u/NeitherSmell9571

I cammed and sold content on a few platforms years ago. I'm 38 and considering dipping back in to a specific niche but not wanting to burn out and waste time. Is streammate a good one? I think I was on my free cams and chaturbate back in the day. Would you suggest multi streaming?

I signed up for niteflirt about a week ago. Someone i know is doing pretty good starting out but it seems dated and you absolutely have to pay just to be seen which I'm not into. Thanks for your suggestions.

I rented an apartment in Portland, Oregon for about 8 years. My tenancy was month-to-month for 6 years and I originally paid a $1,300 security deposit.

In March, I gave my landlord written notice that I was terminating my tenancy and moved out. My partner decided to stay in the apartment. The landlord told me that because my partner remained, I was supposedly still the legal tenant, and he did not return or account for my deposit.

About a month ago, however, the landlord had my partner sign a new lease in his own name. I am not on that lease. I also never agreed to transfer my $1,300 deposit to my partner or allow it to be used as security for his tenancy.

As far as I can tell, the landlord has simply carried my deposit over despite replacing me with a different leaseholder.

Can the landlord legally continue holding my $1,300 under these circumstances? Does my partner remaining in possession mean my tenancy couldn't terminate when I gave notice, even though the landlord has since entered into a new rental agreement solely with him?

I'm especially interested in how ORS 90.300 applies here and whether the 31-day deposit accounting requirement was triggered either when I terminated my tenancy or when the landlord replaced it with my partner's new lease.

The landlord is an attorney, so I'd like to understand my position before formally demanding the deposit back.

I rented an apartment in Portland, Oregon for about 8 years. My tenancy was month-to-month for 6 years and I originally paid a $1,300 security deposit.

In March, I gave my landlord written notice that I was terminating my tenancy and moved out. My partner decided to stay in the apartment. The landlord told me that because my partner remained, I was supposedly still the legal tenant, and he did not return or account for my deposit.

About a month ago, however, the landlord had my partner sign a new lease in his own name. I am not on that lease. I also never agreed to transfer my $1,300 deposit to my partner or allow it to be used as security for his tenancy.

As far as I can tell, the landlord has simply carried my deposit over despite replacing me with a different leaseholder.

Can the landlord legally continue holding my $1,300 under these circumstances? Does my partner remaining in possession mean my tenancy couldn't terminate when I gave notice, even though the landlord has since entered into a new rental agreement solely with him?

I'm especially interested in how ORS 90.300 applies here and whether the 31-day deposit accounting requirement was triggered either when I terminated my tenancy or when the landlord replaced it with my partner's new lease.

The landlord is an attorney, so I'd like to understand my position before formally demanding the deposit back.

I rented an apartment in Portland, Oregon for about 8 years. My tenancy was month-to-month for 6 years and I originally paid a $1,300 security deposit.

In March, I gave my landlord written notice that I was terminating my tenancy and moved out. My partner decided to stay in the apartment. The landlord told me that because my partner remained, I was supposedly still the legal tenant, and he did not return or account for my deposit.

About a month ago, however, the landlord had my partner sign a new lease in his own name. I am not on that lease. I also never agreed to transfer my $1,300 deposit to my partner or allow it to be used as security for his tenancy.

As far as I can tell, the landlord has simply carried my deposit over despite replacing me with a different leaseholder.

Can the landlord legally continue holding my $1,300 under these circumstances? Does my partner remaining in possession mean my tenancy couldn't terminate when I gave notice, even though the landlord has since entered into a new rental agreement solely with him?

I'm especially interested in how ORS 90.300 applies here and whether the 31-day deposit accounting requirement was triggered either when I terminated my tenancy or when the landlord replaced it with my partner's new lease.

The landlord is an attorney, so I'd like to understand my position before formally demanding the deposit back.

I've noticed that when I feel isolated or sidelined as a grown adult, I become hyper focused on food and nutrition.

For context, I struggled with bulimia, restriction, and body dysmorphia for years. I feel mostly recovered now, though I still don't think I always see my body accurately. I've been slightly underweight slightly over and everything in-between so it's kind of a mind f approaching a healthy and sustainable lifestyle.

What's interesting is that this doesn't feel like my eating disorder. It's more like nutrition has become a hobby. I enjoy hitting my protein goals, planning meals, cooking, and seeing progress. It gives me structure and something I can actually influence when other parts of life feel stagnant or beyond my control.

I'm wondering if this is a healthy coping mechanism or if it's still a leftover way of seeking control.

My partner has been drinking every day for years, but lately things feel different. Over the past few nights he's passed out outside in a chair and slept outside most of the night. Our roommate recently told me he's worried too, which made me realize this isn't just something I've been noticing.

He also owes me about $700, took my only phone charger without asking, and refused to help clean up around the house. None of those things on their own would have prompted me to post, but together I feel increasingly alone in the relationship. It doesn't feel like we're functioning as a team anymore.

I don't know where the line is between "this is just how he is" and "this is a problem." If you've had a partner who drank daily, when did you realize the drinking was affecting your life? What boundaries helped you most?

I'm not looking for anyone to diagnose him. I'm trying to understand whether I've been minimizing what I've been living with and learn from people who have been in a similar position.

Location Oregon

I was the only person on a residential lease.

I gave proper written notice to terminate my tenancy, moved out on the agreed date, and the landlord acknowledged in writing that he accepted my notice.

After I moved out, two people remained in the unit. Neither was on my lease. Instead of requiring them to leave, the landlord immediately began accepting rent from them directly, even though they never signed a lease.

The landlord refused to return or account for my security deposit, arguing that because the unit wasn't completely vacated, my tenancy hadn't ended and he didn't have to start the timeline for returning the deposit.

My question is whether a landlord who accepts rent from occupants who are not on my lease after I've vacated can still argue that my tenancy never ended for purposes of withholding my security deposit.

Does accepting rent from those occupants create a new tenancy or otherwise undermine the argument that my lease continued?

Are there any Oregon statutes or cases that address this situation?

I have documentation showing:

- I was the sole leaseholder.

- I gave written notice.

- The landlord accepted my notice in writing.

- I moved out on time.

- The landlord accepted rent from the remaining occupants after I left.

- The landlord withheld my deposit because the unit wasn't fully vacated.

Location: OR, USA

I ended a business relationship with someone. There was no contract between us, and I didn't owe them any money.

After I ended the relationship, they began demanding compensation. A third party relayed to me that this person said they would damage my reputation if I didn't pay. Around the same time, I received a voice memo from them saying they would "go public," although they didn't explain what they meant.

Afterward, negative statements about me spread within my professional community. I eventually sent a cease-and-desist letter because false statements and vague posts were continuing.

From a legal perspective, if someone later makes false statements about you, does evidence like the relayed threat and the voice memo have legal significance, or is it generally viewed as part of an ordinary business dispute?

Location: OR, USA

I ended a business relationship with someone. There was no contract between us, and I didn't owe them any money.

After I ended the relationship, they began demanding compensation. A third party relayed to me that this person said they would damage my reputation if I didn't pay. Around the same time, I received a voice memo from them saying they would "go public," if I didn't pay, although they didn't explain what they meant.

Afterward, negative statements about me spread within my professional community. I eventually sent a cease-and-desist letter because false statements/posts were continuing.

From a legal perspective, if someone later makes false statements about you, does evidence like the relayed threat and the voice memo have legal significance, or is it generally viewed as part of an ordinary business dispute?

Location: OR, USA

Has anyone dealt with a venue refusing to return a deposit when no contract was signed?

I have a prior history of renting this venue, so there was an existing relationship. I paid a $1,000 deposit but the event didn't happen. They say 25% is non-refundable, but I never signed a contract agreeing to those terms. I also later found out they never blocked off my dates and continued accepting bookings.

Advice?

One of the most confusing parts of living with CPTSD has been trying to understand multifaceted betrayal.

Years before I ever became the target of a smear campaign, one of my closest friends made a public post saying, "I stand with him," in support of a man who had served eight years in prison for sexually assaulting a woman.

At the time, I remember feeling disturbed by it, but I told myself people are complicated and cognitive dissonance is real.

Then years later, I became the target of a smear campaign in a niche community after setting boundaries with someone.

Watching my closest friend and another person accommodate it was the hardest part.

She believed the person smearing me deserved compensation for appearing briefly in collaborative footage that none of us individually owned. She encouraged me to pay the person who was actively attacking me rather than asking harder questions about what was happening. She refused to share a promotional video we had both participated in because she had accepted that narrative. When I tried to explain that no one owned the footage, it didn't seem to matter.

Over the years, I also noticed a broader pattern. When conversations involved people expressing or supporting racist ideas, she often framed them as "ideological differences" rather than engaging with the harm involved. I increasingly felt that preserving peace and avoiding conflict took precedence over taking a clear moral position when doing so carried social consequences.

She seemed to prioritize preserving peace over standing beside people when doing so carried social risk.

Looking back, those experiences became linked in my nervous system.

She had publicly stood beside someone convicted of harming another person but didn't stand with me when it mattered.

We've been friends for many years, and that's what makes this so painful.

For those of you with CPTSD: would this be enough for you to distance yourself from a long-term friendship? Or would you see this as something worth working through? I'm struggling to tell the difference between honoring my own boundaries and walking away because old attachment wounds make betrayal feel especially overwhelming.

I'm trying to understand a pattern experienced in creative communities and over the course of life.

Someone I've collaborated with took my classes, asked me for advice on producing a show and what to pay artists, and I happily shared everything I knew. I've invited them into events to teach, etc. Later, when I reached out with a simple question, I never got a response and their energy was weird towards me.

Now I see them thriving, collaborating, and building community, and I can't help but feel like I was valuable when I had something to offer but easy to sideline. (Just through the grapevine of people tagging them etc, not seeking it out).

I know no one owes me friendship or continued communication, but it left me wondering whether some people value your knowledge, connections, and generosity more than they value you. It also made me wonder how often exclusion is intentional versus something we read into.

To add to my uncertainty, this person has privately described other people as "bitter," among other things which made me question whether there's a broader pattern in how they relate to others or whether I'm simply overthinking my own experience.

Has anyone else navigated something like this? How do you tell the difference between ordinary social drift, intentional exclusion, and relationships that become one-sided? I'd really appreciate thoughtful perspectives.

My partner came to visit me, and I unexpectedly ended up paying for almost the entire trip. That included buying his flight home because the understanding was that he'd pay me back after he got paid.

Payday came, but instead of paying me back, he said he had to pay rent first and would reimburse me next week. Then, before paying me back, he asked if I could also pitch in for his electric bill.

At this point, he owes me about $1,300, and honestly, that's after being generous. If I counted every expense I covered, it would be more.

I'm not upset that someone has bills. Life happens. What I'm struggling with is being asked to contribute even more while I'm still waiting to be repaid for money I fronted with the expectation that it was a loan.

If you owed someone $1,300, would you ask them to help pay your electric bill before paying them back?

Volaris ultimately got $220 from me over what I believed was a flight change fee. At the airport, I was charged $110 for what was presented to me as the fee to change my flight. Minutes later, I logged into my Volaris account and completed the exact same flight change online for $0.

That's when I realized the $110 wasn't actually the cost of changing the flight—it appeared to be an airport service fee that wasn't clearly disclosed as such. After I disputed the original charge, I was later told I had to pay another $110 to board my flight.

To make matters worse, SoFi denied my dispute and sided with the merchant without disclosing the merchant's response or evidence to me. Has anyone else dealt with something like this, either with Volaris or with SoFi? Unbelievable

I booked a Spa Pass through ResortPass because the listing said it was valid from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. and listed amenities including the hydrotherapy pool, sauna, steam room, hot tub, cold plunge, and relaxation lounge. I expected to be able to enjoy the spa at my own pace.

Instead, I was escorted through a hydrotherapy circuit with an attendant, and the entire experience was over in about 30 minutes. Before it began, I signed a hydrotherapy form that referenced a 50-minute session. When I later asked for a copy of that document, the spa declined to provide it.

If this is actually a guided hydrotherapy session, why isn't the listing clearly labeled as one? Calling it a "Spa Pass" that is valid from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. gave me a completely different expectation.

I've asked ResortPass for a refund because I don't believe the experience matched what was advertised. Has anyone else had something similar happen?

I've been staying at a place over a month and recently the owner has come onto my private deck several times (listed and disclosed as a private area) to hang her clothes to dry (Mexico without a dryer).

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She respects my privacy otherwise, but it's not a cheap or communal place so I'm not sure whether or not to bring it up or just let it be? Thoughts?

I haven't noticed any recent posts of emotionally charged places or sites lately to read. It doesn't have to be charged persey just a photo of room etc.

If you feel called to share any i would love that. Not necessarily in this thread, but I seem to have a strength with that as opposed to name guessing and I bet some of you do also. The object in hand I can frequently receive a clairvoyant impression of in a second that isn’t always detaied, but often accurate. Thanks in advance ☺️