u/Imdespo_foradvice

I sit alone in most of my classes, and I just can’t stop doing it during class. I usually wear long shorts or a skirt so it’s really easy for me to just pull it up and cut. I always get a really big rush right after and one time I even cut my finger to get an excuse to go to the bathroom to clean myself up.

I don’t know why I keep doing it, and I want to stop. It’s only a matter of time until I get caught by either a classmate or a teacher. It’s usually with things I carry with me, since I’m an art student and need them for my pieces. I don’t know why I keep doing it even after my life has been so good recently.. I don’t know how to stop myself :/

This is like two years after my supposed “recovery” so I’m afraid to get external help now, because everyone thinks I’m better now but I’m just lying to everyone…

I sit alone in most of my classes, and I just can’t stop doing it during class. I usually wear long shorts or a skirt so it’s really easy for me to just pull it up and cut. I always get a really big rush right after and one time I even cut my finger to get an excuse to go to the bathroom to clean myself up.

I don’t know why I keep doing it, and I want to stop. It’s only a matter of time until I get caught by either a classmate or a teacher. It’s usually with a sharpener blade, but when I don’t have one I just use a really sharp pen. I don’t know why I keep doing it even after my life has been so good recently.. I don’t know how to stop myself :/

This is like two years after my supposed “recovery” so I’m afraid to get external help now, because everyone thinks I’m better now but I’m just lying to everyone…

I don’t know if this is normal, but around some cuts (sharpener blade on thigh), the area is purple. I want to know if it’s infected or bruised or whatever it is, because i’m worried. The cuts aren’t too deep, idk what it’s called but you could see the white bit when it was cut. It was really purple around the whole area for like a day or two but now it’s reduced and around the lines of the cut itself. Is this serious?
The blade was not clean and I was sweating when it was cut. Did not wipe or wash the cut with anything, and i was constantly touching it.

I’ve been doing stuff for years but this is the first time this has happened..