u/TopHuckleberry-3570

I’m young and in highschool bur its a small school and really only have two good friends from there and otherwise i have basically no friends irl i live in georgia and i jst wanna find someone chill i can get to know in person and talk with and sneak out w lmao

I didn’t know what to put as my flair so sorry if it’s not the right context. (TW: SH and suicidal thoughts)

about 3 years ago i got in my first relationship (long distance) i was young and had never had anyone love me like that or me love someone like that. I got overly obsessed and genuinely was just going thru so much with me NEEDING them. the relationship lasted a year and towards the end he started pulling away and being quiet and i started to attention seek and text con trying to get tht love that once was there. I started self harming really badly with the thought that it was something I did that made him like that and continued to reach for more of him. It got to a point where i was extremely depressed and overwhelmed with the lonely feeling and anxiety and i sent a long message ending the relationship. he read it and left it for a few days then replied just saying sorry and there was a lot going on and i had to block him at that point knowing i’d let myself forgive him and go back to obsessing over him. it took me a full year to get over him i would think about him everyday and rethink what i did finally it went from everyday to about twice a week and that’s what im currently stuck at. My main issue and what im asking advice for is i have been dating someone for a few months(with occasional talking stages with people before him) i started to be almost numb with people i liked and i almost feel like i cant love anymore even when i want to iv said to my current bf that i love him but it has almost no feeling behind it when i truly want that feeling with him. i almost feel almost as tho i don’t have feelings anymore when it comes to relationships like this

i just want to know what to do (i haven’t been diagnosed with BPD but i line up with the textbook de and im really trying to understand myself and what i can possibly do)

I didn’t know what to put as my flair so sorry if it’s not the right context. (TW: SH and suicidal thoughts)

about 3 years ago i got in my first relationship (long distance) i was young and had never had anyone love me like that or me love someone like that. I got overly obsessed and genuinely was just going thru so much with me NEEDING them. the relationship lasted a year and towards the end he started pulling away and being quiet and i started to attention seek and text con trying to get tht love that once was there. I started self harming really badly with the thought that it was something I did that made him like that and continued to reach for more of him. It got to a point where i was extremely depressed and overwhelmed with the lonely feeling and anxiety and i sent a long message ending the relationship. he read it and left it for a few days then replied just saying sorry and there was a lot going on and i had to block him at that point knowing i’d let myself forgive him and go back to obsessing over him. it took me a full year to get over him i would think about him everyday and rethink what i did finally it went from everyday to about twice a week and that’s what im currently stuck at. My main issue and what im asking advice for is i have been dating someone for a few months(with occasional talking stages with people before him) i started to be almost numb with people i liked and i almost feel like i cant love anymore even when i want to iv said to my current bf that i love him but it has almost no feeling behind it when i truly want that feeling with him. i almost feel almost as tho i don’t have feelings anymore when it comes to relationships like this

i just want to know what to do (i haven’t been diagnosed with BPD but i line up with the textbook de and im really trying to understand myself and what i can possibly do)

maybe 1 or 2 bcks im broke

all i want is someone around my age but all i get is lil boys texting me