u/Away_Emergency_7832

These nights are getting harder and harder . Everybody said it would get better with time . I don't think it's going to get better . Why did they tell me that he will get better it'll get easier . It's not it's hurting more and more . I need to go to the hospital because it's hurting so bad . I will not go I miss my angel I love her more than anything more than myself . We're just load of Puppets down here that's all this is if we want to go to heaven we have to be a puppet and listen and whatever he tells us for us to do apparently that's what that stupid Bible says well. I'm done I'm going to find my angel there's nothing stopping me for finding her we believe in each other we believe we are finding each other we can't be separated . Yes this post is messed up because I'm sleep deprived I won't go nowhere for help I don't want it I went on here because it's keeping me awake .

This grief won i am done..I love my ladybug I don't want to suffer anymore here. I will not go another 11 months that's a promise

I'm trying to find the name of them I remember I bought them when I was younger we would get him at the Dollar General or the mall would have them in Pennsylvania the five and dime stores they were a 4x4 battery operated dune buggy they had you would build them it would also have where you can switch it into wheel drive or four-wheel drive and they have little rollers on each Corner guides like they went on a track they were model kits I don't know if anybody can remember them if they remember what they're called I kind of remember but I can't find them I found something similar but I don't know if they're damn they were like less than $5 or something maybe but they had not be tires and you can switch them and build them

I've been reallysick I miss My angel really bad, i love her so much I don't want to Go to the doctor i heard there's a thing really called broken heart. I don't know if it's real. I'm really struggling with the death of angel. I try to going. I try my best but I can't it's not making any sense. I can't accept it and I won't.I don't want to.That's the thing. I know my wife died i'm okay on the outside, but on the inside, I don't want to get better. I'm 50 years old, it's my life.I should be able to decide what I wanna do nobody has the right To tell me to keep going they do not, so stop telling me that, please.I've tired is hearing it. nobody understands what my wife and I have for each other and I made a promise that day when she was dying of a heart attack and I tend to that. My body's been going downhill ever since she died

How do we deal with\n These women, they know, you lost your spouse and they trying a nose in and trying to get in your pants or trying to get something out of you like money or something. Especially these young girls like 20s, early 30s, I'm 50 years old. I do not have to offer them There shouldn't be anything like that allowed on these groups like these widow, groups or grief shares or anything.I'm just don't feel like dealing with it.It's not nice.I just lost my wife , do they think they're honestly just gonna walk into my life and expect me to give them something.Come on, I don't have her sleep with another woman.I'll never marry another woman.I'll never date another woman.My wife's my life if you think I'm gonna cheat on her.They got another thing coming

Vary depressed And angry today, I miss my wife so bad.This holiday sucked the Labor Day was bad.I didn't do nothing.I got my daughter a Pizza that was it.I can't keep doing this anymore.I'm tired of it.Have tired of being In fear , because my wife isn't here I have not okay.I'm not okay. I am trying to look like i'm okay , but i'm not I hate life so bad I don't want to do this. it hurts bad Why was we created and then have to be in this living hell without My queen why I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MY LADYBUG

It hurts more more each day. My wife isn't here.I don't know why she had to die.Why do I have to sit here and suffer without my wife. she is everything to me I am a crying mess I can't stop I love her so much we was happy this isn't fair I not sitting here without her anymore I will find her my heart will stop soon no meds since May 11th 3 days after my heart stopped for 3 minutes.

Each holiday each day is getting more difficult for me. I can't do thi I love my Angel I miss my wife so bad that's why I gave up my medicine. After I had a heart attack in May 3 days later I signed myself out of the hospital and aint been to no dr or anything again. I don't want to be separated from my wife for anymore.

It hurts more more each day. My wife isn't here.I don't know why she had to die.Why do I have to sit here and suffer without my wife. she is everything to me I am a crying mess I can't stop I love her so much we was happy this isn't fair I not sitting here without her anymore I will find her my heart will stop soon no meds since May 11th 3 days after my heart stopped for 3 minutes.

Nobody seems to have an idea .My doctor said I need to go get checked out.I can't really find Nothing on the web.I had a heart attack On may eighth I signed myself out of the hospital after a clean heart catheterization. On the 11th, I've been having pains and stuff since July. Third, but the numbers and stuff keeps getting changed around on my heart app. I just really tired lately, I asked the doctor. What's going on?I can't go to the doctor I don't have their insurance so I can't go get any EKG or anything does anybody know what's if it'll get better on my own. I don't want to go to the doctor like I said.I have no insurance.I'm also grieving death of my wife.She's been dead for ten months , and i'm not taking care of myself

Nobody seems to have an idea .My doctor said I need to go get checked out.I can't really find Nothing on the web.I had a heart attack On may eighth I signed myself out of the hospital after a clean heart catheterization. On the 11th, I've been having pains and stuff since July. Third, but the numbers and stuff keeps getting changed around on my heart app. I just really tired lately, I asked the doctor. What's going on?I can't go to the doctor I don't have their insurance so I can't go get any EKG or anything does anybody know what's if it'll get better on my own?My heart portal just get where it's bad and it'll stop.I don't want to go to the doctor like I said.I have them insurance.I'm also agreeing with the death of my wife.She's been dead for ten months , and i'm not taking care of myself

It has been over 9 months since my wife died, and I lost my appetite.I'm completely Done with this I hate life.I hate it and miss my wife so bad.Why do I have to be here