u/Ambitious-Client-220

I was taken by the state for neglect and abuse. My mother was starving me. I hear adoptees talk about relinquishment. I don't know if her not showing up to the court hearing counts as relinquishment. I honestly don't know what to think of the entire situation. Is what she did worse than just abandoning me?

I was born in '73 and she was born in '48, so she is likely dead. Yet, I decided to start looking for her. Half of me hates her and the other half just wants to know what she looks like. Am I making a mistake given the circumstances?

I know many of us did not have a happy childhood, me included. But I have heard some transracial adoptees say they had a happy childhood. If you are one of these, what do you think your parents did to make it successful? I know potential adopters read this reddit and regardless of many of our views, transracial adoption will continue. So those who are going to adopt might be interested.

I want to use mesquite to grill steaks/burgers. Do l need to light a bed of charcoal then add the mesquite?

I had to attend a retirement party yesterday for a friend . I am socially awkward. It was worse because I was the only nonwhite person. I was raised by a white family but now I’m not comfortable in a crowed of white. yet if they would have been Mexican, I would have felt like an imposter.

I was born in Mexico and adopted in the US. I have done the Ancestry DNA test. Those who were successful, what helped you the most? -Thank you

I am taking my wife there for her birthday. We have never been there. For those that have, can you suggest an entree?

I hated being a transracial adoptee. I think every effort should be made to place children with their own race/ethnicity. being an adopee can be difficult by itself much less being forced to live between two cultures.

Although I was put into a very abusive adoptive home where I stuck out like a sore thumb due to my race, the thing that bothers me the most is being abandoned by the one person who above all others was supposed to protect and love me.

When I was young, I think I was a white person in a brown body. As I explored the world and my heritage, I changed. When I was young in a small town most of my friends were white. Today most of my friends are Hispanic. Today, I see things from both perspectives and that is one of the reasons that I don't fit in with either race. Do you see yourself as white on the inside or your biological race on the inside or a combination?

It seems crazy how many of us were treated bad or even raised in racist households. I know some of your parents spent thousands to bring you here and you still were not treated right. I know my parents would have preferred a white boy. They told me. They got me because I was what was available in foster care-A little brown Mexican born toddler. They believed in white supremacy, yet they still took me. I felt like a pound puppy. Why do you think your parents chose to adopt outside of their race?

I was ashamed to be a transracial adoptee when I was young. I am slowly becoming more comfortable with it but I will not say proud.

I feel that white adoptees can blend in with their family and feel comfortable. They have the option of letting people know. We are outed by our race. I did not talk about it when I was in school and I still don't outside of reddit. It is a very personal part of my life that is filled with pain.

When your brown and your parents are white in a small Texas town, everyone knows. They point when they see you with your family and you know people talk. When you finally leave that town, you learn that you don't fit in with any culture. You are forever an outsider. I feel like the only people who really understand this are other transracial adoptees.