r/irishmammiesanddaddys

So, I have a daughter and the question has came up which toilets do I use when my daughter is old enough to use them.

As a father, do I take her in the Males? Or do I take her into the Females?

It seems to be a common discussion. Me being a Dad, I don’t think I’d personally feel comfortable going into the females just in case I caused alarm or for any females to worry about me invading their private space, but then I wouldn’t want my daughter feeling uncomfortable also by knowingly going into the Males.

Hi mammies and daddies!

Due our second next May and starting to think about what we’ll need to pull together especially with Black Friday etc coming up. I’m wondering about double buggies and if they’re worth it. My son will be 2 1/2 nearly to the day when baby arrives and currently loves his buggy. Ironic when he literally wouldn’t go into it when he was small 😅

I’m conscious of trying to wrangle two kids and also don’t want him feeling that a baby booted him out of his buggy when they arrive. At the moment I don’t think he’d be great on a buggy board but obviously it’s a ways away until they arrive so he could be a different kid by then.

I was looking at the Bugaboo donkey thinking at least I can use it as a single if we don’t need the double, and sell our current travel system (Mamas and Papas Ocarro).

Would love any thoughts or suggestions, I’m a bit overwhelmed by all the moving pieces here!

Edit: wow lads wasn’t expecting so many responses thank you! I’ve read them all but won’t be able to respond to everything (1st trimester kicking my butt lol), but seems the general consensus is it depends on our family and to buy secondhand 🤣 I’ve set up a few adverts alerts now so may hang on and see closer to the time how much my son still loves his “bram”! Thanks a million all, what a great resource this page is.

Can anyone advise me what would be a good age for my child to start crèche? I don’t have very much help. Definitely don’t have a village. I’m not trying to go back to work full time I’m just wondering what age it might work for the purpose of my child getting to socialise and play with other children and also for me to get a small bit of a break. Is there an option to do maybe a few hours 3 days a week? Or must one commit to 5 half days at-least? Sorry if these are silly questions I’m so clueless about this. Also wondering what’s the difference between preschool and Montessori and how organised must I be about getting on a waiting list? I feel like I need to have some kinda of plan and to know when I’m going to have some small bit of free time back in order to help me survive the stage I’m at now

EDIT: I put babies name on multiple crèche and preschool lists when I was pregnant. Have already been offered and refused one crèche place as I don’t need it yet.

I guess there isn’t any option for childcare for a few hours a few days a week prior to my child being eligible for ECCE? I’m struggling with SAHM life…..I definitely don’t work to go back to work full time or put baby in full time crèche just looking for other options for small breaks

Just got sent a voice note that’s apparently going around mam WhatsApps about the Lidl wooden toys and I am HOWLING 😭 some mam has a map of the stores and is trying to assign everyone areas to cover??? Is it that intense??

As the title says, if you have tried the kits could you share your experience?

She has been refusing anyone’s care but mine. Wants to be picked up and carried everywhere, refuses to play on playground sometimes. I am exhausted. I know this time separation anxiety peaks, but I can’t stand it. It has been for 4 months like that.

Hi all, we have 3 under 4 and expecting no 4 in the next year, so the value we think is there for buying on the better quality side.

We have been looking (for ages) at the likes of Gepetto / andrews garden furniture/ backyard playhouses etc and have a fair idea of what we'd like for our own place.

Our question is this-to anyone who has them, did your kids play with the wooden house on the platform, or in hindsight did you think they could have done without it and only went with the tower kind? There's a fair difference in price between the two so we're thinking we'd love them to get the use out of it otherwise add in something else to the set up.

Thanks in advance for any advice, experiences or recommendations!

Looking for someone to volunteer for an infant observation in/around London!

I am a career changer with a background in academic philosophy. I am currently studying to retrain as Child Psychotherapist. I am myself a father to a 8-year-old child. I currently work at a SEN school and volunteer with Samaritans. As part of my studies I have to observe an infant during the first two years of their lives.

Observations would take place roughly once a week, although there is a lot of flexibility. I would stay in the background and quietly observe your baby’s development in their natural environment. My role would be empathetic completely non-judgmental, focusing on listening to you and observing the interaction between your baby and you (or someone else caring for the baby during my visit). The observation would happen strictly within the limits you are comfortable with (for example, I could leave the room during breastfeeding). While I would like to observe your child until they turn 2 years old, you are of course free to drop out at any time.

Parents who have had this experience have found it emotionally beneficial and therapeutic. It has also helped them reflect their relationship with their baby in meaningful ways.

If you would like to support child psychotherapy training, and think you might benefit from infant observation, or are simply curious and would like to know more, please dm.

I’m based in London but willing to travel.

Hi everyone, hoping someone familiar with Irish maternity leave rules can clarify this for me.

I’m based in Ireland. My original due date was 19 October 2026, and my maternity leave was due to officially start on 5 October 2026. My original return-to-work date was therefore 4 April 2027.

However, I went into labour on 16 September and my son was born on 18 September 2026, before my maternity leave had officially started.

I informed HR about the birth, and they have now adjusted my maternity leave/return date and are telling me my new return date is 18 March 2027.

My understanding is that Ireland has specific provisions for premature births where maternity leave is extended by the period between the baby's actual birth and the normal date maternity leave would have commenced.

Does anyone know how this should be calculated?

Am I correct that because my son was born before my maternity leave was due to start, I should receive an additional period of maternity leave for the premature birth, rather than simply having my original 26 weeks counted from 18 September?

I’m particularly confused because HR have moved my return date to 18 March, which is actually earlier than my original 4 April return date.

I’d really appreciate if anyone who has dealt with this in Ireland could explain how the dates should work, or point me towards the relevant legislation/WRC guidance.

Thanks!

Hi everyone. Ever since my little boy was around 9/10 months he has been well able to self settle for sleep. We would follow the same routine at nap and bedtime and pop him in his cot and off he’d go. He hasn’t always been the best sleeper at night but always good at going down.

Anyways about 3 weeks ago he started refusing nap and bedtime, I think he may have went through some type of regression I’m not sure, and I’m not even sure if it’s over! His nights wakes have gotten better but he still won’t self settle. I’m trying here today for his nap, going in and out reassuring him he’s ok etc, but he just keeps standing up in cot giving out and throwing his dummy and teddies across the room.

We resorted to holding him to sleep when this all kicked off simply to survive, but we’re now at the end of our tether with this too and want to get him back into good habits.

Would anyone have any advice on how to help him get back into self settling again at this age? Feel he’s so much older and wiser now it makes it harder!