u/minnaaaaaaaa

I need opinions from people who have no emotional attachment to this situation because I know I’m not thinking completely objectively.
I met this guy a while ago, and from the beginning he’s been… confusing. He’s very emotionally avoidant and inconsistent. He’ll disappear for days, sometimes longer, then come back like nothing happened. Every time I think I’ve understood him, he does something that completely throws me off again.

The frustrating part is that I genuinely like him. Not because he’s unavailable or because I enjoy chasing people. I admired him as a person. He inspired me during a really difficult phase of my life, and I could genuinely see qualities in him that made me think, “This is someone I’d want to build a life with.”
A few weeks ago, I finally reached my limit. I sent him a long goodbye message telling him I was choosing myself over my feelings because I couldn’t keep living with the uncertainty. I genuinely thought that was the end of it.
Instead, he came back with one of the most emotional conversations we’ve ever had. He told me my messages moved him, that he’d love to be part of my life, that I made him feel safe, that he respected me, and even asked if we could spend a weekend together.

For a second, I thought maybe I’d completely misjudged him.

But then… nothing actually changed.

The next day we were back to talking normally, and now we’re already slipping back into the same pattern. Delayed replies, inconsistency, me wondering what any of it actually means.
I think this is the part that’s messing with my head.

Do people genuinely say these things because they mean them in that moment, but still have no intention of building a relationship? Can someone care about you, admire you, and still not be emotionally available enough to follow through?
Or am I giving way too much weight to one emotional conversation because I wanted it to mean something?

I’m not looking for “he definitely likes you” or “he’s a narcissist.” I don’t think either of those extremes is helpful.
I just want people to read this as objectively as possible.

Does this sound like someone who wants a relationship but struggles to express it? Or someone who likes having me in his life, enjoys the emotional connection, but isn’t actually willing or capable of giving me the kind of relationship I want?

I need opinions from people who have no emotional attachment to this situation because I know I’m not thinking completely objectively.
I met this guy a while ago, and from the beginning he’s been… confusing. He’s very emotionally avoidant and inconsistent. He’ll disappear for days, sometimes longer, then come back like nothing happened. Every time I think I’ve understood him, he does something that completely throws me off again.

The frustrating part is that I genuinely like him. Not because he’s unavailable or because I enjoy chasing people. I admired him as a person. He inspired me during a really difficult phase of my life, and I could genuinely see qualities in him that made me think, “This is someone I’d want to build a life with.”

A few weeks ago, I finally reached my limit. I sent him a long goodbye message telling him I was choosing myself over my feelings because I couldn’t keep living with the uncertainty. I genuinely thought that was the end of it.
Instead, he came back with one of the most emotional conversations we’ve ever had. He told me my messages moved him, that he’d love to be part of my life, that I made him feel safe, that he respected me, and even asked if we could spend a weekend together.

For a second, I thought maybe I’d completely misjudged him.
But then… nothing actually changed.
The next day we were back to talking normally, and now we’re already slipping back into the same pattern. Delayed replies, inconsistency, me wondering what any of it actually means.
I think this is the part that’s messing with my head.
Do people genuinely say these things because they mean them *in that moment*, but still have no intention of building a relationship? Can someone care about you, admire you, and still not be emotionally available enough to follow through?
Or am I giving way too much weight to one emotional conversation because I wanted it to mean something?

I’m not looking for “he definitely likes you” or “he’s a narcissist.” I don’t think either of those extremes is helpful.
I just want people to read this as objectively as possible.

Does this sound like someone who wants a relationship but struggles to express it? Or someone who likes having me in his life, enjoys the emotional connection, but isn’t actually willing or capable of giving me the kind of relationship I want?

I need opinions from people who have no emotional attachment to this situation because I know I’m not thinking completely objectively.
I met this guy a while ago, and from the beginning he’s been… confusing. He’s very emotionally avoidant and inconsistent. He’ll disappear for days, sometimes longer, then come back like nothing happened. Every time I think I’ve understood him, he does something that completely throws me off again.

The frustrating part is that I genuinely like him. Not because he’s unavailable or because I enjoy chasing people. I admired him as a person. He inspired me during a really difficult phase of my life, and I could genuinely see qualities in him that made me think, “This is someone I’d want to build a life with.”

A few weeks ago, I finally reached my limit. I sent him a long goodbye message telling him I was choosing myself over my feelings because I couldn’t keep living with the uncertainty. I genuinely thought that was the end of it.
Instead, he came back with one of the most emotional conversations we’ve ever had. He told me my messages moved him, that he’d love to be part of my life, that I made him feel safe, that he respected me, and even asked if we could spend a weekend together.

For a second, I thought maybe I’d completely misjudged him.
But then… nothing actually changed.
The next day we were back to talking normally, and now we’re already slipping back into the same pattern. Delayed replies, inconsistency, me wondering what any of it actually means.
I think this is the part that’s messing with my head.
Do people genuinely say these things because they mean them *in that moment*, but still have no intention of building a relationship? Can someone care about you, admire you, and still not be emotionally available enough to follow through?
Or am I giving way too much weight to one emotional conversation because I wanted it to mean something?

I’m not looking for “he definitely likes you” or “he’s a narcissist.” I don’t think either of those extremes is helpful.
I just want people to read this as objectively as possible.

Does this sound like someone who wants a relationship but struggles to express it? Or someone who likes having me in his life, enjoys the emotional connection, but isn’t actually willing or capable of giving me the kind of relationship I want?

Hi everyone,

I’m interested in applying for a **PhD in Neuroscience at ETH Zurich**, but before that I’d love to do a **short research internship** to see if the lab and research environment are a good fit.

A bit about me:
\-Recently completed an **MSc in Drug Design at UCL**.

\-Background in **immunology, molecular biology, bioinformatics, and drug discovery**.

\-My research interests are in **neuroimmunology**, particularly understanding **neuroinflammation** and applying **pharmacokinetics and drug design** to develop therapies for neurological diseases.

I had a few questions:

1.Is it common to secure research internships by emailing professors directly?

2.Are there any labs or PIs at ETH working in **neuroimmunology, neuroinflammation, or neuropharmacology** that you’d recommend?

3.Does doing an internship improve your chances of later joining the same lab for a PhD?

4.Any general advice for someone applying to the ETH Neuroscience PhD programme?

I’d really appreciate any insights or experiences. Thanks!

Hi everyone,

I’m interested in applying for a PhD in Neuroscience at ETH Zurich, but before that I’d love to do a short research internship to see if the lab and research environment are a good fit.

A bit about me:
-Recently completed an MSc in Drug Design at UCL.

-Background in immunology, molecular biology, bioinformatics, and drug discovery.

-My research interests are in neuroimmunology, particularly understanding neuroinflammation and applying pharmacokinetics and drug design to develop therapies for neurological diseases.

I had a few questions:

1.Is it common to secure research internships by emailing professors directly?

2.Are there any labs or PIs at ETH working in neuroimmunology, neuroinflammation, or neuropharmacology that you’d recommend?

3.Does doing an internship improve your chances of later joining the same lab for a PhD?

4.Any general advice for someone applying to the ETH Neuroscience PhD programme?

I’d really appreciate any insights or experiences. Thanks!

Hi everyone!

I’m looking for a single occupancy room in a pre-occupied 2/3BHK with female flatmates for around 2 months (August/September).

Preferred locations:
Baner
Balewadi
Pashan
Nearby areas

Tenancy period: July mid/ August to September

Furnished flat would be ideal.

If you have a room available or know of any leads, please DM me. No brokerage, please.

Hi everyone!

I’m looking for a single occupancy room in a pre-occupied 2/3BHK with female flatmates for around 2 months (August/September).

Preferred locations:
Baner
Balewadi
Pashan
Nearby areas

Tenancy period: July mid/ August to September

Furnished flat would be ideal.

If you have a room available or know of any leads, please DM me. No brokerage, please.

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting lately, and I think I’m finally realizing how much having an emotionally unavailable parent has affected me.

For the longest time, I focused on my romantic relationships and wondered why I kept ending up attached to emotionally unavailable people or why I struggled so much with abandonment. It wasn’t until recently that I started connecting it back to my childhood. When I was going through some of the darkest periods of my life, dealing with depression and anxiety at 19, I think what I needed most wasn’t advice, money, or someone to fix my problem , I just wanted a parent to show up emotionally.

Looking back, I think that absence has shaped me more than I ever realized.

I’m trying really hard not to stay stuck in that narrative or make it my entire identity, but I also don’t want to dismiss the impact it had. I can see how much validation I looked for in other people and how often I confused emotional warmth with feeling genuinely safe and secure. I’m working on changing those patterns now, but it’s definitely a process.

I guess I’m just curious about other people’s experiences. If you grew up with an emotionally unavailable parent, how has it affected you as an adult? Did it show up in your relationships, your friendships, or your sense of self? Have you found ways to heal from it? And if you’ve forgiven your parent or chosen not to what did that process look like for you?

I recently saw the support and enthusiasm around the Cockroach Janta Party protest in Pune, and it made me wonder about something.

The energy behind the movement is undeniable, and it’s clear that a lot of people, especially young people, feel strongly about the paper leak issue and the students who suffered because of it. Accountability is important, and I understand why people are angry.

But what I’m struggling to understand is what the end goal is.If the Education Minister resigns tomorrow, then what? Does that fix the system? Does it prevent future leaks? Does it help students who are struggling right now? Does it do anything for the families who lost their children?

I’m not here to criticise the movement but it also makes me wonder about things like what practical measures is CJP advocating for beyond accountability? Are there specific reforms around exam security, transparency, student mental health, support for affected
students, or oversight of examination bodies?

Maybe these discussions are already happening and I just haven’t come across them. But from the outside, it feels like the resignation demand gets far more attention than the solutions.

I’d genuinely like to hear from people who support or follow the movement closely. What does success look like beyond getting one minister removed?

It feels like I’ve met so many men who are happy to talk about possibilities but never actually do anything. They’ll talk about spending time together, future plans, trips, weekends away, how much they like you, how attracted they are to you, how special you are. They’ll paint this whole picture in your head.

And then nothing happens.

Not because they’re not interested. Not because they’re busy. Just because there always seems to be some invisible wall there.

At this point, I feel like I’ve spent years dealing with men who want the idea of intimacy more than actual intimacy. They want connection, attention, sex, comfort, validation, someone to talk to but when it comes to showing up consistently or being emotionally available, suddenly everything becomes complicated.

Maybe I’m being cynical, but I swear half the dating pool seems to be in therapy-speak self-awareness mode where they can perfectly explain why they’re avoidant while continuing to be avoidant.

What’s weird is that I’m not even particularly invested anymore. I don’t get excited when someone makes plans because I’ve learned that plans and reality are often two completely different things. I find myself just nodding along thinking, “Sure, we’ll see.”

So I’m genuinely curious: has anyone else noticed this? Are there actually more emotionally unavailable men now, or have I somehow been stuck attracting the same person in different bodies for years?

There’s 6 of us and we’re planning something in July/August. Budget is roughly 40k INR per person, flying from Mumbai. We’re open to pretty much anywhere, India or international.

Originally we were set on Sri Lanka because it looked cheap, but then I started looking into the weather and now I’m not sure if it’s the best idea that time of year.

We’re basically looking for somewhere with good views( preferably someplace tropical), good food, things to do during the day, maybe some nightlife, and preferably not constant rain lol.

If you were in our position, where would you go?

Would be really helpful if you’ve actually been there around July/August and can comment on the weather and how much you ended up spending.

Looking for places in Pune that serve really good authentic chicken katsu curry. Bonus if the place also has a nice vibe/aesthetic.

Would appreciate recommendations :)