u/suprisedpikachumeme

i’m 19f, currently 270 something pounds and my height is 5’3. i want to lose weight, mainly so i can wear more cool clothes, but i’m also afraid to. i don’t feel as insecure as i used to, i really like the way my face looks, but im worried that’ll change if i lose weight. im also worried about loose skin.

my mom suggested talking to my doctor about Wegovy, and im conflicted about if i really want to do it or not. I know my health will be at risk if I keep gaining weight, but i’ve been obese for so long i got used to it.

when i was 9-10 years old, i had an online friend group full of a bunch of other kids, there was a lot of drama in our friend group and these kids were mentally ill.

they would talk about self harm a lot (stuff like “i’m cutting because of someone in the friendgroup” or “if you cut i will too”, or just simply saying they were gonna cut or kill themselves). i remember one day this was happening i decided to self harm as well, they weren’t encouraging me to do it or anything but for some reason i thought i should do it too because they were? i don’t know, i was 10

it was hard to deal with, but i understand these kids were struggling and i don’t blame them at all. i also would sometimes talk to my friends about wanting to self harm completely unannounced when they probably didn’t want to hear it, i know not to do that now

i just got reminded of this, again i don’t blame the kids at all and i really hope they’re doing better now

i don’t have an eating disorder, i put the content warning since i don’t want to trigger anyone who does struggle with any kind of eating disorder.

even though i don’t have an eating disorder, i’ve been having thoughts of engaging in dangerous eating habits since i was 10, so 9 years. i never actually did anything besides trying to restrict calories in january but i couldn’t keep up with it for more than a day. i don’t even hate my body as much as i used to and i have enough control in my life, but i keep wanting to engage in these habits. i want to lose weight but for some reason i don’t want to do it in a healthy way, i don’t really know why. i know how bad these behaviors are but i can’t stop wanting to engage in them. i can’t engage in them though, i don’t live alone and i don’t want the people i live with to worry about me

when i was 10 a guy sexually harassed me online and i think he was trying to groom me (i doubt myself sometimes) and i keep wondering if he did this to anyone else, i know it’s very likely but i don’t know for sure, i don’t know his name or what he looked like so i have no way of knowing if he did this to anyone else, and his skype username was a bunch of random numbers so i doubt anyone would remember his username (i only remember it because i have screenshots)

also if you’ve seen a similar post before i keep posting about this since it’s on my mind quite a bit

my dad is in prison for SA of a child, he’s set to get out in august. i still talk to him and i feel bad that i do, i hate what he did.

i’m also worried about him, he usually calls us every day but he hasn’t contacted any of us since wednesday which is unusual for him. i don’t know if there’s something wrong with the phones/tablets but if not then i’m afraid something might’ve happened to him. i keep overthinking. i shouldn’t feel worried about someone so horrible but i do and i shouldn’t talk to someone who traumatized multiple kids but i do

i just turned 19. and i’ve been uncomfortable saying i’m that age. i’ll be 20 next year, and for some reason that scares me. 18 scared me too, but i got over it eventually, but now i’m scared of being 20 and i wish i wasn’t 19. i have no idea why i’m so scared of getting any older, but i am. even when i was 13 i had these weird feelings about my age, i felt so old back then and i wanted to go back to being a little kid, and now i wanna go back to my early teen years lmao. idfk, i just wish i couldn’t age anymore.

i know 19/20 is still young and i don’t think those are old ages by any means but i’m just scared of turning 20 i guess idk

i’m an adult, but i was diagnosed with depression and anxiety at 10 years old. i see people online saying kids can’t be depressed and it genuinely makes me mad because yes, they can. not every child’s life is full of sunshine and rainbows all the time, when i was 10 i was admitted to two separate mental hospitals in the span of just a month, children struggle too and im tired of people invalidating them.

when i was 10 i remember telling someone i had anxiety because i was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder, they said “you’re 10, what do you have to be anxious about, not going to toys R us?” and it upset me, obviously. i wish people understood that kids have problems too, not just adults.