r/MentalHealthUK

Hi all.

Been living in my semi detached home since 2023. When I moved in, I (now 33f) put a note through Marks (40-something?) door to introduce myself as his new neighbour that included my phone number asking that if any noise from my side was disruptive to just let me know. Obviously I don’t want to disturb him, and made clear I’m more than willing to adjust any volume if it’s a problem. New house, new neighbours and the walls are VERY thin - I think it’s a neighbourly thing to do. I do have two cats that get the zoomies occasionally and I like music. He replied introducing himself, said the cats are not a problem and thanked me for being considerate, and that he’d let me know if anything was too disruptive. He also lives alone with no children in the house.

He keeps very much to himself and has no visitors other than 1 person who brings two kids over very occasionally. He rarely leaves the house - he’s a mature student doing an online course. He keeps his property very well maintained. Whenever he mows his grass he mows mine too (never asked, he just does it - I thank him every time), we take each other’s parcels etc. it’s a considerate relationship and by all accounts, he’s a very good neighbour. He’s even helped me during a gallbladder attack that required an ambulance - he actually stayed until the ambulance came (2am, I had nobody available to help and I couldn’t move, needed surgery).

The only thing I’ve noticed is he does occasionally have ‘violent’ outbursts in his own home: banging, growling, swearing, kicking the cupboards/ walls, and slamming the doors. These outburst are VERY intermittent and at most last 10-20 minutes. I’ve put it down to stress from studying tbh, they happen so infrequently, well - who am I to judge? we all have bad days. I’ve never commented on it and he’s never asked me to keep any noise down either.

Last Friday, I text him apologising for any noise (my partner and I have been having spats recently and so raised voices have definitely come from my side. I asked partner to leave on Friday and he did). Mark replied that’s it’s OK, thanked me for my apology, said he wasn’t sure if ‘it was his anxiety or something else, but he’s having a lot of trouble sleeping.’ He ended by saying ‘I hope it works out soon 😊’. Partner has left so there’s nobody to talk to = less noise by itself. I’ve had no visitors in that time either.

However, Monday night, all hell broke loose. I was in bed but woke up because of it - at 1am he had another outburst, but this time was different. He was screaming ‘I can see you! I can hear you! Fuck! Fuck, fuck, FUCK!! I KNOW YOU’RE THERE!’ it went on ALL NIGHT. I was petrified - he was throwing things/ himself so hard at the walls I honestly thought he might come through it. I didn’t sleep a wink. He seemed to be mirroring my movements when I went down the stairs to make sure the door was locked - banging and slamming the whole way, repeating ‘I can see you!’

I went to work the next day and when I came home, all was quiet…until it wasn’t. About 6:30pm, it started again: doors slamming so hard it shook mine, banging, running and stomping repeatedly up and down the stairs. He took off in his car and almost skidded. Came back an hour later, banging/stomping/ swearing/ growling continued but not the ‘I can see you/ I can hear you’ comments - took back off in the car again. Came back 40mins later and continued the pattern. Died down at about 2am as he left the house and didn’t come back. He wasn’t there when I left for work in the morning and wasn’t there when I returned; however, his grass was mowed. As in - a DIRECT line right down the middle. That’s where I’m concerned it’s hostility to me. He’s never done that before, ever.

I don’t know what to do. I’m tiptoeing around my house. I daren’t breathe too loud. I have no idea if he’s having a mental health crisis, or if it’s me that’s set him off - or both. Because his outbursts are violent, I don’t feel safe to talk to him or approach his door to offer help. Because he’s never been anything other than pleasant to me, I genuinely didn’t think it was aimed at me. With him going out of his way not to cover my side of the lawn, now I’m worried it is. Overall, I’m very concerned about his welfare, but now I’m also concerned about my own. As I’m typing this he’s furiously hoovering the house and stomping around - he’s hoovered 4 times today. I don’t want to be overbearing or humiliate him by sending the police to do a welfare check; I’m also very aware he would KNOW it’s me because nobody else would be able to hear. It’s not happening in the garden. If he does have hostility towards me…well I still have to live here.

Does ANYBODY have any experience with this, or advice on what to do? I’m worried about him, myself and the implications of intervening. Please help.

Sucks when you have no choice I’d literally be homeless if I didn’t work full time to only afford one room in a house share not even my own bathroom. I’m going insane and can’t get help again because I work the same hours as all healthcare can barely make my chronic illness appointments. My boyfriend said he thinks if I “act crazy” at work like I do at home I’ll get fired and that’s a real fear for me. I work in a posh tiny little village. Everyone knows everyone. I feel like I’m going to break and end up back in hospital again. I also think I’ve got bipolar but I know the GP can’t diagnose that and like prescribe me lithium to try. I’m just stuck. I’m evil angry horrible person

I’ve been struggling with my mental health for over a year now, I know it’s a problem and while before I was able to function I am now finding it very hard. Getting out of bed takes all of my energy, I go through phases of just ignoring everyone and feel like rotting away at home.

My life is otherwise great. If anyone looked at it they’d probably wish they had it. Im living the dream life and don’t feel it at all. I’m achieving all of these goals and feel nothing.

I went to the GP today to ask for help and felt so judged and embarrassed to even ask for help. She was asking me what I think it is and basically concluded that life is hard sometimes and I just have to deal with it. She told me to find an exercise routine (after I told her I’ve been in the gym and training for a marathon), socialise more and just get on with it. I was struggling not to cry by the end.

I’ve had these types of cycles all my life. Some great years and some awful years. With no actual cause. It’s just very disheartening to finally ask for some guidance and help and be told it’s not that serious. She said if she did what I’m doing she wouldn’t have a job and I should be grateful I’m still employed. We work very different domains but yes it’s still taking it’s toll. I’m just very disappointed.

thinking back on when my gp referred me to an nhs like psychiatrist or whatever she was (can't remember if she was a psychiatrist or psychologist idfk)... she like interviewed me abt my mental health and shit. and at the end she was like "i don't think you are depressed, or that there is anything mentally wrong with you. i just think you have autism. so, there isn't anything i can do, i'm not going to put you forward for further help." ... all she did was refer me to links counselling (which i'm still waiting on like 7 months later btw).

so i HATE when ppl tell me "you need help" "you need to speak to a psychologist/psychiatrist" "you need to speak to ur gp" okay and what're they gonna do cuz clearly they've done nothing in the past. i'm on the waiting list for nhs talking therapies (been on it for like a year, or more lowkey. i think a year and a half). and the only other thing any gp suggests is medication... liiiikeeeeeee... are we being seriously serious rn?

My GP agrees that a psychiatric assessment would be highly useful for me, given that, after being prescribed antidepressants, I had a manic episode, and this is highly concerning/indicative of a mood disorder. I asked for an assessment last year and received a dismissive response from the CMHT. A few weeks ago, I requested an assessment again, but this time, two things were different:

1. I have become more aware of my biological father's severe struggles with mental illness that have lead him to act violently, impulsively, and erratically. There is a huge genetic component to mental illness and I wanted to make my family history clear.

2. I have undergone CBT, art therapy, and group therapy this year. I weaned myself off the anti-depressants that caused so many problems for me. I have improved my life immensely and have returned to complete my studies. I have been self harm free for a year but experience near-daily urges to return to it, among severe mood swings that concern me greatly.

Both of these facts were included in my referral, along with my continued struggles with suicidality, self harm, impulsive behaviour, and more.

The CMHT responded as follows (which is identical to the letter I received last year): "Following discussion of your referral in our multi-disciplinary team meeting, we would recommend engaging with Emotional Skills Training in the first instance to support you in managing and understanding your emotions." The letter goes on but essentially recommends that I attend some local free workshops.

I feel completely dismissed and patronised by this response, especially as it is now the SECOND TIME I have received it. My plan now is to pursue a private assessment, but I am still disgusted with the way that the CMHT has belittled my struggles and suggested something as trivial as "emotional skills training", when I have worked so hard to improve my mental health, yet may still be suffering from a serious mood disorder.

I feel like my main issue is that their response has not changed since last year. They have not acknowledged either my progress or my continued mental health battle. They say they discussed my referral in the meeting, but I'm doubtful they actually did.

Does anyone have any suggestions or encouraging words regarding my next steps? I am determined to be assessed - if I am indeed living with bipolar disorder (likely type II), I want to know about it so I can pursue appropriate treatment and understand myself better.

We have a community mental health team building here, I have walked past it but I don't know if you can just walk in?

If you’ve previously been on an acute mental health ward, either informal or under section, what sort of activities did you like? Or would you have liked? And what sort of activities would you not want to do? How long do you think you could focus for and at what times of the day? Would you prefer group or 1-1?

I’ve been offered an activities job, and I have lots of ideas, but I really want to hear from people with lived experience, as it’s the most valuable imo.

Thank you!

I've been homebound for the past two years and deteriorating due to agoraphobia and ocd. I do not have the capacity to go out at all.

The help from my gp is limited to advice on anxiety, discussing symptoms and providing medication. They also have tried to refer me to a community mental health team that didn't help and limited me to initial assesments three times.

I recently had a crisis where I felt like I couldn't go on and when i called single point of access, they just told me they had a referral and that the community mental health team would reach out next day. They didn't.

I feel like i'm not getting adequate care or escalation relative to what i'm going through. My agoraphobia has made my house my only safe space and i can not even function outside. If i can't do that, I don't feel like it's worth holding on.

Am i saying the wrong things on call because i geniunely don't know how other people get escalation or get taken seriously. I feel so pathetic hoping for help that never comes but also too broken to do anything about it myself. Believe me i tried because i didn't get any help but i just collapsed into myself because of failure. I just want enough help to stabilise and reclaim my life

Long story short, I've been suffering with pretty severe anxiety/agoraphobia for maybe 4 years, which massively worsened about 1.5 years ago. I can go maybe 2 or 3 streets away from my house on a good day. Every time I make any real progress through gradual exposure, I either have to wait in for a parcel or something, so I miss a day and then backslide, or I just wake up one day randomly back to square one without any warning.

I'm taking 150mg venlafaxine and 40mg propranolol daily, with occasionally an extra propranolol or two when needed though I've never really found taking it as and when does much for me. I've also just finished about 12 sessions of CBT over the phone and am now having to wait 3 months before I can reapply.

My doctors could not be less help. Honestly they cannot get me off the phone quick enough. They constantly withhold my medication without telling me why, only prescribe 7 or 14 days worth instead of 28 so I'm spending twice as much on prescriptions than I should be and I'm constantly extra anxious because of being scared I'll be left to go cold turkey because they keep fucking up. They also refuse to do home visits for me, for the mental health stuff or for other health issues. I'm like 90% sure I have an unrelated ear infection I've just been living with because they won't accept anyone who isn't elderly can be housebound.

What are your doctors doing to help you with anxiety/depression/agoraphobia symptoms? I keep asking mine what other options I have in terms of medications and they pretty much tell me there is nothing else for anxiety than propranolol but I'm sure that can't be the case. I've already moved doctors once because my last ones were useless too but at least they were just incompetent, these ones seem to just dislike me personally.

Hey guys, so for context I’ve struggled with my mental health since I was 14 or 15 (23 now) and had private therapists as a teenager, but it was just CBT work.

Fast forward to age 19 I had a mental breakdown, and was admitted into a mental health ward due to psychosis. I was then assessed but more information was required, and I stopped engaging at the time. There was a mention of bipolar and CPTSD and I just hit the deck and didn’t want to accept it because I have a rough family history and digging into it was too daunting.

Now, I’m more stable than I was but I’ve been out of work for 2 years because of my mental health. I’ve been getting some basic help from GPs who passed me onto talking therapies which, with all due respect, really doesn’t help. I have tried to get referred to the community treatment team but it was declined, so I’ve been researching private assessments.

I’ve come across clinical partners uk, and they offer an assessment for £425.

Anyone got any experience with this place, or just private diagnosis routes?

TLDR ~ wait times too long for nhs diagnosis routes, would you recommend just spending the money to go private?

Long story short I’m sat on a fucking bench crying my eyes out cos I just feel so fucking shit and I don’t wanna do it anymore but I’m too much of a fucking coward to do anything. The thought of getting better terrifies me because it’s been my life for 6 years, I was a child now I’m approaching my mid 20s. I hate myself so fucking much

Hi all, does anyone see their therapist more than once a week? (If so what type of therapy do they offer? Eg Analyst / psychodynamic?)

Just started seeing a new therapist after just trying a few sessions with someone who wasn’t quite the right fit but I’m finding 50mins a week doesn’t feel enough. Struggling with my mental health most of the week so by the time I get to see them again it feels like it’s been a month not a week!

so i went to my gp to try and get a referral to some more specialist mental health services than counseling and self help because its never really worked for me. my childhood was quite abusive over a long period of time, and i have a really hard time just like... functioning? keeping friends, having secure relationships, holding a sleep schedule, going outside etc.

i get horrifically emotional very fast, and i dissociate and feel paranoid when that emotion spikes past a certain point. sometimes it gets so bad that i think im not an actual human like everyone else is. long story short, i want an evaluation for a complex mental health issue because it feels more complicated than anxiety/depression. unless thats a thing with anxiety and depression that i dont know about???

anyway, i went to the GP and they basically talked over me the whole time, diagnosed me with GAD and said i was depressed and then offered antidepressants. i dont really think im depressed, but i am a very anxious person so the GAD makes sense. but tbh the anxiety (even though its annoying and definitely has always been an issue with my life) is nowhere near the worst of my problems right now.

so now i dont really know what to do. i said no to the antidepressants, and then they booked me in again for another appointment (i think because i discussed feeling su*cidal pretty often). so i can probably ask for them again when i go back. is it worth trying anyway? im kind of scared of them so i dont know. where do i even go from here??

TL;DR: gp diagnosed me with anxiety/depression and offered me antidepressants when i went in to get a referral to specialist mental health services, but i dont think im depressed and now idk what to do or where to go.

The person isn't unsafe but does self harm (cuts) and suffers with passive suicide ideation and can never be honest in therapy sessions due to them not wanting the information they share to get back to their family, they just want help and/or understanding, to be able to be honest but the systems letting them down and making them wait. Any thoughts?

It feels like theirs no point to anything. My heart hurts. Im in so much pain. No one knows. I just want this to end and I don't know what to do, Because there's nothing that can be done.

Tw: suicide, overdose

I took an intentional overdose on Friday. An ambulance took me to a&e and the mental health assessment I had was pretty awful. I didn't feel listened to, they read through my history, decided my social issues are 100% of the cause of my overdose, said they can't help me, and sent me home. I had to really push to be referred to the home treatment team. The action plan is on the NHS app and I've read it and I'm so angry. They've said that 'she denies suicidal intent at the time of the overdose'. That's not true, I told them why I did it and that I felt disappointed that it didn't work. They also said that upon discharge I would be returning home with my mother. I live alone, I don't even live in the same town as my mother. I told them over and over that I would be going home alone.

Is this something I can make a complaint about? I'm sure others have experienced this so how did you deal with it?

Edit- finally spoke with a pharmacist from HTT and I'm not meant to be taking my antidepressants due to the overdose which I didn't know. No one at the hospital discussed it with me and HTT have been telling me to still take them. Think a complaint is definitely needed 😅

I swapped therapists from F2F to video call about 2 months ago, had about the same amount of sessions with both (7 each I think? Ive lost count)

Weve finally started on an "action plan" of sorts but I'm still so skeptical and I'm becoming increasingly stressed\agitated during and after my appointments, leading up to extreme fatigue afterwards. I'm honestly really worried it's once again going to be a complete waste of our time. I'm not finding things are helping me cope, like today honestly, I just want to crawl back into bed. I don't find staying in the present and focusing on something or mediation and breathing excercises is helpful (latter actually agitates me significantly). It's really hard to want to continue with it all when I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel but I know I need to to overcome my phobia.

Does anyone know of group or people joining together to change this awfulness? Just had another not nice interaction with staff who huffed at me for not knowing why They called me? I know they are overworked but I've just got out of hospital. This whole thing is a mess. Very vulnerable people access these services as it is their only hope. I know this is the reality of the situation but it shouldn't be.

So I'm being discharged from the psychosis team(they only keep patients 3 years) and crisis team(for a recent crisis thay nearly had me hospitalised) and im going under the community treatment team on Thursday.

Im hearing so many mixed things about this kind of team and im so confused. What can I expect from the ctt? Im apparently in psychosis at the minute but im pretty chill too. I need to change antipsychotic as im on the max dose, so im hoping they'll sort that with me.

How often am I likely to see someone? I do best when I have semi regular visits/appointments as I dont have insight to when episodes are starting. Thank you for reading.