u/GooseOk2512

Is it possible for chronic, ongoing stress to keep you in a depressive state that your current meds might otherwise be able to treat more effectively?

I’m relatively stable in the sense that I’m not suicidal, I can function and cope, and I’m not typically hypomanic. But my baseline mood is still mildly sad — more of an “it is what it is” feeling most of the time.

For better or worse, this is the best I’ve felt after years of trying different medications.

I guess I’m wondering whether it’s possible I might actually feel good on this combination if the stress in my life were reduced.

I hope so bc I’m running out of options, truly

My parents and I generally have a positive relationship and we are close. They’re very loving, caring, and do a lot to support me— I know I am blessed there.

But today (after traveling home for Mother’s Day) I overhead my dad talking about how I can be difficult to tolerate and emotionally draining, about the impact of working hard to parent me etc (I’m in my 30s and they do still support a fair amount even though I work full time and live alone etc). I went to my room for some space / to cry privately.

I am on meds and in therapy but have never found an effective med regimen— I’m very compliant however

Followed up with my mom about what I overheard and she was crying but trying not to, talking about how it’s hard to see me work so hard and not get better and how she works hard to support me but I’m always about the same (stable but not happy) She said it’s hard hearing from me sometimes and hearing about all the difficulties.

She lost a sibling to suicide so it worries her. We did end up apologizing and hugging and I assured her she was so supportive and I knew she was trying her best and that we both are— she had talked a lot about feeling scared and all the things she tries to do to help. I told her I’d work in therapy about communicating how I’m doing without worrying her and bringing out past trauma

I always have this fear that I’m a burden or too much, which I’ve worked on a lot in therapy; but the conversation I heard kind of opened up those wounds. I do know they are entitled to be frustrated w my situation just as I am— it’s just unfortunate I had to overhear it.

Only med changes have been Caplyta and upping my lithium by 300mg. Also anemic and coming off a heavy period.

The past week or so I’ve been very unsteady, wobbly, fell a few times, trouble on stairs. Lithium levels normal, sleep normal (though I’m waking up exhausted despite enough sleep), eating and drinking normally (w electrolyte too). Need to sit all the time bc standing makes me dizzy

Just wanted to see if this cpuld be BP before going to doctor, because I’m way past out of sick days.

Has anyone experienced similar, and how was it resolved?

I seem to be affected pretty quickly? (But I also take Ritalin which ofc is fast acting)

My tongue is literally sticking to my mouth and my lips are visibly peeling. The other day my mouth was so dry that you could like hear it in my voice? Yes I’ve tried biotene, vaseline etc— worth noting for lips that I have extremely sensitive skin. Ty! (My level is .6 if that helps)

Here’s my mixed episode ~~💡~~ idea!

Rent out a karaoke booth to just scream in, to like blink 182 or some other nostalgic angst. Just like pay to have somewhere to scream

Side note-what would be your song?

Mine would currently be Dark come soon, tegan and Sara for the emo closeted teen memories lol

I was left right before my wedding, following a long (and my only) inpatient stay. Single since then!

I have no idea how to date again—I worry I’m too much and that no one will be able to accept or deal with my bp2. That things will end as soon as I share my diagnosis. I know this is mostly trauma from the situation surrounding my breakup.

Not about self loathing, I genuinely do love myself and am proud of myself— i know I have a lot going for me. Relatively stable and good coping skills, have healthy relationships w friends and family, on meds and in therapy.

Lately when I’m anxious, my skin has this heavy feeling like I’m extra aware of it? It comes with itchiness particularly in my eyebrows. Idk if this is the rosacea, allergies, anxiety, or all three but it’s unbearable. All that really helps is splashing with cold water but that ofc doesn’t last.

Has anyone experienced similar?

Type 2 rosacea if it helps, currently in a flare being treated with doxycycline. Otherwise on ivermectin and azelaic acid