Yesterday I was soooo hopeful that I could finally overcome this. But I made the mistake of asking Reddit for advice. They bullied me and reminded me of how inadequate I was. They told me I should never, ever drive.
Way to break my spirit, my soul...
So for context, I am a 30 year old man who graduated long ago.
In my dream, I had moved from my province of Québec to Alaska to go to college. It was winter time and the college was an ice castle surrounded by a desert of snow. I was at a welcoming party when I realized I forgot my cats in Québec and started panicking. I literally woke up in sweat and saying "Mr. Furball!"
I've been avoiding this for over 15 years. Oh God I'm too scared. What if I fail? What if I'm not good enough?
Les gens de 30 ans et plus, comment faites vous pour continuer? Moi j'ai l'impression d'être pas mal fini.
J'ai pris énormément de poids, je deviens chauve à une vitesse alarmante et j'ai juste aucune énergie.
Mentalement c'est pas la joie. Je suis pas où je devrais être dans ma vie à 30 ans. Tous mes amis qu'il me reste ont tous acheté une maison, se sont mariés, et ont eu des enfants. Moi je suis célibataire endurci, vivant dans un 3 ½ miteux sans isolation. Seul, seul, seul.
Obviously I'm balding, but is it that bad? what should I do? My hairline is also receding btw.
I'm stuck in life. I hate my job and I hate my snall town and I hate being single. I hate being lonely. But I am unable to do anything. I am frozen in fear.
I do graveyard shifts (midnight to 8 am) 1 week out of 3. It is killing me. I noticed that when I'm on those shifts I feel extremely weak, with no energy. I can't even climb the stairs to go to the break room in a single go. I have to take a break cause my legs just give in. It's like my limbs are made of jelly or something. Very weird. Also I get out of breath at every movement.
All I (30 M) want is to be a normal, functionning adult. But my conditions (AvPD, anxiety) make it almost impossible.
I do have a job, but it feels like literal HELL. I just can't have anyone bossing me around. The simplest critique makes me want to give up.
I don't have a girlfriend. I wish I did but I can't even look at a woman in the eyes, let alone talk to her.
I don't have a driver's license cause it makes me too scared to drive and I can't pass the test. I just can't get in there with the examinator watching my every move. This wouldn't be an issue in a big city but I live in a rural area so I need a car. I feel shameful for asking people for rides all the time.
I am so inadequate. It's like I'm stuck at 15 years old eternally. All the friends I used to have are married. Most of them have children in middle school. What do I have? Nothing but regrets.
All I (30 M) want is to be a normal, functionning adult. But my condition makes it almost impossible.
I do have a job, but it feels like literal HELL. I just can't have anyone bossing me around. The simplest critique makes me want to give up.
I don't have a girlfriend. I wish I did but I can't even look at a woman in the eyes, let alone talk to her.
I don't have a driver's license cause it makes me too scared to drive and I can't pass the test. I just can't get in there with the examinator watching my every move. This wouldn't be an issue in a big city but I live in a rural area so I need a car. I feel shameful for asking people for rides all the time.
I am so inadequate. It's like I'm stuck at 15 years old eternally. All the friends I used to have are married. Most of them have children in middle school. What do I have? Nothing but regrets.
I work in a LVL factory. It's awful, I switch between day shifts, afternoon shifts, and graveyard shifts every. single. week. Also the people are super toxic. Like today the boss yelled at me cause I neglected to look at one of the 17 screens I have to watch in permanence for a second.
My job is so toxic, I can't even sleep anymore, even on the week-ends. Too anxious. You're probably thinking "well, just quit", but I live in a small rural town, with no car. Here jobs are rare. Quitting would effectively put me on the sreet. I feel so trapped. I can't endure that.
I made it to 10 days. My own personal record. I feel so dumb to have fallen again
Btw it's hot like HELL today. What a way to ruin an already sucky day
I've been dumb, made the worst choices and now I destroyed myself. This is beyond depressing.
I've been dumb, made the worst choices and now I destroyed myself. This is beyond depressing.
Pour ma part, je dirais sans doute Les misérables de Victor Hugo, Illusions perdues de Balzac, Cyrano de Bergerac d'Edmond Rostand, et bien d'autres encore.
Me semble la courtoisie et la politesse deviennent rare? Et au contraire, les insultes plus fréquentes. En particulier sur les résaux sociaux.
Par example, hier j'ai posé une simple question a propos de la climatisation de mon apart sur r/Quebec. Le monde ont commencé à m'insulter et m'attaquer personellement. J'ai jamais rien dit ou fait de quoi de méchant.
Autre example, ce matin je marchais dans la rue et un automobiliste a failli me frapper. Alors je fais un post anonyme sur le spotted de ma ville, avec des rappels des règles du code de la route. Encore là, des insultes, attaques personnelles et une menace de mort.
Qu'est-ce qui se passe? Pourquoi tant de méchanceté?