u/Chrisjml

Bruh. Everything makes sense. And I learned what splitting was today after not being able to understand it. I feel like I am actually learning how to take care of myself after simply surviving for so long. I’m still in the early early process of DBT but I as of right now (I’m sure it’ll change tomorrow lmao) I feel like I can really start to take care of myself.

Hello all! I’ve never visited this subreddit until today. I’ve recently started therapy with a new therapist (I moved away from my long time therapist) and we did some assessments for bi polar, OCD (which I knew I had) and BPD.

She showed me my results and I was honestly shocked. I exceeded the criteria for the BPD diagnosis. I’ve struggled with mental health issues since I was 12. But I had never considered BPD so I never looked into it.

When she was reading me the pre-assessment criteria, I started thinking “oh no, this seems too on the nose”. And lo and behold, I’m wayyyyy up on the scale.

I’ve started reading up on it, and the only things I don’t relate to are the “inability” (I’m not sure how else to phrase it so please correct me if I’m wrong) to have long term friendships or relationships, and partially the dissociative episodes.

This has me spiraling quite a bit and I’m looking for more insight. Google can only do so much lol.

I guess I’m just looking for those who were diagnosed a little later (I’m 30), and things you have noticed that just, make sense with the diagnosis.

I guess I’m just looking for some guidance or a hand to hold during this process.

Thank you in advance :)

Howdy!

I’m trying to really hone in on my finances and trying to create a physical, visual budget. I struggle with excel a bit so I can’t quite figure that out. But I’m also just considering doing it with just pen a paper. I have all my finances laid out, update them regularly, but I want to track my day to day dollar amount. I’ve started saving receipts for credit card purchases and debit card purchases.

I am squeezinnnnnn to find money somewhere in my budget. I’m barely making it by and I hate relying on credit to help me.

Any apps or templates y’all could suggest?

I’ve tried rocket money, but it won’t let me into my account for some reason.

And I’ve tried monarch but I truly found it too confusing to set up properly.

Thank you in advance!!

So last night I was outside smoking a cig and a gentleman walks past me. He said “how ya doin?” Typical passerby question. I said “good good, yourself?” And the man just broke down.

He told me through choked tears that his wife had passed away and he just came back from the funeral. He asked if I had any food or a way to get food for him. I said, “yes of course.” Then I asked if he wanted a hug and he immediately pulled me in. He just started breaking down about how he felt like he just couldn’t live anymore and he just wanted to die and kill himself. He just couldn’t do it anymore. My heart broke instantly. I’ve been there, many many times. Currently going through it to be quite honest.

He then was honest with me and asked if I had any cash because he is an alcoholic and just wanted to get drunk and not feel. I told him I didn’t have cash but I did have a beer in my fridge I’d happily give him. Sometimes, regardless of your circumstance, you just need a fuckin drink.

So I walk him to an area where he could sit down. I asked his name and he asked mine and I told him I’d be right back and not to go anywhere.

I ran back to my apartment, packed him the rest of my pizza, (I’m currently really broke so I had no groceries), a beer, a cup of oranges, all the change I had, a bottle opener, and a couple of smokes.

As I was heading back out I saw him walking away with his head down. I shouted out to him and he spun around. I ran up to him with the bag and he said “I didn’t think you’d come back.” I said “of course I was coming back, I just had to collect all the stuff.” We went through the bag together and he was so grateful. He pulled me into another hug.

I was wearing a shirt that said “Mental Health Matters” and he saw it, read it out loud, and goes “fuck yeah it does! You have no idea but you’ve saved my life tonight. Thank you so much. I will never forget this. I love you man.” And shook my hand.

We went our separate ways, and I had decided earlier that day to start journaling again. So I sat down with my journal and wrote down my experience. I ended it with “this showed me that I do have a purpose.” I went back to my last entry from 3 months ago and I shit you not, it said “I don’t know what to do. I feel like I have no purpose in life, I feel so stuck.”

I will never ever forget last night and the man I met on the street.

Be kind to one another, yall. You never know what someone is going through. A simple act goes a long way. And sometimes, it helps you realize that you do indeed have a reason to be on this planet, it may not feel like it at times, but you never know who you’ll impact next.

EDIT: Shew! Y’all are cynical in these comments today lol. Sorry I can’t provide proof. And no, I’m not AI. REGARDLESS of the man’s circumstance, whether it was just a sob story to get some food or booze or what have you, I’m gonna help. That’s how I was raised, that’s just how I am. And in regards to giving him a single beer, yes, he is an alcoholic, should I have given him the beer? Maybe not, but that’s the reason I wasn’t willing to go and either get cash or go to the store and buy him hard liquor or a 12 pack. I gave the man a singular beer.

I felt it was a wholesome moment simply because it impacted both of our lives. I helped him and little did he know, he helped me. There should just be more compassion in the world these days. Times are hard. I help if i can.

Hello. First time ever being on this sub.

I’m a 29 y/o man (30 at the end of this month)

I’ve known my girlfriend (also 29) since we were 18. (We dated for a short period back then). We’re both pretty much gay but happen to have fallen in love with each other.

I was married to a man and she was with a nonbinary individual and now we are together. Have been for a little over a year now. We’re madly in love. I can’t see a life without her.

But shit, I miss men. So much. I don’t know what to do.

I can’t lose her. Not again. But I feel the need to be with men just lingering on my shoulders like a weight. We’ve talked about it but she is strictly monogamous. My marriage was not. So that’s another thing that I’m adjusting to. I’m just struggling guys. I need some guidance or help or something.

This may be controversial but I really hate the fact that there are trans men being talked about more in media. I feel like all of our secrets are being exposed. I’m stealth and pursuing RFF phallo and the fact that people know what that scar looks like is terrifying to me. Especially in this political climate (I’m in the southern US). I felt the same way when top surgery scars were being shown on family television in Meet the Fosters. I felt betrayed in a way.
I understand that representation is important to help those who are struggling to be like “hey this is maybe who I am” but i just struggle with the con of it.

Yall I didn’t realize how much I picked until my girlfriend offered me her little picking toy. It’s gotten so bad to where my head is almost always bleeding (and I’m bald so that doesn’t help) and I’m constantly picking at my arms and legs (when I get the chance) but mainly my arms and head and face.
Are there any suggestions yall have to stop this behavior? Idk what to do and I absolutely hate it

Aight yall. I’m getting surgery within the next 2 years, more likely closer to a year and a half. I need to lose at least 50lbs.

I’m at 225 now and need to be at most 180 to qualify for this surgery. (I’d rather not go into detail as to what it is).

BUT! I need help!! I know I can start with walkin but I need some help on go to easy healthy meals. I have time to meal prep so I can do that but I need ideas!!

Please drop or share your go to meals for lunch and dinner. (I don’t really eat breakfast because I’m up for work at 4am)

Thank you in advance!

EDIT: I’m 30 y/o male