r/isfp

Genuinely curious how each type defines loyalty and how important (or not) it is to you. Will be going around the subs, hope to observe some patterns :)

Okay, if you have time, would you be willing to offer some insight into how an ISFP man might show that he is interested in someone? Below are the main points and why I am struggling to decipher his behavior. I know personality type cannot provide a definitive answer, but I would appreciate an ISFP perspective.

• I worked with an ISFP man at a company where personal or romantic relationships between us were professionally prohibited.

• He was always very encouraging and would text me asking to meet before meetings so we could talk. However, he did not share much about himself.

• Sometimes he would text me at night, still in a professional manner, to explain something he had said or apologize for it. I always kept the conversation professional because I did not know how to change the subject. His messages sounded professional, but I was never sure why he cared so much about making sure I understood him.

• We had a workplace recognition platform where coworkers could award points to recognize someone for going above and beyond. He arranged special approval for me to receive a substantial financial reward. I did not see him do anything comparable for anyone else.

• Several months after I quit, he found me on social media and followed my public account. I sent him a request to follow his account in return, but my request remained pending.

• He has never liked anything I have posted or messaged me through the platform.

• I later found a different public social media account belonging to him and followed it. He did not remove me. On that account, I see a much more unfiltered and intense side of him. It feels like I can see his internal emotions through what he writes, and honestly, it makes me feel even more drawn to him. He only has about ten followers, so my presence is probably noticeable. He follows around a thousand people, though, most of whom appear to be celebrities. I admit I did not exactly conduct a deep investigation. Lol.

• After leaving my request pending for four months, he denied it on the original platform, even though he still follows my public account there. I messagd to inquire noticing the follow mismatch and asked to follow him in return. He read my message immediately. He did not respond - but maybe I made him feel awkward? 

• About ten months later, after overthinking everything, I sent him a text saying that he did not need to respond, but that I missed him and his humor. He reacted with a heart emoji but did not reply. I cannot tell whether he remained silent because I specifically told him he did not need to respond, or because he is not interested in me that way. Is reacting with a heart but not replying a typical ISFP response?

• At work, I sometimes felt that he was protective of me or my feelings. Once, he defended me during a meeting. There was no confrontation, though. It was only a suggestion from another teammate, so I did not understand why he felt the need to step in.

• I felt a connection with him. He could get me out of my head and make me feel completely present. I also felt no need to perform around him. I could simply be myself. He made me feel very safe, possibly for the first time in my life. I cannot fully explain it, but knowing him had a huge impact on me personally.

• Now that it feels so emotionally significant, I feel almost paralyzed. I am unsure what to do because acknowledging how much he affected me has left me feeling very vulnerable. I most definitely do not have the courage to reach out again.

What I want to know is whether you think it is possible that he is interested in me. Do you think he will ever reach out? My heart feels heavy, and I care deeply for him.

So I am trying to figure out Fi. I think it's very hard for me to figure out and more often than not I just dismiss it or mis-judge it.

So how does it even look like in thoughts? I mean...when you see the world mostly with Fi how does it feel like to **you**? If its very natural in your thought process then do you feel like its something that is a judging function?

What I mean by "if it's a judging function or not" is that to me...judging functions are functions through which you make the final decision about anything. Even though you may take intuition and sensation into consideration. The final decision always is in either thinking or feelings hand.

So if we are taking feeling and thinking as same judging functions. Do you think you actively pause in every moment to think,here by thinking I mean actual reasoning of a rational function and actively working the situation out in thoughts.

So is it "Okay this is my value or this is something that will emotionally affect me and what I care about so I will take a decision keeping that in mind as the first priority" (at least something like that) or is it not like that and its something like an immediate spontaneous emotion you feel about something which is related to your values and its so fast that you never pause in the moment even if you do afterwards.(I am not saying emotion is Fi but you understand Fi through emotions right?)

In the moment of making decisions you kind of just know which one is the "right" one to you and you make the decision.

Or...is it a mixture of both examples given above? Please think if it's just thinking or if its feeling. I mean if its both then there could be a possibility that you are mistaking thinking as feeling as both can give emotions as a result to the person.

It would really help if you would tell me what Fi is to you and how it's like in your thoughts with real life examples.

I don't like dismissing it as it's bad for me and other people around me.

Estoy seguro de que tengo Fi-Te, con Fi dominante y Te más bajo, pero no sé si tengo Se-Ni o Ne-Si en medio de las otras funciones.

Ya hice los tests, pero siempre varía entre INFP, ESFP o ISFP.

Y como no entiendo el concepto de Si y Ni, me enredo más cuando intento “chocar” conmigo así que comentaré un poquito sobre mí para que me den su opinión y puedan aclararme la mente.

Soy un chico de principios de los veinte, soy muy sentimental y tengo un sentido fuerte de valores como la honestidad, eso es lo que pienso que me caracteriza en persona; por eso mi familia siempre me manda al mercado porque yo regreso el excedente de dinero hahaha.

No soy muy organizado ni eficiente, pero sé hacer las cosas como me han enseñado. No busco formas de hacer todo más fácil, sino hacer lo que ya sé.

Cuando estoy estresado me pongo en un modo muy crítico y pasivo-agresivo; sé cómo usar las emociones para saber dónde atacar. Por ejemplo, mi abuela tiene un hijo favorito que es su hijo, pero dice que no, y siempre le recuerdo eso cuando trata mejor a él que a sus otros hijos. No estoy orgulloso de eso y me siento mal por hacerlo.

Me gusta irme a soñar despierto, casi siempre estoy pensando en aventuras en mi cabeza donde yo soy el protagonista, o un villano, o simplemente imaginando que soy un caracol (nada lejos de la realidad porque hago las cosas a mi propio ritmo), pero bueno, no es como que me llene la cabeza de sueños; prefiero ir desarrollando la historia en mi mente de a una, en vez de tener un mar de posibilidades.

Empiezo muchos hobbies fácil aunque me aburro rápido; ya he sido escritor, youtuber, pintor, escultor, pero nada profesional, solo un principiante.

No me gusta reducir a la gente por su capacidad de hacer cosas, por el pasado que tienen, o por cómo se comportan. Cada quien es como es y no deberían limitarse a vivir.

Me encanta salir a caminar, la naturaleza. No me gustan las fiestas, aunque prefiero reuniones chiquitas si es con familia o amigos cercanos.

Creo que una de mis mejores ventajas es que sé adaptarme fácil a las personalidades de los demás, a cómo interactúan y trabajan. Incluso cuando la gente es nefastía y me agarra como su costal de golpes emocional, aguanto porque sé que ellos también tienen sus propias luchas.

No pienso mucho en el futuro ni en el pasado; vivo mi día a día como me siento, aunque lo mantengo: si un animal está herido lo ayudo; si mi amigo me necesita, estoy ahí; si mi familia está molesta conmigo, los dejo desahogarse.

Bueno, creo que escribí un montón; perdón por el texto largo y perdón si algo no se entiende. Usé un traductor porque no hablo inglés.

ISFP guy works front desk at a NYSC gym in my neighborhood. He is 20, is a college student. is creative, studies film in college, has tattoos on his arm, and seems a little alternative. He does run clubs so he is able to be around people who are very extroverted.

I saw him once at the gym and just gave him big smile. I hadn't seen him before and IDK my face just reacted before my brain could stop me. I'm an INFJ btw. I didn't think anything of it, i just thought he was so cute. He smiled back immediately while i was leaving the gym.

Since then he has gone out of his way to always greet me when i walk into the gym, give me a big smile and when I'm leaving he always says goodnight. We see each other only on Friday nights because I don't see him the other days I go in.

We have been doing this for 3 months. I once didn't go into the gym for the 3 Fridays in a row so didn't see him for 3 weeks and when I finally came in on a Friday, his face lit up when he saw me. But he has never tried to extend the interaction... no questions, no comments, nothing. I always smile back and greet him.

I thought maybe he was sending greenlights and wanted me to show more initiative so I finally got the courage and one night asked him "I see you around but I don't know your name". I had just walked in and he immediately smiled warmly and recognized me. But as soon as I asked him his name, smile went away and he said "What?" I asked again "what is your name?" and he answered veyr flatly without a smile "oh.. Sean". I nodded and waited a sec to see if he would ask me for my name or say anything else but he didn't. I felt so stupid and awkward and nodded and walked away.

IS he attracted but just not interested in talking or moving this to another level? Btw he doesn't smile or light up for other customers when I see him with others. He seems fairly introverted in the gym but professional/attentive. He doesn't say hi to other customers.

I'm not sure why he was smiling, lighting up, and always making sure to greet me in and out of the gym for 3 months?

Can anyone tell me what an ISFP with this kind of background was thinking/feeling?

With Ni I think works with my Fi, basically what I do a LOT is think of or imagine myself in a future scenario becoming something great or the utmost most prefect and ideal reality with any factor I get get improved by, such as if I start playing a new sport, I want to master it or he’s the best in it in the world, in like a mental image that’s is super detailed and I imagine myself there.
I then if I’m healthy or optimistic, actually build my way towards it, and work on everything I need to get there.

Currently I have my identify figured out, I know what I like and don’t, tbh I sometimes still try to figure that out especially if I am SURE of liking X or Y and I see a new thing, I may like more I have to rethink it. But I want to achieve that goal and it’s all I think about and direct all my energy towards, and tbh, get impatient to not getting there on time, or well ignore everything else.

But when healthy I have no goals, I just spend my time dreaming of that goal, and doing nothing, and just thinking of that ideal future goal, and adjusting it or “seeing” it tbh.

I used to have many goals, I wanted to be an inventor and engineer and tbh I wanted to have every career that exists, but I liked inventing things and optimizing thing s to make life more convenient and efficient.

I think I am quite socially anxious, mostly because I don’t want to do anything inappropriate and get in trouble and face punishment tbh, I hate pain, I really HATE pain, that’s why I’m terrified of Hell, and follow my religion because of it.

But I am like ALWAYS thinking about aesthetics, but not good at them that much but I can dress someone else up good but in myself I don’t really know, but I want to be pretty and hot and super beautiful, physically, and I know it superficial but I THINK about it but irl, I look homeless… which is why I get MORE anxious because it’s not how I want to appear as.

I am energy wise very low, like I have a low physical battery but mentally not, I can think a lot, tbh there isn’t a moment where I’m not thinking, I’m trying to learn to relax or just be, but it’s so hard I constantly feel like I’m low on time, I do things like I’m running out of time so much and so scared of losing time, for no reason it’s just a feeling.

I don’t engage with Se that often but it’s kinda fun but I wanna achieve something tbh when I do it, like I can’t do a hobby without imagining a whole career in it, but usually I can’t just choose a carrier because you need to have one career chosen from an early age or the ones I like have requirements I don’t fit and just Know I will fail if I try, or it won’t be what I want.

Tbh i want a goal for my own amusement or well, I guess I want to invent things that make life easier for people, but that’s about it, I really focus on myself and my own interests, I don’t do anything unless it benefits me, and because I’m so low on energy I don’t do anything unless it’s crucial, but tbh my goal I had I made two after each other, I failed both times, really bad like reality smacked me, I screamed and cried and self hated because my plans were ruined my progression, by things I had no control over. But now I gave up on everything and found a career but as a filler to survive my life, because I’m religious, I just wait for paradise because I can be anything I want, anyways, so that’s my new goal it’s ALL I think about, it’s the ONLY thing I care about.

I also get really insecure about how I look, because I want to appear professional and proper and beautiful, but sometimes I can’t because I have too high standard for that or those things go against what my religion say to dress like which I don’t mind, but then there is that societal standards which I don’t meet which makes it hard for me to impress people.

I do have swings of very intense and hedonistic activities where I do grotesque and extreme things or something intense and set up things for it, but it happens like every 2 weeks or so, and after I go to zero interest in it, like it’s very extreme swings like from eating nothing, at ALL for days, to overeating once until I almost vomit, but being normal with things like that is so hard, and stressful.

But that’s all I’m only sharing this to help get typed..I want to understand myself through a system and then accommodate things to make sure I can optimize myself and know how to interact with different people in optimal ways.

I’m torn between INFP, ISFP, and INFJ. Like, I don’t like fantasy like an INFP; I’m very soft and empathetic, yes, but I’m not a perfectionist at all like an INFJ. At the same time, I’d rather let others do all the manual work; I just love a great atmosphere and a good vibe. I understand other people’s psychology and really love eating delicious food, dressing comfortably, and traveling.

Hey everyone! I'm currently doing a research proposal about personality theory and would love to hear from the people in this community. What is it like being your personality type? It can range from your work/school life balance, romantic life, everyday decision making, and maybe something nobody really thinks about when it comes to your type that you may know. Anything is both helpful and interesting to me so don't be shy! :)

What makes you feel safe enough to show someone the parts of yourself that you normally keep private?

And once you trust someone, do you naturally become more verbally expressive, or do you still prefer showing people how you feel rather than explaining it?

Idk.. what do you recommend and why?

He just wanted to ask. Do u isfps like become very chirpy, goofy or open in front of ur closest friends. Or is ur actual persona one thats very quiet and doesnt feel the need to talk while sittingnext to the close person all the time. Like u cud care deeply for the person and ask personal questions bht interactions are mostly teasing or libertious comment making in the second case. The first case is basically talking a lot abt opinions on current things inthe world, discussions etc.

Because I'm sick of this overpriced world where it feels like everyone hates each other's guts.

Also, I have a gut feeling many of Gen Z's heroes will be Fi-doms.

No obvious fantasy stuff like magic, please.

So whenever you guys are faced with a situation where u hv to ‘take a side,’ how often would u just say neither or both or accepting both sides? Like ik this really depends on what it is like if it’s something linked to morality. Or if ur friends are having an argument how would u take someone’s side, as in would you judge based on who’s wrong or right? Do u take time to understand both sides or what if u dont agree with either one?

How often would u stay neutral in times like that?

Idk if u get what im asking but yah

Let me explain. Looking at the PDB character database, I get the impression that for a lot of INFJs, people’s comments suggest they’re seen as more ISFP, and vice versa – and I haven’t noticed this to the same extent with other types... They aren’t necessarily the best-known characters, but they’re the first ones that spring to mind. In MLB, Luka Coufaine and Zoé Lee are often described as INFJ, but apparently lots of people consider them to be ISFP. >!The same goes for Jean Grey recently, who in the comics and the Fox films has always been INFJ, but in the Sony films !<seems more like an ISFP according to people on PDB… Because they’re FI SE NI TE, whereas INFJs are NI FE TI SE… so they only share two functions.

Thanks in advance. And sorry for the clumsy message – it’s not my first language.

The older I get, the less appealing it seems…I personally fall under the “indifferent” category.

Don’t get me wrong, I have a very loving partner and I’m 100% committed to my relationship. I just don’t care for the paperwork and feel like you can have a loving, committed relationship without the paper. Or maybe I really am afraid of commitment deep down inside?

Anyways, curious about what other ISFPs think and thanks for voting!

View Poll

I mean, Idk.. At first, I thought I was an INFP at first because I did like writing and whatnot..(Oh yea, I sucked ass and never truly understood what made a character so charming.. it never clicked sadly 🫤)

But I feel like this deep intuition developed when I started writing, and my OCD always tells me "I changed types" when in reality idk if that's the case or not.

I became more abstract with my ideas over time, yet these ideas never felt true to who I was and when I accepted being an ISFP (to shut my OCD the fuck up) I felt nostalgia, like i was 17 all over again. So is it true? Can an ISFP develop INFP like intuition assuming they spend years studying their charm and whatnot? (Sorry if this post seems kinda dumb )

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