▲ 29 r/Muppets

Tell me your muppet headcannons i wanna laugh

Ill start

Gonzo wears Warm Vanilla scented perfume from bath and body works because he wants to stand out for camilla (chickens dont have good senses of smell, and the smells they do like are more familiar and warmer scents like)

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 14 days ago
▲ 109 r/Muppets

I do not like kermit and miss piggy as a couple

Honesty, if their ship has no haters, im dead

I used to like it when it was clear that it was 1 sided and probably not gonna happen, but when it became a will they wont they and a genuine chance they'd get together, thats when I stopped liking it.

I hate to be one of those people, but if Miss piggy was a man and kermit was a woman, nobody would like them as a couple

u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 14 days ago

What was the most fucked up "movie" youve ever watched, and how old were you when you watched it?

I say "movie" because a lot of these are just barely disguised fetishes, like anything lucifer valentine thinks of (i watched one of his films when I was 12, I hate my life)

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 18 days ago

So in south park, tweek is so anxious and panicky because of his parents putting meth in his coffee, but how would an actual kid react to digesting bits of meth every day?

This just randomly popped into my mind while watching south park. Im NOT googling ts

Also, when i say meth, i mean the meth tweek is given (im assuming its a type of street meth like crystal or speed)

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 24 days ago

I wish for one crunchwrap supreme from taco bell, and for it to land directly in my hand when it spawns with no extra ingredients, just a normal crunchwrap supreme

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 25 days ago

Im so disgusting

HUGE TW

I was sexually assaulted when I was 12 and saw porn when I was 10. Ever since then, my body just wants it over and over again even when im trying to sleep or at school. I feel like im stuck in a body with Stockholm syndrome and I genuinely want to throw up from some of the thoughts I get. Im feeling especially disgusting because today me and my friend were going to have sex, and when she canceled last minute, the thoughts just came back. I hate thinking like this so much and I just want it to stop

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 1 month ago
▲ 13 r/Vent

Im so disgusting

HUGE TW

I was sexually assaulted when I was 12 and started seeing porn when I was 10, and everyone since then, my body just wants it over and over again. I feel like a mind trapped in a body with Stockholm syndrome. It wont stop, and I've lost sleep and skipped school because of the urge. Ive started to feel especially disgusting because today me and this girl were going to have sex with each other, but she canceled last minute. I will respect her wishes, of course, but its making me think disgusting things and I genuinely want to throw up. I want it to stop so badly, I dont want to think like this.

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u/Whole-Jackfruit-2397 — 1 month ago