u/Middle_Highlight2683

I’ve been working since the second I turned 17, started at a fast food place, and have been working healthcare ever since. For context- I’m 21, so not super into life, but trying to build something for myself.

I started out making $15 an hour at my healthcare job. Did it for 3 years, got a 50 cent bonus. I was working 9 hrs, 5 days a week, taking care of minimum 16 patients.

I have my now job. Utter regret. I love it, I do! But I can hardly live. I pay my bills and am flat fucking broke. My fiancé and I are trying to save for a house- absolutely no chance with this job.

Just applied to a damn factory. Will I get it? Probably not due to wasting years in the healthcare field that doesn’t pay shit anymore. But I’m praying with everything in me I get this job. Literally all I want is to save money and get to live even somewhat comfortably with my fiancé.

Fuck the job market.

My 21st birthday is this week!!

Unfortunately, all the “fun” places in my town are strictly bars- and overrun with people who aren’t particularly my crowd.

I’m open most suggestions! I’m not the super “get up and dance” (in a “party” setting) type, nor a super heavy drinker. I’d love a little sit down, sip a drink and watch entertainment of some type and just have a good night type of vibe. :)

Edit to add: I’m also low on friends lol.. or friends that enjoy doing stuff. So, also open to new friends!

I really just need to get this off my chest, it affects me more than I’d tell most of my friends.

I’m suspected to have seizures. The first time was over a year ago, I was under the influence and then in the hot shower, I thought it was just the wrong mix.

I had one while at home, this one was a bit worse and I was insanely confused after. My roommate asked me simple questions, what I ate, which I had ate maybe 10 minutes prior, and I couldn’t tell her. The ER explained there was really no test I could take since it had already happened- but they suspected a seizure.

I’ve had a couple more since then. More absence seizures, but I know because normally when I come back to I don’t remmeber what the hell I was doing.

Today, it happened at work for the first time ever. It’s never majorly affected me since it’s always at home, or at irrelevant times. But today at work I was helping one of my patients, and what felt like forever later he was shaking my shoulder. I had to double check I was giving the right patient the right meds multiple times, I was terrified.

I’m terrified to lose my license, my career, everything.

I don’t have insurance, I “make too much” (I make $14.50 an hour) for insurance. I don’t know what the fuck to do.

For context, my fiancé is in the military. I knew this before dating, we talked IN DEPTH about everything before he left, we made future plans before he left, the whole thing.

My sister is normally the person to go “Oh? You havin good day? I know the perfect way to shit on it!”. She’s very, VERY negative. I’m talking if there’s some crazy “what if” scenario she can tell you to make you tweak, she will tell you!

She’s always pushed my fiancé’s buttons about his job. During Christmas she essentially made a comment about how he was “just leaving me behind”.

We got engaged, she made a comment that a ring means nothing when his minds set on “something else”(cheating). We are literally moving together, I’ve heard his friends comment on the way he talks about me, some have even reminded him I’m his fiancée, not wife yet lol. But- he continues to call me his wife.

I called my mother to mention something he discussed with me, just a “please listen I need to get this off my chest”. I didn’t realize I was on speaker, and my sister was there. She very quickly threw in the “he can just leave now” comment, and added a “he obviously doesn’t care about you if he chooses this job”. This has been the most extreme comment she’s made about us.

I don’t care, genuinely. Not to be that person, her life sucks. Her fiancé sucks, and does not even be bare minimum. I don’t think he even did anything for her birthday. I almost found it funny, cause who says that??

I just needed to tell someone this lol, I was genuinely stunned and have never ended a phone call so quickly 😭

I (20F) have lived with my roommate (21F) for almost a year, previously we’ve been best friends since middle school.

Recently, our personalities have not aligned. She is not someone I want to surround myself with anymore, but I will not be moving for another 6 months.
We had a discussion on how living would go from here on out- which is just to leave each other alone and to be our own people and not be together 24/7.

During our talk, she did tell me she was “just going to start having people over”.

She used to do this, and I’m talking it’s every night. I would come home to people sleeping on our couch, her siblings using my blankets in such. When she gets in the mood to invite people over- the living room becomes unusable to any and everyone else. If you walk out there, they all stop and stare at you. And this could go on for days, making it to where I have to be in my room.

And it wasn’t just her friends. It was men she had been meeting for the first time and immediately bringing them home.

Sue me for not wanting essentially all of her friends to also be living with us, plus having to meet strange men every other week. Is this picky of me to be upset?

I think I also resent this, because she doesn’t do anything. She doesn’t clean, keep the house is appropriate conditions, and then expects to do whatever she wants.

I(20F) have been living with my best friend(21F), for almost a year now. We’ve had our scuffles and what not, but generally been okay.

Here recently- she has genuinely contributed to me feeling like shit, and has me questioning everything.

She never talks TO me anymore. It’s always always talking AT me. I can’t talk to her cause chances are she will interrupt and start a story or conversation of her own, and I won’t be able to get a word in. And she just, always talks about herself. Anything you talk about will likely circle back to her. My mental health has been shit already. I feel so out of character. I feel like I have begged and begged her for something, anything. Hell just sit and act like you care even. But that circled back to being about her too. I straight up said “all I want is reassurance and someone to listen”- it circled back to being about her. She is adamant I downplay everything she says, but all I want is for her to talk TO me, rather than sit and talk AT me. I cannot engage in conversation with her anymore at this point cause I know I will be interrupted, I know she will just sit and tangent on without letting me get a word in.

I have so much resentment because I feel like she only keeps me around to take care of the house. If I didn’t, it would probably be filthy. She has told me for weeks she would do dishes- and they are actively still sitting. Her cat’s litter boxes rarely get cleaned, the filth we live in affects my mental health daily. I immediately get stressed or pissed the second I leave my room everyday. And that isn’t exaggerating, it is everyday. Some days I leave my room, and genuinely immediately sob and go back cause it’s so overwhelming to me. And she doesn’t seem to understand why it upsets me.

You can’t talk to her like an adult. You have to baby talk her. I scooped mold out of her cats litter box and she again didn’t seem to understand why I was upset. It’s excuse after excuse when you confront her about something- or ask her to do something.

She is so negative she is pulling me down with her. The moment she opens her eyes in the morning, it’s negativity. I don’t know how she does it, cause it majorly affects ME. So I’m shocked she can wake up and do it everyday. I don’t remember the last time she came home from work in a decent mood. Which-yes, jobs suck. Make the most of it, don’t walk around sulking and bringing other people’s mental health down to.

Except she will NEVER take accountability. She will never admit her wrongs, and every argument for the rest of time will end with I’m being mean and I’m in the wrong. The second you bring something up, it’s deflected onto you. She goes and tells all her family and friends her ideal “why is she being mean” scenario. Doesn’t tell them about the state of the house, the litter boxes stinking from outside her room/bathroom, none of that.

I genuinely feel insane, I feel hurt, I feel mad. I don’t know where to go from here and it’s eating me alive. I’m stuck in a friendship where it feels like the other hasn’t cared, for a WHILE. And there’s no talking to her because she will deflect or get defensive when I talk about what she’s doing “wrong”. No matter what I do, what I say, she will likely end up upset. So we will probably make a makeshift “hey we’re fine” and then go back to her talking at me everyday. I miss her, i love her so so much, and god I wish we were okay. But I feel like she does not care about me anymore, nor has she for awhile.

Hi! I(20f) will be hopefully moving in with my fiancé (21m) within around 6ish months!

We are trying to be smart about it, so it may or may not take a little longer. We want to have fallback money, be able to pay the bills(obviously), and just be able to live as comfortably as we can with such a big change. But we also want to be realistic.

Right now, I’m waiting for an interview with a new job. I will be bringing home around $1,600 (before taxes) every 2 weeks.

Right now, every 2 weeks my bills are about 900. This is internet, utility, rent, my car payment, car insurance, the necessary stuff(besides gas which changes). I would really like to pay my bills, give myself maybe $100 of “fun” money, put some towards my medical debt, and the rest go to savings.

I don’t know if this is realistic, putting a couple hundred in savings every 2 weeks seems very heavy and almost undoable, even though it definitely seems it is at the same time.

Is this a good saving “plan”? I used to be quite the spender- but I’m really trying to hunker down for this move and essentially do anything I can to save. Any advice is good advice !:)

If you couldn’t tell, I’m the SO with bipolar lol. I am open to fellow people with bipolar, or S/O’s to someone with bipolar on the best way to go about this. This is my first decent flare up since being with my fiancé, and coping/discussing in a healthy manner is very important to me. This might seem rambly, cause there is so many aspects to how I feel it amazes me. I’m constantly crying, or pissed off.

For context, my fiancé and I are recently engaged. He’s in the military, and has recently been stationed with his close friends, whom are mostly women.

These girls have been nothing short of respectful to me, and my fiancé is the “hey nice meeting you wanna hear about my girl?” type. But I’m surrounded with so much negativity and stress that I can barely even think about the good. My own family has told me to be weary of him cheating. I trust this man with my life, but being constantly reminded of this sucks.

My best friend of years is impossible to speak to without her trying to “one-up” and remind me her issues are worse than mine. I’m trying to build a life with my fiancé but am essentially taking care of family members as well as my best friend/roommate. If I don’t clean the house, it will sit in filth for weeks. But I also have to work full time, now including a second job, on top of it. My pets are also a very big priority for me, so add them on top of all that.

I’m so scared of disappointing my fiancé. I come from a family of essentially doing the bare minimum. Most of my family is not married- and has lived in our tiny town for their whole lives. My fiancé wants to get married, live together travel etc. this is my dream, quite literally all I want but all I can think about is how hard I’m already working and I still feel so far behind him. I’m trying so hard to save while also living paycheck to paycheck, and trying to not overwork myself. I’m in 3k of medical debt, and he knows that, but I just feel so far behind him.

Despite it, he’s my only positive. Getting married and living together is the only thing I look forward to. I feel awful for overthinking, and being so upset about seemingly nothing directly after our engagement. He’s always been so supportive, and essentially my rock. I WANT to talk to him so badly about how I feel- and I know he’d give me the same “I love you, this is how we’ll work through this”, except I just can’t get myself to talk. I can’t bring myself to burden him, even knowing it would probably help me AND him in the long run. I’m getting mad/upset at everything, and I feel the least I owe him is an explanation. But again, I feel awful. I feel like a burden, I feel like I’m disrespecting him, I just don’t know.

I also don’t want to leach onto him. I already feel like I rely so much on him to be happy because I’m surrounded with so many negative people. He is truly one of the only positive people in my life. He has ambition, he stays positive. Everyone around me does the bare minimum and reminds me how shit life is- and I did that to myself.

I guess I just don’t know if laying it out on the table and discussing this with him is the right move. We’ve always been very communicative, and our conversations never really end in argument or anything. We stay very level headed- but I’m terrified. I’m terrified he’s gonna be upset, I’m terrified I’m gonna scare him, I feel awful about feeling this way. I just want to make sure I’m not making his life hell.

Edit to add: I just wanna be clear I have never taken these feelings out on him. He quite honestly doesn’t really know I’m struggling until tonight when I just shut down and got quiet. He asked me what was wrong, and I said we could talk about it tomorrow since he had to sleep. My biggest concern is how to handle it properly without hurting either of us. I wanna talk about it, but I don’t know if it’s the right move.

This might seem rambly, as there is just so many aspects to what has been upsetting me. I haven’t had a flare up like this in a while, and I feel like a piece of shit basically.

I have been getting upset at EVERYTHING. My body is essentially craving reassurance and I just can’t get myself to talk to anybody.

A bit of context, my fiancé and I are recently engaged. We have always ALWAYS had a very healthy relationship. He’s in the military, and recently was stationed with mostly his female friends. Most of the time when he calls, they are there, or he talks about something they did. In the moment I’m okay, and then later I end up crying. I have never been the one to think this way, it seems contradictory, but I trust him with my life. I feel so insanely out of character and disrespectful to him for feeling this way. He is VERY loud about us being engaged, and I’ve talked to said female friends myself. And I don’t even know why I’m upset. I don’t know why it makes me cry. The second he calls, I’m as happy as can be, and then later I’m crying.

I’ve never been too reliant on him, as long distance kinda forces me not to be. But I feel like I’m only happy when I talk to him.

I’m surrounded by so many negative people, and I regret almost daily that I chose to surround myself with these people. When I try to talk to my best friend of years about my feelings, it ends up being a “well my issues are a bit worse so” fest. My own family has told me multiple times that I need to be weary of my fiancé cheating.

I feel awful to him that I can’t even explain in real words to him why I’m upset. I can’t bring myself to even say anything because I feel rude. We just got engaged, we’re discussing marriage and living together, I have nothing to be upset about but I also feel like everything is upsetting. I have zero want or need to talk to anyone but him. I don’t want to be his problem, but I feel like he is genuinely the only person who cares and has a positive outlook on things.

I’m just either crying or mad all the time. I’m sick of negativity, I’m sick of being surrounded with people who don’t care about me or themselves.

I feel like the only thing I have to look forward to is moving in with my fiancé. But again, I feel just as shitty being such a big responsibility for him. He is my comfort person, and has ALWAYS been amazing at handling my not so pretty moments. We have always been that person for each other. But this time feels different, and I want to talk to him so bad but I physically cannot get myself to.

I just recently stretched my septum to a 14g.

This is my first septum stretch, and I’ve only really heard about the bigger stretches being a pain in the ass.

However, my septum is SORE. The initial stretch (putting the jewlery in) was easy and relatively painless. But now it just feels, tight? I’ve been avoiding even bumping my nose because it’s so sore. There was a couple blood “crusties” when I cleaned it, but is this normal or should I size back down? I didn’t wanna remove it/mess with it to much and irritate it more, and maybe see if it calms down within a couple days as my skin is normally just more sensitive. But I’m worried this is abnormal.

If I inject with just denatured alcohol, can I fixate with a mix of denatured and isopropyl until tomorrow?

I injected him, thought the amount of denatured I had left would cover my specimen, but it did not.

It’s currently midnight so no shops are open, but I plan on going to get denatured alcohol asap tomorrow!