u/moooonstaaar

Which bar is friendly for women to party? We are a group of 3. Thank you!

Hello! Would like to let out what I’m feeling through words kasi parang sasabog na talaga siya (as a hindi pala share sa mga kaibigan). My ex partner and I dated for 2 months and together for almost 5 months. When we dated, we did not have any issues. Nung naging kami na, dun na nag start mga problema. It was problems after problems. Once a month, may major misunderstanding. Syempre hindi ako magmamalinis na sabihing hindi ko kasalanan. Yung ibang problems namin, may lapses rin naman ako. Etong last was the last straw.

It’s been months since I knew about their gawain na magpanggap na parang single sa reddit. I accidentally discovered their account around March pero I did not tell them baka they’ll accuse me na pinapakialaman ko personal space nila. The reddit comment wast about them being happy na 3 months single na raw. Another comment was about them liking single life kasi may freedom. Another was a post ata yun stating na nag breakdown daw siya seeing their ex-fiance na happy na with someone? Di ko na maalala basta about their ex-f yun. And, di ko pa rin siya cinonfront about that. Kasi tangina I am blinded by my love for them.

Just recently (maybe 2 weeks ago), nag comment siya sa iyang sub dito about the qualities sa ex-fiancé na gusyo niya. They even said na they sometimes look at their ex-f’s socmed to see how they were doing? Wtf! Tama ba yon? They explained sabi they did that before pa naging kami. Isang malaking bullshit.

I asked for a break up kasi hindi ko na kaya na paulit ulit na akong ginagago. Paulit ulit ko nalang nararamdaman na backburner lang ako. Kung hihingi naman ako ng assurance, hindi maibigay kasi gusto raw mag focus sa present at hindi sa future. Agad ko binawi ang pag hingi ng breakup kasi na realize ko na bigyan ko pa ulit ng chance, pero siya ang may ayaw na. Pagod na raw siya mag deal sa mga away namin. And I thought no na naiintindihan ko naman pero siya pa may audacity na sabihin sakin yun.

It ended so messy na very vivid pa sa utak ko how they shouted “you are so fucking selfish. Di porket only child ka, makukuha mo na lahat ng gusto mo” at my face. Selfish daw ako kasi ayaw ko siyang bitawan kahit ayaw na niya. Never ako sinigawan ng ganon ng mga magulang ko. Hindi rin ako palasigaw sakin kanya. Siya pa nakapagsigaw sakin ng ganon ka intense. Salamat sa trauma.

All I did in our relationship was my best, hindi pa rin pala enough.

To my ex partner, kung mababasa mo to,

What I wanted from you was a sincere apology lang sa pang gago for months pero kahit yan, hindi ko pala makukuha from you. What happened was very traumatic. For 8 years, I’ve been trying to build up my self-esteem again, ikaw lang pala magpapafeel sakin ulit na maliit lang ako—that I am not enough.

Maraming salamat sa limang buwan.