u/Charming-Bike-427

It’s been happening for a while now, we have been together 5 years and I’d say it started happening at last year.

He keeps threatening to break up with me during arguments and almost going through with it. Usually he does it over the phone but last time he came in person to do it so I really thought it was the last time. But we talked and after we were done I asked to stop at Dunkin because I use food to cope. He first picked up pizza for himself though and that’s when I realized he wasn’t breaking up with me because he can’t eat when he’s upset. We didn’t talk about the break up threat and just went back to my house. I don’t even want to talk about it anymore tbh.

It’s something that destroys me every time though. It’s one of the worst things that can happen in my life to me, he is the first person I have loved and there’s so much history and fun.

I try to tell him he needs to stop but he doesn’t. I’ve told him how it makes me feel. I know he thinks it’s real too and that’s why he does it but he needs to take a week and figure out if that’s what he truly wants, not do it in the middle of a heated moment. Because he’s never shown any negativity when we are good.

So how do I get him to understand he needs to stop? Is this just a lost cause on trying to get him to understand?

I took it an hour and a half late so that means it’s going to take me longer to fall asleep. I’m already having trouble sleeping so it’s sucks.

It’s just that not taking my medication on time is really going to make trying to sleep worse and it’s my brother’s graduation tomorrow. It’s already hard for me because I’m overcoming agoraphobia and it’s going to be a lot being in a crowd for who knows how long. We have to leave 2 hours before it even starts too. Then my grandma is going to be in the car and I love her but omg, she can talk to herself for an hour.

I really wish I didn’t need medication in times like this. How amazing would it be for the time I go to sleep to come along and I’m actually tired without a pill.

I’m looking at my bracelet that I’ve had for 9 years and the charms I got with it first are barely tarnished. The newer charms still look good too. I shower with it all the time.

But I’ve seen people complain that their bracelet is discolored within a few months with them taking care of it right. I don’t understand how because in my experience it lasts a long time.

Are they just lying about how they treat their bracelet or what?

I don’t know what this is. I feel stable. I’m sleeping 7-9 hours a night and I’m still getting tired, I’m not doing anything outside the normal (I’m in the house watching shows and crocheting most of the day), I’m still acting how I usually do, and no one has said anything to me. Ive been on meds consistently since I’ve been diagnosed two years ago too.

Except for the longest time this thing has persisted where I feel like my thoughts aren’t my own almost. If I have a certain memory or thought pop into my head sometimes the next thought that is triggered is that someone is thinking that same thought or remembering something related. Idk when it started.

I think it came from a while ago when I started thinking about my Girl Scout leader as a kid and how mean she was to me. I never really thought of her before after I grew up. Few days later I found out from facebook that she died. I start thinking that she was thinking of me and the thought went away at some point but then it came back one day.

Is something like this a sign of schizophrenia? When I was in inpatient they kept asking if they think I had it before they diagnosed me with bipolar. I don’t think I am but idk.

I’m on IOS. **I’m on mobile I just couldn’t continue without adding the web part.

I messaged the mods and they don’t know what it is either.

Before one hour the replies to comments won’t load, it just says continue thread. And when I click continue thread it leads me back to the post and I can’t see the replies.