This is my second post, sorry for it being so long, I am mentally very unwell
I honestly don’t know how much longer I can keep living like this. I’m a 27 year old male.
I’ve had primary nocturnal enuresis for almost my entire life, and I’ve seen more urologists and specialists than I can even count. They’ve ruled out structural problems, and nothing has ever fixed it long term. I’ll sometimes go months without an accident, which gives me hope that maybe it’s finally over, but eventually it always comes back. Lately it’s been happening almost every day, and I feel like I’ve reached my breaking point.
What makes it even harder is that I recently started a full-time job. Every time I wake up after another accident, my morning immediately turns into throwing away a mattress pad, washing my clothes (and sometimes bedding if mattress pad moves around), taking a shower, and trying to get ready for work. It’s such a miserable way to start every single day, and mentally it’s wearing me down.
For years we’ve been able to get disposable mattress pads from relatives who weren’t using theirs, but I can’t keep relying on that forever. It feels embarrassing having to keep asking, and I know that’s not a long-term solution.
One thing I’ve struggled with is accepting the idea of wearing absorbent products. I know many adults here use them, and I truly don’t judge anyone who does. For me, though, I keep holding onto hope that the next specialist, the next treatment, or something new will finally fix this. Maybe that’s unrealistic, but it’s been hard to let go of that hope.
The only major change I can think of over the years is that I smoke cannabis more than I did when I was younger, and I drink alcohol occasionally, so I’ve wondered if either of those could be making things worse which I doubt tbh.
I’m starting therapy to try to cope with how much this affects my mental health, and my therapist suggested looking into bedwetting alarm therapy but I’ve only recently started talking to him. I’m also planning on getting an Apple Watch because I’m hoping the vibration alarm might be enough to wake me up during the night, although I’m not very optimistic since I’m such a deep sleeper.
Has anyone here with lifelong primary nocturnal enuresis actually found something that helped after years of nothing working? Did alarm therapy make a difference as an adult? Did reducing or quitting cannabis have any effect? And for those who eventually accepted wearing protection at night, how did you mentally get to that point?
I’m just very exhausted and I’ve questioned my life deeply growing up as a kid and even now as an adult as deep as begging god to make this stop and asking him why did he punish me so early in my life to make me this way. I feel like I’m stuck in the same loop every single day, and I’m hoping someone here has been where I am and found something that made life even a little bit better.