u/littleredbird1991

So my aunt and her husband recently decide to divorce after almost 40 years. The reasons are not important but the divorce is going well.

Well, apparently my ex-uncle’s sister contacted my aunt and asked that since they were divorcing could my aunt return the gift she bought them. Apparently she bought them a coffee maker. Back in 1987. That thing had long since died and gone to the dump. When my aunt told her ex-SIL that it was gone her ex-SIL asked if my aunt could buy her a new one to replace it. Apparently my aunt has not responded to this request yet, but my family group chat is enjoying roasting this woman for her audacity.

UPDATE:

Wow, thank you all for the replies. I passed on the idea of getting an old broken Mr coffee to give the ex-SIL. My cousins seemed to love it and started looking online for an old busted one. My Aunt (the one who is divorced) said that while she thought the idea was funny she was going to tell the ex-SIL if she needed anything to contact her brother (ex-uncle) and then block her.

Sorry it’s not the funnier ending but y’all gave my family a lot to joke about in the group chat (better than what we were normally talking about)

I went to a wedding this past weekend of a family friend. It was a garden wedding and would probably have been perfect if it hadn’t been for the shoes the bride chose to wear.

The bride is really short, like 5’2” tops and the groom is like 6’4”. Apparently the bride wanted to be on the same level of the groom so she wore what I can only describe as “hooker heels”. They were about 7 inch platforms. Apparently she would wear flats for the garden reception but for the ceremony she was going to wear the platforms.

Now these shoes are problematic under the best of circumstances (walking on pavement or indoors) but the ceremony was taking place in a grassy area. With a fabric covered walk way.

The bride was wobbling, badly, as she was walking down the aisle, but just before she got to the alter, her ankle gave out and she fell. Everyone freaked when the bride didn’t get up right away. Eventually they got a chair and she and the groom did the ceremony seated.

To her credit, the bride stayed for the whole ceremony and reception, but they didn’t do the first dance or father/daughter dance.

Apparently she did break her ankle (my mom found out from the bride’s mother). And the couple had to postpone their honeymoon.

So if you are going to do a garden wedding, do flats or at least sensible heels.

So, I woke up early and though I’d treat myself to some delicious donuts this morning. There is a little donut stand that is about 5 blocks from my house so I decided to walk there and pick up some. When I got there I decided I wanted the apple fritter for me and a couple smaller ones for my husband.

I looked the clerk in the eye and confidently ordered the apple fritter and the chocolate sprinkle ones but my brain froze when I wanted to order the filled powdered donut. Instead of asking for the powdered donut or the filled donut I confidently asked

“And can I get the one that looks like cocaine?”

Thankfully the person behind the counter figured out which one I meant because my brain was not working. I didn’t even realize what I had said until I was walking away and had already paid for everything.

TL;DR shoulda ordered the coffee before the cocaine donuts

My friend recently got hit by a car while on her bike, so I am walking her dog, Pedro, for her while she is on bed rest. Pedro is a 5ish year old rescue mutt that is about the size of a collie (he has similar coloring but short fur). He was severely abused as a puppy, so he is not the best around humans. He has been known to snap when people he doesn’t know grab for his face.

I was walking Pedro in a dog park on a short leash when I see a mom and a couple of small kids walking towards us. One of the kids (under 4) starts running up to Pedro and I with her arms out stretched yelling “puppy”. I didn’t know what to do since the mom seemed to be enjoying her phone more than watching the kids. Pedro started backing up and growling at the girl as she was running towards him, so I put my body between her and Pedro and kind of tripped her while trying to move Pedro along. The kid fell and started to cry. The mom (or who I am assuming is the mom) looked at me and said “why tf did you do that.” I told her “the dog was growling and will bite” all while trying to keep Pedro moving. As we passed her the little girl tried again to grab for Pedro but he nipped at her, which caused her to cry.

The mom started to yell at me but I was still walking past her, when I turned back and said “told you so”.

Later I told my friend what happened and she said that I shouldn’t have tripped the child and that Pedro is a nipper not a biter. Pedro is such a sweet dog who has been through a lot and I didn’t want anything to happen to him.

EDIT:

First to answer a question I keep getting. Yes I said no to the kid running toward Pedro and me, but it came out more as a “nononononono” then trip.

Also, Pedro is not my dog, but I did email my friend a couple of Amazon links to muzzles. I will take Pedro on a back road tomorrow where we are unlikely to meet other people.

Pedro is also on a short leash. He is not on a retractable leash and I was keeping him close to my body.

I have rabbits. I am beholden to my buns so I’m not exactly sure about dog walking rules.

I am just trying to help my friend out.

Pedro is a good boy who went through hell. I will talk to my friend about getting him more help with his aggression

So I am waiting in the airport to meet a friend who broke his ankle while on vacation (so I can help him with his bags and stuff). And there is a woman sitting in the arrivals area with a full on casserole.

Not a cake, but something that looks like a lasagne but smells more chili like. It smells delicious but I’m wondering why she would bring it to pick up someone from the airport? Like, aren’t you going to a place where you can eat the casserole after the airport?

At least the arrivals area smells nice now.

I was at a baseball game last night and there was a family with 4 small children with them behind me. After the game was fireworks, and one of the songs that was choreographed to was “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus. The mom said to one of the little girls “Honey, isn’t this your favorite song?” And the little girl responded

“Mom, that was my favorite song last year, I’m 6 now, I’m not a little kid anymore”