u/Perfect_Sink_6542

Hi,

I’ve had persistent thrush in the past, which went away a few years ago with a 6 month course of oral antifungals(!). But I suspect maybe there was something else going on as I also had chronic acid reflux (maybe fungal environment?)

Anyway, it’s back with pregnancy and it’s mild and mostly asymptomatic except slight discharge and discomfort with sex. Has anyone had this and treated it successfully?

I’m wondering if it’s worth leaving it alone and just cutting down on sugar, hot washing underwear and avoiding tight clothing and baths as I don’t want to throw lots of treatments at it if it’s just a hormonal thing. Any advice?

Just wanted to vent.

My husband and I are expecting our first baby after infertility and a difficult year. We are so excited and couldn’t wait to announce to the wider family (aunts, uncles, cousins etc).

My family already know as I’ve been telling the ones I’m in touch with as and when I get a chance to speak to them face to face or over the phone /video call. I started sharing the news around 18-19 weeks.

MIL expressed that in their family, nobody announces or makes a big deal of pregnancy and that she doesn’t think we should make any sort of announcement. We explained that we wanted to, and wanted it to be cute / funny and memorable.

She’s now mentioned this and tried to push back / get SIL to advise us, to the extent that we’re feeling not only pressured but annoyed and frustrated that something joyful has turned into an ongoing argument. I don’t feel like doing it anymore. And I may look back and regret that, but I’m just put off. Because it turned into an argument between my husband and my MIL, she changed her mind without telling us she had, and has now backtracked saying that actually she had planned to “surprise” us by getting everyone together so that my husband and I can still make our announcement.

My husband does understand my frustrations, but unfortunately he struggles to communicate with my MIL as he gets quickly frustrated and isn’t always clear and direct with communication about these kinds of things

Just a vent because I can’t do anything else about it at the moment. Feel like another special, memorable and personal thing has been ruined by my MIL needing to control everything.

Currently 21 weeks and dealing with PGP. I’m sleeping with a pillow between my legs now; trying to correct my posture when working or sitting on the sofa; and doing physio recommended exercises.

I need some recommendations for comfy and supportive house slippers, and everyday shoes that will help prevent any further pain.

Budget is £80 for shoes and £20 for slippers, or £100 in total

Any recommendations?

I’m planning to attend The Baby Show tomorrow (day 2), and wondering how day 1 went if anyone attended it in Birmingham?

Keeping this thread also for anyone who wants to share their experiences from day 2 and 3

For context, I have an anterior placenta. I’ve been feeling what I can only assume is movement from around 17 weeks. These I initially thought were mini cramps or uterus stretching, but after a week or so I started thinking they might be movements. I feel them around my belly button most, but sometimes near my bladder or in other areas.

However they’ve never felt like flutters, goldfish, or painless twitches. I thought with an anterior placenta I wouldn’t even feel them, but is it normal for movement to feel like a slight “twang” that I can only describe as a mini poke / kick / jab. They are ever so slightly painful / uncomfortable.

I don’t feel any other kind of movement and I have no idea if this actually is movement, but it’s been pretty consistent for the last 2 weeks.

Anyone else feel it this way?

I overreacted to a very minor situation I had blown up in my head, and send someone a long upset message. I’ve had to apologise for overreacting, and had a little cry about the guilt of that, and emotions feeling out of control.

What dumb emotional thing have you done lately?

Hi all, I’m looking for babymoon recommendations to places that:

- Are affordable
- Aren’t too hot (I can handle up to maybe 26 degrees?)

I’ll be around 24-27 weeks at this time

Any recommendations? We are currently thinking Madeira, but unsure

It’s Saturday evening and we’ve spent the day with my in laws. They knew we were coming, but MIL has been off and upset with my husband for a while and is also taking it out on me. Apart from hello, she’s not said a word to me all day.

We went on a walk in the park and I just chatted to SIL and another cousin who thankfully tagged along. Later, at dinner, not a word. SIL mentioned that MIL suggested we all get lunch tomorrow. When I said that’s a great idea, MIL acted really uncertain and said she’s not sure it’ll still go ahead and doesn’t know whether it’s possible etc. I can’t help feeling unwelcome.

I don’t know what she’s holding against me but it’s the second or third time she’s iced out both of us for something one of us may or may not have done.

Husband usually says to ignore and that we can skip the next visit if she carries on being immature, but that there’s no point leaving abruptly. But I kind of want to make a statement. Is it rude / would it make things a lot worse if we left tomorrow without spending all of Sunday with them too? Or I suppose we can just do our own thing all day and then leave? I feel bad because SIL has been really nice, but I just hate pandering to MILs moods. I am finding her increasingly controlling, passive aggressive, and finding it harder each time to put up with the judgement and need to have things her way.

It hurts more because I’m 19 weeks pregnant and she hasn’t once asked how I am.

They also made a spontaneous day trip plan for the bank holiday Monday and we had no idea, so I’m working all day (self employed) and we have evening plans with some friends in our city (1.5 hours away) SIL said it’s a shame but no problem and we can go again to the same place another time. MIL hasn’t said a word.

UPDATE: husband is speaking to MIL and we are leaving today, probably after a nice lunch with SIL.

My SIL is 4 years younger than me, and we generally get along very well and have had no real issues since I’ve joined the family. However, she has some views I don’t 100% agree with, i.e believes the home is 100% a woman’s responsibility. Regardless, we don’t talk about this much, and she has seen me look after our home as well as work. She’s also seen my husband pitch in to help.

Recently, SIL called my husband because he had a disagreement with his mother. She called wanting to help, but ended up telling my husband that she feels he doesn’t support his mother enough, and that we live too far and he can’t fulfil his duties as a son etc. She tried to convince him we need to move back to his hometown ASAP (we have a baby due in 5 months), and that he can’t leave his mother alone etc. For the record, my MIL is healthy and fit and runs a successful business. SIL lives at home so MIL is not alone.

Here’s the comment that has most unsettled me, though. SIL told my husband that one of the reasons we need to move home is so that I get support when the baby comes. She told him a story about someone she knows who had a baby, moved near the wife’s family, and then post baby the wife developed PPD. She said the wife also had multiple sclerosis. And she claims that post baby, the wife “does nothing” and “doesn’t work; doesn’t look after baby; doesn’t do anything in the house” and that her husband does everything at home. Then she added “I’m not saying your wife would be like that, but I want to avoid that kind of thing happening to you”

I don’t know what to make of this weird story / anecdote? It’s made me feel so uncomfortable, that rather than saying they want to offer me support postpartum, she’s making it sound like it’s more about making sure I don’t take advantage of my husband and all the load doesn’t fall on him. It felt like such a strange and manipulative thing to say.

The weirdest thing is that she shared this same story with me just a couple of weeks prior. I didn’t really know what to make of it then, either. I don’t know the couple in question or their circumstances. If they’re happy, maybe it works for them that the husband takes on more household chores and the wife is a SAHM? SIL said her friend told her this story and that it’s about the friend’s brother. It felt like a weird and gossipy thing that I felt was kind of targeted. She added a comment about how she thinks it’s a woman’s job to look after the home and children etc.

I don’t know how to move past this uncomfortable feeling especially as MIL and SIL have asked me to stay with them for a few months post baby for support

My MIL is a textbook mildly no. Well meaning and good hearted, but opinionated, judgemental, and needs control. She’s so far been mostly good to me apart from a few moments that are now in the past.

Recently, she’s been in a bad mood with my husband when he speaks to her on the phone. She said she feels like we live too far; visit too infrequently, and that my husband isn’t around enough to help and support her (dropped visits from every other weekend to once in three to four weekends as she lives 1.5 hours away). My husband also calls her every 2-3 days to check in and see how she’s doing. Anytime she has asked for help, he’s driven home to help, including when I was in my first trimester and feeling very sick. I didn’t mind, as I knew she needed the help more than I needed him for those one or two days.

She also expressed being annoyed that we don’t plan to move back to my husband’s hometown for at least a year. I’m currently pregnant and it seems she expected us to move back immediately and permanently (the plan was to move back one day, and be nearby to support her in old age) My husband’s job is currently tied to where we live. Moving, finding a new job, and doing all that within the next few months would be incredibly stressful and unpredictable and he has told MIL that this is just not an option for us.

For the record, she’s a healthy and fit woman and runs a successful business. She’s always been a single parent and currently lives with SIL who is in her early twenties. So she’s not alone, disabled, or struggling. However, she has occasionally made comments to me like “you guys are just going to put me in a care home”; “children these days don’t look after their parents” and “I’m just going to go away somewhere so I’m not a burden on you both”

I feel nervous about our visits now, and I’m not sure how to respond when my husband says “I had another call with her where she was annoyed; snapped at me; wouldn’t answer my questions properly and wouldn’t tell me what was wrong”

Do other wives just.. let him deal with it? He’s definitely capable of dealing. I just feel helpless and a bit stressed about how she’s being, especially as she expects to help and support me with the baby when I give birth (this is a cultural thing, and my mother is not able to help)