so I was jamming out having a great time with my Dreamcast. I put the controller down and the. Had like a 30 second fart.

I was like damn what is going on it just kept going and then my guts turned over a bit and I realized I had maybe 45 seconds max to get to a shitter.

It kind of annoyed me because I had been to Walmart earlier today and I normally take my diabolical dumps there when possible.

Love the Dreamcast though!

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u/JLandis84 — 2 days ago

Someone older than me said that smoking was really common in restaurants in the 1990s because back then it was culturally acceptable to fart at the dinner table and the smoke smell covered it up.

Is this true ?

For context they were talking about Fridays and Red Lobster especially.

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u/JLandis84 — 4 days ago

Help me decide the best time to fart. Crop dusting first class on an airplane, or crop dusting people on a first date at a nice restaurant. Or farting super loudly during a poetry reading?

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u/JLandis84 — 6 days ago

What fart optimization software are you guys using ?

Also, how are you using AI to enhance your farting experience ?

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u/JLandis84 — 11 days ago

In your store, how often does someone use the aisle/shelves as their bathroom ?

I’d say it’s every two weeks for me.

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u/JLandis84 — 12 days ago

Have you ever been asked to leave a restaurant because you farted too much ?

Closest I’ve gotten was a red lobster back in 2013. The booth next to me basically had a brown lobster experience despite the barrier between us.

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u/JLandis84 — 20 days ago

I like farting in the conference room before people use it.

I also try to fart in the hallways HR uses.

Where is your favorite work area to fart in ?

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u/JLandis84 — 21 days ago

I like farting in the conference room before people use it.

I also try to fart in the hallways HR uses.

Where is your favorite work area to fart in ?

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u/JLandis84 — 21 days ago
▲ 41 r/bonds

I’ve noticed a huge amount of Google/Amazon/Microsoft bonds for sale recently. It seems like it’s part of the AI arms race. Anyone here have thoughts about that ?

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u/JLandis84 — 29 days ago

Does your office/workplace have a daily fart goal ?

I know in most dollar stores like Dollar General the employees have a number of farts they’re supposed to emit a day. (It makes the customers feel like they’re at home).

Wondering if any other businesses do this besides Dollar Tree and Burger King ?

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u/JLandis84 — 1 month ago

If Dollar General had a professional management school, the top classes would be in treating associates like crap, increasing shrink, delaying repairs, and bringing customers who don’t wash their butts.

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u/JLandis84 — 1 month ago

What store do you prefer to fart in ? Mine is Dollar General.

But obviously if I’m at a restaurant I try to cropdust people who look like they’re on dates.

Once at a wedding I farted really loudly on the mother of the bride.

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u/JLandis84 — 1 month ago
▲ 30 r/MurderBryan+1 crossposts

A few minutes ago I trusted a fart. That fart was a LIAR, a DECEIVER.

Now my jorts are probably ruined. Take shart safety seriously.

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u/JLandis84 — 2 months ago

Anyone introduced to Star Wars by books/comics/audio or any other non screen experience ? Any blind fans out there ?

What was it like ? How long did you experience Star Wars just through books/comics.

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u/JLandis84 — 2 months ago