My mother expects me to sign a legal bond giving her 50% of my future salary even after marriage.
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Today I had a fight with my mom over something that honestly left me really confused.
She told me that she and my dad would get some legal documents made through court saying that both me and my brother would have to give them half of whatever we earn.
I immediately asked, “But why?”
I told her that I also have a life ahead of me. If I get married, I'll have my own family, children, their education, expenses, etc. Why should I be legally obligated to give half of my salary to my parents every month?
She replied, “Your children's father will educate them. You didn't have them alone.”
😭😭😭
I said, “Then he will have parents too, right? Shouldn't he also be responsible for taking care of his own parents?"
I told her that I'm absolutely willing to support my parents. If they genuinely need financial help, I will always help them. They're my parents, after all. But I don't think my entire financial life should be decided in advance, especially after marriage. I'd rather contribute when and how much I realistically can, depending on my own family's needs and my parents' needs.
The thing is, I already work and most of my salary currently goes toward household expenses. Despite that, my parents seem to expect that even after I get married, I should continue financially supporting them.
Whenever I try to explain that after marriage I'll have a separate family too, my mom gets upset and says, “Aaj kal ke bacche aise hi hote hain.”????🥲🥲🥲
I don't understand this mindset. To me, marriage doesn't mean abandoning your parents, but it also doesn't mean that your parents automatically become financially dependent on you for the rest of their lives.
I would happily take care of my parents if they needed me. But I don't think “you must give us 50% of your salary” is the same thing as taking care of your parents.
So, am I being selfish here? Is my mom's expectation reasonable, or am I looking at this completely wrong?