u/1729yH

I have a driving license but I am a very anxious driver and soon I may have to drive alone (which I have never done before). Has anyone got any advice on how to stay focused? Does anyone use white noise in earbuds / speaker to help be less overhwlemed when driving? I am thinking of trying white noise as usually I need background noise or music to do absolutely anything and i usually use noise cancelling headphones when I go outside, but I don't want it to have the opposite affect and cause me to zone out or be distracted. I would appreciate any tips or encouragement. Thank you.

I have a driving license but I am a very anxious driver and soon I may have to drive alone (which I have never done before). Has anyone got any advice on how to stay focused? Does anyone use white noise in earbuds / speaker or even noise cancelling headphones to help be less overhwlemed when driving? I am thinking of trying white noise as usually I need background noise or music to do absolutely anything and i usually use noise cancelling headphones when I go outside, but I don't want it to have the opposite affect and cause me to zone out or be distracted. I would appreciate any tips or encouragement. Thank you.

Was anxious and the universe didn't explode (yet) so now I'm going to sleep. I don't know if i will be ok but i am ok right now. If i wake up can you tell me you're glad of it?

What's wrong?

• got debilitating executive dysfunction cant do basic things or things i care about or anything really 

• dont have any secure safe close friendship dont feel important to anyone and scared because of past experiences. feel different and hard or impossible to be friends with because of the way i am. introverted low energy not good at talking and conversation 

• incompetent and useless. not independent and more useless and behind everyone else my age. 

• extremely low self image and lots of self hatred and always hurt myself verbally and physically bc the self hatred and self directed anger is too much pressure it needs a way out 

• suicidal ideations from trying to achieve more and do things but failing repeatedly and feeling trapped in my own head trapped by my own uselessness and laziness that also makes me feel like a burden on others and i feel like there is no way out 

• feel isolated and impossible to understand. feel unseen because of the kinds of issues that not everyone understands. no one i trust or feel safe to talk to and no one who will understand and talking feels useless and has usually just made me feel worse 

• trying to get professional help with an adhd assessment but there is a minimum 2 year waiting list which will maybe be more, but no one will be honest and transparent about waiting lists so it feels like a gamble and really confusing and overwhelming and impossible to make a decision 

I have an appointment tomorrow to try to get an adhd assessment and I'm worried i won't be taken seriously or that they won't wanna refer me (only inattentive symptoms and I don't think i fit the stereotype). I have done the asrs and got 4/6. I've been reading on adhd and considering it for years but I can't be sure and always question myself so i am also worried about downplaying things, but i really want a specialist assessment. I've written notes but its a mess in like 4 different places and now the appointment is tomorrow.

I am also a bit overwhelmed with the different pathways. If I don't want to wait years, am i supposed to say i want to use right to choose or will the gp tell me about that? Will they give me a list to choose from or do i have to choose from all of them? I'm kinda scared to say it i feel like i will end up not saying much. Can the waiting times for RTC still be years? What are the chances they will say no to referring me or discourage me from getting the assessment?

I have an appointment tomorrow to try to get an adhd assessment and I'm worried i won't be taken seriously or that they won't wanna refer me (only inattentive symptoms and I don't think i fit the stereotype). I have done the asrs and got 4/6. I've been reading on adhd and considering it for years but I can't be sure and always question myself so i am also worried about downplaying things, but i really want a specialist assessment. I've done research and written notes but its a mess in like 4 different places and now the appointment is tomorrow.

I am also a bit overwhelmed with the different pathways. If I don't want to wait years, am i supposed to say i want to use right to choose or will the gp tell me about that? Will they give me a list to choose from or do i have to choose from all of them? I'm kinda scared to say it i feel like i will end up not saying much. Can the waiting times for RTC still be years? What are the chances they will say no to referring me or discourage me from getting the assessment?

I feel like I'm so lazy and useless. Executive dyfunction really makes me hate myself. I feel kinda unworthy of life. Because its all my own lack of action and organisation that causes all my problems. I feel like its me. This is who i am. I wish i had a diagnosis but i cannot even make myself act and get help. Do you consider yourself disabled? Do you blame yourself?

Hello. Please can someone give me some words of comfort?

• My executive dysfunction and extreme laziness is genuinely debilitating and is an unsolvable problem that makes me feel like life isn't for me, because i don’t think i’ll ever be functional. i waste all day doing daydreaming and nothing and have wasted a lot of my life and i am still doing it and I can't stop procrastinating. I disappoint myself over and over and over i am in a loop.

\- i feel useless and incompetent. i feel like i don’t belong in this world. 

• i wish i could get an adhd assessment but i can’t make myself get it and its very hard to get and i don’t think i could handle the disappointment if i dont have it and i probably don't i am most likely just incredibly impressively lazy

• I am a really bad ungenuine friend and for some reason i don't really understand, i cannot connect with people or like them much. My best friend could replace me with a robot that responds faster and she has better friends and can really connect with people, but I don’t. All socialising, even if i don’t hate it, just feels like a tiring performance. 

• i am an extreme introvert, but I am very lonely. No one sees me or knows who i am. i daydream constantly about a perfect connection that doesn’t exist, but i don't even attach to people in real life. i really need a hug but i know i don’t deserve it

• i feel a bit dull and sick of life and i hate waking up. 

• i hate myself more than words can explain. I know i deserve pain and punishment but i wish someone would be kind to me because i can’t bring myself to be kind to myself. so i guess i will bother some strangers. I know i am a failure and unacceptable but i need someone to lie and justify my existence

Hello. Please can someone give me some words of comfort?

• My executive dysfunction and extreme laziness is genuinely debilitating and is an unsolvable problem that makes me feel like life isn't for me, because i don’t think i’ll ever be functional. i waste all day doing daydreaming and nothing and have wasted a lot of my life and i am still doing it and I can't stop procrastinating. I disappoint myself over and over and over i am in a loop.

- i feel useless and incompetent. i feel like i don’t belong in this world. 

• i wish i could get an adhd assessment but i can’t make myself get it and its very hard to get and i don’t think i could handle the disappointment if i dont have it and i probably don't i am most likely just incredibly impressively lazy

• I am a really bad ungenuine friend and for some reason i don't really understand, i cannot connect with people or like them much. My best friend could replace me with a robot that responds faster and she has better friends and can really connect with people, but I don’t. All socialising, even if i don’t hate it, just feels like a tiring performance. 

• i am an extreme introvert, but I am very lonely. No one sees me or knows who i am. i daydream constantly about a perfect connection that doesn’t exist, but i don't even attach to people in real life. i really need a hug but i know i don’t deserve it

• i feel a bit dull and sick of life and i hate waking up. 

• i hate myself more than words can explain. I know i deserve pain and punishment but i wish someone would be kind to me because i can’t bring myself to be kind to myself. so i guess i will bother some strangers. I know i am a failure and unacceptable but i need someone to lie and justify my existence

Hello. Please can someone give me some words of comfort?

• My executive dysfunction and extreme laziness is genuinely debilitating and is an unsolvable problem that makes me feel like life isn't for me, because i don’t think i’ll ever be functional. i waste all day doing daydreaming and nothing and have wasted a lot of my life and i am still doing it and I can't stop procrastinating. I disappoint myself over and over and over i am in a loop.

\- i feel useless and incompetent. i feel like i don’t belong in this world. 

• i wish i could get an adhd assessment but i can’t make myself get it and its very hard to get and i don’t think i could handle the disappointment if i dont have it and i probably don't i am most likely just incredibly impressively lazy

• I am a really bad ungenuine friend and for some reason i don't really understand, i cannot connect with people or like them much. My best friend could replace me with a robot that responds faster and she has better friends and can really connect with people, but I don’t. All socialising, even if i don’t hate it, just feels like a tiring performance. 

• i am an extreme introvert, but I am very lonely. No one sees me or knows who i am. i daydream constantly about a perfect connection that doesn’t exist, but i don't even attach to people in real life. i really need a hug but i know i don’t deserve it

• i feel a bit dull and sick of life and i hate waking up. 

• i hate myself more than words can explain. I know i deserve pain and punishment but i wish someone would be kind to me because i can’t bring myself to be kind to myself. so i guess i will bother some strangers. I know i am a failure and unacceptable but i need someone to lie and justify my existence

Hello i am feeling like i want a distraction right now. Could anyone tell me something interesting, or even just tell me anything? Something funny or sad or happy or absolutely anything? Thank you.

I think shame is a trigger for me. And anger and procrastination.

Yesterday i made mistakes.

Because i am stupid and incompetent. I'm especially stupid in the kitchen. And i am not adhd enough to blame it on anything but my own uselessness.

I didn't hurt myself.

It would have gone away instantly if i did. I could have drawn a line and been done with it like last time. But i sat in patheticness.

​

And now I might have made another mistake.

I asked my best friend for reasurrance. I do not usually ask for anything ever. I am emotionally unavailable. Now she is not replying. She has hurt me before and not communicated well. Now i know that i never know when something is wrong so i feel like something is wrong often. She wanted to get rid of me so she wouldn't be disappointed anymore so now i feel like i am replaceable and discardable. For some reason i thought itd be a good idea to tell her i wish she'd give me more reassurance. I don't think she was feeling in a reassuring mood.

​

And i want someone to talk to but 3am is too late to call samaritans bc ppl might wake up. Does anyone want to prove to me that she is not the only person in the world who will talk to me? Now I'm on do not disturb. Why did i do this? We had a good day today. Why did i ruin it? You opened a can of worms. You wanted love to crawl out but you know deep down, they are worms.

Hello. I have been considering getting an adhd assessment and reading books on it and thinking about it for years, but i have a lot of doubts and confusion because I definitely don't fit the stereotype and I don't know if i even have enough traits to have the disorder, so I'm worried im just being silly or possibly have 'sub-threshold/sub-clinical adhd' or just have some kind of pathological laziness/incompetence. The executive dysfunction / stuff i do have is just extremely pervasive and impairing for me and I'm struggling with it. I feel like i have some autistic traits too but not enough so i don't think i will try to get an assessment for ASD, but possibly the two can mask eachother.

Please can anyone with inattentive adhd share their experiences - which symptoms do you meet and don't meet and how they present for you and how they presented in childhood? And also how was it discussed in your assessment? How do autistic traits affect ADHD traits? How many criteria do you meet and were there any that you thought you didn't meet but discussed in the assessment and actually ended up meeting or vice versa?

Im sorry if this is an invasive / annoying / vague question. I have looked into the criteria and read and done research so much that now when i read the criteria or those rating scales my brain is just overloaded and i keep overthinking it and getting confused - i might be taking the criteria too literally or have read it so much that its lost all meaning 🥲. That's why i think it might help to hear peoples experiences instead of clinical language.

Thank you

Hello. I have been considering getting an adhd assessment and reading books on it and thinking about it for years, but i have a lot of doubts and confusion because I definitely don't fit the stereotype and I don't know if i even have enough traits to have the disorder, so I'm worried im just being silly or possibly have 'sub-threshold/sub-clinical adhd' or just have some kind of pathological laziness/incompetence. The executive dysfunction / stuff i do have is just extremely pervasive and impairing for me and I'm struggling with it.

Please can anyone with inattentive adhd share their experiences - which symptoms do you meet and don't meet and how they present for you and how they presented in childhood? And also how was it discussed in your assessment? How many criteria do you meet and were there any that you thought you didn't meet but discussed in the assessment and actually ended up meeting or vice versa?

Im sorry if this is an invasive / annoying / vague question. I have looked into the criteria and read and done research so much that now when i read the criteria or those rating scales my brain is just overloaded and i keep overthinking it and getting confused - i might be taking the criteria too literally or have read it so much that its lost all meaning 🥲. That's why i think it might help to hear peoples experiences instead of clinical language.

Thank you

Hello. I have been considering getting an adhd assessment and reading books on it and thinking about it for years, but i have a lot of doubts and confusion because I definitely don't fit the stereotype and I don't know if i even have enough traits to have the disorder, so I'm worried im just being silly or possibly have 'sub-threshold/sub-clinical adhd' or just have some kind of pathological laziness/incompetence. The executive dysfunction / stuff i do have is just extremely pervasive and impairing for me and I'm struggling with it.

Please can anyone with inattentive adhd share their experiences - which symptoms do you meet and don't meet and how they present for you and how they presented in childhood? And also how was it discussed in your assessment? How many criteria do you meet and were there any that you thought you didn't meet but discussed in the assessment and actually ended up meeting or vice versa?

Im sorry if this is an invasive / annoying / vague question. I have looked into the criteria and read and done research so much that now when i read the criteria or those rating scales my brain is just overloaded and i keep overthinking it and getting confused - i might be taking the criteria too literally or have read it so much that its lost all meaning 🥲. That's why i think it might help to hear peoples experiences instead of clinical language.

Thank you

Hello. I have been considering getting an adhd assessment and reading books on it and thinking about it for years, but i have a lot of doubts and confusion because I definitely don't fit the stereotype and I don't know if i even have enough traits to have the disorder, so I'm worried im just being silly or possibly have 'sub-threshold/sub-clinical adhd' or just have some kind of pathological laziness/incompetence. The executive dysfunction / stuff i do have is just extremely pervasive and impairing for me and I'm struggling with it.

Please can anyone with inattentive adhd share their experiences - which symptoms do you meet and don't meet and how they present for you and how they presented in childhood? And also how was it discussed in your assessment? How many criteria do you meet and were there any that you thought you didn't meet but discussed in the assessment and actually ended up meeting or vice versa?

Im sorry if this is an invasive / annoying / vague question. I have looked into the criteria and read and done research so much that now when i read the criteria or those rating scales my brain is just overloaded and i keep overthinking it and getting confused - i might be taking the criteria too literally or have read it so much that its lost all meaning 🥲. That's why i think it might help to hear peoples experiences instead of clinical language.

Thank you

Does anyone know how to get rid of anger? I might hurt myself seriously one day. It's getting worse. Every time i try to do any work i get extremely frustrated really quickly when there's any problem. I only know one thing that works to kill the anger.

TW: SI, SH

I have been a complete failure for longer than my whole adult life and every day I'm alive procrastinating i hate myself more and more. I am so sick of promising myself to do better over and over and over and failing again and again and again. No matter what i try its still just a fraction of what i need to get done to be a functional person. I wanted to do so many things for so long but after years and years of laziness now i feel so hopeless and incompetent. >!Now when i end up in that same place of procrastinating until the last minute i have started hurting myself, and i get so angry. I think i am a worthless parasite. I am truly not made for this world. It's just comforting and not real but i have started to have suicidal ideation.!<

I am the worst kind of person. I do not have problems like other people have and deal with and still function and do things. I am too lazy and useless to cope with life. I wish i had adhd or something but i probably dont meet the criteria and i know deep down that i am just broken and incredibly incredibly bad at life. Thats why i can't even think about trying to make myself try to get assessed (which would probably not be very accessible) because if i don't have it i will feel so worthless and it will confirm every awful thing i say to myself. Its the one maybe hope i have that this isn't my fault and that there is something that can fix me.

Sorry for posting this. It is probably not allowed but I don't care anymore. I wish someone could know and understand how awful and useless and bad i am and still be nice to me. I will probably regret posting this people will be unkind or tell me i need to get help instead of complaining but unfortunately i am too lazy to make appointments and do anything i just have nobody real to talk to. Sorry if this irritates anyone. Tell me there's another way out?

To anyone that struggles with executive dyfunction / adhd-like symptoms, do you have any tips on how i could make myself get work done?

I feel like I can't start and i cant focus. Usually i use music, and white noise, and very specific step by step to-do list planning breaking it into tiny steps, and timers, and recording myself and caffeine, but i need something new and different maybe?

Maybe anything weird and strange and not the normal standard stuff i have heard a lot. What works for you? Even super specific strategies or weird stuff that you might think only works for you just to give me ideas. Thank you

To anyone that struggles with executive dyfunction / adhd-like symptoms, do you have any tips on how i could make myself get work done?

I feel like I can't start and i cant focus. Usually i use music, and white noise, and very specific step by step to-do list planning breaking it into tiny steps, and timers, and recording myself and caffeine, but i need something new and different maybe?

Maybe anything weird and strange and not the normal standard stuff i have heard a lot. What works for you? Even super specific strategies or weird stuff that you might think only works for you just to give me ideas. Thank you