u/No_Radish4428

I don't know why, but ever since I can remember I've had this massive inclination to fight and debate things for no reason. I don't even notice I'm doing it sometimes, it's like breathing. I see every interaction like there's a winner and loser and will systematically and aggressively counter every command, opinion, or piece of advice I'm given, and when people inevitably become irate and stop responding, it feels abrupt and unjust to me, leaving me very frustrated and like I can't have conversations or help doesn't exist for me. Not only that, but I will regularly seek out posts on here where I can argue about something in a drawn out, unnecessarily inflammatory way because the fact that I have this urge to be right and "win" makes me assume everyone else does too and I have to overcompensate for their theoretical aggression, paradoxically triggering it. I legitimately don't know how to respond to people in a different way. Do you relate? What are you supposed to say when someone tells you something you already knew or gives you advice you already tried?

I (18F) have felt fundamentally unattractive since middle school. I had a pretty best friend at the time, so naturally that brought comparisons, and guys my age have almost always treated me like I have leprosy. I know I am capable of posing and painting my face up to about a seven, but I despise the way I look naturally and cannot even fathom the idea of someone I'm even slightly attracted to being attracted to me. Despite this, I manage to take pride in my style and taste, I dress and do my makeup very intentionally and have a vision for how I want to look that I refuse to give up on. This is effective in getting me compliments from other girls, but female admiration does not equate to potential male attraction. I have had one relationship that lasted for five months, and I've been single for two years with almost zero chances at another relationship. I am capable of seeing myself as pretty in the moment, but that depends entirely on accessories. I haven't been able to look at my bare face and like what I see in years. Every time I have my eye on someone I convince myself there's no way I'd have a chance because if they have the capacity to be attractive to me, they must have better options and could not possibly even see me as a human, let alone a potential partner. I don't have the social access to be able to or feasibly comfortable with asking someone out, nor the confidence to take a rejection. No matter what I do or wear, I can't feel feminine and pretty enough to feel like I could possibly appear even remotely sexual to anyone, even if I feel confident and like myself that day. Is there a way to get past this? I worry I've been creeping into femcel territory for a while and do not want to be there.

I used to be an extremely obsessive, driven, and passionate creative. At 16, I wrote, recorded, and produced an entire album by myself in the span of a year. I could spin any concept into imagery in either prose or visuals. It was so automatic, like breathing. My art was all I was and I needed it to make me a star. Eventually though, the isolation after loss of my entire friend group caught up with me and I realized I'd said all I had to say about it and my loneliness. I stopped feeling inspired. I kept trying to force it, I still try to force it and more often than not come up dry. It doesn't feel like it used to. I don't feel like I used to. I can't recognize myself under the atrophy of my passion and inspiration. It takes me hours to come up with a mechanically decent verse and I used to write whole songs in less than an hour. I would do anything to get my inspiration back. I don't know how to live outside of my music and art and I've spent the past while tirelessly fixating on my intelligence, my beauty, trying to show myself that I'm capable of living, that I'm worth sticking around, further starving the only part of me I'm capable of seeing as worthwhile. I don't feel capable of anything now. My grades have dropped, I keep losing my train of thought, and I just don't know how to describe anything anymore. Nothing feels right. It's all out of place, and none of it's mine. I feel like a failure. I can't keep doing this. I just graduated high school and this is not how I want to start my adult life.

I've been walking roughly every day indoors for a few months now, usually for about 20-40 minutes, until I'm too dizzy and exhausted to continue. always had decent cardiovascular health, I can skateboard for 1-1.5 hours and be mostly fine, but every time I walk for this long it's hard for me to stay conscious after sitting back down. I become extremely fatigued and lightheaded, both feelings remaining for up to an hour after, and am dizzy for the first few minutes of sitting. it's worse some days and better others with no consistent pattern that I can call to mind. is this normal?

I need to stop scrolling but will bypass every app limit I set for myself if I have the means. a simple reminder feels like an intrusive command, so I don't trust myself to heed standard screen time limits. Do you know of an app or feature that I would not be able to bypass?

I am 17F, 5'7, 50kg. I take 2mg ER guanfacine for ADHD. At 10pm last night, I took my standard dose, but at 10am this morning, I had forgotten this and took another pill. I have felt absolutely fine all day and my heart rate has been hovering around 84 and 92bpm since I've started checking it tonight. I've started feeling drowsy, but it's also 4am where I am so that's not particularly conclusive. I'm not worried that this will be fatal, but I am extremely worried about vomiting. Is that a likely side effect? I've contacted my country (Canada)'s equivalent of poison control and have not heard back. Should I be more worried about this than I am?

I am 17F, 5'7, 50kg. I take 2mg ER guanfacine for ADHD. At 10pm last night, I took my standard dose, but at 10am this morning, I had forgotten this and took another pill. I have felt absolutely fine all day and my heart rate has been hovering around 84 and 92bpm since I've started checking it tonight. I've started feeling drowsy, but it's also 4am where I am so that's not particularly conclusive. I'm not worried that this will be fatal, but I am extremely worried about vomiting. Is that a likely side effect? I've contacted my country (Canada)'s equivalent of poison control and have not heard back. Should I be more worried about this than I am?

I am terrified. I saw a clothes moth and it is presumed dead now. my room is quite cluttered but I agitate the clutter a lot, down to the rug (synthetic), the only animal fiber I have in my room beyond my own hair, nail clippings, and dead skin is one wool sweater and a silk pillowcase. I wash my pillowcase with the rest of my sheets weekly and agitate my pillows constantly. I vacuumed the area between my wall and my bed super thoroughly a few days ago for the first time in months and I didn't see any webbing or larvae casings. the moth was up near my LED strips and seemed attracted to light. I've never seen one before. I'm so scared I have an infestation.

I cannot stand myself. I'm(18F) the only person I know that's unemployed, I have no partner, and I can't take criticism without it reaffirming all of the worst beliefs about myself, it's so reflexive for me to look exclusively inside myself, and I just can't stop taking everything that happens around me, regardless of what it has to do with me, as proof that I don't deserve anything. how can I stop doing this?

I have been having a lot of problems both with saying offensive things without realizing they're considered offensive and reacting affrontedly to things that aren't rude. I really would like to stop this because it is straining my relationships with my loved ones and if I don't fix my behaviour I'm afraid I'll never be able to be happy or exist like other people do.

Recently, the microwave in my(18F) house broke. We bought a new one a few days ago, it's one of those "smart" ones with a screen and a generally uncanny-sleek, minimalist look which I resent because I think it's frivolous to have a microwave that has the capability to connect to the internet, and I do not support simplistic design that impacts the user friendliness of an appliance. anyways, it was installed today and upon seeing it, I mentioned to my dad that it looked like a '60s interpretation of a futuristic TV. He said that it was not chosen for its appearance and I replied that I could tell. He then became annoyed with me and asked why I had to be so negative all the time. I don't think I was particularly negative. I was, at worst, mildly criticizing it. It wasn't like I said it was a piece of garbage and should be destroyed, but who knows. I am well aware that my sense of what is and isn't offensive is not particularly developed, so maybe this was some kind of faux pas. AITAH?