u/dogteethzzz

i’m going through a really hard time right now and i can‘t escape stress. it’s so bad i’m losing my hair in clumps, i have noticeable hair loss at the crown. i can’t sleep at all, i haven’t slept properly in weeks. i’m constantly nauseous and it’s affecting eating, i got weighed a couple days ago and i am now underweight. my sweat changed and it’s really noticeable, deodorant isn’t doing anything. the last time i was stressed out this bad i almost ended in the er. i had severe lapses in memory and forgot how to speak, i couldn’t talk without slurring. it went away after a few days but i am worried it will be that bad again. i don’t know what to do.

i give up if i’m being honest, there’s nothing for me anymore. hurt only person i’ve ever loved. the only reason i kept going cut me off. friends havent reached out to me in three weeks, they don’t know if i’m alive or not. they don’t care. i’m so fucking lonely i can’t keep living like this. i stopped looking after myself six weeks ago. i’m just rotting from the inside out now. i don’t eat anymore. i don’t sleep anymore. i don’t do anything anymore. i give up. this body is nothing to me. it doesn’t matter. i don’t matter. i don’t think i can last another day. i can’t even say i’m sorry, no one cares.

hello all, i have a question regarding getting a diagnosis and what happens afterwards. i have always had issues with eating, though mainly the last six years. i am in the uk and have been referred to a dietitian for a diagnosis i think, i am unsure. i am awaiting the appointment though i wanted to ask if anyone knows what happens afterwards. i am mainly worried will i be monitored or sent away to recover. i don’t fair well being separated from family or friends so this is a main concern for me. if anyone feels comfortable sharing their experience, please let me know. thank you!

i’m going through a really hard time right now and i’m struggling really badly to look after myself. i haven’t showered in 2 weeks, i haven’t washed my hair in 6, i don’t remember when i last brushed my teeth. i don’t have any will to look after myself but all i hear from my family is that i need personal hygiene. i know i need to, i just can’t right now. i can’t face looking at my body, it will make me feel even worse. i don’t know what to do anymore. it’s dragging me down knowing my family refuses to accept that it’s because of my depression. i’m called disgusting and that i’m rotting and it’s just making it worse. i can’t look after myself if i do not want to be here. they know i am struggling to stay alive and yet shame me for something that is not my fault. what can i even do. i can’t keep going on like this.

first time posting here but i hope someone could answer my question.

i am looking to get either a nice cube, jelly squish or a dream drop as they look like it would be a good sensory toy. i have audhd and have been looking for a sensory toy that mainly has a good texture and visual appeal, jelly squish and dream drop are what i’m going for. the craze has made it very difficult to obtain, i’m wondering if anyone has any advice on how to get one without supporting scalpers? i am based in the uk and have seen here that i can get these through smyths, waterstones and menkind though it’s easier said than done. i’d heavily prefer to purchase these in store so i can personally pick what colour and to avoid being disappointed. how often should i be checking these sites and stores? any other tips i should know?

thank you!

stay frosty royal milk tea (7/10) i actually really like this song, added it to my playlist immediately. i don’t particularly mind “are you smelling that shit?”, the censored version sounds a little better but i like both :D

last of the real ones (9/10) one of my favourites to be honest, i was a little sceptical from the intro but it’s really good in my opinion.

HOLD ME TIGHT OR DONT (11/10) i ADORE this song oh my god. the best off this album i beg. i relate to this song heavy and i love how summery it feels. i could listen to it on repeat honestly.

wilson (expensive mistakes) (7/10) i actually like this more than expected, but iffy on “i’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color”. younger me would have loved this song, the rest of the lyrics are perfect in my opinion. solid song.

church (10/10) IF YOU WERE CHURCH I’D GET ON MY KNEES, CONFESS MY LOVE, I‘D KNOW WHERE TO BE MY SANCTUARY, YOU’RE HOLY TO ME, IF YOU WERE CHURCH I’D GET ON MY KNEES

heaven‘s gate (9/10) i must confess i rarely like slow songs, i really like this song. it’s perfection honestly.

champion (7/10) “i’m a champion of the people who don't believe in champions” just sounds really bad to me i don’t know. i’m not fond of the chorus, its a good song its just how “i can do anything” feel underwhelming compared to the rest of the song.

sunshine riptide (9/10) I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH. the summer vibes ugh and the feature is amazing.

young and menace (4/10) i just cannot like this song i’m sorry. the rest of it is amazing it’s just, yeah. why does it stop and start again? it would’ve sounded better if it stopped there at 1:36

bishop’s knife trick (10/10) beautiful song. execution, lyrics, melody, topic, just amazing honestly - it fits as the closer for the album

if i’m being honest i didn’t think i would like this. i really like take this to your grave but i do also really like american beauty / american psycho. heard young and menace and originally pushed the whole album off. i then went “maybe the rest isn‘t so bad” and now i’m buying a mania cd

how would you rank mania songs?

sorry if i sound like i’m seeking attention, i do not mean it in this way. i mean “why arent my closest friends who i speak to daily not talking to me?”

warning for mention of suicide

i won’t be disclosing my age but i am a young person. i only have two people whom i spoke to daily. due to a situation that happened a couple weeks ago, my mental health and plummeted immensely. my friends are aware of what happened, they also know how i am at major risk of taking my life at the moment. i have not been online in two weeks, i have not received any texts. my friends can see when i was last online. if i am at serious risk and i have been offline for over a day they usually text me asking if i’m okay. i know they might not be alright with me venting and that’s okay. it’s just the lack of concern or reaching out which is throwing me off.

i don’t know maybe i am just overreacting

warning for mentions of suicide and self harm

history between us is very long so i’ll try to shorten it. (it’s still gonna be long)

we both have been diagnosed with autism, i have been diagnosed with depression and an anxiety disorder aswell. due to previous trauma i have really bad attachment and abandonment issues. please be respectful when interacting with me. (i am not an adult, i will not be saying ages)

met feb 22 2025 in a groupchat my (no longer) friend added me to. met in person sometime i. march. i fell hard. got together april 1, met his family a days later. went to his a bit, slept over day before his birthday (12) and one more before he ended things (18). a year on and i still don’t really know why. originally it was because i said he was keeping me alive and he felt pressured. i didn’t mean it like that. other reasons i’ve heard from his friends is that he was using me and h just wanted to get rid of the single title but i don’t know. he sucks at communicating. big noticeable problem.

example one. after he broke up with me he “fake dated” the no longer friend to introduced us to (in his exact words) “make you lose feelings“. he was flirting with me and messing with my head. called me while having friend over at midnight to say they’re dating and blocked me. things were really bad, this “friend” was forcing him to cut himself and use his own blood for stuff. parents got involved, it was nasty. us and parents were supposed to meet in person to talk it out, this did not happen.

he had always been on and off with liking me after he broke up with me. he stated multiple times that he wanted to get back with me but he was “scared”. of what? i don’t know, things get worse.

example two. summer comes around, he likes me. i’m away in spain. he likes me. he asked me out with and edited version of ”can we honestly e-date” copypasta. i said i thought he was joking and i needed time to think about it. thought about it, wanted to, told him. “i’m not ready for a relationship rn” he says. we still flirt. day after i am back from holiday he goes away to mexico. we flirt. day before he gets back he starts an argument, blocks me. says he didn’t want to get back with me and he just said that.

example three. august comes around, my birthday on the 17th. he’s flirting with me, randomly drops he has a bf and acts all surprised when i was upset. told me that he was lying about liking me and everything. he was with this person for two week like me (notice a trend?) but was with them for a week before i found out. blocked me and whatever a week before my birthday. i had attempted around 10 times before after and during my birthday. my friends stepped in, spoke to him and agreed he would stay so i wouldn’t take my life. i know it’s bad and i am sorry, he should have just communicated with me from the start. this is a main reason why we don’t talk anymore.

cut contact with me for a “bit” around october. i had a severe mental breakdown (also by external things) which was kind of caused by this. i had to be taken out of school, i am still out of school as of now and i have important exams going on right now. i am not doing these. november i overdosed and went to a&e, early january i had a self harm relaspe. because of this i was put onto more mental health support. he started talking to me again in january “only if we forget everything that happened“ in his words. i decided it’s a new year, new chance and that i’ll trust him.

example four. febuary comes around, week before valentines he drops hints about liking me and wanting to get back together. i do truly believe he had feelings for me at this time. we were eachothers valentines, i was his first non platonic and he was my first ever. he was the first to say ”i love you” after everything. things were good. he made me little trinkets like he did when we were together. we met up a few weeks later and he gave them to me, i still have them. i noticed he started to slip out of liking me a few weeks after valentines. started being dry and blocked me a few times i don’t know why. noticed this after his birthday more. he started posting stuff on his social media relating to self harm and similar topics, i was concerned and asked if he wanted to talk about it. i pushed it a little and he got really mad at me, blocked me. finally cut me off two weeks ago. said that he lied about liking me, lied when he said he loved me and he doesn’t want to date me anymore. “i can’t after everything that’s happened” he said. he left because of his mental health, said i was affecting him. that i make him uncomfortable no matter what i do, even if i don’t do anything. i know i was wrong and did bad things but i believe that if he communicated from the get go things wouldn’t have ended like this. he didn’t say if he’d come back, he didn’t say bye, my mother tells me to wait.

example 5. he still has me added on roblox, i was playing in a private server last night and he joined me. i was terrified so i turned my phone of for 20 minutes. why did he do that.

sorry it is very long. i am still struggling to stay right now, i need him i think. idk. uh yeah

we weren’t together for long, 18 days is definitely the shortest relationship i’ve been in. i’ve only been in 4 relationships, only dated 3 people. i never truly loved anyone but him. i fell. i fell so hard. how can he just walk away like i was nothing. how did he move on if he kept coming back to me. i miss him so much. i love him so much. i don’t care if he keeps hurting me, i can’t live without him. i can’t. i don’t want to. i can‘t. its been 2 weeks since you cut me out forever. i can’t live without you. i won’t live without you. it won’t get better. i won’t get better. we wont. i’ve never needed anyone so bad. bad like oxygen. i need him. i can’t live like this. i never meant to hurt you. you meant to hurt me. “i can’t date you after everything that’s happened” i can. i need to. it’s you. you’re the one. please. i need you. i

i hate this. it hurts.

we barely knew eachother, i miss the pure innocent love we had for eachother. before he broke up with me, before we hurt one another. he said he can’t get back with me after everything, i need him, i would. i hate this. conversations with him that will never happen. dates we will never go on. a wedding that will never happen. how can he just walk away like nothing happened. in my mind he is still the boy who felt like he was missing something when he wasn’t holding my hand. in my mind he still has his short black hair. in my mind he still looked at me with that shine in his beautiful green eyes. i love the color green. i loved when he told me his favourite color was orange. i loved how we would point out when orange and green were together. together like us. i miss his room. i miss his cats. i miss his bed. i miss his family. i miss it all. i just want my love back. my one and only. what did i do wrong. he should have communicated to me. i can’t talk to him anymore. he cut me off. he lied to me. i miss him. i need him. i don’t know anymore. i never wanted to remember him more than i knew him.

i just wanted to be loved.