r/simpleliving

On one hand, living in the moment and just holding onto the memory feels so pure and beautiful. But on the other hand, having physical records lets you revisit that exact aesthetic years later. Which side are you guys on? Is it better to just let it fade naturally, or document everything?

Does anyone else notice that they have the urge/impulse to spend/buy stuff during their fertile window? Or am I just the only freak? Hahaha

I started noticing recently since I logged my cycle on the health app. For me, it’s jewelry, perfumes, and cute handbags (usually from TJmaxx or kohls). Thankfully, I don’t live in a bigger city that has nicer stores.

The thing is, it’s not like all the stuff I buy I don’t like, they’re nice and I do like them, I even keep some of it, but then I end up returning most.

I’ve noticed my bored/general impulse spending and I do have control of it and or notice when I’m doing it. But as usual once you solve/start to correct one habit, you start noticing all the other ones.

I have a lot of stickers, craft supplies, and things of that sort. I don’t like using them because.. well then they’ll be gone.

I am trying to be better about this!

I have a fear of being without. I am trying to overcome it. I did not grow up in poverty, but my husband says I have a scarcity mindset as if I did.

I am always eager to complete tasks so my future self will have less responsibility. Do the dishes now, take the trash out now, lay out clothes for tomorrow, etc.

I have a hard time resting.

How do you manage this?

I remember when I first started reading seriously, I always had this temptation to share the quotes I was liking. At some point, I'd almost start to wonder: Am I reading this for me, or for the audience in my head?

It's an easy trap to fall into. Why not share good insights with others? Discuss them, maybe they learn something too. It's understandable, even generous. But somewhere along the way, you don't want to forget about yourself and start living just for others.

Hey, fellow humans are cool! I'm not promoting self indulgence, but these days and in this world we live in, it's clear that we've never been this distant from ourselves. And you can't really take care of others if you don't take care of yourself.

You see this a lot in parents (and people in helping professions, too). They read endlessly about how to raise kids, how to be better for them. But somewhere in all that, they forget to read for themselves.

Just think about it... when was the last time you picked a book just for you?

A nice person once gave me this advice: Keep a "secret" book for yourself. One that no one knows about. Just a single book. You never share your progress on Goodreads. You never post your favorite quotes. You find a nice quote, you just enjoy it. Maybe you don't even mention it in conversation. Just one book from time to time, only for you.

Not because sharing is evil or keeping it for yourself is the more noble thing, it's simpler actually. It's just about telling yourself: I didn't forget about you. I'm doing this for you. I'm reading this because I care about you.

Community. The second you say it, the second it isn’t really there. It exists only when the rest falls into place. What’s the rest?

Infrastructure, institutions, culture. Culture mirroring institutions and infrastructure. When we create spaces and time that align this is where “community” is found.

In the serendipitous interactions that feel like chance but are actually designed is a sense of offering the space for them to happen.

Could this be a great day?

Wake up naturally because alarm clocks are an insane concept. Ease into the day. No digital for the first hour, as this spikes dopamine too early.

A good meal and coffee around others.

Now there’s an option: you can do your local work now or later in the evening; there are shifts. What might your local work include? It is centered around local needs- food, water, energy, shelter, social.

Perhaps you help grow food, repair a shared building, prepare meals, teach a skill, care for children or elders, restore a watershed, maintain an energy system, or organize a neighborhood gathering.

This is not your entire identity, nor is it necessarily your career. It is simply part of belonging to a place.

Everyone contributes some portion of their time to maintaining the systems that make life possible. The work is visible. Its purpose is clear. You know who benefits from it because they are your neighbors, and you benefit from their work in return.

The rest of your day may be spent doing work connected to the wider world. You might collaborate with people across continents, build a company, study a subject, create art, conduct research, or solve a problem for someone you may never meet.

Technology allows your mind and your work to travel while your body and your responsibilities remain rooted in something real.

This is the balance: Globally connected, locally accountable.

After your work, you move through a place designed for life rather than merely for transportation. Daily needs are close enough to reach on foot or by bicycle. Children are present. Older people are present. Public spaces are essential infrastructure and deliberate.

You run into someone you know. You stop and talk because neither of you is rushing between isolated destinations. Perhaps you hear about a meal happening that evening, a project that needs another set of hands, or someone who could use support.

These interactions look spontaneous, but the conditions behind them are intentional.

There are shared kitchens, workshops, gardens, courtyards, libraries, bathhouses, studios, athletic spaces, childcare centers, and gathering rooms. There are places where participation costs nothing, and you do not need to buy anything to be.

There is enough privacy to feel like an individual and enough interdependence to remember that you are not one.

In the evening, people gather. Not every night and not through obligation, but often enough that loneliness does not become the default condition of adulthood.

There may be music, food, conversation, games, learning, planning, celebration, or simply the comfort of being around others without needing a reason.

The goal is to build something new: the freedom of modern life without its isolation, the reach of technology without its disembodiment, and the security of community without its coercion.

A person should be able to leave, explore, change, and become someone new. But they should also have somewhere meaningful to return to.

A future where place matters more and where we can connect to everywhere without losing our relationship to somewhere.

This is a resilient, strong, and joyful future. A future worth building.

I've always wanted to live in a wooden house in the mountains or near a lake, but I've never really looked into it. Any advice or opinions?

My husband and I are in our late twenties and are about to reach financial independence within the next year. He is also about to become a commercial pilot and has kept telling me I won’t have to work anymore as soon as we reach financial independence and he has his first pilot job.

(Nearly) Reaching financial independence has been a lot of work (working late nights & weekends next to full time job/schooling) + lots of saving and living frugally + lots of luck involved. We are basically achieving this through real estate (planning, building, renovating mostly by ourselves).

I have been working in consulting for over two years and ever since we started our real estate project I have steadily been losing interest in my job, especially client projects. I have always loved learning and have been a top student and enjoyed working, but this corporate environment is so incredibly boring. I am sitting in meetings, people use all kinds of management language and I just can’t get myself to care or even listen sometimes. I feel like none of it matters and just creates more work, which means more people will spend more time in front of the screen all day. I like the internal stuff in my company more compared to client projects. Client projects just always means new people, new projects, which then means complex, boring input I have to read and what I learn brings me personally zero value. I also haven’t climbed the career ladder really & I honestly don’t care because I don’t see the benefit of earning maybe 5% more for a lot more responsibility, being expected to work when sick and never being completely off. I have tried to suppress these feelings, but it just grows stronger and stronger and I don’t enjoy my Mondays to Fridays anymore. It’s a really good job relatively to other jobs - 90% remote, friendly co-workers, pay and work life balance is ok for consulting. I know I have a really good job, but at the same time, i feel extremely unmotivated and I am scared that the outlook of FIRE actually makes me lazy and will make me lose my job. I have always thought of myself about enjoying having a career but it has been the opposite lately and made me rethink everything.
I wonder if I could get interested in my job again or if I should just risk it all once we reach FIRE and do exactly what I want (starting a business and/orleaning in more into music) even if it doesn’t pay?

My background (bachelor and master’s) is in business, communication & human behaviour.

I appreciate some advice! Thanks!
TL;DR: Bored by my job in consulting in my late twenties. Feel like none of it matters, which makes me unmotivated and I could risk losing my job. Worried that financial independence has caused this.

Over the last few years I've noticed something strange.

I spent a lot of time trying to become "more productive."

I tried to-do lists.
Habit trackers.
Time blocking.
Pomodoro.
Fancy planners.

Apps that promised to optimize every hour of my day. For a while, it felt like I was making progress.

But eventually I realized I was spending almost as much time managing my productivity system as actually living my life.

Instead of asking,
"What do I want to do today?"

I started asking,
"What does my productivity app want me to do today?"

That realization made me wonder if I'd accidentally turned productivity into another chore.

Lately I've been trying the opposite approach—keeping things as simple as possible.

One meaningful goal. A few important tasks. Then putting my phone away and going outside.

Ironically, I feel calmer, and I don't think I'm accomplishing any less.

I'm curious how people here think about this.

• Do you still use productivity apps?
• If you do, what makes one worth keeping?
• If you don't, what finally made you stop using them?
• Have you found a simpler system that actually sticks?

I'm not looking for the "most productive" setup anymore.

I'm more interested in finding something that helps me stay intentional without constantly feeling like I'm trying to optimize every minute of my life.

I'd genuinely love to hear how others have approached this.

Hello everyone! I am soon becoming mom of 4 and I am looking for advice. I like clothes and accessories like handbags and backpacks. I decluttered lots of my clothes during previous years and I don’t really buy new ones, if I need something I am trying to thrift first.
My problem is that every once in a while I just get inspired by something random (I don’t have social media - so not really trends) and suddenly I buy something that I imagine myself wearing and it never happens.
I always go for simple outfits like black trousers/jeans/leggings, simple graphic or plain tshirt and oversized shirt on top. Since I became mom I know I feel the best wearing backpack because it frees my hands. But every once in a while I spend money on boho outfits or handbags that I end up not wearing. How can I get out of this vicious cycle? I like the clothes and accessories I am getting, I just know that I am not going to wear it because of practicality. Should I just get rid of it all? I am worried I am going to miss it. How can I get out of this cycle?

We've started the process of decluttering and downsizing our 3-bedroom home in hopes of selling it in about a year. We have lived here for 20 years. It is really eye-opening getting rid of massive amounts of stuff and re-living so many memories. It's making me very sad going through letters and photos of friends and family members who have passed away. I'm hoping the process gets easier and i don't feel as sad after a while. I want to feel lighter and like I'm moving toward something positive.

I think I need to back away from yt again, or at least be more careful with what I watch. Feel agitated, I guess cause in a way passionate about topic.... But also tired of government and everyone almost like pulling the wool over our eyes and screwing us over repeatedly. Argh... Hard to explain I guess, and trying to find out where I guess I draw my line.

I watched a video about consumerism and how the government lies or manipulates us to prop up the economy with constant buying. And how going no buy, and saving is better for us.

Right now I pretty much feel, I hate the government. Hate how they manipulate and lie to us. Take advantage of us. Abuse our money and steal from us.

It has made me realize, I do need to get back to my low buy list. So I've deleted the apps from my phone again. It's too easy to mindlessly shop for stuff vs intentionally going there for a product.

I feel restless right now.... And I'm not sure what that means.

If you've read this, thank you 🤗

She said: > Be kinder to yourself. You never ask: "What would be fun to get (or do)?" You always ask: "What's the best one?"...not everything has to be optimized you know?

(and later on...)

> I just wish you'd become as interested in enjoying your life as you are in trying to improve it...I think you'd actually be quite good at it.

That last comment especially hit me like a truck and quite honestly I've thought of little else for the last 48 hours.

I think I've spent my whole life optimizing for "becoming" rather than "being" if that makes any sense? Which is the best watch/game/shirt to buy, which is the best restaurant to go to, which car gives me the most miles per gallon, which vacation or hotel is the best value, how can I optimize my day to get the most done...when I should just be enjoying life more rather than planning what the perfect life could be. Not every restaurant choice or purchasing decision needs an hour reading reviews and searching for the best deals. Not every restaurant will be great, not every day will be perfect, just go with it.