen in 4 months (we’ve paid for wedding things too). But I realize I’m becoming more…. homophobic(?) to myself. Like now I’m very hetero-presenting. Femme looking with a fiance. Like I will pass as a hetero woman to anyone.

This is what I wanted when I was still in a closet in my hometown, to be fully heterosexual. And I’ve achieved it (at least that’s what it absolutely looks like). So I’d say in a way I subconsciously want to make that wish came true.

For context, to be attracted to men sexually, I used to train my brain. Watching lesbian porn until I wanted to cum, then switched to straight porn. Pavlov-dog thing. And it sure works. Only “downside” is it just didn’t erase my attraction to women.

Back to where I was saying I’m becoming more homophobic to myself. It’s like if I’m slightly turned on by women, I feel that shameful feelings again. Because apparently I still want to be fully heterosexual, and being a soon-to-be married woman is making me want to erase those homosexual feelings entirely.

I hate regressing like this. Even now if I remember my times with women, I felt shame and disgust.

This might be such a non-issue but I just wanted to rant and I don’t have any queer friends I can talk to about this. Any advice is welcome! :)

And why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Sorry it needs 30 characters.

I see a lot of people type their mothers as ESFJ. Is this because of what society expects moms to be, therefore their personality changed to appear ESFJ-like overtime? Like I see a pattern here but dunno if it’s just a coincidence. Even I typed my mother as ESFJ.

I’m 24F. I have been experiencing auditory hallucinations since high school (as far as I remember). It’s not very often, and I know it’s not real immediately most of the time. The other times I decide it’s not real after doing some logical thinking.

Up until I was in middle school, I was afraid people can read my mind if they touch me. So I really really dislike touching shoulders or just touching people in general. If I was in public and touching people is inevitable, I would try to not think or think about completely unimportant things so people won’t know what I’m actually thinking. That was happening since I was probably 5(?) years old. I remember not wanting to sit on my mum’s lap when traveling because of this. I never told anyone about this and didn’t think of it as weird or paranoid.

Now I don’t have that kind of paranoia anymore, even though I still sometimes hear my teacher, my mum, my high school friends’ voices. I live in a completely new city, no way I should be able to hear their voices. And they are still alive so it’s not ghosts (pretty sure).

I mean I have been living like this for almost 20 years, and I’m able to hold a job and have a relationship. It’s not affecting me badly, just mild inconveniences.

What’s making me kind of afraid is if this condition would worsen with age, since I think it does get worse for some people. My mum’s dad (my grandpa) is schizophrenic, to the point that he assaulted my aunt and sent his d*ck pic to his daughters.

Open to any kind of opinion.. Thanks

I’m 24F. I have been experiencing auditory hallucinations since high school (as far as I remember). It’s not very often, and I know it’s not real immediately most of the time. The other times I decide it’s not real after doing some logical thinking.

Up until I was in middle school, I was afraid people can read my mind if they touch me. So I really really dislike touching shoulders or just touching people in general. If I was in public and touching people is inevitable, I would try to not think or think about completely unimportant things so people won’t know what I’m actually thinking. That was happening since I was probably 5(?) years old. I remember not wanting to sit on my mum’s lap when traveling because of this. I never told anyone about this and didn’t think of it as weird or paranoid.

Now I don’t have that kind of paranoia anymore, even though I still sometimes hear my teacher, my mum, my high school friends’ voices. I live in a completely new city, no way I should be able to hear their voices. And they are still alive so it’s not ghosts (pretty sure).

I mean I have been living like this for almost 20 years, and I’m able to hold a job and have a relationship. It’s not affecting me badly, just mild inconveniences.

What’s making me kind of afraid is if this condition would worsen with age, since I think it does get worse for some people. My mum’s dad (my grandpa) is schizophrenic, to the point that he assaulted my aunt and sent his d*ck pic to his daughters.

Open to any kind of opinion.. Thanks