u/Infamous_Payment4608

**Disclaimer:** This is an imaginative exercise, not therapy or proof of what someone else thinks or feels. AI can only generate a response based on what you tell it. It can also bring up difficult emotions, so take it slowly and stop if it becomes overwhelming. I understand AI is a controversial subject, and I completely understand why some people have concerns about it. You don’t have to use AI for this exercise; you could write the imagined response yourself or work through it with a therapist.

I wanted to share a technique I recently tried that I thought might help others.

The idea is to write a letter to someone who hurt you, explaining what happened, how it affected you, and what you wish they could acknowledge. Then, using AI if you want, generate an imagined response from them that gives you the apology, accountability and recognition you may never receive in real life.

The aim isn’t to pretend they’d actually say these things, or to excuse what they did. It’s to help you process your feelings and realise that your pain doesn’t need their validation to be real.

Here’s the prompt I used:

“I want to use the ‘Answer You Deserve’ method. Here’s my letter to someone who hurt me. Please write an imagined response that sincerely acknowledges my pain, takes responsibility, and expresses remorse without excuses, manipulation or blame-shifting. The aim is to help me process what happened and release some of my dependence on their recognition. Don’t invent facts or claim to know what they genuinely think or feel.

Here’s my letter: \[Insert letter\]”

I found the idea meaningful because sometimes we spend years waiting for someone to acknowledge what they did to us. Maybe we can begin to heal without having to wait for them to give us the answer we deserved.

It’s not about forcing forgiveness or pretending it didn’t happen. It’s about learning to validate our own experiences, even if they never do.

Anyone else come to the realisation that the picture was so much bigger than just their own family? That this is a systematic problem, and you just see the signs everywhere you go. Not just a narcissistic family dynamic, but a whole societal narcissistic dynamic.

Psychopaths and narcissists in power everywhere, dishing out their abuse on scapegoats in workplaces, schools etc

The shallowness and fakeness we all have to portray just to fit in. Like everyone is living in a mass delusion, and we all act like success is virtue in this weird dynamic we’ve created.

It’s like a global cognitive dissonance, and you’re the crazy one for not going along with it. Your name and reputation is smeared for even questioning it.

It’s funny how we make mental health a personal responsibility, when it’s just a byproduct of the family, which is a byproduct of the system.

Like how will it genuinely affect humanity on a global scale? I know the phrase post-truth society is a recent phenomenon, but what happens when we truly can’t decipher what is real and what isn’t?

This is a bit of a touchy rant, so I’m trying to be careful with my words.

I just want to say that I’m sick to death of hearing phrases like ‘Not all men are rapists, but it’s always a man’, and the general idea that I have to feel guilty for what is in between my legs.

Why it hits so hard is that this is in the knowledge that I was sexually abused by a woman who I should have been able to trust when I was a young boy. Fuck the whole idea that rape or assault just happens to vulnerable girls and women.

In no way am I trying to diminish anyone else’s pain or trauma, but all those men who have to sit in silence with their pain, in a world that seems to hate us all. Fuck that shit!

Personally, I have major trust issues stemming from childhood and relationships. I have tried to fix this through therapy, but I’m not sure if it’s even possible anymore because of the whole dynamic.

You are basically put on the stand and told to express every thought, emotion and feeling you have towards yourself, others and the therapist in front of you. To remove every defence you have.

At the same time this stranger in front of you is given the keys to your soul. They get to be judge, jury and executioner. The power they hold is unimaginable. At the same time, you never get to know who they truly are. If they can be trusted, and what their thoughts, emotions and feelings towards you actually are.

This is not an equal relationship for creating a healthy pattern of attachment. No wonder narcissistic and psychopathic individuals are attracted to such a profession.

Any others really struggle with this?

I have come to a realisation that maybe I meet the criteria for Avoidant Personality Disorder.

Under the DSM-5-TR, a person generally needs at least 4 of these 7 features:

- Avoids work or activities involving significant interpersonal contact because of fear of criticism, disapproval, or rejection.

- Doesn’t want to get involved with people unless reasonably certain they’ll be liked.

- Shows restraint in intimate relationships because of fear of being shamed or ridiculed.

- Is preoccupied with being criticized or rejected in social situations.

- Is inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy.

- Views themselves as socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others.

- Is unusually reluctant to take personal risks or try new activities because they might prove embarrassing.

-

I actually think I meet all seven features, and it’s such a destabilising experience. I have no family, friends or intimate relationships and have totally isolated myself. My only contact is through counselling and online CPTSD meetings.

I hate the feeling of being a ghost, and not having the ability to interact with the world.

I know it’s normal for anger to come up during recovery, but it’s so much. Just pure cold disdain for people.

The average human is so judgmental and selfish. I’ve been treated like shit for so long, and it makes you realise that humans just suck.

People are too easy to dehumanise and hurt others, it actually makes me sick. I know my therapist would say, you are generalising, but I sincerely think we are a stain on this planet.

Does anyone else get majorly triggered by people who are passive aggressive?

It seems to be a massive trigger for my freeze response. I read about the definition somewhere about it being Nasty Nice, like a feigned politeness while hiding true hostility.

It’s the hardest thing to prevent too. Point it out, and you get denial and gaslighting. Ignore it, and I’ve found many will ramp it up.

I actually prefer outright hostile behaviour in others, and respect it more, at least they are genuine.

I’m new to this subreddit and Antinatalism, but I’ve always connected with the idea that life is suffering and questioned the idea of bringing someone into this world. I know a lot of this comes from my childhood trauma, and relationships with my family. However, I see that there is a lot of logic in these ideas and it’s hard to objectively counter it.

With that all said, I was wondering if anyone who has struggled with these concepts and ideas for longer, has come to any conclusions about how to find meaning and hope in spite of this?

I just came across a realisation. When I am in a freeze state, I feel like I get perceived by others as sometimes arrogant and/or untrustworthy.

Does anyone have the same experience, or have any other misinterpretations you feel you get from others?