r/siblingsupport

So I get in trouble a lot I’m not a very “you hit me I’m gonna tell the teacher person” I’m more of a “you hit me I beat your ass”person. My entire life I haven’t ever been a golden child but neither has my brother. So recently my brother has had a fixation on stadiums. Typically this wouldn’t be a problem but he wants to go to games every weekend and cry’s when he doesn’t. Still fine but he came up to me recently with an incomplete purchase expecting me to fix it. What happened was he tried to purchase tickets to a game at MSG mind you we live in Washington DC. He didn’t add a card number so the purchase didn’t go through but this isn’t the first time he has done this he made a purchase on my dads phone for 100 dollar seats but my dad was able to cancel it. And I told my mom she was like well he doesn’t understand what a purchase is and he doesn’t understand what this stuff means. Me and my brother hate how unfair it is first of all he just comes home and watches tv homework since he is autistic is optional while I have hours of homework a night. Also my entire life everyone except for my grandparents who actually see me don’t care about me it’s just wow my brother got a fourth grade reading level wow mines when I was in sixth grade was a 10th grade reading level I got a good job. My brother is also such a bitch to me but my parents are like he is in a bad mood. Well he shouldn’t be treating me like shit everyday considering he just comes home and does nothing. Just sits in front of the tv like a fucking potato. I used to be in a worse mental state where I was normally staying in my room all day because I was never seen by anybody in my family I was just the one who was useful every now and then just another mouth to feed nothing special about me. I’ve matured and realized now that my friends at school are my people and that my kids won’t be meeting their uncle. My younger brother is really cool though. This was a complete rant and you can feel free to criticize but this is my opinion and you can have yours. My entire life I have been the older brother but also the punching bag. Sometimes my brother will get actually angry and try to legit hurt you he once started attacking me because I started petting a cat he believed belonged to him even though it was someone else’s cat. I started hitting him back and I got in trouble. Also a different time he was calling me stupid so I said it back and I told him to stop chewing with his mouth open and I got grounded because I said that’s not fair I was grounded for 2 months. My life is not fair will never be fair and I wish it was just me all the time. Unfortunately I was cursed and I hate my life for that. So fuck my brother and my life. At least I have friends but I don’t have people who actually understand my struggle and I need that. Thanks Reddit.

I forgot my old login for my account so I’m posting this on a fresh account cus I’ve been completely stumped. i feel like the only one that monitors what my 7 year old autistic sister plays on her tablet because I started noticing how she repeats adverts telling her to download kids games “for free”. These ‘free games’ only have one small feature she can play and then the rest of it is either locked behind subscriptions or a one time purchase for an ad-free version of the game. I’ve noticed that practically ALL the damn games on her iPad she downloads are these kinds of games and my mom does not pay attention to this as she has even attempted to purchase micro transactions before. There are parental locks on her iPad now so it just doesn’t automatically approve it but it annoys me to see her trying to play any game on her iPad and seeing all these locked features that keep convincing her to try to pay because then she just Downloads even MORE useless games that have nothing to offer her unless we pay to unlock the rest of it.

I also just don’t like the habit it’s starting to become to go into the App Store of devices she has access to in the house to download more random shit so now she starts alternating between screens with no regulation. Or sometimes using two screens at once. And my mom is just becoming increasingly more unaware of how much she does this. I don’t know if it’s that big of a deal but I’m not trying to treat her differently from a neurotypical child because she is very smart but I just don’t want her to fry her own attention span when she already has trouble focusing

I’m planning on cleaning out most of the games on her iPad and replacing them with games that actually engage and encourage her to learn without bombarding her with a bunch of crap but I could use some suggestions if any that at least do not contain in-app purchases. I’ve heard Apple Arcade is a good choice but I’d also like suggestions that engage her to read and use her critical thinking skills. She also likes to colour and draw a lot so any free apps like that would be nice as well.

Thank you in advance :)

My husband and I have been struggling to figure out how to help my brother-in-law (27M). He’s very high functioning, but has very low self-confidence. He’s been at a local college for ~8 years now and still lives with his parents. He’s never had a job and sleeps most of the days (only awake from 10pm-6am most nights). He recently quit enrolling into classes and never got his degree.

We think he’s struggling with depression and self-esteem issues. He’s very smart and capable, but he doesn’t see that in himself (my husband and I think his parents haven’t really pushed him to do much, baby him, and let his diagnosis define him).

We aren’t really sure what to do. We’ve been actively trying to spend more time with him the past few years since the only place he likes to visit (other than his own home) is our house. He’s coming over this weekend, and we are trying to decide if/how to address our concerns.

He’s always said he wants to get married and have kids, but we’re scared that he won’t find that on the path he’s currently on. Partly because he doesn’t have any opportunities to meet people with his current lifestyle.

We want to encourage him to get a job, find something he enjoys, or maybe even get back in school, but we don’t want to be pushy or make him feel bad. Again, he’s extremely high functioning and smart. We want to help, but we don’t want to overstep or unintentionally make things worse. The main goal would be to help him raise his confidence and make sure he knows that we believe in him.

Any advice or thoughts?

Edit; We’ve also been talking about encouraging him to see a therapist or mental health professional as a first step

i’m (f16) and i’m so tired of living with my autistic brother (f13). i don’t hate him, but it’s a little less than love. my brother will never be able to speak, use the bathroom by himself, cook his own meals etc. he is severely autistic and low functioning. he destroys everything. my house has many holes in the walls that were caused by him. he throws things around. he has huge tantrums that can last for hours. i understand he’s suffering, but i am too. im embarrassed of him, i don’t tell friends about him, so im never allowed to have people over.
i’m scared he will get violent towards the rest of my family as he gets older. there is little hope for my brother, i’ve read that autistics who don’t speak aftera certain age most likely never will. i think he needs to be put into a home for this type of stuff where they have “better ways to handle him” but i know my parents are terrified of him being abused. he wouldn’t be able to verbalize it, and that IS terrifying. i don’t think they expect me to take on the role of caretaker for him, but i really don’t know what they’ll do when they pass on (they’re old- almost 60).
i’m just so drained living here. i’m writing this at 3 am because my brother decided to wake everyone up by banging his head on the damn wall. i’m also scared of having an autistic child. i wouldn’t say that my brother has traumatized me but he definitely did not give me or others in my house a good experience with autism.