u/Legitimate_Finger670

I know this is probably a generalization, and I don’t mean this to be offensive but just saw a fully white man name himself satoru,

I talked to him about it and he said

“we are all being opressed stop creating more infighting!”

They always say something like this

and it really made me think about how so many white trans men do things like dye their hair black, or name themselves things like “kai“ to the point where it’s become a stereotype of a white trans person.

why have things from East Asia become stereotypes for white people? It is kind of weird to me.

can a white perosn explain this weird facination/ infantilization with this?

I’m a trans guy but I even feel guilty for just posting this because I don’t feel like I belong here somehow.
im feisnds with all females because I don’t fit in with cis men, I’ve never had a cis man see me as a man.
my female friends don’t see me as a female (they are my friends after all) but that also means that I’m not one of them.
they call each other their wives, are always sweet and caring to each other, while I get to be the “man of the group” when I’m with them, it isn’t horrible it jus makes me feel kind of less than. Like when they all go in the women’s bathroom and they constantly hype each other up and I know they love me too but it’s just not the same.
my only other trans friend only cares about talking about being trans with me. I like him but I just feel cringed out sometimes and I just feel like I’m so much more than just that and it just makes me feel like i know nothing about being trans when I’m around him .

that could be internalized transphobia but who knows.

like we had a sleepover and all he wanted to talk about was our “trans experiences“ wich is cool and all but I really just don’t feel like me and him are the same type of peron at all.
like I’m girly, I don’t really care about passing. like I really don’t at all, not as much as I want to look good.
but when I say that I feel like I’m not taking myself seriously Enough and I need to be stressed and sad about the fact that I don’t pass, even when I’m perfectly happy.

he is obviously not that kind of guy, and it’s not like he’s policing me or making me feel bad about not passing or anything but it’s clear that this is something he genuinely struggles with for himself and I just can’t relate to that and I find it hard to relate to or talk about with him.

I don’t even feel like I fit in online queer spaces like I honestly don’t feel like I have the same humor or Act like the trans people on here or even have the same priorities. Not even here just the whole of the internet , I am yet to find a trans person or any person who feels like my kind of person.

Honestly I feel Guilty that I have to find trans spaces so cringe, but i Don’t belong with my female friends, I’m not friends with any men and they all think I’m a girl because I actually look like one (I’m not saying that to be self pitying I genuinely wear makeup.)

and that’s not me saying I’d fit in with feminine guys or gay guys cause again cis men dont see me as a man, gay or not.

i just feel like I don’t belong honestly anywhere and that’s not me trying to be all sad like I am a really happy person but sometimes it just feels like there’s no one whos Actually ”my person” do any other Trans people get this?

I have an older brother and even at the age I am now he is always assumed to be more responsible or smart than me when that’s not the case at all. 

when he puts something in the dishwasher  wrong, he is not called out for it and it’s gets laughs it off as a joke, but when I do it it’s always “that’s something your brother would do” and told to do it right. he was allowed to travel alone at my age, but my Parents wont allow me to, even though I’ve proved I am able to navigate even better than him at my age. 

my parents to will call me clumsy and stuff when in reality I see me and my brother make a lot of the same “clumsy“ mistakes I’m just called out more for it. (Spilling drinks sometimes, getting food on my clothes like spaghetti sauce, wich is bad but he does it ALL OF THE TIME and he’s never called clumsy or been looked at like he was stupid for it) 

my dad feels the need to mansplain movies and jokes to me (even after I have understood them perfectly the first time just didn’t say anything) while he doesn’t feel the need to with my brother 

my brother never has to help my mom or dad with dinner, yet I have to everyday. 

I can’t show as much additude as my brother can. He will come home from work acting mean to everyone, judging everyone and everything they do, being dry to my mom and dad.

they will say that poor him he’s probably had a long or hard day. 

when I try to act the same way, they assume I’m trying to be smart or sassy, maybe that j have a bad attitude and that I just need to chill out. it makes me feel like I can’t be as much of a teenager as he can be, I have to be mature and happy ALL OF THE TIME, or else Im being a jerk but when he does it “He’s just having a hard day” 
have any other women noticed something like this??? Am I completely overreacting?

if we were living in a simulation, or if you were just a brain floating around in space, how would you ever be able to tell? And how would you ever be able to escape?

I dont think k you would

. Yes, you could know the physics of your own world, but that physics would describe the rules of the code rather than the true fundamental nature of reality

I just don’t understand why instead of focusing on this, letting it affect your life, getting sad over it, and trying to find “glitches“ would do anything.
just enjoy your life

Maybe too weird of a question, but small dry shampoo bottles are normally very expensive and the large ones aren’t allowed through tsa. J have thought about powder alternatives like cornstarch but tge Containers are too big for tsa aswell. And for obvious reasons I can’t have white powder in a bag or small container unlabeled.

I’m 15, I don’t pass. I don’t put in effort to pass and I don’t want to till I’m older. this means I genuinely lose the right to be gendered correctly especially by strangers and I’m completely fine with that for now.
my friends are all girls, i never talk about being trans with them they do actually gender me correctly and tend to like me. but they treat another trans person in our school like an actual parasite for no reason.
Im always nice to this guy, he is a little cringe but thats really not an issue or a reason to treat someone horribly Imo.
They make comments about how he fakes a deep voice and how cringe his outfits is and every time he talks about being trans (wich is something I don’t really like to do) they laugh about it afterwards and call him things like lily tino and stuff like that. And it really rubs me the wrong way even though I understand being cringed out.
we were at our friend quince the other night and constantly when he was trying to hang around us they would whisper to eachother about him, give him weird looks, and try to run away using me as a way to distract him. They also say that he is Pervy for wanting to hangout with us.
I’m not acting like I’m completely immune to this because yeah I do find it annoying when someone who doesn’t know you well or o ly wants to talk about trans stuff with you when I feel like I’m so much more than just that, but treating him this way just honestly seems really awful. When I hang around him, my friends give me side eyes and treat me like I’m “guilty by association” for what? Just being around someone who’s outwardly trans?
i crashed at his house after the party and we had a long talk about how he felt about all of it, and how people have started rumors about him, and how one person said he was jealous of a girls flat chest and calling her ugly and stuff when it never happened.

idk I just feel really bad, and I feel like my friends are going to view me in the same way if I do decide to transition in the future, they are really fun to be around and everything but how they are treating this guy I feel like goes deeper than just not liking him cause he’s a little corny and maybe its really just about him being trans. maybe this take is to woke but I want to hear y’all’s opinions on the situation.

My Mom and I, a 15 year old girl keep getting in fights. A few minutes ago she Had finished watering her plants and I had been making tea (we had been having family over for awhile now, I think like two weeks shere I was dealing with my younger cousin and I had been taking some chill time but I haven’t seen my dad in awhile and we normally go every other week) that I asked “when will I go over to dads?”

She answered that she had already asked me if I had wanted to go over to dads days ago, and that it was too late now and he was leaving for a trip.

Because she hadn’t, I told her that “oh I didn’t know I was able to go to dadsa two days ago, you never told me.” She said that I was having A bad attitude and walked to her office angrily. this has been a reaccouring thing where she thinks I’m being mean or having attitude or “mad” at her when I’m not.

. I went into her study wanting to resolve the situation and she looked at me like I was being crazy when j tried to explain that I wasn’t mad with really wide eyes and everything. I told her that I just wanted to see my dad and started crying,thats is weird because I’m an authenticity really happy person.

I asked her why she thought I was being mad and she said “the way you said it sounded really hostile and like you were blaming me when j already gave you an opportunity to go to dads“ then it went on this whole thing where I tried to explain to her that a lot of times when she Thinks I’m mad that I’m not,

wich she then said that saying someone “always” does something is disheartening and how she always makes an effort to be nice to me

the. I explained that sometimes I feel like she appreciated others more than she appreciated me or is more easy going when people like my brother ask questions like that vs me where she always thinks I’m having an additude.
she asked me for examples of this situation and when I gave a few to her she told me I was cherry picking and that we have a different dynamic than me and My brother and that we spend more time together so that treating me that way is normal. am I in the wrong? How to I get my mom to like me again?

when I just be myself, I feel like I’ll say something wrong or I will get judged for not having the right opinions, aditude etc. I will sit and watch videos and content j live for hours just so I can kind of mimick who I see and make sure that I’m still myself and can still talk to people the way that they would interact. Funny thing is, doing this makes me more self aware of what I sa, making me sound more awkward and weird wich just confirms to my brain that I’m acting and being weird wich will make me overcompensate more and the cycle just goes on and on and on. Sometimes if I don’t do something how it was done last week exactly to a tea I feel like I’m not myself and I’m acting weird and that in turn makes me act more weird and the cycle continues. Have any of you experience this also?

So I am a 15 year old girl I have two younger boy cousins who are 13 and 9. j don’t have a problem with them, I actually like them a lot! I just got back from a two day international standby trip With my mom where she was stressed about this family gathering the whole time and was yelling and having a hard time the whole trip. I was Also deep into the luteal phase and just started my period (I have pmdd) We didn’t get much sleep and once we got home we had about 15 minutes before my cousins showed up and we left to live in a bigger house airbnb in my hometown that could fit the whole family including my grandma and two stepsisters. So after staying up all Night in that flight j was immediately judged by my aunt and uncle for not hanging out with their cousins enthusiastically.
when I said no to doing something with the cousins to get my rest befoee a big weekend, my cousins pulled on my hair, threw pillows at my face, and just treated me like garbage and wouldn’t leave me alone. my aunt and uncle did nothing to stop it, and instead just laughed about how “cute” their boys were being.

(maybe I’m wrong, but a 13 year old (atleast me at 13) knows better than to act 5. and do stuff like that.)

his parents did nothing to stop their weird harassment and inability to take a ”no” and My uncle got mad at me for not wanting to play with them, making sarcastic jokes about how I was just a mean self absorbed teenager. I do understand that yeah, it comes off as selfish to not want to play with my cousins, but it gets to a point where I just want some time to myself.
I also take awhile to get ready in the morning. I like to have my time so that morning after sleeping in the floor I was able to get the bathroom for 5 minutes before the Cousins immediately got to me again. They had taken my pads and were opening them and throwing them all over the place (13 year old btw) but the adults said the boys were just young and didn’t know any better. My uncle called me a party pooper for not wanting to go in the trampoline with them at 6 in the morning and instead wanted some time to myself to get ready. im still in my hometown, and I feel a lot of pressure to look good when I see my friends and I will sense we live in such a small place. My uncle is now making me go to the carnival and all of the Fourth of July celebrations with my cousins and is making me go to a carnival (which im not a fan of sense i het scared of the rides😢) while watching my young cousins in my hometowm. I love my cousins but I wish my family knew that I need time to myself and their 13 year old son is old enough to not do these things, dare I say their 9 year old too.

we were biking around with my cousins also and we passed my friend who was on her trampoline and they said she looked funny and 10 years younger than me. I was so embarrassed. And my uncle mocked anither friend I saw at the sipermarket. I know it sounds trashy but I just feel EMBARASSED and unprepared to see people i know at the Fourth of July celebration when I am under this pressure to watch and play with my cousins but also preform for my peers and see my friends. Am i in the wrong here?

I don’t feel like I just expedite being awkward at the coffee shop or scared to talk to people, the anxiety I feel kind like a whole entire feeling in my brain and mind.
I get this feeling like I’m not myself. I litterally overthink every thought I have. I start to notice when I didn’t do something exactly like the week before when I was my “normal” self and I will watch content that makes me feel like myself and do things exactly how I did them last week (watch the same videos, do the same activities at the same time, etc) to try to feel normal. Sometimes I feel so weird and distressed I just want to cry. I know I should chill out but EVERYTHING I do  just makes me feel so awful and weird and distressed. Every time I have a thought I didn’t have back when I felt “normal” I feel like I’m weird, and this causes me to be socially awkward and once I have an awkward interaction because I’m looking at myself from this weird outside over analyzing everything I do it just confirms to me that I’m acting weird Wich makes all of it worse and confirms my fears even typing this out wich I’ve never done is distressing. If ANYONE has experienced this loop before please tell me, or how you dealt with it. Or if this is anxiety or something else. 

I don’t feel like I just expedite being awkward at the coffee shop or scared to talk to people, the anxiety I feel kind like a whole entire feeling in my brain and mind.
I get this feeling like I’m not myself. I litterally overthink every thought I have. I start to notice when I didn’t do something exactly like the week before when I was my “normal” self and I will watch content that makes me feel like myself and do things exactly how I did them last week (watch the same videos, do the same activities at the same time, etc) to try to feel normal. Sometimes I feel so weird and distressed I just want to cry. I know I should chill out but EVERYTHING I do  just makes me feel so awful and weird and distressed. Every time I have a thought I didn’t have back when I felt “normal” I feel like I’m weird, and this causes me to be socially awkward and once I have an awkward interaction because I’m looking at myself from this weird outside over analyzing everything I do it just confirms to me that I’m acting weird Wich makes all of it worse and confirms my fears even typing this out wich I’ve never done is distressing. If ANYONE has experienced this loop before please tell me, or how you dealt with it. Or if this is anxiety or something else. 

I’ll start off with saying I’m 15, and only this year have started experiencing these weird periods. I haven’t found anyone who has related to me or had he same issue as me, I feeel like a total weirdo.

I don’t just experience sadness, anxiety, mood swings or being angry for a bit out of the month (like crying more than usual over things or something) it’s a whole entire feeling in my brain and mind.
every luteal phase I get this feeling like I’m not myself. I litterally overthink every thought I have. I start to notice when I didn’t do something exactly like the week before when I was my “normal” self and I will watch content that makes me feel like myself and do things exactly how I did them last week (watch the same videos, do the same activities at the same time, etc) to try to feel normal. Sometimes I feel so weird and distressed I just want to cry. I know I should chill out but EVERYTHING I do for like 3 weeks just makes me feel so awful and weird and distressed. Every time I have a thought I didn’t have back when I felt “normal” I feel like I’m weird, and this causes me to be socially awkward and once I have an awkward interaction because I’m looking at myself from this weird outside over analyzing everything I do it just confirms to me that I’m acting weird Wich makes all of it worse and confirms my fears even typing this out wich I’ve never done is distressing me. Even if this Weit’s look isn’t pmdd I really just want someone to know and understand or have experience with what I’m talking about.