u/Trans_Pyra

IG: The Unraveling

He been a leftist but recently stop taking apart of the Nevada politics because of an small incident. He will explain it. This was doing Alexis Hill campaign. He doesn't mention it but he have confirm it a day later. Honestly, this is just dumbest way to stop supporting someone just because one minor incident. This is my problem with leftist. No backbone whatsoever. Like for example, you are doing a interview and they served you tea. Then they tell you it was made from Israel. You just didn't respond and continue with the interview. After the interview is public, some people will just quit and get death threats because you had tea made from Israel. Because of that, whole campaign is dead. Even the campaign talk about being against Israel and again, that one minor incident killed their chance at winning. Then we get a Democrat we don't like as much and Republicans wins once again. Is this the timeline I'm seeing in November?

Like understand, I sending you all a message here. It like tough love message. Leftist need to have a spine to vote for Democrats you want by focus on this people together. Then in the general, vote for the Democrats. No backing down! No protest vote! No excuses! Understanding the risk of you don't. You are getting that Date center and more ICE at your backyards. More MAGA agenda like in red states. More anti trans laws in Nevada. Less education and more crimes. This that what you want to your kids? To the trans people or immigrant promising to protect them? Are you going to let them down and cause more pain and suffering by the Republican empire? If no, reach all people. Democrats and independent. If conservative vote Democrat too, so be it. This is make it or break it moment here. This will be a snowball effect towards the 2028 presidental election. We need to keep Nevada purple at worst and blue for the best outcome.

So my original point was to show how leftist break easily. This election, I want everyone to prove me wrong! This is my wish to you all. Beat the Republican empire like Lombardo and turn Nevada Blue! Become better then California. Become the top blue state! Prove at one point, we work towards progressive leftist like socialism.

I'm am Japanese trans woman living in the US over 20+ years. I moved here when I was 6-7 (funny 😮‍💨) years old. My mother thought I need a better live then Japan. I first it was until 5th grade. 😮‍💨 I was a joke by the whole class. I was too happy I guess and kept calling me "gay" (Back then at least for me, happy meant happy or something. This was like 2007) I don't have any other Japanese people to talk to other then my family. I had no one. I was alone. Honestly, this is day, I still have PTSD and never forget it. Middle School is when "Suicide" was slowly became an option. I don't remember middle school much or none at all. Just I had a "friend" always brought about how I should end myself for "The dishonored of my family to end myself." 🤮 Like, I was stuck with him because of the school bus. Also my dumb butt thought it was just a nothing burger until he learn about my transition and many years later and proof, gone. High school senior year is when I did go to the counselor and told about my suicidal thoughts and feeling. They question me and send home. My parents talk about it and try to help but really it didn't help much. So yeah... Racism to Japanese people did exist still doing that time period. ( Other PTSD moments involving men. Let just say it's really bad.) Last part to add here was with COVID happened. Rare times I got blamed for COVID even though Im Japanese and I guess other Asian like Chinese people lookalike.

So when I transitioned at age 26, I was happy with my new life until current timeline. My with BPD and PTSD and Anxiety, all kicking at the same time, death is the only option to end this nightmare. I'm so paranoid daily. I doubt myself so much that, I question myself if why I even exist in the first place. Why live in a society that never want to change. Racism, Bigotry, Discrimination never tend to end any time soon. Billions of lives ruin just because people exist. Even nature and animals are effected by it. We have short live spam. Even what we do just disappear into the wind, forgotten unless you be a hero or something. People who have hate in their heart also in power as well. Control how we live out lives for the worst. Why live in survival mode? No one knows after death itself. Maybe good, or maybe bad. Is it better then the hell you are going though. From the time I started to live in the US to current timeline. This is the results I learned. Hatred never ends.

Maybe this is my paranoia talking again. Maybe my BPD or PTSD or Anxiety. In the end, this is my mindset that never leaves.

I'm a 29TW and I don't know if still have gastritis or something worse. Since last July, my stomach been hurting so bad that I had to leave work because of the pain. Like I only can stand for 5 minutes or I just start throwing up. I even have times, the pain goes extreme and I'm on the ground begging for the pain to stop. It felt like someone is squeezing my stomach very hard. No stomach prescribed medicine worked. It goes away on its own after a while was my only option. Even at the hospital, they gave me all of the different stomach medicine and didn't work at all. When I had an injection of Hydroxyzine Hydrochloride my stomach pain went away for a while but it just still coming back. I did a EGD and been diagnosed with Gastritis. That was last September. Everything changed when I move to Japan.

I have 0 clue why but since February, my stomach gotten way worse. Like the pain won't go away. Wake up with it and try to sleep with it. I tried Japanese OTC medicine but again, didn't work. I can drink fluids fine but foods is a problem. Like if I don't eat, pain. If I eat, pain. Also my Anxiety, BPD, Major Depression, PTSD, Gender Dysphoria more likely causing it as well. Recently, I'm getting air trapped in my throat too. Nausea to dry heaving then vomit. Even I have times my heart hurts too. I just don't know what to do. Like I can't even go outside with this pain. I don't know what to do? Last year, I been tested with CT scan multiple times and nothing. One time, one CT scan thought they saw something and I needed surgery but it was a false alarm but that didn't solve my stomach pain. To this day, I'm getting more scared that I might have stomach cancer or something. Since I don't have insurance in Japan because I don't work here. So going to the doctor is going to be expensive. In the bottom, I will give my symptoms of what I'm going through and another on my medicine I take that might also be a problem as well.

Symptoms

- Stomach pain

- Nausea

- Vomit

- Dry Heaving

- Heart pain

- Air trapped in my throat

- Fatigue

Medicine

Estradiol-2mg-three daily (HRT)

Spironolactone-100mg-two daily (HRT)

Progesterone-200mg-one night (HRT)

Finasteride-5mg-one daily (HRT)

Happy AAPI month. I want to talk about Japanese women. Yes I am a Japanese TRANS woman but I still want to shine a topic not enough people talk about.

Japan is one of a go-to tourist destination. The foods, nature, cultures, etc. Wonderful people with smiles and kindness. But there is a gender war culture still to this day. Because of the conservative country it is, they never really give too much protection to them. That is why like the Pokemon Center murder happen. Begged for help from police, nothing. Even her work at the Pokemon Center just told her to leave but the stalker ended up killing her. Like how conservative men talk in the US does match to Japanese men. Toxic work culture, harassment even your just a middle or high schoolgirls. Like my Japanese mother told me a story about how young girls and women get tricked into adult videos aka porn. I don't know that is 100% true but make sense to me. With all of the animes to Hentai, wouldn't of shock me much.

Let's get to the US part. I lived in the US over 20+ years. I only transition for 3.5 years. So I don't have again cis girls/women experience but I do have cis boys/men side of grossness they have said to me. Let's start with racism. Before the Springfield cats and dogs was a thing, I was accused of eating cats and dogs in my childhood. So, in early 2000's, people learned about Korea and China had restaurant uses cats and dogs. This was like maybe 2005-2006 maybe timeline. So, I didn't have a smartphone to fact check or understand English as well. I move here when I was 6 or 7 years old. I was asked in school. I just no so many times. I had no other Asian to defend me. I only had myself. They asked me about Pearl Harbor and the Nukes. My family wasn't near the nukes or in the interments camps so Idk. Couldn't answer that as well. Let just say this kept on going for long time. Because of this trauma, I have PTSD. (I have a lot more but this going to get too long.)

The sexism part. Japanese girls/women are viewed as "dream wife" to America men. The "hot sexy wife." The ones they watched one too many anime or Hentai. Compare to cis girls/women, I know they get it way worse then I can imagine. I had my moments too about sexual harassment in a workplace. How one person spanked my ass to try to kiss me. He can speak English and Spanish so at times, he spoke in Spanish at things to the co-workers. All my co-workers knows about how I am trans. I'm very open about that. (I rather not hid it or I just become the next trans panic case story.) This was one of my few sexist moments.

(Edit: I wanted to add about U.S. bases in Okinawa and their rape culture there. It's really bad. Like how US men "dates" minors girls. A problem no one really talk about enough. Learn the history about this.)

I'm sorry for being long post. I just want people to have awareness for the Japanese women. This was more focus on Japanese cis women compared to Japanese trans women. I will make another post more focus on Japanese trans women side. So please, don't just learn only about Japanese women, learn more in the AAPI community this month.

Their crazy with their "gender." Away from normal people. God, can teach you to behave and detransition. He can save us all.

/uj 🤮 But honestly thought, put in a straight jacket in a padded cell really can make a girl turn on. It's like dream home to me. My kink side of me talking. Bondage is one of my favorite BDSM. I don't do light bondage, I prefer heavy bondage. Anyways, straight jacket for gender dysphoria doesn't make sense.

This is only a dream because I don't think mental hospital use straight jacket. Maybe a padded room but 🤷‍♀️. Funny because I been in three different mental hospital and two of them I saw was more just an empty cell for misbehaving patients and I only saw it used once for a cis man/woman who didnt want to wear paper scrab shirt. This person was big and tall. So their were struggling and screaming. Don't know how long this person ends up staying there. Like it's in the same hall where we sleep. Also one person was watching the whole time.

Maybe their is a place exist where they still use it but the straight jacket more likely saved for kinky people. Too many lawsuits if you where it too long. How hot it gets to your arms will starting really bad. To a point, you can't feel your arms. Like it gets numb and that is not a good thing. I was fine after release.

I was in the mental hospital for suicidal ideation. Even I hired myself, they never did put me in any restraints. So for gender dysphoria is a wayyy dumber reason to be restraint. Just saying...

I been to three different mental hospital and none of them really help me at all. Just talk to a doctor and get pills. Every day and that about it. The rest just TV in the day room or color. Talk to other patients and walk on the hallway. It was very boring. Sometimes a tech does talk to you if you are balling down crying. Other times, they just tell you to don't lay on the ground on the hallway and go to your bed to do that. Even get dragged by the techs if needed (I know because I have as well.) Since you get mixed with other patients who are detox or other mental health reason, my mental health is more ignored. At least on all the hospital, they did be supportive of my gender as a trans woman but honestly how they separated us I think by risk assessment. Like two years ago, it was more gender separated. I don't know what changed that.

End of the day, I wish mental hospital do more resources to people like me who have bad thoughts in their head. Not, figure it out yourself.

As an Ace Transbian, I been having thoughts on attraction itself. To love this person for looks or kindness. Sometimes it might lead to gay/lesbian. Sometimes, it might be Bisexual/Pansexual. Why do we have this feeling of looking at a someone body, it makes your body weird? This "love" feeling. For me, I don't think I understand love. I think I'm giving it but I just don't know. Can people explain this attraction feeling that make you fell in love with someone.

I been having stomach problems again recently. Im not sure if hrt is the reason why. Every time I take it after three hours, the pain starts. That and nausea. I will be in toilet throwing up empty. I been in hospitals multiple times and nothing. Seeing GI and gastric is what I been diagnosed with. But that was last August when I was tested. I still have this pain. I was off hrt because I was getting top surgery and the stomach pain was gone for that month. When I started taking hrt again, this pain return. Is it hrt fault or something else. This is the list what I take below

Estradiol-2mg-three daily (HRT) (Pill)

Spironolactone-100mg-two daily (HRT)

Progesterone-200mg-one night (HRT)

Finasteride-5mg-one daily (HRT)

Edit: I also been taking HRT over 3 years and this level of doses for I think 2 years now.

I don't like Garlic bread! I hate it! I hate it! I HATE IT! I don't like any bread. No bread sticks, white bread, chocolate chip bread, etc. I eat rice as my grain. Hell, I will eat it with the lasagna instead of garlic bread. I'm committing food terrorist crime. Rice with lasagna. No one is going to stop meeeee!