u/Jrgaming42

I 23M had a first date with 21F. I think it went well I took her out to dinner and we ended up talking for hours. We talked about various things like highschool memories, what we want in dating, the future, etc. There’s some overall agreement. She at first didn’t think she was ready or had too much going on to date (she just moved and is starting at a new college). She regretted that told me about it and we had a good date. We are planning to see each other again tomorrow.

I asked her what her love langue is and she said she’s not good with physical touch specifically “I don’t like people touching up on me” but mentioned she’s more touchy feely with a close friend of hers. The friend is a woman who’s married they’ve known each other a long time. I said physical touch is my biggest love language and words of affirmation. She said my two favorite are what she’s worst at. She also said she enjoys her independence and space. She essentially wants us to be able to have separate lives outside of a relationship (which I agree with).

She also asked about how often I think we should see each other and talk (via text) and what if she felt like not taking. I gave her the example of if you’re busy and won’t respond a large part of a day a heads up is appreciated. She felt fine with that and understands me I’d say. She asked how many kids I want I said 2-3 but open to other numbers. She said 1 and maybe none but said that could change. I’m not worried about it because we are young and life changes. We also agree that seeing each other at least once a week is a good balance.

She mentioned not having much of a dating history because it “wasn’t her thing” says she basically had like 2 serious relationships. I don’t know about her sexual history or anything. I don’t know but I get the vibe she potentially has been hurt or assaulted. I totally understand if she doesn’t want to talk about that and won’t try to pry. I want her to feel comfortable with telling me only whatever she wants to.

She seems very sweet and genuine. I asked her despite wanting her own space and avoiding dating what she wants from it or why do it. She simply said having a person to share life with or something to that effect. I get the vibe she wants a romantic relationship but just wants to be careful with her heart. I also am probably way overthinking this stuff.

I know I do enjoy physical affection including hand holding, hugging, cuddling, kissing, etc. I also enjoy my partner initiating that. I’m not in any rush for those things in dating but also know I want that. She felt really easy to talk to so that’s a good sign. We never discussed sex at all which is probably normal for a first date. She mentioned she’s religious and didn’t ask anything relating to my beliefs even after I asked if there’s really important things she wants or doesn’t want in someone.

Overall are there any major things that could be a red flag? My feelings are that I simply think she’s a good person and I enjoyed being around her is just keep seeing each other. I appreciate all advice and guidance.

I’m online a decent bit and see many women talk about the habits and behaviors of the men they’re married to or dating. I understand nobody is perfect that’s fine. I just see women say things like “he’s got a porn addiction” and “he’s cheated on me”. I also see stuff like “he doesn’t communicate and gets mad at what I do”.

I read the levels of abuse women put up with and I’m like how can you do this. I’m not perfect by any means but I’d like to date a woman and get to know her. I even have a friend who’s got a bf who had legit left a bruise on her and treats her like trash.

I just would like to show a woman that there’s gentle, mature, intelligent, kind, and loving men out here still.

I 23m have been using dating apps and when I do match a lot of times I just never get a response. I’ve seen online some seem to like super funny abrasive messages. I’ve also seen some like sweet.

Typically I’ll just give them a compliment like their eyes,hair, or smile. Then try to ask about their hobbies/interests. Should I just ask for a date off rip? I’m looking for a long term relationship. Maybe some women are fine with planning a date then getting to know each other more on it? Any tips and advice helps. Thanks!

I 23m have been single for over a year now. I’ve only had 3 sexual relationships. In my time being single it’s felt hard to not think about intimacy. I honestly desire it but I also actually want a relationship and a true loving connection.

I’ve stopped watching pornography because of how detrimental it is to mental health. I guess it’s just difficult to deal with having a high libido. I also would say I deal with a lot of envy and loneliness.

In some experiences of trying to date I’ve figured out I don’t want to wait until marriage. My reasoning is mainly for compatibility reasons and simply wanting that level of intimacy with my partner.

I see everyone else in relationships and getting married and wonder if I’ll ever have that. I’m the only person I know not in a relationship and it’s quite frustrating. It often feels like there’s something wrong with me.

I know this is a hot take among men but hear me out. I’m not talking about wanting a guy cause he has a nice car or the best house. I’m talking about simply wanting a guy who can pay his bills, have employment, save money, invest, and have a good credit score. These are all things that prove you’re a responsible adult who can handle life to some degree.

Do I think it’s good for women to have those qualities too? Absolutely! It’s just annoying when all these men are like “women just want money” like bro most just want you to not blow all your money on bs and be a responsible man. It also probably gives women a psychological feeling of safety like if I live with this guy we won’t have to worry about our power getting cut off or the car getting re possessed.

I 23m feel like a truly hopeless romantic. I have wanted to fall in love and find my person my whole life. I dream of having a beautiful bride who loves me who’s excited to have my last name and share life with me. Who laughs at my jokes and feels comfort when I walk into a room.

I want to understand a woman all of her dreams, fears, and desires. I want to give her fun surprises and make her feel loved. I want her to know everyday I love her. I have experienced multiple rejections but just struggle to keep pushing for that person. My future wife I want to meet her and love her.

I was in junior year of highschool and I was in band.
I met this girl at one of our football games from interacting with the other band. We hit it off and started a relationship.

One day we were at my house just hanging out. We started making out and then started dry humping.
I had only had sex with 1 woman at the time so I was much enjoying this. We didn’t go past the dry humping but suddenly stopped and had a discovery.

I looked down and my jeans had blood on them. Yes she was on her period and she bled through her jeans and onto mine. She was so embarrassed but I comforted her and told her it was alright.

I called her “my little ketchup packet” and she proceeded to smack me on the arm. I definitely deserved that in hindsight. We got cleaned up and I swore I’d never tell anyone about it and I haven’t until now.

We ended up breaking up later because of incompatibility. A few months after one of my best friends asked if he could date her and I said sure even though I kinda felt hurt. They’ve been together ever since for over 5 years and are now engaged. Hopefully they’ll invite me to the wedding. I genuinely hope they have a happy and long marriage. Maybe someday I can find my person too.

I 23m struggle on dating apps and online presence. I have had multiple instances of matching with women and then they get a glimpse of my Instagram and ghost me. I simply believe in doing myself a disservice with bad photos and clothes.

I’ve noticed that other men have way better photos of themselves online I just don’t know how to take better photos of myself to look better, more confident, less awkward, etc.

My wardrobe specifically for summer or hotter time seems bad. I wear mostly black or graphic tees and notice most men simply wearing basic tees with lighter colors (blues, reds, greens, etc). Shorts is an area I think I need to improve on as well along with shoes.

Context I’m a thinner guy who’s 6’5 but doesn’t have muscle mass. I also have a slight gut but nothing crazy. I also wear glasses. I can also showcase my dating profiles for more advice. Any advice on how to improve my overall looks and what women specifically look for and judge would help a ton. I’d also appreciate certain places/brands to recommend for shopping. I’m mostly talking simple everyday clothes out and about.

I’m going to the Raiders vs Saints game and got 3rd row!!!! I’m so excited to finally watch my Raiders in person I’m excited to see the fans and have a blast. We better kick their ass. JUST WIN BABY!!!

I 23m have been on dating apps for around a year and struggled finding a girlfriend. I’ve tried using instagram and Snapchat as well. Since college my social life has essentially died. I go to the gym, work, and that’s about it.

A little about myself I’m a 6’5 guy who wears glasses and is hairy. I’m also on the thinner side but I don’t have a lot of muscles or anything. I say this to describe how I look physically. I think my pictures could be improved but I don’t know where to start on how to do that.

When it comes to lifestyle I’ve always been more of a nerdy ish guy. I love watching sports and stuff but I also enjoy board games. I also enjoy other activities like playing pool, bowling, and simply hanging out. I just simply don’t have friends to do that with. I also live with my parents but plan to change that in the coming months.

Religion and politics seems to be a huge thing in dating these days (don’t want a debate or controversy). I personally believe in Jesus but I’m not saint or perfect guy. I’d prefer to have sex before marriage as I want compatibility and living with a partner prior. My politics is more conservative but I don’t particularly like many politicians period including the don. I say that to say my preference is for them to just not be liberal. I’m fine with moderate, don’t care, or conservative. I’ve dated a liberal girl and it was constant fighting.

I also know I want kids in my life. I simply want to have someone to have fun with and enjoy life together. I’m just trying to see where and how I can improve my odds. Clothing could be another area I can improve at but unsure how.

I also have self esteem issues and think it plays a factor as well. I just feel unattractive compared to most men and like women get one look and turn away. I’m trying to go to the gym to improve that. I’m also about to finish my MBA.

Any and all advice is greatly appreciated and thank you for reading all of this.

I 23m make 52k gross and take home about 3k a month. I currently live with my parents but desire to move out for independence, mental growth, and experience budgeting. I live in a low cost of living area. I don’t have any debt or car payments. My dad thinks I should look at getting a car but I don’t want the payment. Is this enough income to move out? I also have over 20k in savings.

Edit: I have transportation my vehicle just has 160k miles on it and my dad said upon moving out he would give me another car that’s an early 2000s model.

I 23m live with my parents. I’m about to finish my masters degree in a good field. I have a job that’s new I’m enjoying so far. I think I have deep self esteem issues. I’ve always had a hard time believing in myself and having confidence. I’m insecure about the way I look, act, and simply exist. My parents raised me good for the most part. In highschool and college I had decent friends and friend groups.

I’ve been through many romantic heartbreaks. My most recent relationship ended over a year ago. Since graduating I’ve essentially only had 1 friend I talk to/see on a regular basis and have no social life. I overthink everything all of the time. How people perceive me, why I don’t get attention on dating apps, etc. I would like to date and find my person it’s something I’ve wanted more than anything. My dream in life is to be a husband and father. Not to just check off boxes but to give me purpose, excitement, duty, and be needed.

I went to therapy a couple times in college and he said I have a strong likelihood of anxiety. I simply want friends in my life and to be cared about. My parents love me deeply but I also want connection with people my age. I want to be able to hangout with guys and watch football. I want to laugh and make jokes with people. I wish I still had girl friends who could give me dating advice. This may sound like a lot of dependency but I do enjoy alone time sometimes.

The isssue is that’s overwhelming most of my time. I want to move out to get away from the annoyance on my parents. Their rules and basically being in my business. Anytime I go do anything they want to know who I’ll be with, where I’m going, and why. I am a grown man and don’t feel like it honestly. I feel behind in my life compared to my peers. I feel like a black sheep to the world. My religious affiliation is Christian but I don’t attend church due to the fact I’ve always found it uncomfortable.

I seek connection and belonging. It’s like the spark of my life has died and I’m not sure how to relight it. Any and all advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading all of this.

I 23m was talking to this girl for about 2 months. She seemed interested as I asked her last weekend if she wanted to go on a date. She said yes and then we planned it. Yesterday I had said I was looking forward to it and she replied “me too!”. I’ve had numerous bad dates and failed relationships. I know a lot of people may say to just get over it. I’m just so tired and frustrated with dating.

I’ve been single for a year now. I’m not upset at the fact she’s not interested but it’s like why lead me on. I was so excited that I could get to continue to get to know this woman and potentially connect with her. I also keep having this feeling I care too quickly or fall too fast. I really try to be hesitant in getting my hopes up because dating is so unpredictable. I just want to love a woman and not be seen as weak for actually giving a fuck. I just feel lost and hurt I guess. Any advice or guidance on how to navigate all this is appreciated.

I 23m starting talking to this woman (21f) on Instagram. It was going well so I asked for her number. We have a date planned Saturday (I’m taking her to lunch). This happened in a span of about 2 ish months. She seems super sweet and has some similar interests to me. She at times over text can be very dry and not message much. At times it gives me conflicting vibes of her interest. She went to me highschool but I didn’t know of her until recently.

She also seems religious which I’d say I am as well but not extremely. I don’t go to church for example. I’ve also got this vibe she could be hiding things she’s ashamed of from her past. I just know I’m trying to get to know her and see where things go. She’s very beautiful and seems to have a good heart so. Am I fine and just overthinking this?

I 23M have been single for about a year now. I already know many people may say “that’s not that long” and “you’re really young.” I’m aware of both of those things and I’m grateful. The problem is I see everyone I know getting married and having children. I see love all the time around me and wish it could be me. I’m tired of everytime I want to spend time with someone it’s always with their significant other and they deem you an asshole for it. I went to a concert not to long ago and my friend brought his gf along. I don’t dislike her or anything but it’s uncomfortable to essentially watch a date.

I want nothing more on this earth than to have the romantic love I’ve always dreamed of. I often feel lonely because I don’t have much of a social life. I’ve been trying to find ways to improve my appearance (updating my clothes, going to the gym, better haircut, etc). I work my job and go to the gym. I’ve never really been a bar type guy but have debated it. I don’t drink or do drugs. I consider myself Christian but I’m a sinner. I feel like from repetitive heartbreak it makes new dating experiences scary. The dating apps are atrocious as always for men. I might as well try to talk to a wall.

It all just feels hopeless and I also have the desire to have physical intimacy again. I don’t engage in hookups or anything like that. I wish I had someone who would love me for who I am. I wish I could have someone to love,hold, and cherish. A lot of times I simply wonder what’s wrong with me. I feel like I’m just seen as ugly, weird, or just plain boring. I just don’t really know what to say or how to feel. I know I want love and feel like something is wrong with me.

I 23m have been trying to stop using porn and improve my life. I have a dream of being a husband and father one day. I fear that dream will die if I never truly get rid of this addiction. I’ve noticed for me I just have a super high sex drive and being single for a while makes it hard to not want sex. I think about sex all the time and wanting to have it. I do know that I also deeply desire a deep emotional connection with a woman with the physical. I guess I simply desire to connect with someone.

I 23M just started a job working for the state government specifically as an auditor. I worked at two public accounting firms and hated it due to the high stress, long hours, and feeling like I couldn’t succeed. I wanted to get thoughts and advice from those who have or are working in government to see how they like it. As far as pay I live in a low cost of living area and start at around 52k. The pay potential from what I’ve seen can go up into over 130k. I also think the benefits are pretty good. What’s your guys thoughts on government accounting for a career?

I’ve been playing chess for a couple months now and can feel overwhelmed. I’m wanting to improve but see that people say I shouldn’t study many openings yet. I currently mostly play Italian and caro. Against 1.d4 I simply play d5 and go from there. I understand development and getting the pieces active. How do I improve? Should I play more games? Should I study my games more? I just want good simple advice to as quickly as I can improve and be more competitive at the game. I also love chess.